The best/worst thing your body has done

jockeyboard

Just been reading the sleep paralylis thread and got me thinking how your body can do amazing/horrible things and i wanted to share the best and worst ways my body has served me-warning the first example dosnt make for pretty reading....

The worst thing my body has done/has happened my body is this,
I was badly and suddenly without warning deeply betrayed by somebody extremly close to me. When i discovered this betrayal something very strange happened that i never want to experience again. I felt white hot rage, i got tunnel vision and i attacked the person, violently and visciously. I could not control my anger and was stronger then i ever was. Afterwards i couldnt remember exactly what had happened but had flashes of myself.
I am not trying to justify myself or violence. I am telling the story of when i lost control of myself. I dont condone violence of any kind. I had a 'nervous breakdown' straight after this event, brought on or triggered by it.

The best thing my body has ever done was enable me to give birth without pain relief. (i am not judging people who have sections, epidurals or whatever they choose/need and i respect/advocate womens choice regarding childbirth) I found the experience extremly empowering and fufilling. It gave me confidence in my body and left me amazed at the age old process and good old mother nature.
So boardsies what ways did your body serve you well or not.

Kevin McCloud

Constipation and a big dump.

Straylight

Best thing my body has ever done is get itself home after a hard night out without any assistance from me whatsoever.

Links234

My body is a bit.. weird. especially when it comes to sleep. I suffer from insomnia, had sleep paralysis as a child, but perhaps the weirdest is that I got the Jimmy legs! :eek: Serious, nasty Jimmy legs. Once I hit the bed, it just keeps going. I can be asleep, and have a spasm in a leg that wakes me right up. it's kinda ****ed up

The Backwards Man

Got me thirty seven years on this planet without ballsing up too much. If I don't start repaying the favour soon there may be repercussions though

tritium

Worst -nearly kill me out of the blue
Best -get me through that and a few other things

madmaggie

It's gotten me to the half ton without too much bother, very appreciative!

Ruu

Enabled me to run multiple marathons every year. Over 6000 running miles on the clock in about 5 years. No injuries, will keep on truckin' until it is time to pay the piper.

Cee-Jay-Cee

The best thing my body/mind ever done was as follows:

18yrs old and went to Munich to work for the summer, arrived that day with 2 friends and went to our pre-arranged accommodation, threw my bag in the room and headed out on the beer with my two friends. We went to the Hoffbrauhaus (sp) and started drinking Mass glasses of beer (they held 2 pints). I was what you'd call a useless drinker, 2 pints and I was pissed as a fart, 3 and is be near unconscious. Anyway I had 5 or 6 mass glasses and have absolutely no recollection of the end of the night but I somehow managed to find my way across the city to my accommodation. No big deal you'd think as my 2 friends brought me but no, I woke up alone (we were all sharing a room) I had no key to get in so someone let me in. The previous evening we travelled by underground to the Hoffbrauhaus but the trains stop at around midnight and it would have been well after that when I left. I didn't havebthe address written down anywhere nor did I know it as one of the others had it. When the two other arrived home later that morning, they told me I was completely fcuked the night before and had gone to the jacks but never came back. They went to look for me but couldn't find me so continued on drinking and went to a club afterwards. To this day I have no idea how I got home that night, it actually seems impossible as I couldn't even have asked for directions and walked as I didn't know the address nor did I know how to walk to the place as we arrived when it was dark and so I couldn't even have picked out landmarks. But my brain somehow managed to look after stupid drunken me and get me home.

Degag

Multiple pints of Guinness = You can guess the rest.

beks101

Best: Ran a marathon. Rode on a wave of adrenalin for about a week after that.
Or: recovered from an eating disorder. Took a few years but bounced right back like no-one's business. Fair play, body!

Worst: Hands down, the panic attacks. Jesus, the panic attacks.

Schwiiing

I've had a tilted pelvis for a few years without realising it. It has ****ed my back up probably for life. Anyone know a fix for it?

pharmaton

wait, twelve posts in and no one has mentioned sex yet? (I'll go with that for best and worst for simplicity)

Littlekittylou

Schwiiing wrote: »

I've had a tilted pelvis for a few years without realising it. It has ****ed my back up probably for life. Anyone know a fix for it?

• Lengthened (weak) hamstrings
• Lengthened (weak) abdominals
• Lengthened (weak) glutes
• Shortened (tight) erector spinae
• Shortened (tight) hip flexors

What will help is glute bridges every kind of plank exercise and lunges to stretch the glutes plus stop sitting for so long.


Yoga and ballet would be great.

TheBeardedLady

Worst? Tensing up from stress.


Best: walking from Saint Jean Pied de la Port in France to Santiago in Spain this Summer. 790 kms or thereabouts. Didn't take even one bus. My body didn't let me down once.

jaja321

Schwiiing wrote: »

I've had a tilted pelvis for a few years without realising it. It has ****ed my back up probably for life. Anyone know a fix for it?

Pilates would help I reckon. It's great for realignment and strengthening your back.

For Forks Sake

Schwiiing wrote: »

I've had a tilted pelvis for a few years without realising it. It has ****ed my back up probably for life. Anyone know a fix for it?

Some flat 7up will sort that right out.

Gongoozler

jaja321 wrote: »

Pilates would help I reckon. It's great for realignment and strengthening your back.

So I'm the only one who thought this is a piss take given the username?

Worst would be between getting back spasms and suddenly developing an allergy to the pill. Never had any allergies before so it was kinda scary.

Schwiiing

Gongoozler wrote: »

So I'm the only one who thought this is a piss take given the username?

Worst would be between getting back spasms and suddenly developing an allergy to the pill. Never had any allergies before so it was kinda scary.

This took me a while .

But it's a legit complaint. According to a quick google it's muscles in my thighs that have gone tight and they are pulling me forward.

The stretch to fix it though is difficult to get right :mad:.

Turtyturd

Worst is definitely the horrible leg cramps in the middle of the night.

ibarelycare

Not sure about the worst, but the best was being able to help save my brother's life by donating my bone marrow to him when he had leukemia. 12 years ago now and he's flying

Karl Stein

Worstest: 6 weeks on codeine for spirit-crushing back pain. Couldn't even stand up.

Bestest: Playing soccer. It gives me great joy.

Irishcrx

Worst thing? - Uncontrolable rage at times , runs in the family. Much worst when I was younger but have it under control now and am generally very calm but...it is still there and can get me in trouble at times can be a bit scary, especially around people who don't know me very well.

Best thing? - Uncontrolable rage at times , runs in the family. That somehow increases my very minimal frame and strength to hulk like levels and allows me to lift people twice my size off the ground , got me out a few sticky situations.

ShowMeTheCash

Best: An orgasm so intense I fainted.
Worst: Waking up from orgasm to find I lost control of my bowels.

castletownman

Best: Got me through major heart surgery as a baby to generally be the picture of good health ever since.

Worst: Appearing to have a high threshold for alcohol. While it has meant I have built up a high enough tolerance level over the years, I just know it's doing more harm than good in the long-run.

BeerWolf

My body has attacked me with a severe case of incredibly painful cramping of the calf... FU body!

Larbre34

BeerWolf wrote: »

My body has attacked me with a severe case of incredibly painful cramping of the calf... FU body!

That would be drink induced. It is one of the worse things the body than do alright, waking up with a hangover in your head to feel your calfs cramping like stab wounds because you are so dehydrated.


The best thing my body has done for me? Made full use of an extended and unprotected first time session of fun with someone called Elaine in our teenage years, in her house when the rest of her family were on holiday. The body got a pat on the head that day.

ash23

Best:growing a perfectly formed little person
Worst: Thinking my nervous system is an intruder and getting my immume system to attack it now and then (MS)

ordinary_girl

Worst: It's a toss up between when I got horrific food poisoning and could barely stand and got really painful shivers, or when I got a tooth ache so bad I couldn't eat or sleep for about a week.

Best: I can walk fairly long distances, sometimes spontaneously, and my feet don't hurt the following day and I generally don't get out of breath. I wasn't so good at it a few years ago, but now my body is pretty dependable.

Schwiiing

Worst: Psoriasis, Dyspraxia, Carpet of body hair, my face, my brain, my personality or lack thereof.

Best: Not much.

eviltwin

Best: Growing two people

Worst: My brain not working properly resulting in depression

Tonyandthewhale

Worst: I get woeful bad hiccups on a far too regular basis. Always terrified that they won't stop and I'll be hiccuping for life.

Best: I like how my body can just keep going and going. Cycling from Preston in the North of England down to Falmouth in the far Southwest over the course of one winter's day and night was pretty good. I was pretty surprised that it didn't just pack-in at any point. Arrived at my destination the morning after I set off, took a nap for about an hour in the afternoon and was out dancing in a club til all hours that night.

waffleman

ShowMeTheCash wrote: »

Best: An orgasm so intense I fainted.
Worst: Waking up from orgasm to find I lost control of my bowels.

You never told me this! Who did ye **** the bed beside? lolz

Lau2976

Worst: Periods and food poisoning so bad I passed out on my bathroom floor from lack of fluids and woke up hours later in the e.r. Also Randomly stripping in my sleep when I'm stressed.

Best: Not dying yet.

Grayson

Worst was a lung collapse

best was meningitis, whooping cough & pneumonia at once when i was a kid. Any physical body which gets through that with no major side effects is fecking awesome.

Also, I don't get altitude sickness and for some reason insects never bite me. they're little things but you really appreciate them at the time.

Pumpkinseeds

Worst: Soul destroyingly painful chronic hideous disease that involves my glands eating me from the inside, gradually tearing it's way out through my skin and totally destroying my life and career.

Best: Nothing.

Penny Tration

Best thing my body has ever done - not gotten pregnant.

Worst - that time I went on the drink and woke up in hospital.

kowloon

Schwiiing wrote: »

I've had a tilted pelvis for a few years without realising it. It has ****ed my back up probably for life. Anyone know a fix for it?

I thought what Gongoozler said.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szkgylvDYA4

Sam Hain

Worst: Getting my balls caught in a mouse trap
Best: Releasing my balls from the mouse trap

zyanya

Best - REALLY bad blows and never a broken bone. I sometimes think my bones are made of rubber

Worst - I have keratoconus... other than that... I'm super allergic to peach and when I eat even an accidental bit, I swell up and ennd up feeling like the Olmeca head:

Gael23

Worst: Bowels decided to stop working properly and resulting constipation was so bad it took nearly 3 months to clear fully.

lazygal

Best-gestated and birthed two children, and breastfed them afterwards
Worst-gestated and birthed two children, and breastfed them afterwards

heldel00

Worst: adult acne. (It gets me so down I just can't think of a best :mad:)

Worst: Nearly died from the very worst strain of meningitis B, I went from a slight headache to critically ill in less than hours and am only still here thanks to the prompt actions of my brother. I remember thinking I was slipping away and wanting to so the pain would stop. A year later I unluckily got another strain of meningitis and was quite ill, but not life threateningly so.

Best: Apart from surviving meningitis, the physical euphoria the human body is capable of is amazing.

heldel00

^^^ was the second strain related to the first?

Mister Vain

Worst: My lung decided to collapse for no apparent reason - spontaneous pneumothorax. It happened to me twice in 6 months. It was awful.

Best: I managed to climax twice with a woman in the space of an hour.

heldel00

heldel00 wrote: »

^^^ was the second strain related to the first?

No, I was just extremely unlucky.

heldel00

Candie wrote: »

No, I was just extremely unlucky.

Unbelievable! You would prob have better odds of winning lotto! Were doctors dumbfounded?

heldel00

heldel00 wrote: »

Unbelievable! You would prob have better odds of winning lotto! Were doctors dumbfounded?

The second strain was quite common, but having it after the meng B is unusual but not unheard of.

bop1977

Best: being a man
Worst: Man flu.

beks101

heldel00 wrote: »

Worst: adult acne. (It gets me so down I just can't think of a best :mad:)

I think this is a classic case of the body just being a big giant cnut for no apparent reason. Just because it can.

I suffered with terrible skin for years, despite having a perfectly clean diet and healthy lifestyle and using soap-free oil-free products etc and not doing the things that my peers around me did (who had beautifully clear skin) such as binge drinking and smoking and eating shyte and never exercising.

Took me several years of antibiotics, two courses of accutane and thousands of pounds worth of products and treatments before there was any give with my skin, and even at that - time of the month or forgetting to take my makeup off before bed and BAM, breakouts everywhere.

Adult acne is a fcuking dickhead.
If it were a person it would be Katie Hopkins.
Arsehole for the sake of being an arsehole.