When did you realise you were a non believer

jaffusmax

I was 7 or 8 and was with a group of lads whom I joined in with throwing rocks at a presbyterian church. I proudly ran home to tell mother about my great achievement. She said that she was protestant, I remember a sudden sense of WTF this stuff is complicated and ever since saw religion as something to be avoided, as for a God I was always fascinated that it was dog spelt backwards as a kid!

wretcheddomain

17 July 2006

Dave!

I didn't... Thanks for telling me

Squeedily Spooch

It never made any sense to me, but I still had scary thoughts about some tyrannical god watching what was going on inside my head as a kid, but that didn't last long. Once you drop the utterly insane belief in Christianity you're much better off. An eternal boogeyman watching over you isn't something that benefits you in any way unless you're instilled with self loathing from an early age. There's way better things to be concerning your thoughts with, like having a solid zombie escape plan.

jaffusmax

Squeedily Spooch wrote: »

It never made any sense to me, but I still had scary thoughts about some tyrannical god watching what was going on inside my head as a kid, but that didn't last long. Once you drop the utterly insane belief in Christianity you're much better off. An eternal boogeyman watching over you isn't something that benefits you in any way unless you're instilled with self loathing from an early age. There's way better things to be concerning your thoughts with, like having a solid zombie escape plan.

I had the same scary feeling about a God after reading 1984, being convicted of thought crime and sentenced to an eternal hell would mean we are all leaving in a totalitarian hamster cage for humans.

As for zombies I am a skip and a hop away from my bug out bag!!!!!

Shrap

When I knew what a believer was.

Nino Brown

When I was a kid I was crazy about dinosaurs, I had loads of books and toys, and knew all the names etc. Then in school when I was about 6 or 7 a priest was in telling us about Adam and Eve and how we all got here, and I basically called on BS on everything he said, and an argument/discussion ensued, because I knew Dinosaurs were around for hundreds of millions of years before people ever got here.
I had loads of books by really smart people on fossils and the latest technology like carbon dating, and he had one ancient book which seemed pretty far fetched to say the least, so that day me and religion decided to agree to disagree.

I will say one thing though, it wasn't very pleasant, I know my logic is a bit skewed here, but I was worried that because I didn't believe in God that I would go to hell. My parents and teachers etc were telling me this story was true, and I just didn't buy it, but these were all people I was supposed to trust and believe, and I really did try hard to believe,but just couldn't quite push all that logic and common sense down deep enough. It was hard back then but now I'm proud that even as a child I was smart enough to see through the lies and fear mongering.

mejulie805

Jeez, it wasn't until I was in/finished college, when I realised not only did I not have to be catholic, I didn't have to be anything! One of the things that annoys me about my upbringing is that I didn't know it was a choice- didn't you have to be something!?

whatdoicare

I never believed - I remember in primary school reading the stories of "The Brown Bull of Connacht", "Tir na Nog" and "The salmon of knowledge" and pretty much assuming that these supposedly real life stories like "Noahs Ark" "The nativity story"and "The story of the loaves and fishes" etc etc were pretty much the same tall tales.
I think when I was too young to know what I was supposed to be thinking about the Bible that I just assumed they were fairy tale stories and I remember much later on thinking my Nana was having a laugh with me telling me they were real stories! I'm pretty sure I had made my communion around that time - I made it not knowing what the hell it was all about, I just wanted the money! I thought making a confession was being locked in a cage (badly described confessional box by teacher)

GhostInTheRuins

I'm not sure if I ever really believed in any of it.

One thing that for some reason I always remember was when I was in baby infants or senior infants and our very religious teacher was telling us how God created the world and all that stuff. What I wanted to know was how this God came about and who made him. My teachers answer was that he was never created, he just always existed for ever and ever. Even my six-year old brain could smell that massive porkie a mile away.

I even remember when I was making my first confession I couldn't think of anything to confess, so I just made up a load of lies. Does that count as confession or a sin? :pac:

eviltwin

Don't think I ever believed, even as a child I remember thinking it was a load of rubbish. Only came out as a non believer when I turned 30 though.

waffleman

When I was old enough to realise that the reason a priest would call to my granny every week was to collect part of her pension. My granny who was on her own after granda passed on was denyin herself food and heat because a priest was takin it off her. Always from the same spot above the empty cold fireplace. Religion and "believing" wasnt for me after that.

RikuoAmero

GhostInTheRuins wrote: »

I'm not sure if I ever really believed in any of it.

One thing that for some reason I always remember was when I was in baby infants or senior infants and our very religious teacher was telling us how God created the world and all that stuff. What I wanted to know was how this God came about and who made him. My teachers answer was that he was never created, he just always existed for ever and ever. Even my six-year old brain could smell that massive porkie a mile away.

I even remember when I was making my first confession I couldn't think of anything to confess, so I just made up a load of lies. Does that count as confession or a sin? :pac:

Exact same thing with myself. I was the goody two shoes kid in the family, thus I never really did anything bad, so I always just made **** up in confession. Somehow, these priests, who had been blessed with knowledge and wisdom and the power to forgive from this great majestic god character, just didn't see through my lies. I guess being a preacher of a religion that teaches that every single human, without exception (except for the one exception where the one human was their god) is a horrible sinner from birth who can't redeem themselves kinda skews your view of humanity.

jaffusmax

waffleman wrote: »

When I was old enough to realise that the reason a priest would call to my granny every week was to collect part of her pension. My granny who was on her own after granda passed on was denyin herself food and heat because a priest was takin it off her. Always from the same spot above the empty cold fireplace. Religion and "believing" wasnt for me after that.

I assume that priest was warm and well fed!

Sounds like a modern day loan shark taking people money at the post office, instead this priest was insuring against ever lasting Hell!

RikuoAmero wrote: »

Exact same thing with myself. I was the goody two shoes kid in the family, thus I never really did anything bad, so I always just made **** up in confession.

ROFL

Exactly I used to think something was wrong with me because I Was not A Magnificent SINNER! I thought I had to get some good sins under my belt to tell the priest but I was just naturally far too nice

But I was not nice to my brother and sister once

DaisyD2

The day Mum tried to get me into Alexanders on Dorset st for my communion dress & I clamped my hands on door frame & announced "I am NOT marrying god!". I was coaxed with promise of money which turned out to be very lucrative.

My 2nd "aha" moment was being sent on an errand to convent & waiting in this austere grey room with a dial up phone & mismatched uncomfortable chairs. Nun came & got me & brought me behind the magic door & voila the most magnificent stain glass windows, carpentry, curtains & soft furnishings - real plush! I thought "ya lying toe rags", meet family in cold grey room next door & they think your vow of poverty is noble! Living here with 3square meals doesn't seem bad deal to me.

Always grateful I wasn't born earlier though because likely these "notions" would have had my family packing me off to convent or looney bin or worse (forced marriage & child bearing that came with it).

I live my life under principle of "Do No Harm", pity some of the wonderfully pious clergy I've met in my life could not do same although I will always have fond memories of Geography teacher who I felt a kinship over our love of Travel. Always felt she was one of the unfortunates forced into nunnery because she wanted to see World (& did in mission work) beyond the family farm

Saipanne

Some time before my confirmation.

branie2

Saipanne wrote: »

Some time before my confirmation.

I imagine you still made it, anyway.

Saipanne

branie2 wrote: »

I imagine you still made it, anyway.

Yes. I was a child and did what my parents told me.

PopePalpatine

I think I've told this story before, but I might as well repeat it. I declared myself an agnostic shortly after being introduced to the term aged 14. There's this other forum I frequent, and in the Opinions & Current Events section there were two threads, one titled "Do you believe in God?" and the other "Creation vs Evolution". There was this one Admin, who liked to post in bold indigo text who was quite good at de-constructing theists' and creationists' arguments, and at 16 I realised I was an atheist.

RikuoAmero

Probably like most people here, I grew up Catholic and was educated in Catholic schools. Bible stories like Abraham sacrificing Isaac never sat well with me, but up until my teens I did believe that Jesus was the Son of God who sacrificed himself for us.
Then sometime in my teens, a traumatic event occurred (I won't go into detail here for obvious reasons). Yes, if you're a theist and you read this, you will probably go "Aha! You hate God because of this bad event in your life!"
No, that event was a catalyst that caused me to start questioning more or less everything, where beforehand, I had been pretty comfortable. I rejected the concept of a god needing an organised religion with a set dogma that followers are commanded to obey under penalty of hellfire, moving away from christianity. For a while, I believed there was some sort of spiritual entity (which I dubbed Gaia) that managed life because at that time I believed that life was intelligently designed. However, I didn't worship that Gaia entity or proclaim it to have any sort of doctrine.
After a few years, I studied more and eventually abandoned the concept of divine entities entirely, once I got a job, got internet access and was exposed to the thoughts of Hitchens, Dawkins, et al. So like Thunderf00t has famously proclaimed "The Internet is where religion comes to die", that is true in at least my case.
I can't pinpoint any specific date, only provide a broad spectrum of what happened with me.

jaffusmax

I totally agree, the internet gave me access to information that filled gaps once filled with superstitious nonsense!

nosietoes

I always loved the stories of the bible funnily enough, used to read ,y kids bible like another novel.

First started feeling uncomfortable sometime around 5/6th class whe I watched ppl say the creed with a blank look and felt they weren't feeling and believing the words, which seemed powerful in their intent, that they were mumbling.

Instead of swearing off drink for my confirmation, I vowed to read the bible and I somewhat succeeded. And what I read didn't match with the lessons I had learnt in religion class...

I also remember listening to a history programme on the way home,from mass one Sunday night where they mentioned that celibacy was only introduced in the 4th (I think, this is 20 years ago, could've been the 9th) century and thinking how ****ed up that was. Still think the Catholic clergy today would be a lot healthier n more affective if allowed normal healthy family lives.

fisgon

I began to smell a rat in Primary school, when the class was told by the teacher that "the fear of god" in the bible in fact meant "fear of losing god", trying to soften the harsh image of the Old Testament deity.

Even to a seven or eight year old it was clear that the man was either lying to us, or completely deluded himself.

It wasn't really until I left school, though, when I travelled a little, met lots of interesting, helpful, good people, none of whom were religious in any way, that I realized that a life without religion was not just possible but in fact preferable.

branie2

I had, what you might call, an atheist moment years ago. It was holy Saturday at the vigil mass. One of the readings was God asking Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac. I remember thinking to myself what sort of God would do this?

Saipanne

branie2 wrote: »

I had, what you might call, an atheist moment years ago. It was holy Saturday at the vigil mass. One of the readings was God asking Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac. I remember thinking to myself what sort of God would do this?

I suppose you just sat there instead of storming out?

branie2

Yes

Buona Fortuna

Always been wishy washy christian. In my teens I learnt the word agnostic and kinda liked it. It was edgy - like me . I also thought it was like a half way house, like can't really make your mind up.

So agnostic was grand for a few years until I joined the army. When they give you dog tags they ask religion.

"Religion?"
"Agnostic, Corporal."
"What's that then?"
Queue a wishy washy explanation from me.
"Right. Shut up. Atheist then. And don't think this gets you out of church parade because it don't. DOUBLE AWAY."

After that the Internet really chrystalised things.

Hotblack Desiato

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=89972100&postcount=2

laurinjames

Most of the stories here have a common theme, very badly taught religion combined with very badly practicing 'catholics'. Enough to put anyone off. Who can really blame you.

Squeedily Spooch

laurinjames wrote: »

Most of the stories here have a common theme, very badly taught religion combined with very badly practicing 'catholics'. Enough to put anyone off. Who can really blame you.

Catholicism on it's own is enough to put anyone off.

I was a teenager, 14 or 15. I was in bed having woken up in the middle of the night because of a nightmare. To stop being so afraid I used to pray because God would make everything ok again. I was about to pray when suddenly I thought of Bruce Willis for no reason. I imagined McClane laughing and mocking my demons and I felt so much better. Then, as I was falling back to sleep I realised Bruce did what God was supposed to do and he actually did it better.

I the morning it became painfully clear I'd been imagining God vanquishing my demons my whole life. Now I just pray to Bruce.

nozzferrahhtoo

Shrap wrote: »

When I knew what a believer was.

That pretty much sums it up for me too. I never became an "unbeliever" or discovered I was one..... so much as I reached an age where it hit me "Hang on people actually believe this stuff???"

There was a time in my life too when I found out that some people who watch things like Eastenders and Coronation Street believe them to be real people too. Some actors playing "bad" characters even report stories of fans of the show coming up to them admonishing them for their behavior or life choices as if they were actually the people from the show. I remember reading one story of a character going through hard times being approached by a woman preferring money at her and wishing her well in her time of trouble.

That latter discovery, similar to the discovery people actually believe the god nonsense, was equally surprising and baffling. A kind of deep pit of the stomach dismay that people (not to mention how many people) are unable to look at something and realize there is simply no reason to think it true.

nc19

When I heard my first bible story.

How anyone get take these stories seriously is beyond me. Noahs Ark ffs......water into wine pfft....immaculate conception my arse! And before any says the stories are not to be taken literally if you dont take whats written in the book as true whats the feckin point in any of it?

We will see XMen type mutants before we see any tangible proof of a God

Pherekydes

Serenity Mushy Suburbanite wrote: »

Now I just pray to Bruce.

Bruce Almighty.

jaffusmax

I used to pray to Bertie Ahern for less tax and allowances....nuff said!

Brian Shanahan

Serenity Mushy Suburbanite wrote: »

I was a teenager, 14 or 15. I was in bed having woken up in the middle of the night because of a nightmare. To stop being so afraid I used to pray because God would make everything ok again. I was about to pray when suddenly I thought of Bruce Willis for no reason. I imagined McClane laughing and mocking my demons and I felt so much better. Then, as I was falling back to sleep I realised Bruce did what God was supposed to do and he actually did it better.

I the morning it became painfully clear I'd been imagining God vanquishing my demons my whole life. Now I just pray to Bruce.

And thus was born the church of DieHardism. Wait until the schism, the DieHarders will be a right pain.

fisgon

Squeedily Spooch wrote: »

Catholicism on it's own is enough to put anyone off.

Exactly. You often hear from religious people that if only we would discover the true form of religion (ie theirs) then we would be saved. The problem is, it wasn't the way catholicism was taught to me, it was catholicism itself, in all its bizarre, medieval, hypocritical essence, that put me off.

It isn't because I don't really know true religion that I don't believe, it is precisely because I know what religion is all about that I am an atheist.

jaffusmax

fisgon wrote: »

Exactly. You often hear from religious people that if only we would discover the true form of religion (ie theirs) then we would be saved. The problem is, it wasn't the way catholicism was taught to me, it was catholicism itself, in all its bizarre, medieval, hypocritical essence, that put me off.

It isn't because I don't really know true religion that I don't believe, it is precisely because I know what religion is all about that I am an atheist.

The fact the New Testament is so vague about the foundation of a church in Christ name is a sure fire give away!

Finding a verse or 2 then transforming it into the basis of a Major Religious movement is akin to finding a dirty old boot in a bog and then claiming the Roman empire had controlled all of Ireland!

Shenshen

My story differs a little from most of the ones posted so far.
I didn't grow up in Ireland, but in the Catholic heartlands of Southern Germany.
Similar to here, you were just born Catholic, and that was that, no questions allowed.

But I was kind of lucky, the Catholics I met in my formative years were very, VERY different from the fearful, dour variety.
The man who baptised me was a good friend of my parents, a Fransiscan friar with the loudest and heartiest laugh ever. He called himself "God's wild boar", and had an immense sense of humour. But he would regularly be in trouble with his superiors for being - well, too human. He told me once that he saw it as his duty to follow his conscience rather than doctrine.

The primary school I went to was secular, but my secondary school was run by Mary Ward nuns (sub sections of Jesuits, I think). And they were similar little revolutionaries. We had extensive sex education, they made sure all the girls in their care knew damn well how to protect themselves from STIs (most importantly from AIDS, the massive scare at the time) and unwanted pregnancies. I've never once heard any of them even suggesting that one should wait until marriage. Their message was to find a loving relationship, and to take things at your own pace. Don't let anyone pressure you, but if you want to have sex, here's how you do it safely.
They never thought much of having to wear the veil, either. About half of them never did, many of them had ditched habits in favour of plain skirts and blouses anyway. Years before the Vatican declared that this could possibly be allowed.
They were also very strong convinced environmentalists, setting up a recycling co-op in the school, protesting plans for new nuclear power stations, teaching us how to safe water, you name it.
They were happy enough to accept same-sex relationships between older students, no judgment, just being happy for the girls in question.


I have learned a lot from them, and I am truly grateful. The lessons of respect, of critical thinking, of picking your fights well in life, of self-awareness have always served me well.
On the other hand, the very fact that I admired all this so much as it tied in to totally with my own morals and ethics that I didn't want to question if the biblical background would actually hold up to scrutiny.

That happened much later, and funnily enough on another online forum. I was discussing religion trying to take what I thought was a sensible kind-of-in-the-middle position, and as the discussion progressed the question to me became ever clearer - how could I call myself Christian, let alone Catholic, if I though the whole thing was effectively a made-up collection of moral tales without any of the supernatural stuff being actually real?

And that's when it clicked - I had been engaging in double-think for quite some time without realising. It was time I admitted it. I was actually an atheist.


Edit : Goodness, sorry about the length of this!

robindch

Shenshen wrote: »

He told me once that he saw it as his duty to follow his conscience rather than doctrine.

Catechism of the Catholic Church, Rule 1800:

http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s1c1a6.htm

Daemonic

Bit of a caveat to that in 1801 though, follow your conscience at all times, but you can still be wrong

equivariant

I don't think that I really ever took the god thing that seriously but if I was to pick one moment that made me self identify as an atheist, it would be
when my dad died (many years ago now). Lots of my extended family were giving it the usual 'he's in a better place' and I just was thinking to myself "really?".

I also remember that a priest who had been a good friend of my dad scoffed at my lack of belief in the afterlife ('you'll grow out of that' or some similar condescending claptrap - I was in my twenties). I lost a lot of respect for him then.

looksee

nc19 wrote: »

When I heard my first bible story.

How anyone get take these stories seriously is beyond me. Noahs Ark ffs......water into wine pfft....immaculate conception my arse! And before any says the stories are not to be taken literally if you dont take whats written in the book as true whats the feckin point in any of it?

We will see XMen type mutants before we see any tangible proof of a God

Just to nit-pick for a minute, the immaculate conception isn't in the bible, its something that was invented in the (I think) 19th C to account for some deep theosophical problem. Which kind of says it all really.

branie2

When ye told your parents you were atheists, did some of you get the standard "as long you're in this house, you'll go to mass" speech?

rainbow kirby

branie2 wrote: »

When ye told your parents you were atheists, did some of you get the standard "as long you're in this house, you'll go to mass" speech?

Nope, surprisingly enough. My mum's attitude was always that the church considered you old enough to make your own decisions after Confirmation, so 11 year old me had a choice in the matter.

lazygal

branie2 wrote: »

When ye told your parents you were atheists, did some of you get the standard "as long you're in this house, you'll go to mass" speech?

No. My parents are typical a la carte Catholics so they didn't bother going apart from Christmas mass. They were never insistent on it when we were younger.

Brian Shanahan

branie2 wrote: »

When ye told your parents you were atheists, did some of you get the standard "as long you're in this house, you'll go to mass" speech?

No, but I did get a "don't be fidgeting and making a fool of us at funerals" speech, which was the same as the "don't be figeting and making a fool of us at mass" speeches I got as a child.

PopePalpatine

No, in fact my family rarely goes to Mass, and my Dad's pretty much a nontheist. We only enter Catholic churches for social occasions such as weddings and funerals.

Shenshen

branie2 wrote: »

When ye told your parents you were atheists, did some of you get the standard "as long you're in this house, you'll go to mass" speech?

No, the only reaction I got from her was "Don't tell your grandparents, they won't understand and it'll only upset them".

Sclosages

In the past few months! :eek:

Uncle Ruckus

I think I always knew deep down. Reading the God Delusion pretty much cemented it.