Bringing your girlfriend to a nightclub

Mister Vain

Is this something any of you guys do much? My gf has been asking me to go clubbing with her lately. I went with her a couple of times but didn't enjoy it much. TBH, the only reason I ever went clubbing was to meet women. It kind of seems pointless now.

Wibbs

Eh yea. In the past(oldfart reporting), I've often gone clubbing with girlfriends and why not? And I'm saying that as a man who because of coordination normally found in a three legged horse with St Vitus dance would be best served avoiding the dance floor. Then again I never went to clubs to "pull", so maybe that's it? I went for the craic with mates and the drink after the pub turfed me out(though if I'm being completely honest for a bit of a sideways look at the ladies and nada wrong with that I say).

Putins Future Assassin

You could always suggest looking for a suitable threesome participant. It boggles my mind that so many men have never asked their girlfriends/wives for a three some with another woman.

Mister Vain

Putins Future Assassin wrote: »

You could always suggest looking for a suitable threesome participant. It boggles my mind that so many men have never asked their girlfriends/wives for a three some with another woman.

Ye know with a few drinks on me I might just ask her that.

Wibbs

Putins Future Assassin, that's your first post(Like I believe that)? Take a week off to bone up on the charter and general and obvious guidelines on posting in this forum.

Pawwed Rig

Wibbs wrote: »

I've often gone clubbing with girlfriends and why not?

I always hated night clubs. So glad that phase of my life is over

enda1

Mister Vain wrote: »

Is this something any of you guys do much? My gf has been asking me to go clubbing with her lately. I went with her a couple of times but didn't enjoy it much. TBH, the only reason I ever went clubbing was to meet women. It kind of seems pointless now.

Something she likes doing and something you don't. Treat it the same as any other occasion where you have a difference of opinion.

2Mad2BeMad

I went with mine twice hated eh. Couldnt enjoy myself she was just constantly around me.Only go with my own mates now and she goes with hers.

Well I guess the OP is just a verification of what we knew already - what you get out of anything will depend on what you go into it hoping to get from it. If all night clubs are to you are an area to meet women - and you have no longer an interest in meeting women - then of course it is "pointless" to go there now.

Clearly however other people who attend such places do so under a different set of priorities - and therefore are likely to find different points and benefits of it.

As for taking girlfriends there - I can not think of a single reason why not. And I did try.

skallywag

If you are going with just your girlfriend then it can potentially end up a right pain if she likes to dance and you don't.

lazybones32

Yeah. We often hit the club together but drift off with friends and find our way back together when we wanted some shifting. Can be annoying to see other fella's chatting her up and herself loving the attention.

Glebee

Last time I was in a night club I got a bottle thrown at me as the girlfriend at the time found out I was seeing somebody else. Not very nice I know,, but it was along time ago.

Mister Vain

lazybones32 wrote: »

Can be annoying to see other fella's chatting her up and herself loving the attention.

Yeah that's another thing. I'd rather just go to the pub where there's less of that.

Shanotheslayer

skallywag wrote: »

If you are going with just your girlfriend then it can potentially end up a right pain if she likes to dance and you don't.

Situation with my girlfriend. I prefer going with even a small group that way I can chill and sit down with 1 or 2 and she can have a little boogie

laoch na mona

ya but as part of a group, I get a great laugh out of pointing out lads eyeing her up shes oblivious to it, but my preference pubs they're quieter and with less bad music

jezzer

I never liked going to nightclubs with the missus, i always felt i had to mind her and never enjoyed it, you know women with handbags and high heels and all that hassle, as you say nightclubs are for pulling so a bit pointless when you have a gf, if i am going to a nightclub i prefer to go with a few mates and just look after myself

smcgiff

Bringing Coal to Newcastle, Snow to the North Pole, Sand to Arabia...

But, yeah - the missus likes to go.

mountsky

Late bars are much better!

smcgiff

mountsky wrote: »

Late bars are much better!

But very different.

Mister Vain

smcgiff wrote: »

Bringing Coal to Newcastle, Snow to the North Pole, Sand to Arabia...

There's coal in Newcastle? You learn something everyday.

smcgiff

Mister Vain wrote: »

There's coal in Newcastle? You learn something everyday.

Do you not remember Andy? :pac:

deadybai

Didn't know it was normal not to bring the woman to a night club. Makes sense when you think about it. Nightclubs are sheet anyways. Didn't even like them when I was single

jezzer

yea niteclubs are a bit sh*te, i used to think i liked them but i cant stand them now, too loud, you lose all your mates inside, too crowded, every class of a yahoo is p*ssed, the bar is too busy, the drink is s*ite, glad i dont go to any now, its amazing how your life changes, once, i wouldnt dream of staying in on a saturday night now i love it, would others be the same? i'm in my 30's

deadybai

jezzer wrote: »

yea niteclubs are a bit sh*te, i used to think i liked them but i cant stand them now, too loud, you lose all your mates inside, too crowded, every class of a yahoo is p*ssed, the bar is too busy, the drink is s*ite, glad i dont go to any now, its amazing how your life changes, once, i wouldnt dream of staying in on a saturday night now i love it, would others be the same? i'm in my 30's

Im 21 and while I do prefer a a good pub with a daycent band, I'd prefer to stay in and not drink than go to a sh11ty nightlub

Pawwed Rig

jezzer wrote: »

its amazing how your life changes, once, i wouldnt dream of staying in on a saturday night now i love it, would others be the same? i'm in my 30's

Yep. That is what age does to you. Not willing to sacrifice my Sunday for a wild one on Saturday. Would rather a Chinese, a DVD and a couple of bottles of Tyskie

Earl Turner

If you bring your girl to a nightclub you better stay sober and watch her like a hawk.

Saipanne

I wouldn't go out with a woman who likes nightclubs.

So no. Its not a problem.

Saipanne

lazybones32 wrote: »

Can be annoying to see other fella's chatting her up and herself loving the attention.

That's dumpable behaviour, for me.

Pawwed Rig

Earl Turner wrote: »

If you bring your girl to a nightclub you better stay sober and watch her like a hawk.

That probably depends more on the individual girl I would have thought. If you feel like you have to watch her like a hawk there is not much trust going on there

Earl Turner

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

That probably depends more on the individual girl I would have thought. If you feel like you have to watch her like a hawk there is not much trust going on there

Well most of the time you can trust them but you still better keep an eye on them. What I hate is when they hand their numbers out to some guy they met that night. Very disrespectful.

smcgiff

Earl Turner wrote: »

What I hate is when they hand their numbers out to some guy they met that night. Very disrespectful.

That's a very Gentlemen's Club way of putting it.

Saipanne

Earl Turner wrote: »

Well most of the time you can trust them but you still better keep an eye on them. What I hate is when they hand their numbers out to some guy they met that night. Very disrespectful.

Eh, you put up with that?

BlatentCheek

TBH going to the nightclub with your girlfriend and/or a group of girls your friends with can actually be good craic. It takes the single lads hobbesian war of all against all feel out of the nightclub and makes it a much more pleasant place to be.
It goes without saying that anyone of any gender seeing their partner entertaining blatant come-ons in front of them, much less giving out their number, should chuck that person pronto.

Saipanne

smcgiff wrote: »

That's a very Gentlemen's Club way of putting it.

He's right, though. Its not respectful of someone's feelings. I would never do that to my girlfriend, off flirting with other women right in front if her. I have way too much respect for her feelings.

Earl Turner

Earl Turner wrote: »

If you bring your girl to a nightclub you better stay sober and watch her like a hawk.

Or - you know - girls can look after themselves without you ruining your own night or acting like a predatory bird.

Mister Vain

Saipanne wrote: »

I wouldn't go out with a woman who likes nightclubs.

Even if she was gorgeous with a great personality and just generally a great catch?

Saipanne

Mister Vain wrote: »

Even if she was gorgeous with a great personality and just generally a great catch?

Ugh, she'd want to be something special. ;-)

smcgiff

Saipanne wrote: »

He's right, though. Its not respectful of someone's feelings. I would never do that to my girlfriend, off flirting with other women right in front if her. I have way too much respect for her feelings.

I meant he was faaaaaaaaar too genteel in his descripton of what it was.

Not taking off your glove when shaking someone's hand is disrespectful. Handing out your phone number while with someone else is knackerish.

Pawwed Rig

Earl Turner wrote: »

Well most of the time you can trust them but you still better keep an eye on them. What I hate is when they hand their numbers out to some guy they met that night. Very disrespectful.

Never happened to me tbh and if it is happening to you I would suggest that maybe you are not with the right girl. That is not normal behaviour; Your post makes it seem like you think it is. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

Earl Turner

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Never happened to me tbh and if it is happening to you I would suggest that maybe you are not with the right girl. That is not normal behaviour; Your post makes it seem like you think it is. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

Happens quite a lot to me unfortunately. The problem is these girls tend to be very out going and friendly, so when they're out they get chatting to people. Sometimes they'll meet a guy and get chatting. And that doesn't even bother me too much to be honest, I mean we're talking about women here, they thrive on attention.

The problem arises when he asks for her number and she gives it to him. She'll claim she's only doing it out of politeness. I've met girls who seem to think the men they meet on a night out actually don't want to get into their pants!

Anyway I've been called a controlling arsehole for telling them not to do it. Maybe it's just the girls I meet.

Earl Turner

Deleted User wrote: »

Or - you know - girls can look after themselves without you ruining your own night or acting like a predatory bird.

If she's a teetotaler sure. I've known girls to get with other guys while in the club with their boyfriends.

Wibbs

Earl Turner wrote: »

Maybe it's just the girls I meet.

I'd reckon it is ET and this is coming from a man who was the bloody poster boy for preselecting nutbags and narcissists at one point in my life. Entirely my fault. "Bypass sound woman for fcuking nutter, cos I think I can cure them" gobshíte I was. Seriously man, if your girlfriend is exchanging deets with some randomer bloke in the pub/niteclub, I'd advise scraping her off with extreme prejudice.

That's just not on. It's woefully bad mannered and is treating you like the "current boyfriend, but open to suggestions". Sod that crap Ted. Basically she's either a fool or a tool, there's really no other explanation. And again, even though I preselected nutbags and narcissists back in the day and dodgy as it sometimes got, I never had someone pull that guff on me. Even back then I would have told them to sod off. And it's got eff all to do with her being her or some other BS explanation. Reverse the scenario and have you getting random women's deets in a club and see how that goes down. The vast majority of men and women would be calling shenanigans on that crap.

Wibbs

Earl Turner wrote: »

If she's a teetotaler sure. I've known girls to get with other guys while in the club with their boyfriends.

So have I ET. Indeed at one phase in my life I was the "other guy" quite often. And even then I was thinking "disloyal slapper, only good for fun and frolics and no more than that". Most "other guys" who are in that position anyway regularly in my experience think similarly. Look if anyone is willing to drop a partner, especially if said partner is in the same environment, then you know what you're dealing with. You do NOT get emotionally involved. Sadly some men(and women) do. Daft.

Earl Turner

Wibbs wrote: »

I'd reckon it is ET and this is coming from a man who was the bloody poster boy for preselecting nutbags and narcissists at one point in my life. Entirely my fault. "Bypass sound woman for fcuking nutter, cos I think I can cure them" gobshíte I was. Seriously man, if your girlfriend is exchanging deets with some randomer bloke in the pub/niteclub, I'd advise scraping her off with extreme prejudice.

That's just not on. It's woefully bad mannered and is treating you like the "current boyfriend, but open to suggestions". Sod that crap Ted. Basically she's either a fool or a tool, there's really no other explanation. And again, even though I preselected nutbags and narcissists back in the day and dodgy as it sometimes got, I never had someone pull that guff on me. Even back then I would have told them to sod off. And it's got eff all to do with her being her or some other BS explanation. Reverse the scenario and have you getting random women's deets in a club and see how that goes down. The vast majority of men and women would be calling shenanigans on that crap.

You're definitely right. But I've been called paranoid for telling them not to do it. Anyway I have zero tolerance for that kind of bs these days.

Earl Turner

Wibbs wrote: »

So have I ET. Indeed at one phase in my life I was the "other guy" quite often. And even then I was thinking "disloyal slapper, only good for fun and frolics and no more than that". Most "other guys" who are in that position anyway regularly in my experience think similarly. Look if anyone is willing to drop a partner, especially if said partner is in the same environment, then you know what you're dealing with. You do NOT get emotionally involved. Sadly some men(and women) do. Daft.

Well alcohol is always thrown out as an excuse but really, if a girl is willing to do that she needs to be dropped immediately.

Earl Turner

Earl Turner wrote: »

If she's a teetotaler sure. I've known girls to get with other guys while in the club with their boyfriends.

Thats their problem. I see little to no reason to extrapolate that into generalizations or any of the other inferences you draw from it. "maybe it is just the girls I meet" is more likely to be RIGHT on the money.

If you feel the need to stay entirely sober and act like a bird of prey stalker to your partner - just because you are in a night club - then as someone else already suggested - perhaps this is not the one for you.

Me - I have no issue whatsoever with being in a club with my girlfriends - them going to clubs alone without me - being sober or drunk - or any of that. My trust in them is complete. I hope you find the same in life.

Saipanne

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Thats their problem. I see little to no reason to extrapolate that into generalizations or any of the other inferences you draw from it. "maybe it is just the girls I meet" is more likely to be RIGHT on the money.

If you feel the need to stay entirely sober and act like a bird of prey stalker to your partner - just because you are in a night club - then as someone else already suggested - perhaps this is not the one for you.

Me - I have no issue whatsoever with being in a club with my girlfriends - them going to clubs alone without me - being sober or drunk - or any of that. My trust in them is complete. I hope you find the same in life.

But you want them to be with other people. You even suggest they do it. You've explained this before. So it's not quite the same.

Saipanne

Saipanne wrote: »

But you want them to be with other people. You even suggest they do it. You've explained this before. So it's not quite the same.

Not it is not the same - so unclear why you would even bring it up.

I am talking about actively breaking trust and engaging in activity with others that has not been sanctioned or discussed or allowed. I entirely trust this would not happen - the other user does not. That is the point.

I am talking about the claim that the only way this user can trust his girlfriend in a night club is if he himself remains entirely sober and watches her like a stalker. Because clearly the moment she gets out of sight she is going to immerse herself in all manner of debauchery. Puh-leese.

Saipanne

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Not it is not the same - so unclear why you would even bring it up.

I am talking about actively breaking trust and engaging in activity with others that has not been sanctioned or discussed or allowed. I entirely trust this would not happen - the other user does not. That is the point.

I didn't bring it up.

I was addressing your final paragraph.

Saipanne

Saipanne wrote: »

I didn't bring it up.

I was addressing your final paragraph.

Except you did bring it up - and it is a comment that is entirely unrelated to what I am actually talking about here.

I repeat the bit you simply left out: I am talking about the claim that the only way this user can trust his girlfriend in a night club is if he himself remains entirely sober and watches her like a stalker. Because clearly the moment she gets out of sight she is going to immerse herself in all manner of debauchery. Puh-leese.

Saipanne

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Except you did bring it up - and it is a comment that is entirely unrelated to what I am actually talking about here.

I repeat the bit you simply left out: I am talking about the claim that the only way this user can trust his girlfriend in a night club is if he himself remains entirely sober and watches her like a stalker. Because clearly the moment she gets out of sight she is going to immerse herself in all manner of debauchery. Puh-leese.

I just think your situation is obviously unlike the norm, and your advice can't be applicable to monogamous relationships. I'll leave it there.

as for her...

Who knows? She might be the type. Is this the one taking fellas numbers on nights out? Sounds like bad news.