anxiety after a frightening incident

tom_tarbucket

hi,I don't even know if this is the correct forum for this so apologies if not.

I'm a otherwise healthy 36 year old male, no previous sicknesses

.about 2 weeks ago our only child that's 1 year old had a "febrile convulsion "was terribly scary at the time........baby in a seizure, frothing at the mouth, in and out of consciousness, eyes rolling in head.I honestly thought he was dying in my arms and I was having my last few moments with him. my wife was also with me at the time.He then had another convulsion less than 24 hours later, that was less scary.


I now know that these convulsions are not very dangerous but at the time I didn't know that.

since the incident, I've had a feeling that I've never had before..........sometimes feels like my heart is going to stop, other times feels like it's going to explode. sometimes it feels like a missed heartbeat sensation. its just a weird feeling


.Every time I hear the baby noise or a loud noise it gets worse. I get images of the baby in a convulsion in my head.I haven't been sleeping at night too well.went to the doctor and she checked me out and said my least rate was fine, blood pressure fine. She gave me 4 relaxer type tablets and 3 sleeping pills. I have them taken now. She just said I had anxiety.


anybody ever experience something like this, specifically in regard to feeling like your heart is going to stop etc ?

JJJJNR

Try to avoid any strong anti anxiety prescription drugs if possible. You could try managing it using mindfulness meditation, that way you can train yourself to "avoid" the harrowing feeling you get when you are having an attack, in time stop the attacks, not a quick fix but more of a life tool.

Good place to start -

http://www.mindfulnesscds.com/

tom_tarbucket

JJJJNR wrote: »

Try to avoid any strong anti anxiety prescription drugs if possible. You could try managing it using mindfulness meditation, that way you can train yourself to "avoid" the harrowing feeling you get when you are having an attack, in time stop the attacks, not a quick fix but more of a life tool.

Good place to start -

http://www.mindfulnesscds.com/

thanks. It's not really like an "attack" though. Just seems to be kinda there the whole time since the event happened.

Wyldwood

Sounds like Post Traumatic Stress

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/post-traumatic-stress-disorder.htm

ectoraige

First, I'm glad your child is okay. What you're describing is a perfectly normal response to a highly stressful situation. Stress is a normal reaction to an abnormal event. Believing your child is about to die is obviously a very traumatic experience and so it is almost to be expected to have reactions in the aftermath while you're still coming to terms with what you witnessed.

People react in different ways, but to feel like the world is a bit strange, unreal, or unfamiliar is a common reaction. A general numbness or sense of detachment is also very common. Some people can also develop amnesia surrounding the event, being unable to recall details of the incident. Increased anxiety is very normal, and will be associated with having trouble sleeping, irritable, restless, or having poor concentration. Having flashbacks is also to be expected, and as a

You should expect your wife may also exhibit symptoms such as this. Generally thouthe symptoms shouldn't persist more than four to six weeks, you should expect things to have settled down within six weeks. Be sure to speak openly with your wife about this as she may also be having trouble, and if your anxiety persists then be sure to go back to your GP and seek further help/counselling.

ectoraige

Wyldwood wrote: »

Sounds like Post Traumatic Stress

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/post-traumatic-stress-disorder.htm

OP, there's useful information there, but as it's only two weeks since the event, don't get too anxious over labelling yourself - pay particular attention to the section contrasting PTSD and a normal response to trauma.

A normal response to trauma becomes PTSD when you become stuck

What you've described is perfectly normal - but it should fade in the near future.

tom_tarbucket

great replies all. kinda putting me at ease. Thanks very much all, any more thoughts very welcome.

tom_tarbucket

ectoraige wrote: »

First, I'm glad your child is okay. What you're describing is a perfectly normal response to a highly stressful situation. Stress is a normal reaction to an abnormal event. Believing your child is about to die is obviously a very traumatic experience and so it is almost to be expected to have reactions in the aftermath while you're still coming to terms with what you witnessed.

People react in different ways, but to feel like the world is a bit strange, unreal, or unfamiliar is a common reaction. A general numbness or sense of detachment is also very common. Some people can also develop amnesia surrounding the event, being unable to recall details of the incident. Increased anxiety is very normal, and will be associated with having trouble sleeping, irritable, restless, or having poor concentration. Having flashbacks is also to be expected, and as a

You should expect your wife may also exhibit symptoms such as this. Generally thouthe symptoms shouldn't persist more than four to six weeks, you should expect things to have settled down within six weeks. Be sure to speak openly with your wife about this as she may also be having trouble, and if your anxiety persists then be sure to go back to your GP and seek further help/counselling.

thanks for taking time out to write that.

It's just the heart thing is freaking me out, one minute I think it's about to stop, the next I think it's hopping out of me and the next I think it's missing a beat or something. It's very disconcerting.

But doctor checked it once and I insisted to do again, and she said all ok.

tom_tarbucket

any more comments......

HazeyJane

Hi! I could write the book on parental trauma resulting from febrile seizures, so I hope I can help you a bit. My boy had his first seizure almost exactly a year ago when he was 10 months old. It was extremely traumatic for everyone - including paramedics and hospital personnel. We came so close to losing him. He has had 7 seizures in total in the year since - none nearly as bad as the first but all traumatic in their own way. We have to carry vials of midazolam (a sedative) with him at all times. He is now on anti-seizure meds (not recommended in most cases) and hasn't had a seizure in a few months so we can only really relax and begin to process things now.

Things that helped me cope:

Talking to my husband about my feelings

Focusing on how wonderful my boy is (it helps that he's miles ahead of his age group for language and cognitive skills - extra reassurance that the seizures or medication are not causing damage)

Looking after myself. For me this is running regularly, daily mindfulness, weekly yoga classes, taking opportunities to socialise outside of my mammy friends. Getting enough sleep. Breathing exercises or going for a walk when anxiety hits.

We worried a lot about what would happen if our boy had a seizure during the night. We now part time co-sleep (bring him into our bed at whatever stage he wakes first). This has really helped us relax and sleep at night, particularly when he's had a cold or been off form.

I've continued to breastfeed my boy when I otherwise might have weaned earlier. It helps me feel connected to him and I'm giving his immune system the best chance to fight off the bugs causing the temps and seizures. It was also amazing when he was in hospital and the oxytocin has helped keep me calm [sorry this isn't an option for you ;-)]

Reminding ourselves constantly that the seizures look way scarier than they are, that there are no known deaths from febrile seizures and that they will grow out of them.

Having great reliable childcare. My boy's creche is wonderful and it helps enormously being able to relax and not worry about him when he's there.

A few other thoughts:

Really look after yourself and your partner. Mind each other. Parental anxiety is by far the worst effect of febrile seizures.

Don't freak out about temps of sniffles or infections. As far as I have researched, no amount of temp management can prevent seizures in kids who are prone to them. Similarly, you can take sensible precautions about hand washing and avoiding obviously sick people but you'll never prevent illness.

Finally, enjoy your child! Time really does go so quickly. Don't let this trauma or ongoing anxieties define your relationship. Seek help if you need it.

I hope this helps x

_Brian

Time will help.
Few years ago when our daughter was five she had a severe abdominal Migrane attack.
The symptoms appeared like a stroke. Loss of feeling and use of limbs, tingling numbness in face and tongue, slurred speech one eye only partially opening.
The episode lasted maybe 45 minutes but after 20 we were sure she was having a stroke and would suffer permanent damage. We were on phone to pare docs and they wanted me to leave the house and get a defibrillator as we may need it. It was too far away so bundled her onto car and met ambulance on way to us to save time.

Few days in hospital and all was good thank god, she's healthy as a horse now and has only had one similar episode.

But for weeks afterwards we both suffered similar to what you describe. My GP said it was normal and would pass, just try hard to get bak to a normal routine.

Rosy Posy

I'm so sorry that you had this experience, op. Maybe a way to empower yourself would be to take an infant and child first aid course so that you would feel more confident in dealing with an emergency situation. You might never need it but the knowledge that you have the training might make you feel more secure? I hope you and your family stay well.

tom_tarbucket

HazeyJane wrote: »

Hi! I could write the book on parental trauma resulting from febrile seizures, so I hope I can help you a bit. My boy had his first seizure almost exactly a year ago when he was 10 months old. It was extremely traumatic for everyone - including paramedics and hospital personnel. We came so close to losing him. He has had 7 seizures in total in the year since - none nearly as bad as the first but all traumatic in their own way. We have to carry vials of midazolam (a sedative) with him at all times. He is now on anti-seizure meds (not recommended in most cases) and hasn't had a seizure in a few months so we can only really relax and begin to process things now.

Things that helped me cope:

Talking to my husband about my feelings

Focusing on how wonderful my boy is (it helps that he's miles ahead of his age group for language and cognitive skills - extra reassurance that the seizures or medication are not causing damage)

Looking after myself. For me this is running regularly, daily mindfulness, weekly yoga classes, taking opportunities to socialise outside of my mammy friends. Getting enough sleep. Breathing exercises or going for a walk when anxiety hits.

We worried a lot about what would happen if our boy had a seizure during the night. We now part time co-sleep (bring him into our bed at whatever stage he wakes first). This has really helped us relax and sleep at night, particularly when he's had a cold or been off form.

I've continued to breastfeed my boy when I otherwise might have weaned earlier. It helps me feel connected to him and I'm giving his immune system the best chance to fight off the bugs causing the temps and seizures. It was also amazing when he was in hospital and the oxytocin has helped keep me calm [sorry this isn't an option for you ;-)]

Reminding ourselves constantly that the seizures look way scarier than they are, that there are no known deaths from febrile seizures and that they will grow out of them.

Having great reliable childcare. My boy's creche is wonderful and it helps enormously being able to relax and not worry about him when he's there.

A few other thoughts:

Really look after yourself and your partner. Mind each other. Parental anxiety is by far the worst effect of febrile seizures.

Don't freak out about temps of sniffles or infections. As far as I have researched, no amount of temp management can prevent seizures in kids who are prone to them. Similarly, you can take sensible precautions about hand washing and avoiding obviously sick people but you'll never prevent illness.

Finally, enjoy your child! Time really does go so quickly. Don't let this trauma or ongoing anxieties define your relationship. Seek help if you need it.

I hope this helps x

thanks hazey Jane, excellent post

tom_tarbucket

_Brian wrote: »

Time will help.
Few years ago when our daughter was five she had a severe abdominal Migrane attack.
The symptoms appeared like a stroke. Loss of feeling and use of limbs, tingling numbness in face and tongue, slurred speech one eye only partially opening.
The episode lasted maybe 45 minutes but after 20 we were sure she was having a stroke and would suffer permanent damage. We were on phone to pare docs and they wanted me to leave the house and get a defibrillator as we may need it. It was too far away so bundled her onto car and met ambulance on way to us to save time.

Few days in hospital and all was good thank god, she's healthy as a horse now and has only had one similar episode.

But for weeks afterwards we both suffered similar to what you describe. My GP said it was normal and would pass, just try hard to get bak to a normal routine.

thanks Brian. good to hear your daughter is healthy. yeah, I think the key is getting the routine back again, like with Christmas and all, I am not in work and have way too much time thinking about things.

hopefully when I get back to work, my mind will have other things to think about ; )

supposedly this can last for 4-6 weeks and from what I read if it goes beyond this time, I will need to re visit the gp...............time is a healer and all that.

Did your heart feel any way like mine ?

Mickery

Hi Tom,

I'm glad to hear your kid is doing better

I can relate. I had a similar experience a couple of years ago after getting a fright like that.

I now know I was suffering from anxiety and panic attacks.

Symptoms can vary. My first one happened a few hours after the incident. I thought I was having a heart attack or a stroke as the symptoms can really freak you out (numbness in the face and limbs, tightness and pressure on the chest and heart, palpitations, dizziness and spaced-out feelings etc.).

The first few weeks were horrible and I was extremely sensitive to my heartbeat. I was waking at night with the feeling that my heart was about to jump out of my chest. My heartbeat seemed very irregular also (fast beats followed by
very slow beats).

My advice would be to get checked out by your doctor anyway for peace of mind.

Initially I didn't perceive them as "attacks" as it seemed to be non-stop and I had no idea that I could control them. My attacks grew less frequent over time.

The most important thing for me was learning that you can control the symptoms by slowing down and regulating your breathing.

I was losing too much carbon dioxide by breathing too fast, this caused the numbness.

The attack then passed in 20 minutes or so. I could function fairly normally even during attacks which seemed to just pop out of the blue. I often had no idea what was triggering the episodes.

The other thing I learned was that I had been overly focused on and concerned with my heartbeat, basically freaking myself out.

I'm starting to feel "weird" just typing this but I know it's not dangerous.

I found that giving up caffeine, alcohol and heavy gym sessions for a month or two helped, as these triggered the focus on my heartbeat which would spiral into an attack of my own making.

All symptoms disappeared in time but I still have the very odd, seemingly random episode which doesn't bother me at all. I just get on with whatever I'm doing.

I hope this helps you.

tom_tarbucket

Mickery wrote: »

Hi Tom,

I'm glad to hear your kid is doing better

I can relate. I had a similar experience a couple of years ago after getting a fright like that.

I now know I was suffering from anxiety and panic attacks.

Symptoms can vary. My first one happened a few hours after the incident. I thought I was having a heart attack or a stroke as the symptoms can really freak you out (numbness in the face and limbs, tightness and pressure on the chest and heart, palpitations, dizziness and spaced-out feelings etc.).

The first few weeks were horrible and I was extremely sensitive to my heartbeat. I was waking at night with the feeling that my heart was about to jump out of my chest. My heartbeat seemed very irregular also (fast beats followed by
very slow beats).

My advice would be to get checked out by your doctor anyway for peace of mind.

Initially I didn't perceive them as "attacks" as it seemed to be non-stop and I had no idea that I could control them. My attacks grew less frequent over time.

The most important thing for me was learning that you can control the symptoms by slowing down and regulating your breathing.

I was losing too much carbon dioxide by breathing too fast, this caused the numbness.

The attack then passed in 20 minutes or so. I could function fairly normally even during attacks which seemed to just pop out of the blue. I often had no idea what was triggering the episodes.

The other thing I learned was that I had been overly focused on and concerned with my heartbeat, basically freaking myself out.

I'm starting to feel "weird" just typing this but I know it's not dangerous.

I found that giving up caffeine, alcohol and heavy gym sessions for a month or two helped, as these triggered the focus on my heartbeat which would spiral into an attack of my own making.

All symptoms disappeared in time but I still have the very odd, seemingly random episode which doesn't bother me at all. I just get on with whatever I'm doing.

I hope this helps you.

mickery. it does indeed help me. good to know im not alone.

what you explain is in parts very similar to mine except I don't really get panic attacks as such.

Thanks a million for taking the time to write the reply.

Hunter gatherer

Great advice and information. A stressful situation like that has triggered these anxiety attacks. I have two friends who have described their experiences with anxiety attacks and your symptoms sound similar. People will deal with it differently (some may find medication helps, others meditation) It may simply take time. Glad to hear your child is okay now.