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Seeking old pal, Tea Gardens Hotel, Bondi Junction, Sydney, 1999-2000
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18-05-2014 1:00am#1Hi everyone, Mandi from Sydney here. First up, I'm not Irish, well maybe a little I am, my dad is part Australian and Chinese Indonesian, while mum is Malaysian, but dad had a great-grandmother who was born in Ireland, so there you go! I grew up in Sydney, so consider myself Australian!
Anyway this is my first post here, and me and my hubby are looking for some help in tracing an Irish friend of ours, Phil (or Phillip) Reynolds. He came to our wedding in Sydney in July 2000. We came to know Phil at the Tea Gardens Hotel, in Bondi Junction, Sydney in late 1999, early 2000.
In fact the Tea Gardens is our only real connection to Phil. He spent a lot of time there, and seemed to know a lot of the Irish people who hung out, or worked, there. There were two girls working there at the time, called Tine (short for Christine?) and Jackie, or Jacqui, who he talked to, so maybe even if we could trace them, plus anyone else who went to the Tea Gardens, we may be able to find Phil!
Long story short (and sorry, this post will be quite long!), we're trying to contact Phil as we're planning a special bash for our 15th anniversary next year, and would love to invite him.
Now Phil wasn't part of our regular circle of friends, and we really only knew him through the aforementioned Tea Gardens pub, where he was quite the regular! Now the Tea Gardens isn't an Irish bar as such, but a lot of Irish people visiting Sydney go there, and work there also. If you're Irish, and have been to Sydney, chances are you've been to the Tea Gardens at least once!
We lost track of Phil in late 2000 after he travelled to Asia. He didn't have an email (at the time), and described himself as "not being much of a computer person", which is probably why we can't find him on Facebook, Google, etc.
Even though Phil was a very chatty person, he didn't reveal a whole lot about himself! He mentioned his family, but really only in passing. His parents had moved around Ireland a lot as he was growing up, they went where the work was he said, and while he had a couple of brothers and sisters, he said little about them, expect to say he'd phoned for someone's birthday or some such.
All up we probably knew him for about 8 months while he was travelling through this part of the world. He mainly did casual labouring and gardening work while here. Today he'd be about 45. We didn't have any address for him in Ireland (at the time he had no immediate plans to return there), and we were moving house a bit ourselves at the time, so if Phil had tried to write to us, any mail may have been lost.
So unfortunately we don't have a lot to go on, so we thought we'd ask around the Irish community for help.
Basically we're wondering if anyone here might have gone to the Tea Gardens pub in late 1999 to mid 2000 (we're about talking the time just before the Sydney Olympics), or worked there, or have friends or relatives that did, who may have known him. There were Tine and Jacqui who I mentioned before, they are the only other names we remember, but there were others who talked to Phil and may remember him.
In short, we'd love to hear from anyone with any connections to the Tea Gardens from around 1999 to 2000. We know it's all a long shot, but we do want to make some effort to locate Phil!
Thanking you
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@Diddler82 thanks for the suggestion Does the Irish Times have a high readership in Ireland, or is it mainly for Australian based Irish people? We're working on the assumption that Phil, plus most of the people who might have known him in Sydney, returned to Ireland at some point.
Part of our problem is the little real information we have to work with, hence the reason we're hoping we can jog someone's memory. I'm thinking the Irish Times would need far more info than we really have. Still we'll keep the idea as an option if our present enquiries turn up nothing. 0 -
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@Diddler82 thanks for the suggestion Does the Irish Times have a high readership in Ireland, or is it mainly for Australian based Irish people? We're working on the assumption that Phil, plus most of the people who might have known him in Sydney, returned to Ireland at some point.
Part of our problem is the little real information we have to work with, hence the reason we're hoping we can jog someone's memory. I'm thinking the Irish Times would need far more info than we really have. Still we'll keep the idea as an option if our present enquiries turn up nothing.
Irish Echo is mainly for Irish people in Sydney. But the Irish Times is a national newspaper and many peoples first port of call from around the globe. It could be worth contacting them on this section below or via Twitter. This is the "Generation Emigration" Section.
http://www.irishtimes.com/blogs/generationemigration/
Best of luck and keep us updated 0 -
Phil UGC wrote:It is a long shot, but maybe someone would know someone who knew the barstaff
This is partly what we're trying to do here. Phil talked to a lot of the Irish travellers at the Tea Gardens, some of whom were staff. He especially had a soft spot for the Irish girls working there (a bit of a lady's man was our Phil!!). Two whose names I do remember are Tine (maybe short for Christine) and Jackie, who I already mentioned. They'd be about 35 to 40 today I guess. So if you know anyone by those names and ages, please send them my way
I contacted the management to ask if they could help me get in touch with ex-staff, but they were unable to help. Both the staff and clientele are very transient and quite young. It's not really your neighbourhood local sort of place. It seems to me people hang out there for a time and then move on. We've tried looking there and now it seems we have to look elsewhere, such as here 0 -
@Diddler82 oops, sorry, I got my wires well crossed there. I went referring to the Irish Echo as the Irish Times, but see there is in fact an Irish Times!
I've no doubt a media/news article would be a great idea, but I fear we really don't have much concrete info we could give to a media outlet for such a story. It's no doubt part of the reason we're having so much trouble tracing Phil today! Still, we're keeping the idea open as an option 0 -
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@6541, thanks for that. I found the "Irish People Living in Australia" FB page the other week and posted there, but will also look at the "ClanNa Gael-Bondi" page also 0
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@roaming_jen, thanks for that Hubby found an Irish photography forum a week or three ago and was wondering if we should post something there (we haven't yet), but parenting forums sound like an awesome idea. Thanks again 0
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Lost love story? Whatever happened there? Do tell!
In answer to your question, no, we haven't heard from Phil, or anything from anyone, or from people like Tine & Jackie, who might have known him.
You wouldn't have any idea what town Tine was from? If we were somehow able to trace her, we might find Phil, and obviously find out how she is at the same time!
You think Tine looks like Kirsten Dunst?? Interesting!! 0 -
Sorry Mandi no idea location of Tine, aside that she was from Ireland. Story's a shocker I'm afraid to say! Always feel really guilty (yup, all these years later) because of what happened. Lol, I google her every few years. Last time was when I thought work was sending me to London & Dublin in 2011, trip never happened
This is the first time I've found any reference to her online whatsoever! Should I even be thinking about this stuff at all?! Nah probably not, but do they say? C'est la vie. Anyhoo, good luck finding Phil. Sorry, don't remember/know him at all, though it sounds like I should! 0 -
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Hey Mandi, you know it's funny, I thought I saw Tine at Bondi Junction last Sunday! She was at a bus stop across the road from where I was, and looking my way. I crossed over to get closer, thinking it couldn't possibly be her, to "check" the bus timetable. She kept looking at me with a half smile on her face. She wasn't exactly alone, and I happened to be on the phone, but now I'm kicking myself for not figuring out some excuse to talk to her!! Still, I couldn't be sure it was her, but couldn't be sure it wasn't, know what I mean?
Mind you, I just might've been able to find out something about Phil, so yes, kicking myself again! Sorry, I sort of forgot about him for a minute there 0 -
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Lol, @roaming_jen, I may be unforgettable, but usually for all the wrong reasons! And, yup, I guess I had expected a cooler reception if I were ever to see Tine again. Not that I was. However, I do try to account for every possibility, sadly just not the ones that actually occur, it seems. So sure Sunday was a bit of a double whammy. It didn't help either that I somehow convinced myself it wasn't Tine I saw, but I was soon asking myself who the hell else it could have been.
@Mandi, what went wrong? Hmm. Stuff was wrong, my life was a mess. WAS? Ha! STILL IS!!
All sorts of stuff. Well, two main things really. I felt I had to keep my distance, but you know, what happened was still bad! So have you heard from anyone who knew anything about Phil? There were stacks of Irish people there, I'm surprised you haven't from at least a few people who were there. I will most certainly tell Tine about this thread if I do see her again though 0 -
Things couldn't have been that bad in your life surely?? It seems like a strange reason to keep a "distance" from a girl to me.....
Ok, sure, I don't know your story, and we have no idea what battles the next person is fighting, but Tine, and this from the little I really do know of her, seemed, or should that be seems, like a down to earth, easy going, person to me. If she liked someone in particular I'm sure that's all that mattered to her? It's the way it works for me.
Er, and I hope you don't mind, we've telling some of our friends your story. You ask in here about Tine, having not seen her in 15 years, and then see her a week later in Bondi Junction. You wouldn't read about that sort of stuff. Ok, you would, I know that, but how rare is something like that?!?
Oh, and @roaming_jen, we took you up on that parent forum idea you suggested earlier on. Obviously we heard nothing, but did meet some helpful people. 0 -
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Hi Bruschi, I'm sorry to hear that. It's awful when something like that happens. I think back on the people I once knew, and have lost contact with, even in these days of facebook, but always assume they're out there somewhere and are well and happy.
Even though we've found no trace at all, yet, of Phil, we try not to think that he may no longer be with us.
Despite the circumstances, it's interesting you were able to trace your old friends with a first name search in google! Phil only ever told us his surname the once, when I wanted to mail him a wedding invitation, so I'm hoping I even heard or remember it correctly!
And as you say, it's always great to reconnect with people you knew from a long time ago, we remain hopeful we'll hear from Phil, one way or another. 0 -
Hi Bruschi, I'm sorry to hear that. It's awful when something like that happens. I think back on the people I once knew, and have lost contact with, even in these days of facebook, but always assume they're out there somewhere and are well and happy.
Even though we've found no trace at all, yet, of Phil, we try not to think that he may no longer be with us.
Despite the circumstances, it's interesting you were able to trace your old friends with a first name search in google! Phil only ever told us his surname the once, when I wanted to mail him a wedding invitation, so I'm hoping I even heard or remember it correctly!
And as you say, it's always great to reconnect with people you knew from a long time ago, we remain hopeful we'll hear from Phil, one way or another.
yeah I was glad I made the effort to find them again, it was just a shame it was not how I had hoped things worked out. They were just 6 months married and she was 3 months pregnant when it happened, and on Christmas eve, so it was an awful tragedy. It was more due to the accident that I was able to find them as quickly, but I'm sure I would have been able to find them one way or another.
If you know Phils surname, or even his hometown in Ireland, it would make it a lot easier to find. Even his home county would be a good help.0 -
That's terrible. Imagine the child growing up never knowing their father. I'm really sorry to hear that as well.
Phil's surname is Reynolds, or that's what I thought I heard him say. That point really only ever came up the once, in regards to sending out a wedding invitation. Otherwise we were always on first names. He said "Reynolds", I said "Reynolds", he said "yeah, yeah", almost as if to say it were close enough.
As to a hometown, or county, this has always been an issue. He told us his family moved around as he was growing up, his parents went where the work was he said, so, in his own words, he was from no one place. He did mention some of the towns, but I'm afraid after 15 years we've forgotten those details.
With so little to really go on, we've pinned our hopes on finding people who may have been at the Tea Gardens, who knew him. He was very outgoing and talkative, and seemed to know everyone who'd walk passed us. This includes the staff, particularly the Irish girls (he was a bit of a lady's man!), Tine & Jacqui (who I mentioned earlier). There were other bar staff, but those are the only names we now remember.
Our friend @VeBe here in this discussion also, who I believe found this thread 3 weeks ago through a google search himself, apparently had something going on with Tine, and was asking if we might have heard from her.
By bizarre twist of fate he then saw Tine, 15 years later, right there in Bondi Junction, where the Tea Gardens is located, like 2 weeks ago, but had trouble believing it was actually her at the time of this encounter (look a few posts up).
Needless to say, we've got our fingers crossed that @VeBe runs into her again, as this is may be the best link we have right now!0 -
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Sure did, hubby's a Linkedin member. We tried all sorts of social networks, even Myspace, and ICQ (which I was surprised to see was still going) plus the current ones of course, google-plus, ello, you name it, not to mention some quite weird and wonderful google search terms on web and image search.
Obviously there were lots of name matches, and lol, lots of people using a photo of their cat or something as an avatar, but no one that looked like him, or whose profile really matched what we knew of him. We messaged some of those people with the same name who we thought might be him, and some of them replied, some didn't.
In his own words he wasn't "much of a computer person" so that might explain why there's no trace of him online. I assume he'd be on email today (he wasn't 15 years ago) and maybe FB, ( I mean who isn't?) even if he isn't very active.
After a year of looking, we feel we've exhausted many of the online search options, so that's why we're hoping we might run into someone who was in Sydney at the time he was, who might just be in touch with him today. 0 -
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Well if you do see her, that would be awesome. I don't know if I'd recognise her if she was at the shops or something. Not such a problem for you, right, so we're pinning our hopes on you, big responsibility here!!
No, there's been nothing concrete re Phil at all. We've heard from one or two people who were at the Tea Gardens at the time, but they didn't know of Phil, or anyone else.
You know, I keeping it's kind of strange, we were all sitting there with Phil, and you were probably nearby, sitting next to us maybe on some nights, and you had a situation going on with a girl behind the bar that possibly no one else knew of!
As I remember it, Tine was quite popular with the boys, I always heard guys calling out her name! But I get the feeling you were a little more low-key, right?
Ah, what you see, and what you don't see, I'll never look at a bar full of people the same way again!
Oh yes, you're right, the main downstairs is almost the same. They've changed the part right at the back of the room now, it's a sort of lounge area these days!0 -
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Haha! You must have seen that story from New Zealand last week, you know where a girl left notes near the place where she'd seen a guy who caught her eye!
Something like that happened in a movie didn't it? An American guy left notes around Vienna I think it was, for a French girl who he was meant to meet there.
It could be something we could ask VeBe to do, but I'm not sure what he'd think of that idea! 0 -
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Hi again roaming_jen
No, sorry, no update. But funny that you ask now, because we thought we saw Phil in Westfield Bondi Junction 2 weeks ago! We were looking at some promo cars parked in there, when we thought we saw him walking in. He appeared to be heading our way too! Suddenly an assistant working on the car promo started speaking to us, and the by the time we'd said "thanks but no thanks", "Phil" was gone. Lucky he was wearing a red shirt, because then we saw him on the escalator going up to the food hall. So we raced off after him! When we reached the food hall, he had stopped and was on his phone. But it wasn't him. Both hubby and I made eye contact just to be sure, but it was someone else.
It got us thinking, in light of Vebe seeing Tine earlier this year, that wouldn't it be funny if he was living right here in the Bondi Junction area all this time, and we'd never run into him!
I will keep you posted of course if anything does happen. 0 -
Oh and also, if anyone does have any info or questions and would rather talk to me in private, please feel free to PM me. All correspondence will be in the strictest confidence, if that's what you'd prefer. Just in case anyone feels they'd rather talk to me privately, that's all. 0
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Hi VeBe, thanks for the update! I look forward to hearing any news that might help us find Phil
It's interesting what you say about being alert. It's 3 weeks since we thought we saw "Phil" at Bondi Junction, and after that we resolved to keep more of look out while out and about, anywhere really.
Since then I've seen quite a few more people I know of than before, and that includes an old work mate from 10 years ago. She said she saw me about 6 months ago, but I walked right passed her (haha, in one of my at the shops sort of dazes no doubt!). How embarrassment!!
Our anniversary was actually in July just gone, but the party we're planning will be this January. A few of the wedding guests live overseas now, so holding it in early January means they can schedule family trips home for Xmas at the same time.
Plus it gives us a bit more time to locate Phil. We've reserved a couple of slots for him, on the off chance he comes to light 0 -
First up, a BIG thanks to Niamh and the admin team. I had a real job getting this account set up, I tried joining during the recent DDOS attack, couldn't get my login to work, or get activation emails to arrive, and then on top of that my webmail went on the blink for days in the middle of all! But, 2 weeks later, I'm here now!
So, yeah, anyways, hi MandiT, sorry in advance that I can't help you with finding Phil, BUT I was at the fine establishment that is the Tea Gardens Hotel during the time period of your interest, and I did know a certain beautiful blonde feisty young Irish lass who was working there! You see like other people I get onto google every now and then to see if I can find out what happened to people I once knew from those days. Look, I'll cut to the chase and say that I had a MASSIVE crush on the aforementioned girl. But she was out of my league, even if she was the very down to earth girl next door, and not the next Miranda Kerr in the making, or should I say Kirsten Dunst, since her very name has been spoken here before!
Ok, so, I say she was out of my league, but the truth is she just wasn't into me as much as I was in her. It didn't stop me trying for her because I was well blind to that glaring realisation at the time. And I was a spelt in capital letters D-A-G! Do you know I used to sit at the bar of the Tea Gardens, late on a Saturday night, reading a book!! How bad is that? I read novels in the boisterous old Tea Gardens on rowdy Saturday nights like I was an old man in an neighbourhood pub on a Sunday afternoon! Did you ever notice me MandiT? I must have stood out like a sore thumb :rolleyes:.
Well of course you're all right, I wasn't REALLY reading those books, well I was a bit, but all that time I was bidding my time, waiting for the best time to make my make or break move on the blonde Irish lass. But would I wait until what any other sane person would think was the right time, as in a quiet time? OH NO, NOT ME!!! Naturally I waited until anything but the best time, and make my case for the girl to be my girlfriend one Saturday night, when they were at their busiest!
There I was going for it while she was trying to serve other customers who I magically thought couldn't see or hear a thing I was saying and doing when they WERE RIGHT BESIDE ME!! to make it worse, after she had already very gracefully declined my offer, I sort of kind of pleaded with her right there in the bar on a Saturday night with @#$#% knows how many dozens of people looking on Can you believe it?
It's fair to say I learned some harsh lessons about life very quickly and I'm cool recounting this story by the way because this is also happens to be an anonymous public forum!!. I felt bad bad bad about it back at the time but it was a long time ago now. I didn't do myself any favours being so public about it. I learned to be more discrete later on. To her credit the blonde lass was totally dignified about the whole thing, she never got angry, she just politely kept saying no. Look, I moved on, settled down, happily married, with a family, and probably buy coffee at the same cafe as half of you here , except you'll never know who I am 
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Well this thread has been edumacational I must say, the lass in question had her eye on someone there present! I should have known! :eek:
If the aforementioned blonde Irish lass is around Boards.ie, I'd love to hear how ya. Are you still living in Sydney or Bondi Junction? It sounds like it! Please say hello if you are around! 0 -
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Mr Magoo! WOW. Just WOW!! What a story!! I think I'm lost for words!!
It's too bad it wasn't Tine we were looking for, more people seem to know of her than Phil!
I mean if you had asked me for advice on how to approach a girl working in a busy bar, I would have said wait until it's as quiet as possible, and I remember that happening (quiet times at the Tea Gardens even on a busy Friday or Saturday night, not you speaking to her that is) but you live and you learn hey?
I don't know for sure if Tine still lives here, but @Vebe saw her in Bondi Junction about a year ago, but that doesn't necessarily mean she still lives here, she might have been visiting. It's too bad Vebe wasn't able to talk to her.
I think he gets pings when this thread updates, so maybe he'll report in with an update..
BTW, we had our anniversary party the other week. Phil was the only wedding guest we couldn't trace or contact. Still, it'd be great to hear from him if he, or someone he knows, stumbles upon this thread in the future!
I don't remember anyone sitting in the Tea Gardens reading books, were you there most nights, or only sometimes?
PS: I had some trouble logining in also, whenever I tried to post this, I was asked in login again?!?0 -
Hey Magoonosee, quite a story, I doubt I could retell that, even behind the anonymity of a discussion forum! Tell you what though, I do remember someone sometimes sitting at the bar reading books, and don't get me wrong, as it was a little unusual for Saturday nights. Did you wear glasses, and have a short back and sides sort of haircut? I was thinking you might have been reading while waiting for friends to arrive, but not the easiest time or place for reading books I thought
I'm sorry to hear you weren't able to find Phil, Mandi. If I'd been a bit more with it the day I saw Tine at Bondi Junction, maybe things might have turned out differently. I was having a four way brain snap when I saw her though. I was on the phone to a friend in Europe, and we'd been playing telephone tag for the last week or so, but needed to discuss a serious property issue. I was also late to meet someone else, and then when I saw Tine, for the first time in 15 years, having only asked about her here a few days earlier, I think my brain circuits overloaded (and it doesn't take much for that to happen!).
It seems I was babbling incoherently, my friend was asking why I was saying things like "I don't know if it's her, but it might be, her eyes look the same". I don't even remember saying that! Dufus or what. I think I was out of it for days after, I've just re-read the posts here I made at the time, I can't think why I wrote what I did now.
Also, she was alone. I said "not exactly alone". I think I was trying to be metaphorical. I work as a writer so maybe that's why.
Coincidentally, I had been called up for jury duty that week, and was thinking I'd not be to focus at all on the case after that. As it happened, my panel was called into a trial room, a fraud matter, but my juror number wasn't called, so I missed making the jury. Just as well on that occasion I think!0 -
Thanks for the thoughts, MandiT. Oh, and I'm sorry you didn't find your friend in time. But as you say, he might come to light one day in the future!
Aye, but its one thing to give me advice, another for me to follow it lol!!!MandiT wrote:I mean if you had asked me for advice on how to approach a girl working in a busy bar, I would have said wait until it's as quiet as possible
Oh, I'm not sure if I'd want to see her again, I'm still trying to live down the last time lol!!!MandiT wrote:I don't know for sure if Tine still lives here, but @Vebe saw her in Bondi Junction about a year ago It sounds like she's still in Sydney and that surprised me, I thought she would have gone home years ago!
Some candour there my friend in an anonymous public forumVeBe wrote:It seems I was babbling incoherently, my friend was asking why I was saying things like "I don't know if it's her, but it might be, her eyes look the same". I don't even remember saying that! Dufus or what.. She obviously hasn't lost her charm after 16 years lol!! So, you're a writer? If you ever write a book about this, count me in as a reader! I may even go to the Tea Gardens to read it, if I ever get back over that way!!! 0 -
Sorry all, I forgot to reply this point yesterday=
Lol, on my lawyer's advice, I invoke my right under the Fifth Amendment not to answer, on the grounds I may incriminate myself!! Lol, but seriously sir, good memory.VeBe wrote:Did you wear glasses, and have a short back and sides sort of haircut?
Lol, I got some weird looks, but what can I say, I needed an excuse, any excuse, to be at the Tea Gardens on a Saturday night!!! What could be better than a chance to read books!!!VeBe wrote:and don't get me wrong, as it was a little unusual for Saturday nights 0 -
I tried to login a week ago, but couldn't for some reason, and I haven't been able to get back here since.VeBe wrote:If I'd been a bit more with it the day I saw Tine at Bondi Junction, maybe things might have turned out differently.
I wouldn't worry too much about that, I think I was as surprised as you to find out Tine is/might be still in the area. Besides, she mightn't have even known Phil, let alone where he is now. Like I said before, it's possible I've walked right her at the shops, assuming she has been local all this time, and not even noticed, though I very much doubt she'd know me from a bar of soap!
Funny that story about jury duty!!
Mr Magoo! I told hubby about you, and he too remembers seeing someone reading at the bar. Apparently he pointed you out to Phil, who said something like, 'oh yes, it's a very Irish thing!' So maybe not so weird after all?!?!0 -
Lol, Phil would know, by the sounds of it!!MandiT wrote:Apparently he pointed you out to Phil, who said something like, 'oh yes, it's a very Irish thing!' Either you're very Irish by sitting in crazy busy pubs on Saturday nights reading books, or chatting up Ireland's finest lasses!!
Do you still go to the Tea Gardens these days MandiT? May be we should organise a reunion, in which we all meet each other for the first time in real life, sometime there Lol 0 -
A reunion? At the Tea Gardens? I suppose that could be arranged? Somehow. @Vebe, what do you say to that? 0
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A reunion of people who've never met, but were at the same place, at the same time, years ago? I like it! I'm not sure if this fits in with the timeframe anyone else had in mind, but I'll be in Sydney later in the week, and could drop by the TGs for a quick one, a VB of course, this Thursday at around 9:30PM. Not exactly a family friendly time I know, especially on a school night, but I'll be in the usual place, main downstairs bar. They seem to discourage sitting at the actual bar these days, but I'll be as close to it as I can. We can always arrange another time, but if you're about on Thursday, you know where to find me, for half an hour or so, at least PM me for contact deets if you want. 0
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Tomorrow night? You're keen! But it sounds like you'll be going passed anyway. We might be able to get there, it's 50/50 at the moment, we're having dinner at Coogee at 7pm, but if we're back in BJ by 9:30pm give or take, we'll sure poke our heads in the door downstairs.
From memory it's normally pretty quiet in there on a Thursday at that time, if we think we see you, we'll say hi. If that doesn't work, I'll PM you through boards, so check your alerts Thurs night! 0 -
Lol Vebe, I didn't mean right away, I thought it would take months & months to arrange something like this, even if there is beer involved!! But it sounds like you were going to be there anyway. I gotta get myself back over County Bondi way one of these days first!! When I know when that might be, I'll let you know, and we can fix something up!! 0
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