Cost of Months Mind mass?

chris_john_lane

Hi just want to ask how much would you normally give the priest for this mass, or anything at all?

ABajaninCork

Bung him a twenty if the priest is your PP. If not, then fifty.

chris_john_lane

ABajaninCork wrote: »

Bung him a twenty if the priest is your PP. If not, then fifty.

Thanks, is this mass part of a normal mass or separate?

ABajaninCork

They normally dedicate the mass to the person you want the Month's Mind for.

katydid

ABajaninCork wrote: »

They normally dedicate the mass to the person you want the Month's Mind for.

You mean they mention the person's name in a mass they're saying anyway..

ABajaninCork

Yes.

katydid

ABajaninCork wrote: »

Yes.

So why pay anything?

ABajaninCork

As a consideration for the priest? You don't have to pay, but we generally do.

katydid

ABajaninCork wrote: »

As a consideration for the priest? You don't have to pay, but we generally do.

But if he's saying the mass anyway, and just has to take five seconds to mention a name, what's to consider? Why would you pay him to say two words?

ABajaninCork

I'm not getting into it with you. Either you give the priest money or you don't. No skin off my nose. And the OP's question has been answered to his satisfaction. Over a month ago.

katydid

Just wondering why you would...it makes no sense to me to pay someone for saying two words. It's not as if they actually care, or think about the person. The priest got my mother's name wrong at her month's mind; he didn't even know her or take the trouble to get her name right. It's just a joke

Harry Angstrom

katydid wrote: »

Just wondering why you would...it makes no sense to me to pay someone for saying two words. It's not as if they actually care, or think about the person. The priest got my mother's name wrong at her month's mind; he didn't even know her or take the trouble to get her name right. It's just a joke

Was your mother a regular church-goer? If she wasn't a regular church-goer, then you can't necessarily blame the priest for not knowing her.


To the OP:

A lot of priests will go to the trouble of taking time out to say a Month's Mind Mass at a time which suits the family. Often, it can be celebrated with just the family themselves outside of normal Mass times. If that's the case, then the priest deserves a few bob for going to the time and effort of doing this. I can't speak for every parish, I can only speak from my own experience.

byronbay2

katydid wrote: »

Just wondering why you would...it makes no sense to me to pay someone for saying two words. It's not as if they actually care, or think about the person. The priest got my mother's name wrong at her month's mind; he didn't even know her or take the trouble to get her name right. It's just a joke

Well, I hope you got your nothing back!!!

Turtwig

katydid wrote: »

Just wondering why you would...it makes no sense to me to pay someone for saying two words. It's not as if they actually care, or think about the person. The priest got my mother's name wrong at her month's mind; he didn't even know her or take the trouble to get her name right. It's just a joke

It's very unfair to generalise an entire profession based on the actions of one individual which may have been an honest mistake. In any case, priests rely on community donations to keep them going some folk donate as they feel necessary.

Arbiter of Good Taste

Giving a donation is a decent thing to do. If you resent it, the perhaps considering a different way to mark the occasion is more appropriate for you.

katydid

Harry Angstrom wrote: »

Was your mother a regular church-goer? If she wasn't a regular church-goer, then you can't necessarily blame the priest for not knowing her.


To the OP:

A lot of priests will go to the trouble of taking time out to say a Month's Mind Mass at a time which suits the family. Often, it can be celebrated with just the family themselves outside of normal Mass times. If that's the case, then the priest deserves a few bob for going to the time and effort of doing this. I can't speak for every parish, I can only speak from my own experience.

She certainly was. As was my father. They both attended mass regularly in the parish where their months mind and anniversary masses took place. And when it came to the anniversary mass for my father, the priest FORGOT he was going to be away that weekend. His attitude basically was "well, what can I do about it"? The local nuns came to the rescue and let us have the mass in their house, with a priest who was a friend of the family.

At the time of my father's funeral, we had wanted that same priest to participate in the funeral mass - my father was very involved in scouting, and knew lots of priests through it - but the local parish priest refused to allow any "strange" priest on "his" altar.

Basically the attitude of the local clergy to both my parents, devout people and regular church attenders, was shabby, to put it mildly.

And people wonder why so many of us are cynical about the clergy?

Benny_Cake

katydid wrote: »

She certainly was. As was my father. They both attended mass regularly in the parish where their months mind and anniversary masses took place. And when it came to the anniversary mass for my father, the priest FORGOT he was going to be away that weekend. His attitude basically was "well, what can I do about it"? The local nuns came to the rescue and let us have the mass in their house, with a priest who was a friend of the family.

At the time of my father's funeral, we had wanted that same priest to participate in the funeral mass - my father was very involved in scouting, and knew lots of priests through it - but the local parish priest refused to allow any "strange" priest on "his" altar.

Basically the attitude of the local clergy to both my parents, devout people and regular church attenders, was shabby, to put it mildly.

And people wonder why so many of us are cynical about the clergy?

Very bad form on the part of the PP.

The reality is that in any job/vocation there will be people who are difficult to deal with or who are completely unsuited to the role. There's no reason to believe that clergy of any stripe would be any different. In my experience most priests are decent types, but there will always be a few bad ones.

katydid

Benny_Cake wrote: »

Very bad form on the part of the PP.

The reality is that in any job/vocation there will be people who are difficult to deal with or who are completely unsuited to the role. There's no reason to believe that clergy of any stripe would be any different. In my experience most priests are decent types, but there will always be a few bad ones.

Oh, I agree with you entirely. The difference is that in most jobs/v ocations you have to do interviews etc. and prove yourself to the people you will work for and with. In the Roman Catholic church these parish priests are appointed without any consultation from the parishioners, and you end up with situations like the one I mentioned.

Most clergy are fine, decent people, and deserve, like any of us, to be paid for extra work they do. But inserting a person's name into a mass they are saying anyway (sometimes in a long litany of people's names, as happened at my aunt's anniversary mass) is not the same as going out of your way to say a special mass for the family outside of ordinary mass times. A priest should not be paid for mentioning a name.

martinedwards

As a prod, I find threads like these very interesting.......

shocking, stunning and bewildering....

but always interesting!

ryan101

I don't know anything about this priest, as he's not here to defend himself.

What I do know is that a month's mind mass, like the funeral mass, is a special mass dedicated to the soul of the faithful departed. Priests will also read out the names of people who's anniversary's occur at that time at other masses, so people can say prayers for them, this is not the same as saying a mass for someone. It is customary to give a small donation to the Priest for saying a mass for a loved one, about €5-20 or suchlike, but it's optional, especially if you can't afford it and explain that.

Protestants may find it puzzling that we pray for our departed loved ones, but it is scriptural, and has been done from the earliest times of the Church. Protestant ministers have to live on donations too, and scripture is quite clear about not muzzling the ox that treads the corn.

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

I don't know anything about this priest, as he's not here to defend himself.

What I do know is that a month's mind mass, like the funeral mass, is a special mass dedicated to the soul of the faithful departed. Priests will also read out the names of people who's anniversary's occur at that time at other masses, so people can say prayers for them, this is not the same as saying a mass for someone. It is customary to give a small donation to the Priest for saying a mass for a loved one, about €5-20 or suchlike, but it's optional, especially if you can't afford it and explain that.

Protestants may find it puzzling that we pray for our departed loved ones, but it is scriptural, and has been done from the earliest times of the Church. Protestant ministers have to live on donations too, and scripture is quite clear about not muzzling the ox that treads the corn.

Come off it, do you seriously think that the priest saying the mass is doing any more than just saying the person's name. Whatever the theological difference, the reality is that all the priest does is say a name. On that basis, there is no reason to give him any money unless he is saying an extra mass, just for that person.

Of course Protestants understand praying for departed ones. We do it every Sunday in the Intercessions, and often informally. Just this morning, our priest remembered one of our parishioners who passed away a few months ago. She remembered him because some of his family members from abroad were in the congregation; no one paid her to do so.

Protestant ministers don't have to live on donations; they are paid a salary.

ryan101

katydid wrote: »

Come off it, do you seriously think that the priest saying the mass is doing any more than just saying the person's name. Whatever the theological difference, the reality is that all the priest does is say a name. On that basis, there is no reason to give him any money unless he is saying an extra mass, just for that person.

Protestant ministers don't have to live on donations; they are paid a salary.

Ah, I get what your angle is now . . .

Do you pray for people ? Family, friends ?
When you pray for a person do you think it's just about saying someone's name ?

Where does the money for Protestant ministers come from ?

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

Ah, I get what your angle is now . . .

Do you pray for people ? Family, friends ?
When you pray for a person do you think it's just about saying someone's name ?

Where does the money for Protestant ministers come from ?

When I pray for a person, I pray for them because I cared for them. I don't just mention their name in the course of a liturgy. And if I were to do that, I wouldn't expect anyone to give me money for doing so. Many priests just rattle off names without even knowing them, which makes a joke of the idea.

Protestant ministers get paid from the money paid every year by parishes, which is paid into a central fund. The amount per parish depends on the number of registered parishioners. There are also some managed funds, but less than there used Every clergy person gets paid a set sum, depending on their job. And of course there are quite a few non-stipendiary ministers and lay ministers who help keep the show on the road.

ryan101

katydid wrote: »

When I pray for a person, I pray for them because I cared for them. I don't just mention their name in the course of a liturgy.

But someone could come along and continuely accuse you of doing no such thing, and just 'mentioning their name' when you pray. What would you do in response ?

katydid wrote: »

Protestant ministers get paid from the money paid every year by parishes, which is paid into a central fund. The amount per parish depends on the number of registered parishioners. There are also some managed funds, but less than there used Every clergy person gets paid a set sum, depending on their job. And of course there are quite a few non-stipendiary ministers and lay ministers who help keep the show on the road.

Yes, but from who does this money come from ?

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

But someone could come along and continuely accuse you of doing no such thing, and just 'mentioning their name' when you pray. What would you do in response ?



Yes, but from who does this money come from ?

I would be annoyed, of course. But then I wouldn't do it, unlike many priests who rattle off names of people they don't even know. And don't tell me that doesn't happen, because I've come across it way too often.

The money form the parishes comes from contributions from the parishioners. Not donations for praying for people or for signing cards. Contributions to the common purse for the benefit of having someone care for the parish.

ryan101

katydid wrote: »

I would be annoyed, of course. But then I wouldn't do it,.

But if you were continuously accused of doing it, and weren't, what would you do ?

katydid wrote: »

The money form the parishes comes from contributions from the parishioners. Not donations for praying for people or for signing cards. Contributions to the common purse for the benefit of having someone care for the parish.

But do Catholic priests not care for their parish as well ?

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

But if you were continuously accused of doing it, and weren't, what would you do ?



But do Catholic priests not care for their parish as well ?

Of course. And they should be paid properly. A proper salary, paid for by their parishioners as a matter of course, not in dribs and drabs by handouts for mass cards, anniversary masses and the like.

ryan101

katydid wrote: »

Of course. And they should be paid properly. A proper salary, paid for by their parishioners as a matter of course, not in dribs and drabs by handouts for mass cards, anniversary masses and the like.

Our local priest is paid a salary, it's in the annual accounts for the parish, we get a copy of them once a year in our news letter, mind you it's well below minimum wage for the hours he puts in and being on call 24/7, so I'd say he's very glad of the top ups.

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

Our local priest is paid a salary, it's in the annual accounts for the parish, we get a copy of them once a year in our news letter, mind you it's well below minimum wage for the hours he puts in and being on call 24/7, so I'd say he's very glad of the top ups.

That's the profession he chose. We all put in extra hours without pay. It doesn't justify taking money for saying names of people you don't even know, or signing cards for people you've never heard of. (Pre-signing, in many cases, in fact, which is an absolute scandal)

hotmail.com

50?

Wow.

ryan101

katydid wrote: »

That's the profession he chose. We all put in extra hours without pay. It doesn't justify taking money for saying names of people you don't even know, or signing cards for people you've never heard of. (Pre-signing, in many cases, in fact, which is an absolute scandal)

We've a very good priest and the vast majority of priests I've come across have been very decent. The foreign mission cards are always presigned, but the names are sent on to the priest in question. I know one missionary priest that was able to help a good deal of his very poor parishioners with that money, we seen the videos of the shelters he got built for them. People that had no homes. You shouldn't keep trying to tar everyone with the same brush, you wouldn't like it done to you.

Benny_Cake

katydid wrote: »

That's the profession he chose. We all put in extra hours without pay. It doesn't justify taking money for saying names of people you don't even know, or signing cards for people you've never heard of. (Pre-signing, in many cases, in fact, which is an absolute scandal)

What exactly is the objection here? If a Catholic, of their own free will, wants to give a few euro to a priest to have a loved one's name read out at Mass, let them at it. There needs to be a bit of ecumenical live and let live with stuff like this.

Edit: I was curious as to how much a Catholic priest is paid, €24k gross for a curate in Dublin apparently. That includes accommodation and health insurance, but still, no one would be in it for the money. Which is probably a good thing of course.

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/priests-pay-is-cut-as-collections-at-mass-fall-26790910.html

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

We've a very good priest and the vast majority of priests I've come across have been very decent. The foreign mission cards are always presigned, but the names are sent on to the priest in question. I know one missionary priest that was able to help a good deal of his very poor parishioners with that money, we seen the videos of the shelters he got built for them. People that had no homes. You shouldn't keep trying to tar everyone with the same brush, you wouldn't like it done to you.

I'm sure they're very good. Most priests are. It's not about goodness. It's about simple numbers; no matter how good they are, they can't possibly know everyone in the parish, so they can't possibly be genuine when they pray for certain people. So their mentioning their names during the course of a mass is hypocritical, and taking money for it is adding insults to injury.

You seriously think it's ok for some priest in a foreign country to get names of people he has never heard of or laid eyes one and mention their names in a mass with any kind of sincerity, or that it's ok for them to take money for it? I find the notion appalling; not simony, but not far off. If people want to send money to missionary priests, surely there are other ways than facilitating this kind of thing?

I certainly don't tar everyone with the one brush. My point is that people who do work should get paid for it; if a priest says an extra mass for a person to remember them, which involves liaising with the family, getting to know them and through them, the deceased, even if they didn't know them while they were alive. On the other hand, priests who take money for saying names of people they neither know nor care about, who sign cards not even knowing who the deceased will be who will be remembered in the card are in a different category?

katydid

Benny_Cake wrote: »

What exactly is the objection here? If a Catholic, of their own free will, wants to give a few euro to a priest to have a loved one's name read out at Mass, let them at it. There needs to be a bit of ecumenical live and let live with stuff like this.

What's wrong with it is that it is not far off simony. The priest is taking money for doing something he's doing anyway, which is saying mass. Or taking money for pre-signing a blank card, with no idea who the recipient will be. In my opinion, people who support that kind of thing are wrong. It is demeaning to the deceased and their families.

Nothing wrong with being ecumenical, but when you see certain practices you believe to be wrong, it would be dishonest not to speak out about them.

ryan101

You know what I see with our own priest at home, and he's a very decent man, no matter how how hard he works and the good that he does, there is always someone complaining about him. You couldn't please some people.

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

You know what I see with our own priest at home, and he's a very decent man, no matter how how hard he works and the good that he does, there is always someone complaining about him. You couldn't please some people.

You'll find that's the case with most jobs. Not really relevant to this discussion though. Anyone who does a good job should get commensurate recognition, financial or otherwise, and someone who takes shortcuts should not. And priests who throw in a persons name as a by the way during mass, instead of saying a special one for the family, should not get paid.

ryan101

Well we don't have any proof that's what he's doing, and he's not here to defend himself

katydid

ryan101 wrote: »

Well we don't have any proof that's what he's doing, and he's not here to defend himself

Who? We're talking in general here, about principles, not any specific priest