Would you go out with someone who has cheated on their ex in the past?

Royce McCutcheon

Exactly as it says on the tin, would you give somebody a chance if you were aware they have done the dirt on someone else in the past?

I did myself for a few months and unfortunatly I was foolish to trust that strumpet!I am also aware of a lad who has cheated on every girlfriend he has had (around 6/7) and yet women keep going out with him.These 2 examples have made me move into the "once a cheater.." camp and I am definitly a bit more insecure/cynical person for all of it! .

Is it something that you personally could look by or would you be of the opinion that someone that has cheated in the past simply cannot be trusted?

Lucifer MorningStar

No, definitely not. But I'd still ride them though :pac:

frag420

Royce McCutcheon wrote: »

Exactly as it says on the tin, would you give somebody a chance if you were aware they have done the dirt on someone else in the past?

I did myself for a few months and unfortunatly I was foolish to trust that strumpet!I am also aware of a lad who has cheated on every girlfriend he has had (around 6/7) and yet women keep going out with him.These 2 examples have made me move into the "once a cheater.." camp and I am definitly a bit more insecure/cynical person for all of it! .

Is it something that you personally could look by or would you be of the opinion that someone that has cheated in the past simply cannot be trusted?

I shagged your ex....

desultory

Nope. Cheaters will always be cheaters, it's deep rooted in them.

Fox_In_Socks

I've cheated on my Y, does that count?

hoodwinked

just because one person does something doesn't mean everyone does something,


just because someone once did something doesn't mean they'll do it again,


but then i tend to judge people on what they bring to the table rather than who they were or where they have come from.

frag420

No wait......she shagged me!!

The Backwards Man

Every single person that ever does something is exactly the same as every other person who ever does something similar.

Lucifer MorningStar

hoodwinked wrote: »

just because one person does something doesn't mean everyone does something,


just because someone once did something doesn't mean they'll do it again,


but then i tend to judge people on what they bring to the table rather than who they were or where they have come from.

But if they cheated on their ex with you I think you would always have that doubt in your mind if he/she would do the same again. You wouldn't be able to trust that person 100%, and trust is everything.

Micky Dolenz

Yes

Fox_In_Socks

Every single person that ever does something is exactly the same as every other person who ever does something similar.

Legs.Eleven

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Every single person that ever does something is exactly the same as every other person who ever does something similar.

I agree.

Amirani

Open relationships get rid of all this hassle.

Earthhorse

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Every single person that ever does something is exactly the same as every other person who ever does something similar.

You know, you remind me a lot of me when I was you.

hoodwinked

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

But if they cheated on their ex with you I think you would always have that doubt in your mind if he/she would do the same again. You wouldn't be able to trust that person 100%, and trust is everything.

if thats what they brought to the table then no of course i wouldn't trust them,

but i wouldn't say "all men are cheaters" or like the op be "more cynical" because of a handful of encounters of men who are cheats, it does a great disservice to those who aren't


like wise, if it was a once off event many moons ago, i'd be more inclined to believe the relationship they were in wasn't the right one for them or that they were younger and more foolish, as opposed to labeling them a cheater, who's to say the current one is now the right one for them or they have matured and thus they will remain faithful?

Royce McCutcheon

Diego Simeone wrote: »

Open relationships get rid of all this hassle.

Do they really though? Eventually most end as someone becomes emotionally attached and hurt as a result

The Backwards Man

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

I agree.

Are you being sarcastic?

donegal__road

we should adopt the French attitude to sex.

Royce McCutcheon

hoodwinked wrote: »

if thats what they brought to the table then no of course i wouldn't trust them,

but i wouldn't say "all men are cheaters" or like the op be "more cynical" because of a handful of encounters of men who are cheats, it does a great disservice to those who aren't


like wise, if it was a once off event many moons ago, i'd be more inclined to believe the relationship they were in wasn't the right one for them or that they were younger and more foolish, as opposed to labeling them a cheater, who's to say the current one is now the right one for them or they have matured and thus they will remain faithful?

I would be more of the opinion that if they are unhappy in a relationship they should have the stones to break up with the person and then get with someone else. Any other way of doing it screams dishonesty and immaturity and once you become an adult it is hard to suddenly eradicate these two traits IMO

Amirani

Royce McCutcheon wrote: »

Do they really though? Eventually most end as someone becomes emotionally attached and hurt as a result

Emotional attachments are fine. I'm talking about the sex bit. I'm not entirely sure why relationships and sex have to be mutually inclusive.

Obviously jealousy can become a problem for some people, but if both members of the relationship can be happy with the other safely sleeping with other people it can work well.

hoodwinked

Royce McCutcheon wrote: »

I would be more of the opinion that if they are unhappy in a relationship they should have the stones to break up with the person and then get with someone else. Any other way of doing it screams dishonesty and immaturity and once you become an adult it is hard to suddenly gain these two traits IMO

haha thats what i always say, i wouldn't judge someone for doing it different though,

Barely There

Only if the person they cheated with, was me.

--LOS--

It would be a black mark but I think I'd judge them for myself

beano345

From experience no

Vito Corleone

Yes if I was really into them, life is too short.

strobe

I'm not one for the concept that 'leopards don't change their spots bla bla derp'. People change constantly, that's undeniable. Was anyone reading this the same person they were at 18 as they were at 24? Or 24 and 37?

It'd depend on the person.

racso1975

I cheated on my ex.......with the woman i am now married to and have 2 children with

Katgurl

It depends. If they were young & immature but have grown up since / if it was ages ago in a not-very-serious relationship / if they really regretted it and said it wasn't worth it then yes, absolutely.

If however, they cheated on everybody and just seemed easily led by temptatiOn, then no - more because they're weak and pathetic.

But to be honest, I can't really imagine dissecting a previous relationship with a current partner; it's their own business.

If it was the other way around I would not be explaining my past to anyone or providing any justificatications.

Tarzana

I know people say that "once a cheater, always a cheater" is stupid, but I think there can be some truth in it depending on the age the person was when they cheated. Wet behind the ears? Yeah, forgiveable. Fully mature, or if they cheated habitually? I'd be wary, to be honest.

HalloweenJack

I cheated on my first GF, several times actually. I'm not proud of it but it's something I did.

Since then, I've had three GFs (am with my current one for over a year) and guess how many times I've cheated in those three realtionships? 0. I've been tempted and I've had opportunities but I didn't do anything because I'm faithful.

And I'm not the only person I know who's cheated and then gone on to have faithful relationships afterwards.

"Once a cheat, always a cheat" is a very simplistic maxim and very black and white. Reality is more grey and to answer the OP, I would give a possible partner a chance. Relationships depend on the chemistry between those involved, not on the previous relationships of the two parties.

Wibbs

desultory wrote: »

Nope. Cheaters will always be cheaters, it's deep rooted in them.

Bollocks. Sorry, but that has been my experience.

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

But if they cheated on their ex with you I think you would always have that doubt in your mind if he/she would do the same again. You wouldn't be able to trust that person 100%, and trust is everything.

And that would be in your head, not theirs.

That all said, past actions and attitudes tend to influence future actions and attitudes. A one off cheating episode when they were younger? Not such a big issue. A repeated meme of same, not so good at all and not to be trusted. It also depends on the nature of the episode. Like I say a one off, not an issue, but avoid those who regularly overlap relationships, even if not considered obvious cheating. I'd also extend the definition of cheating. It's not all about the sex thang. Emotional cheating can be more of a worry. A one off drunken snog is a lot less dodgy than an extended emotional connection and background communication. The type that does the latter is not to be trusted, because they'll tend to look externally when the going gets tough or even a little boring for them.

trey99

Im a cheater, ill never change that, and i have been like this 10 years now. You get bored too fast in relationships, so no i stay single and shag whenever i can, being in a band helps with pulling the the oul pussy, i get into a relationship with one person who is great at shagging, then when i get bored i move on, having the same pussy for too long is borung as you have moulded it to your liking and now its time to become somebody elses mess, which in my case is a mess because i like to destroy it haha, fisting and all that, lets hope any of you didnt get my leftovers.

Tarzana

HalloweenJack wrote: »

I cheated on my first GF, several times actually. I'm not proud of it but it's something I did.

Since then, I've had three GFs (am with my current one for over a year) and guess how many times I've cheated in those three realtionships? 0. I've been tempted and I've had opportunities but I didn't do anything because I'm faithful.

And I'm not the only person I know who's cheated and then gone on to have faithful relationships afterwards.

"Once a cheat, always a cheat" is a very simplistic maxim and very black and white. Reality is more grey and to answer the OP, I would give a possible partner a chance. Relationships depend on the chemistry between those involved, not on the previous relationships of the two parties.

What age were you when you cheated?

Wibbs

trey99 wrote: »

which in my case is a mess because i like to destroy it haha, fisting and all that, lets hope any of you didnt get my leftovers.

Small penis. Bless.

Katgurl

trey99 wrote: »

Im a cheater, ill never change that, and i have been like this 10 years now. You get bored too fast in relationships, so no i stay single and shag whenever i can, being in a band helps with pulling the the oul pussy, i get into a relationship with one person who is great at shagging, then when i get bored i move on, having the same pussy for too long is borung as you have moulded it to your liking and now its time to become somebody elses mess, which in my case is a mess because i like to destroy it haha, fisting and all that, lets hope any of you didnt get my leftovers.

You sound disgusting

HalloweenJack

Tarzana wrote: »

What age were you when you cheated?

17-20.

Wibbs

Personally I've never cheated on a girlfriend. TBH, it was only very rarely I've been tempted. It's just the way I'm built. However I have been the "other man" quite the number of times. The guy they were cheating with, so that is/was pat of how I was built too. It does give you an interesting insight into the dynamics of it. The whys of someone may cheat and the whos they choose to cheat with. For a start I've noted they didn't see it as cheating as such. To admit that usually meant game over.

desultory

desultory wrote: »

Nope. Cheaters will always be cheaters, it's deep rooted in them.

Dunno about that to be honest. Circumstances change over time and people get older and wiser.

The deep rooted you refer to is insecurity. If this can be overcome then there is little reason why people cant turn their life around and settle down but i accept thats a big if.

But ill agree that there is also arrogant selfish people who conduct in this behaviour. All in all though, people cheat for various reasons.

Vito Corleone

trey99 wrote: »

Im a cheater, ill never change that, and i have been like this 10 years now. You get bored too fast in relationships, so no i stay single and shag whenever i can, being in a band helps with pulling the the oul pussy, i get into a relationship with one person who is great at shagging, then when i get bored i move on, having the same pussy for too long is borung as you have moulded it to your liking and now its time to become somebody elses mess, which in my case is a mess because i like to destroy it haha, fisting and all that, lets hope any of you didnt get my leftovers.

You're a grown man who is a drummer in a band. You display signs of having very poor literacy skills. A look through your posts shows you have a codeine and nurofen dependency issue.

Your name is Trey.

Do not fabricate stories of having success with women.

hoodwinked

hoodwinked wrote: »

just because one person does something doesn't mean everyone does something,


just because someone once did something doesn't mean they'll do it again,


but then i tend to judge people on what they bring to the table rather than who they were or where they have come from.

Exactly. Its who you think they can become rather then what they have in the past. Id stop short of dating a serial killer though :pac:

trey99

trey99 wrote: »

Im a cheater, ill never change that, and i have been like this 10 years now. You get bored too fast in relationships, so no i stay single and shag whenever i can, being in a band helps with pulling the the oul pussy, i get into a relationship with one person who is great at shagging, then when i get bored i move on, having the same pussy for too long is borung as you have moulded it to your liking and now its time to become somebody elses mess, which in my case is a mess because i like to destroy it haha, fisting and all that, lets hope any of you didnt get my leftovers.

Maybe she is like throwing a sausage up O'Connell Street from cheating on you to begin with. Your fist is probably too small for her

B_Rabbit

trey99 wrote: »

Im a cheater, ill never change that, and i have been like this 10 years now. You get bored too fast in relationships, so no i stay single and shag whenever i can, being in a band helps with pulling the the oul pussy, i get into a relationship with one person who is great at shagging, then when i get bored i move on, having the same pussy for too long is borung as you have moulded it to your liking and now its time to become somebody elses mess, which in my case is a mess because i like to destroy it haha, fisting and all that, lets hope any of you didnt get my leftovers.

You sound like you're 12.
Your username indicates that you're 15.

Either way you're a gobsh!te

cactuspaw

For me, no. I'd have a very low opinion of anyone who cheats in a relationship. If you want to be in on your in it, if you want to be single your single. Just pick a side and stay there.

Just from my experience, don't try and stop you friends to from starting relationships with somebody who is a serial cheater, just better let them findout the hard way and help them pick up the pieces. Trying to stop them drives them drives your friend away.

Red21

The seriousness/badness of cheating is massively overstated, particularly by young woman. It's as if they think by overstating the wrongness of it they'll convience men not to play around.This whole thing is bogus and backfires for young woman cos if a guy doesn't cheat because it'll make him look bad what does that say about him. You could say he's just cunning whereas the guy being his true self doesn't care about his image in that way, he may cheat but at least he's not pretending to be something he's not.

So women remember it's better to always go for a cheater, those guys are for keeps.

desultory

Wibbs wrote: »

Bollocks. Sorry, but that has been my experience.

Fair enough.
However I've found that those that have the mentality to cheat(and get away with it without owning up and accepting responsibility) only ever change by evolving and learning how to cheat better.
Deep rooted insecurity.

From my experience that never changes.

stefan idiot jones

donegal__road wrote: »

we should adopt the French attitude to sex.

What, dripping melted brie on each other and not wearing any deodorant?

Lou.m

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

No, definitely not. But I'd still ride them though :pac:

They are probly goin out with someone else.

Lou.m

No I definitely would not.

Smidge

I have a friend who was never faithful to any of their partners before they were married. They have been married now for many years and no cheating, so who's to say?

Call Me Jimmy

I can't afford to be applying filters

Tarzana

HalloweenJack wrote: »

17-20.

This fits into the "wet behind the ears" category I mentioned earlier. Still cheating once well into one's 20s? Nah, feck off with you.