Treat them mean and keep them keen

steddyeddy

And nice guys finish last.

Any truth to these statements?

wazky

Are we talking Larry Murphy levels of treating mean or just not texting her.back for a days level?

The Th!ng

I'll let you know when I finish shagging your mum.

steddyeddy

wazky wrote: »

Are we talking Larry Murphy levels of treating mean or just not texting her.back for a days level?

Nah just being a man whore I suppose and not texting them back.

Last_Minute

This is true. There were scientific, peer reviewed studies done on this theory in the late 90's and they confirmed this.

steddyeddy

The Th!ng wrote: »

I'll let you know when I finish shagging your mum.

Why, are you not going to call her back?

shane9689

did things not work out with the young wan? :P

0 truth... weak guys finish last

Mariasofia

steddyeddy wrote: »

And nice guys finish last.

Any truth to these statements?

Absolutely none......treat em mean and enjoy your pints with the lads when youre 60.......

steddyeddy

shane9689 wrote: »

did things not work out with the young wan? :P

0 truth... weak guys finish last

I didn't try yet but I'm meeting another young wan tomorrow :P.

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

inb4 wibbs

steddyeddy

Mariasofia wrote: »

Absolutely none......treat em mean and enjoy your pints with the lads when youre 60.......

Deadly!! Sounds good

Sauve

steddyeddy wrote: »

And nice guys finish last.

Any truth to these statements?

Maybe in a short-term context, as in a one-nighter or a fling.
But if you want any more than that from someone, don't do it dude. It smacks of insecurity and immaturity. Just be straight, if you like someone- let them know. If they like you too and they're genuine and upfront, then it's win-win.

Life's too short to be messing with people

Talib Fiasco

Nice guys do finish last and not just with women. Very famous book was written about the 'nice guy syndrome'. Well worth a gawk

The Backwards Man

Women are a lot like houses.

You need a different key for every front door.

Mariasofia

steddyeddy wrote: »

Deadly!! Sounds good

Enjoy that cold lonely bed too

Macavity.

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Women are a lot like houses.

You need a different key for every front door.

What about the back door?

Bowlardo

wehn i was younger i always thought that phrase meant what i think it meant but as i got older i always thought it meant in a sexual way... as in that she goes first and then you finished last....i could stand corrected

The Backwards Man

Macavity. wrote: »

What about the back door?

You stay away from it until you are well acquainted.

mrty

steddyeddy wrote: »

And nice guys finish last.

Any truth to these statements?

Just be yourself.

Czarcasm

It's only true if you both still have the mentality of your 12 year old selves, but otherwise?

No.

MS.ing

Macavity. wrote: »

What about the back door?

grand. just no very big keys

Wibbs

Depends entirely on the context and the people involved SE. Some women do respond better to a certain level of take it or leave it.

Plus I would say that for a few guys out there not treating "them" mean means gushing over women, just because they're women. IMHO the latter is sexist in the extreme. It's treating women as different, just because they happen to have a vagina and the guy wants access to that. In some ways the self proclaimed "nice guy" is a liar and a chancer. He's fronting an idea of "nice" and harmless(hardly a vibe to rouse the blood), while looking for more. "I want to be your frrrieeeeend, why don't you want to shag me" BS. At least the prickish "bad boy" player type is honest about what he wants. If as a woman you have such "friends" around you and you know they want more, a prick who is direct can be a breath of fresh air because of his honesty*. At least you know where you stand. With the let's just be friends men you don't. There's an ulterior motive going on. And that IMHO is why a fair few ladies go for the bad boy, it's not because he treats her badly, it's more because he's more honest and she knows where she stands.

My 2 cents anyway.


*and the I must tame him vibe.

GLaDOS

Difference between being a nice guy and being a doormat who can't assert himself.

Gran Hermano

It is not me, it is you.


And I've enough friends.

pablomakaveli

I think somewhere in the middle works best. Dont be a gob****e, but don't be a complete pushover either.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Don't hate the playa hate da game


#hood4lyf

Wibbs

Cliff notes(as our Yank mates say). Be honest, not "mean" or "nice". I like you. let's explore that.

OldMrBrennan83

This post has been deleted.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Patww79 wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

No, if you love somebody you have to trick them into loving you! By being mean to them and deliberately messing with their head! That's what you do when you love somebody, you behave like a sociopath, d'uh.

steddyeddy

Wibbs wrote: »

Depends entirely on the context and the people involved SE. Some women do respond better to a certain level of take it or leave it.

Plus I would say that for a few guys out there not treating "them" mean means gushing over women, just because they're women. IMHO the latter is sexist in the extreme. It's treating women as different, just because they happen to have a vagina and the guy wants access to that. In some ways the self proclaimed "nice guy" is a liar and a chancer. He's fronting an idea of "nice" and harmless(hardly a vibe to rouse the blood), while looking for more. "I want to be your frrrieeeeend, why don't you want to shag me" BS. At least the prickish "bad boy" player type is honest about what he wants. If as a woman you have such "friends" around you and you know they want more, a prick who is direct can be a breath of fresh air because of his honesty*. At least you know where you stand. With the let's just be friends men you don't. There's an ulterior motive going on. And that IMHO is why a fair few ladies go for the bad boy, it's not because he treats her badly, it's more because he's more honest and she knows where she stands.

My 2 cents anyway.


*and the I must tame him vibe.

I just find human interactions fascinating Wibbs. It seems more pronounced amongst the younger generation (the whole nice guy and bad boy thing). There's a young wan in the class who's friends with this extremely nice guy for the last few years. After a year he tells her he likes her and gets rejected. He then proceeds to continually drive her around the place buying her presents ect!! I wonder how many people think that is a good tactic.

efb

thinly veiled- "I had secks" thread

BandyMandy

I'm a gob****e, I have falling for one of those "treat them mean' types.... Can someone help me turn the tables?....I know he's a player and I hate myself for falling for his charms!

Macavity.

A lot of guys who tend to be dickheads, IME, tend to be quite confident and charismatic which obviously are attractive characteristics which I think is the main factor here. Men who actively try to be mean or a "bad boy" :rolleyes: type guy generally are lacking in confidence and social skills, ultimately leading to them having little success in this area.

steddyeddy

A female friend of mine falls for these bad boy types. The thing is I don't think they're bad boys. They just seem more dishonest to me.

Macavity.

steddyeddy wrote: »

After a year he tells her he likes her and gets rejected. He then proceeds to continually drive her around the place buying her presents ect!! I wonder how many people think that is a good tactic.

Pathetic.

Wibbs

Gracelyn Enough Robe wrote: »

No, if you love somebody you have to trick them into loving you!

True EB. Though if you think you love someone before they reciprocate then you're on the back foot to nowhere already. AKA a sad eejit(male or female). For me it's nada to do with tricks, it's about being you and being cool with who you are and if you meet someone who you want to share that with for however long or short a time and they're both up for that journey and worthy of it(and vice versa) then play ball. For me the subterfuge comes from a) not being cool with who you are and b) disguising that and your intent. IMH "Nice" guys finish last because self reporting nice guys usually aren't. And they should finish last too IMH. Nobody needs BS dressed up as nice.

steddyeddy

steddyeddy wrote: »

I just find human interactions fascinating Wibbs. It seems more pronounced amongst the younger generation (the whole nice guy and bad boy thing). There's a young wan in the class who's friends with this extremely nice guy for the last few years. After a year he tells her he likes her and gets rejected. He then proceeds to continually drive her around the place buying her presents ect!! I wonder how many people think that is a good tactic.

Both of them are players in that game of lets pretend. He thinks one day she'll come to her senses and see him for the nice guy that he is if he's persistent enough, and in the meantime he lies to her and himself by insisting they're just friends, and she thinks he's a handy fall-back when there no man around or if she needs an ego boost but she tells herself it's just friendship too. He then thinks that if he puts enough nice in, he'll get some sex out.

I see it all the time, mostly people grow out of this stuff by their mid 20's.

calanus

Mo Farrah seems like a nice guy but he is coming first in all the races so I don't know what to make of it

steddyeddy

Candie wrote: »

Both of them are players in that game of lets pretend. He thinks one day she'll come to her senses and see him for the nice guy that he is if he's persistent enough, and in the meantime he lies to her and himself by insisting they're just friends, and she thinks he's a handy fall-back when there no man around or if she needs an ego boost but she tells herself it's just friendship too. He then thinks that if he puts enough nice in, he'll get some sex out.

I see it all the time, mostly people grow out of this stuff by their mid 20's.

I know they are. That's what made me start this thread. She knows he likes her yet she continues to lead him on.

dgt

Well, whatever about treating them mean, but some women respond well when you get them excited/heart racing. Sometimes they just want to feel alive, a sense of danger, excitement, adventure

Regards, mr welded diff :cool:

steddyeddy

steddyeddy wrote: »

I know they are. That's what made me start this thread. She knows he likes her yet she continues to lead him on.

And he knows she's not interested but still sticks around being nice in the hopes that one day he'll get some. He's not being honest either, because he's telling her they're friends when he doesn't want her friendship. It takes two. He'll hang around and co operate if he thinks things will go his way in the end, and she either genuinely thinks they're friends or she's willing to exploit his willingness to persist.

upfrontwithit

steddyeddy wrote: »

And nice guys finish last.

Any truth to these statements?

Yes, but it usually applies to women who are scumbags as well, in fact it's the best way to get said women to behave themselves.

steddyeddy

Candie wrote: »

And he knows she's not interested but still sticks around being nice in the hopes that one day he'll get some. He's not being honest either, because he's telling her they're friends when he doesn't want her friendship. It takes too. He'll hang around and co operate if he thinks things will go his way in the end, and she either genuinely thinks they're friends or she's willing to exploit his willingness to persist.

Yea that's true.

Mariasofia

dgt wrote: »

Well, whatever about treating them mean, but some women respond well when you get them excited/heart racing. Sometimes they just want to feel alive, a sense of danger, excitement, adventure

Regards, mr welded diff :cool:

Make them feel alive and excited by making them feel special then.....hate that whole treat em mean concept but maybe Im just am too long in the game and immune to that shyte! Lads do yourself a favour and stop with the games....she will respect ya more in the long run....




Disclaimer *dont be a fcuking wuss either find a happy medium *

Adamantium

They're very keen to answer to in reply what you feel you said, but not the content/message of what you said. That's why have to ask the same question twice or give instruction twice, until I get a direct hit or they settle down

Feels like a bit like talking to children at times

Wibbs

steddyeddy wrote: »

I just find human interactions fascinating Wibbs. It seems more pronounced amongst the younger generation (the whole nice guy and bad boy thing).

Speaking as an old fart SE I'd say it has always been thus. In my lifetime anyway. Now far back in the day pre gender equality it was less, mainly because women had far fewer choices and settling down was a given so many women settled. A "nice" guy could work in that scenario. Though the marriages would be shíte.

These days not nearly so much. Women have way more life choices so they pick more carefully. Pick more what they want. Its more honest but more of a free for all. Meaning the guys who would have gotten someone in the past may now get nobody, or a lot fewer and the guys in demand are more in demand.

There's a young wan in the class who's friends with this extremely nice guy for the last few years. After a year he tells her he likes her and gets rejected. He then proceeds to continually drive her around the place buying her presents ect!! I wonder how many people think that is a good tactic.

*palm, insert face*. What the hell is he trying to achieve SE? He waited too long to find out(if he even had a shot in the first place), she tells him nope and now he thinks being a sap on a lead is arousing? Eh.... Worst. Tactic. Ever. All he's ever gonna get is the tear stains on his shoulder when she cries about the bloke who is actually sleeping with her and who she's just had a fight with(until they make up in short order) and platitudes like "oh you're so nice, any woman would be happy to be your girlfriend" type nonsense.

His best "tactic" IMHO? Scrape her off. Chalk it up to daftness, we've all been there regardless of our genital status and move on, learning from it as he goes. The lesson in brief? If you like someone, don't wait around being "nice". Be actually nice and say it and show it(without breaking out the flowers and serenading up front. That comes after the *ahem*) and do this upfront and as soon as poss. Saves later embarrassment all around.

upfrontwithit

Wibbs wrote: »

Speaking as an old fart SE I'd say it has always been thus. In my lifetime anyway. Now far back in the day pre gender equality it was less, mainly because women had far fewer choices and settling down was a given so many women settled. A "nice" guy could work in that scenario. Though the marriages would be shíte.

These days not nearly so much. Women have way more life choices so they pick more carefully. Pick more what they want. Its more honest but more of a free for all. Meaning the guys who would have gotten someone in the past may now get nobody, or a lot fewer and the guys in demand are more in demand.

*palm, insert face*. What the hell is he trying to achieve SE? He waited too long to find out(if he even had a shot in the first place), she tells him nope and now he thinks being a sap on a lead is arousing? Eh.... Worst. Tactic. Ever. All he's ever gonna get is the tear stains on his shoulder when she cries about the bloke who is actually sleeping with her and who she's just had a fight with(until they make up in short order) and platitudes like "oh you're so nice, any woman would be happy to be your girlfriend" type nonsense.

His best "tactic" IMHO? Scrape her off. Chalk it up to daftness, we've all been there regardless of our genital status and move on, learning from it as he goes. The lesson in brief? If you like someone, don't wait around being "nice". Be actually nice and say it and show it(without breaking out the flowers and serenading up front. That comes after the *ahem*) and do this upfront and as soon as poss. Saves later embarrassment all around.

Are you another one of those lads that spends all day analysing women because you never get the shag ?

takamichinoku

I never heard of "Treat them mean and keep them keen" before... it sounds like the sort of phrase you'd let a character say in something just to clarify they're an arsehole.

"Nice guys finish last" has been talked to death, "nice guys" are pretty disingenuous and so on, or they're spineless/boring as ****.
It's just that sort of sickeningly pleasant sort, isn't it? I mean, I knew girls that were extremely nice, but it was a kind of niceness that was stemming from insecurity and ****, maybe I was just projecting my mam onto them though. You can be a perfectly nice person without faking it and have a bit of a backbone and everything, you don't have to hide yourself to do it.



Someone actively living by these kind of slogans as some kind of rule, warping their personality to try and make themselves more successful, not really sure what the point of it all is beyond some casual sex ...to wind up in some ****ing nightmare of a relationship where you and the other person don't genuinely get along?

dgt

Mariasofia wrote: »

Make them feel alive and excited by making them feel special then.....hate that whole treat em mean concept but maybe Im just am too long in the game and immune to that shyte! Lads do yourself a favour and stop with the games....she will respect ya more in the long run....




Disclaimer *dont be a fcuking wuss either find a happy medium *

Thus, by getting them all excited gives you the opportunity to get intimate and indeed make them feel special. The feelings grow and you get closer. But, all women are different and I find that's how some women like to be treated, with excitement and adventure

Doing rings gets you into theirs

steddyeddy

upfrontwithit wrote: »

Are you another one of those lads that spends all day analysing women because you never get the shag ?

Says the lad who just tried to analyse someone

upfrontwithit

steddyeddy wrote: »

Says the lad who just tried to analyse someone

The only snag is I didn't have to, as I got it in one

Edit : I remember you now, you were the lad that has to go on the internet asking what he should do when a woman sends you dirty photos. :rolleyes: