Being too attached to your local area.

LadyLucinda

I am not the most well traveled person out there but at the same time I do know that it will not be the end of the world if I don't end up settling down in my local village. The thing is that I have a group of friends whose lives revolve around working, living, drinking and most importantly playing GAA with the local team. They could easily work at what they are working at here in another country but the idea wouldn't even enter their heads. They drink in the same pubs every weekend and the same night club for years.

I am thinking about heading off to Australia or New Zeland soon but I wouldn't even bother asking them to come with me. I may not be so smart when I am abroad but I do think that if I do head off that I wouldn't miss the place too much, if at all. I would be very surprised if any of them even left the province to work and would expect them all to be at home for the rest of their lives. I actually find this quite sad.

Is this normal?

Legs.Eleven

Perfectly normal. Some people are home birds, some aren't. Nothing sad about it in the slightest.

wazky

Is it not natural to want to spread your seed around?, otherwise we would be all inbred.

umop.episdn

wazky wrote: »

Is it not natural to want to spread your seed around?, otherwise we would be all inbred.

Technically we are all a little inbred, we're all 14th cousins or better in Europe I believe

orangesoda

I quit playing the gaelic football when I was a teen, I'm glad I did as I had a very limited mind set, I viewed the next parish as foreign and I hated leaving the area.
I have no trouble living in other countries but I remain proud of my native home.

p.s. everyone in my area are cousins, my friend actually had intercourse with his 3rd cousin

Merkin

I'd find those levels of parochialism boring in the extreme but each to their own.

And asking is it 'normal' is pretty subjective, whatever makes people happy is cool as long as they're not harming anyone

Nonoperational

If they're happy, then it's not for anyone else to judge. I know what you're saying, but each to their own.

Duckworth_Luas

When I was a teenager I left my home town, it was the happiest day of my life.

Some years later it was obvious that I'd never live in my home town again. It was the saddest day of my life.

umop.episdn

Duckworth_Luas wrote: »

When I was a teenager I left my home town, it was the happiest day of my life.

Some years later it was obvious that I'd never live in my home town again. It was the saddest day of my life.

Brigadoon?

Duckworth_Luas

umop.episdn wrote: »

Brigadoon?

Chernobyl

Adamantium

Video seems approriate to your situation OP.

"I'm afraid of dying in this place"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXxw-zXRqOs

Rasheed

I'm a self confessed home bird. Even when I was younger and had the chance to travel I didn't see the appeal. I'm still living in the same area I grew up in, mixing with the sane people and a lot of the social life revolves around the football club.

Yeah I get slagged for it but that's just me and I don't really care. I like where I live, I like being close to my extended family and friends. Some want to travel, best of luck & bring me back a stick of rock, but I'm happy toddling along in my little parish.

LadyLucinda

Nothing wrong with what they are doing but I just think there is a bit more to life that playing football and drinking. the more you can drink the cooler you are as well. and you have to make sure that facebook and snapchat knows about how often you drink as well

Gongoozler

Can't help but think the same as you op, the majority that I went to school with still hang around the same pubs, go to the same matches, talk to the same people as they did 15 / 20 years ago, I can't help but find it sad. I expect its a discomfort with trying new things.

Being a home bird is fine, as long as it's because you love home and choose it above elsewhere. It's the home birds who view everything outside their area with suspicion that tend to be the ones with the narrow world view and the narrow minds to match.

Legs.Eleven

LadyLucinda wrote: »

Nothing wrong with what they are doing but I just think there is a bit more to life that playing football and drinking. the more you can drink the cooler you are as well. and you have to make sure that facebook and snapchat knows about how often you drink as well

Many people emigrate and lead lives very much like they did in their hometown, which is also grand. I think there's a bit of a myth that when you emigrate, you automatically lead an exciting, adventurous lives when it's often the case that you get settled somewhere, get a routine and end up doing the stuff you did before but somewhere different.

The Backwards Man

The whole world is my home.

LadyLucinda

Oh I know that well but there is no harm in giving it a go. The village isn't going to run away

The Backwards Man

The Backwards Man wrote: »

The whole world is my home.

He's got the whole world... in his hands.

The Backwards Man

Candie wrote: »

He's got the whole world... in his hands.

Oh, I'm not God.

It's a mistake people often make though.:pac:

shruikan2553

Im not even finished college left so there is still plenty of time but in my experience those who stayed home have done absolutely nothing. Their lives are no different than when they were doing their leaving cert. They go out to the same pubs with the same people every weekend. The biggest thing they might have managed is having a child. There are those who prefer to stay nearby but at least they have tried something new and just like the location.

riffmongous

shruikan2553 wrote: »

Im not even finished college left so there is still plenty of time but in my experience those who stayed home have done absolutely nothing. Their lives are no different than when they were doing their leaving cert. They go out to the same pubs with the same people every weekend. The biggest thing they might have managed is having a child. There are those who prefer to stay nearby but at least they have tried something new and just like the location.

Depends what you want from live I guess, if someone is happy with such a life well good for them.

J_E

I live in Portlaoise. Staying here for the rest of my life isn't an option.

Lady Spangles

LadyLucinda wrote: »

I am not the most well traveled person out there but at the same time I do know that it will not be the end of the world if I don't end up settling down in my local village. The thing is that I have a group of friends whose lives revolve around working, living, drinking and most importantly playing GAA with the local team. They could easily work at what they are working at here in another country but the idea wouldn't even enter their heads. They drink in the same pubs every weekend and the same night club for years.

I am thinking about heading off to Australia or New Zeland soon but I wouldn't even bother asking them to come with me. I may not be so smart when I am abroad but I do think that if I do head off that I wouldn't miss the place too much, if at all. I would be very surprised if any of them even left the province to work and would expect them all to be at home for the rest of their lives. I actually find this quite sad.

Is this normal?

There's nothing wrong at all with being a home bird. I wanted to leave the place I grew up in because there were very few jobs, fewer prospects and the place (Liverpool) seemed to be on the slide in general. But really, just wanted to see other places and cultures etc.

If you can imagine yourself in fifty or sixty years time, growing old and never having been anywhere, do you think you will regret it? As the old adage says, it's best to regret something you did than something you didn't.

holystungun9

Cydoniac wrote: »

I live in Portlaoise. Staying here for the rest of my life isn't an option.

Jezus! Lads, can we do some sort of sponsored walk or something to at least get him a bus fare and a few nights in a hostel. Leave no man behind!

Graces7

interesting variations. i am far far from where i grew up and will never return there. home is where i am. although happier where i am just now than anywhere else.

but ageing does that; different priorities and needs.

i think it is good to leave the nest for a while. we had vso for that although that was not for me. if you work overseas a while you can enrich the life of your home town. seen that in several folk.

but the inbreeding here! try valentia island for lookalikes, or the photos of the blaskets.

shalalala

I left my home town at 16 and now Dublin is my home. I love to travel and see new things but i am a home bird in that i am very close to my mam and i like spending time at home with my partner. I have a friend that has the same friends now that she did when she was 4 and that really does not compute with me. People change all the time and still liking all of them after that many years? I just don't get it

Daveysil15

LadyLucinda wrote: »

Nothing wrong with what they are doing but I just think there is a bit more to life that playing football and drinking. the more you can drink the cooler you are as well. and you have to make sure that facebook and snapchat knows about how often you drink as well

That's more of a reflection on our drinking culture than been a homebird though. And you'll see that in a lot of places. My cousin recently came back from Australia and he said most of the Irish he met there just watched football and got pissed at the weekends. Kind of the same thing they were doing at home but in a different country. As legs said you can move abroad and just settle into a routine.

Rasheed

shalalala wrote: »

I have a friend that has the same friends now that she did when she was 4 and that really does not compute with me. People change all the time and still liking all of them after that many years? I just don't get it

Of my three best friends, I've known one since I was 4, one since 13 and one since college. The girls I've know since four has changed the least of them all!

Puzzle35

umop.episdn wrote: »

Technically we are all a little inbred, we're all 14th cousins or better in Europe I believe

Gosh.......we Irish must be quite a bit less diluted than that again...

beach_walker

The Backwards Man wrote: »

The whole world is my home.

Not my place. Keep out of it.

J_E

holystungun9 wrote: »

Jezus! Lads, can we do some sort of sponsored walk or something to at least get him a bus fare and a few nights in a hostel. Leave no man behind!

Charity starts at home

NSAman

Candie wrote: »

Being a home bird is fine, as long as it's because you love home and choose it above elsewhere. It's the home birds who view everything outside their area with suspicion that tend to be the ones with the narrow world view and the narrow minds to match.

Candie, in my own experience this is the majority of that mindset of people.

I have lived and continue to travel for work abroad. Obviously, the fact I have been all over the world and enjoy that lifestyle seems to irk some people who claim that I am "too snobby and up myself". I never brag about places that I have been to or worked in.

On a recent visit home, I was asked what I did for a living now. In brief words I described my job. Later in the loo I hear two "friends" describing me as a blow hard... the look on their faces when I appeared from the cubicle was priceless.

These same people think it a chore to actually go to Dublin for a night out...

Each to their own. Personally I have changed but certainly now a boaster. However, home is home and family are always number one no matter where I am in the world.

Holsten

I moved around a lot when young so don't really feel attached to any area at all.

I don't really feel attached to Ireland much either. I've lived abroad and plan to again as soon as possible. Planning a life here in Ireland doesn't appeal to me at all.

Lucyfur

But.....all the sexy singles are in my area....

LizT

Lucyfur wrote: »

But.....all the sexy singles are in my area....

:eek: Mine too!!

beks101

Read thread title as 'being too attached to your local arse'
I love my local arse, my local arse is great.
I'm so hungover

Stained Class

holystungun9 wrote: »

Jezus! Lads, can we do some sort of sponsored walk or something to at least get him a bus fare and a few nights in a hostel. Leave no man behind!

Good a good laugh out of this!:D

Small towns & villages are good places to grow up in, raise kids in & retire to.

For that part of your life between 18 & 35, maybe your'e better off out of them unless you've a fairly good set up there.

I left my village at 20 & didn't know what homesickness was.

25 years later & I'm back. Married now & my kids are going to the same primary school that I went to 40 odd years ago.

Lots of their classmates parents were at school with me back in the day.

J_E

Stained Class wrote: »

Good a good laugh out of this!:D

Small towns & villages are good places to grow up in, raise kids in & retire to.

I definitely agree!!!




Unless it's Portlaoise.

Mint Aero

umop.episdn wrote: »

Technically we are all a little inbred, we're all 14th cousins or better in Europe I believe

Who cares.

suicide_circus

Some people think that climbing matthew pikachu or a year in some irish ghetto outside sydney or "helping" to build an orphanage in burkino faso makes them a more rounded person with a deeper understanding of the human condition and the mysteries of the universe. It dosnt.
Some of the most vapid and soulless tossers I have ever met have been all round the world. Some of the wisest and kindest people I've met have hardly left their village.

Temptamperu

I get a weird feeling when i am not in Ireland. I have been on holidays all around Ireland and never got the same feeling. But 20 minutes on a boat or plane I just get a mad weird feeling and then I make a little sick.

MJ23

There's lads I know and they wouldn't be more than a mile away from home from one end of the year to the next. If they were dropped off on a road a few miles out of town, you'd think they were in outer space. They're lemmings, obsessed with soccer who drink in the same pub every night, and talk shyte to the other lemmings about "us" and "we" when referring to English Premier League football team. Poor fools couldn't point out their beloved team on a map of England.

I can't wait to move back to my home area, only moved out of home at 24 (and didn't really want to) to do a course a few hours away. I'm 5 years gone now and still head home most weekends, use most of my holidays to head home for longer periods of time etc and I'm just watching now for an opportunity to get a job and settle back home again, building a house beside my home place being something high on my list of things to do.

Personally I don't understands peoples desire to move away, especially abroad. The thought alone if having to move abroad would nearly turn my stomach.

Being close to my family, extended family and friends (most of whom are atill around, building houses at their home places etc) are important things to me.

ivytwine

As Candie said, it's grand and it suits some people, but the headwrecking thing is a narrowminded homebird. Someone who couldn't invisage going out with someone from the next parish, that kind of thing.

I know people like that at home, heading to Limerick is a big deal ffs! I couldn't live like that but then I was always seen as a bit of weirdo at home.

Ihatecuddles

My best friend is the biggest homebird I've ever met. Another friend said she wanted to travel for 2 years, so the homebird said she would too. Everyone was worried about her, saying she'd never make it there and if she did she'd be home within the month.

She loves it, and I'm so glad my friend talked her into it. She's quite anxious and nervous by nature. Its doing her the world of good, she's there nearly a year.

I always wanted to travel, now I'm getting married and it won't ever be an option.

Legs.Eleven

mauzo! wrote: »

My best friend is the biggest homebird I've ever met. Another friend said she wanted to travel for 2 years, so the homebird said she would too. Everyone was worried about her, saying she'd never make it there and if she did she'd be home within the month.

She loves it, and I'm so glad my friend talked her into it. She's quite anxious and nervous by nature. Its doing her the world of good, she's there nearly a year.

I always wanted to travel, now I'm getting married and it won't ever be an option.

You can do it when you're older though after they've all grown up!

Ihatecuddles

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

You can do it when you're older though after they've all grown up!

I'm marrying a homebird. So it will have to wait until after the divorce!


(Clearly a joke!!!)

mauzo!

mauzo! wrote: »

I'm marrying a homebird. So it will have to wait until after the divorce!


(Clearly a joke!!!)

Must be any day now? Hope you got your house sorted so you have somewhere to be homebirds together.

kowloon

Attachment to family, pets, a career, a hobby that doesn't travel, there are plenty of reasons people can't live out of a backpack. That said, we all know people who don't like being away from the familiar. You'll meet plenty of them in Oz and NZ too.

Fox_In_Socks

I suppose where ever you go in the world, you will fall into a routine and become a homebird there.

Otherwise become a rail hopping tramp!:pac: