Angry parent entered school ranting like a lunatic

Felicity1

An angry parent, upset over an alleged bullying incident directed at her child, burst into my child's primary school classroom during lessons and proceeded to roar at all the class in a threatening manner.

She gained access to the locked school as she is a member of the board of management. :mad:

The BOM has been notified of the incident and requests for her immediate resignation have been issued by several parents.

Obviously, her actions have upset the children and their parents. They were left in shock and tears. Many did not want to return to school the next day.

The parent has not apologised for her actions.

Other than reprimanding the parent, does the school have to report the incident to the HSE, Gardai, or other groups? Do her actions warrant a garda caution? Can she be barred from the school grounds?

The parent is involved in several community groups that interact with children. I no longer feel she is fit to work with my child or anyone else's. Is it fair to ask for her removal during events on child protection grounds, even if the incident occurred outside of those activities?

Any advice would be welcome. Many thanks.

Banjoxed

Give the bullies a good boot in the hole. That would be a good start.

Felicity1

The consensus among the class seems to be that the child and the mother are the bullies.

I have considered a good kick up the backside, but that probably isn't the best option for all involved.

Alias G

Banjoxed wrote: »

Give the bullies a good boot in the hole. That would be a good start.

It would be great if solutions were as simple as that.

AerynSun

Felicity1 wrote: »

The consensus among the class seems to be that the child and the mother are the bullies.

I have considered a good kick up the backside, but that probably isn't the best option for all involved.

If the consensus among the class is that the child is the bully, then to my mind that kinda bears out the child's experience of being 'othered' and bullied by the group?

If the children were willing to engage in a conversation about what has been happening, and admit that there have been choices made on all sides that have been hurtful to everyone, that would be a far healthier measure of the situation. IMO.

Bicycle

The school should have a set of policies or procedures available for all parents to see.

Within these policies should be guidelines on bullying and how to make a complaint to the school.

Follow these procedures to the letter. Make sure you do everything as prescribed. You may need to take some legal advice as well.

Is there a Parents Association or Parents Council? You should make contact with the chairperson and/or secretary as well.

You should write a factual and unemotive letter to the principal of the school. The letter should be registered. All of the other parents who feel upset by the situation should do the same.

If your child is suffering from anxiety as a result of the episode, get the child assessed by a professional and get their observations down on headed paper.

No good principal or board of management will want something like this happening in their school.

Felicity1

AerynSun wrote: »

If the children were willing to engage in a conversation about what has been happening, and admit that there have been choices made on all sides that have been hurtful to everyone, that would be a far healthier measure of the situation. IMO.

Your point is valid. I do not know if the bullying happened or not. My issue is with the outrageous conduct of the parent.

my friend

Felicity1 wrote: »

Your point is valid. I do not know if the bullying happened or not. My issue is with the outrageous conduct of the parent.

I think there's more to your side of this story

I'd decline to comment until you furnish same Felicity

Felicity1

my friend wrote: »

I think there's more to your side of this story

I'd decline to comment until you furnish same Felicity

My child is in the class, witnessed all the carry-on, was upset by it, but not involved in the bullying allegations.

AerynSun

Felicity1 wrote: »

My issue is with the outrageous conduct of the parent.

The parent's conduct does need to be addressed. I only hope that the child's experience doesn't get lost in the cloud of outrage about the mother.

Kettleson

"Angry" "Burst into" "roar" "threatening" "gained access locked school".... These allegations witnessed by whom? Presumably only the pupils? and reported to the parents who then made a subsequent report of what went on?

Where was the class teacher? Need more facts on this one.

PS: I'd make a guess that this "threatening parent" was given permission by to speak to the class. If she didn't have permission I'd call in the Garda and report the incident to the Dept of Education. But my hunch is that she was given permission to speak to the class.

Felicity1

Kettleson wrote: »

"Angry" "Burst into" "roar" "threatening" "gained access locked school".... These allegations witnessed by whom? Presumably only the pupils? and reported to the parents who then made a subsequent report of what went on?

Where was the class teacher? Need more facts on this one.

PS: I'd make a guess that this "threatening parent" was given permission by to speak to the class. If she didn't have permission I'd call in the Garda and report the incident to the Dept of Education. But my hunch is that she was given permission to speak to the class.

Witnessed by students, teachers, principal, staff. Principal has confirmed it. She was not given access but had the keypad entry code to the front door since she is on the BOM. She was not invited in.

Edited to add: The teacher was in the room when the parent came in.

Kettleson

Felicity1 wrote: »

Witnessed by students, teachers, principal, staff. Principal has confirmed it. She was not given access but had the keypad entry code to the front door since she is on the BOM. She was not invited in.

Edited to add: The teacher was in the room when the parent came in.

Oh dear...if that's true, its a serious incident with lots of issues to sort out including possible criminal charges.

Greenmachine

Kettleson wrote: »

Oh dear...if that's true, its a serious incident with lots of issues to sort out including possible criminal charges.

Crazy carry on. Those poor kids. Threatening and abusive behavior in a public place. Perhaps campaign to withdraw kid from any and all activities that she is involved in. Refuse to send any children to the school till she is removed from the board of management.

marienbad

Jeez people , get a grip , police charges ? A parent lost the rag , get over it.
Don't worry the toddlers weren't traumatised and will get over it quicker than the parents seem too.

Kettleson

marienbad wrote: »

Jeez people , get a grip , police charges ? A parent lost the rag , get over it.
Don't worry the toddlers weren't traumatised and will get over it quicker than the parents seem too.

If its true what the OP has said then the incident should not go unchallenged. Children should not be subjected to such behaviour and the school has a responsibility to account for what happened.

Allyall

marienbad wrote: »

Jeez people , get a grip , police charges ? A parent lost the rag , get over it.
Don't worry the toddlers weren't traumatised and will get over it quicker than the parents seem too.

It wasn't just a Parent, it was a member of the Board of Management. Obviously unable to control her temper, and (ab)used the items she was given, for personal use.
She should have discussed it first with other members/staff or a solicitor if she wanted to go down that route. It sounds like she took her Childs word at face value (Can't blame her for that), and then marched down to the School without thinking.

She should have her keys/codes and anything else revoked until it has been discussed by other members and staff.
Personally, I would want her gone, someone that is likely to go off on one like that at the simplest thing, is not someone you want on a Board of Management. Need more level-headedness.

Kristopherus

marienbad wrote: »

Jeez people , get a grip , police charges ? A parent lost the rag , get over it.
Don't worry the toddlers weren't traumatised and will get over it quicker than the parents seem too.

Rubbish. I know of no instance where a parent can barge into a school a berate the kids. That parent, IMO, should be reported to the Gardai, so that they will have a record of it. Then the parents should make contact with the other organisations and ask them to review the Garda Vetting Cert in the light of this incident. She must have a Garda Vetting Cert if any of the other organisations she's involved with have dealings with children.

The School authorities have to take a firm stand as well.

JONJO THE MISER

marienbad wrote: »

Jeez people , get a grip , police charges ? A parent lost the rag , get over it.
Don't worry the toddlers weren't traumatised and will get over it quicker than the parents seem too.

Yes police charges, it was serious what she done.
The woman needs to be taken down a step or two, ive seen her type before, thinks she runs her community and can do what she wants and dictate to other people.
Report her to the guards and the department.

Manach

Fair play to the parent. Kids who are subjected to bullying often suffered for years before this is brought to light or acted upon. By taking a positive step to confront the bullies and then have this action reach their parents, that person is taking personal responsibly to protect their child.

Hanalei

Manach wrote: »

Fair play to the parent. Kids who are subjected to bullying often suffered for years before this is brought to light or acted upon. By taking a positive step to confront the bullies and then have this action reach their parents, that person is taking personal responsibly to protect their child.

An adult intimidating children under the age of 12 is now seen as a "positive step"?

Kettleson

Manach wrote: »

Fair play to the parent. Kids who are subjected to bullying often suffered for years before this is brought to light or acted upon. By taking a positive step to confront the bullies and then have this action reach their parents, that person is taking personal responsibly to protect their child.

What!! There are procedures for dealing with such issues. This person (allegedly) followed none of them.

dinnyirwin

Felicity1 wrote: »

An angry parent, upset over an alleged bullying incident directed at her child, burst into my child's primary school classroom during lessons and proceeded to roar at all the class in a threatening manner.

She gained access to the locked school as she is a member of the board of management. :mad:

The BOM has been notified of the incident and requests for her immediate resignation have been issued by several parents.

Obviously, her actions have upset the children and their parents. They were left in shock and tears. Many did not want to return to school the next day.

The parent has not apologised for her actions.

Other than reprimanding the parent, does the school have to report the incident to the HSE, Gardai, or other groups? Do her actions warrant a garda caution? Can she be barred from the school grounds?

The parent is involved in several community groups that interact with children. I no longer feel she is fit to work with my child or anyone else's. Is it fair to ask for her removal during events on child protection grounds, even if the incident occurred outside of those activities?

Any advice would be welcome. Many thanks.

I think you should report it to the Gardai yourself. Dont rely on others to do it.
If my child was in that class I would be straight down to the Gardai. This woman works with children. She should not be let.

Allyall

Manach wrote: »

Fair play to the parent. Kids who are subjected to bullying often suffered for years before this is brought to light or acted upon. By taking a positive step to confront the bullies and then have this action reach their parents, that person is taking personal responsibly to protect their child.

It may have been a misunderstanding, or not as bad as made out.

Also, no way would I consider yelling at a class of kids under 12 be confronting a bully, or a positive step.

Mario95

I feel that there is a lot missing from this story. Obviously the parent was shocked by what happened to her child, she would hardly break into school 'ranting like a lunatic' if she wasn't sure what really happened.

The fact that the teachers did not react also tells us that your story is a bit exaggerated. I agree that she shouldn't have used her BOM privileges to get into school and that she probably should be removed from the BOM.

I also think that instead of looking for punishment and revenge you should be trying to prevent further cases of this happening. Sorting out the bullying issue and implementing an anti-bullying policy would be a good start.

Felicity1

Mario95 wrote: »

I feel that there is a lot missing from this story. Obviously the parent was shocked by what happened to her child, she would hardly break into school 'ranting like a lunatic' if she wasn't sure what really happened.

The fact that the teachers did not react also tells us that your story is a bit exaggerated. I agree that she shouldn't have used her BOM privileges to get into school and that she probably should be removed from the BOM.

I also think that instead of looking for punishment and revenge you should be trying to prevent further cases of this happening. Sorting out the bullying issue and implementing an anti-bullying policy would be a good start.

I am not looking for revenge. My only concern is child safety.

The school has acknowledged the incident, but has not addressed it, at least not informed us parents of the results yet. I am sure they will.

The mother may have every reason to be angry and frustrated. Still no excuse for losing control, IMO.

I appreciate everyone's opinion in the thread. It is difficult to be objective when its your child's welfare.

dinnyirwin

Felicity1 wrote: »

I am not looking for revenge. My only concern is child safety.

The school has acknowledged the incident, but has not addressed it, at least not informed us parents of the results yet. I am sure they will.

The mother may have every reason to be angry and frustrated. Still no excuse for losing control, IMO.

I appreciate everyone's opinion in the thread. It is difficult to be objective when its your child's welfare.

Its your duty to inform the gardai.
Protection of the other children in the school, or other children the woman has access to , from this ever happening again is very important.

gugleguy

Down the road could this woman 'make a scene in church' during these kids communion/confirmation. Deal with this womans behavior now.

Moonbeam

I think a parents meeting needs to be called with that class and the principal and it needs to be discussed.
Normally someone on the board of management would not have direct contact with kids and therefore would not be working directly with kids so may not have garda clearance as others have assumed.

eyescreamcone

gugleguy wrote: »

Down the road could this woman 'make a scene in church' during these kids communion/confirmation. Deal with this womans behavior now.

You say 'make a scene in church' as if this is worse than making a scene in the school.
What has the church situation got to do with anything??

evolving_doors

Moonbeam wrote: »

I think a parents meeting needs to be called with that class and the principal and it needs to be discussed.
Normally someone on the board of management would not have direct contact with kids and therefore would not be working directly with kids so may not have garda clearance as others have assumed.

I think the OP mentioned somewhere that the lady was in contact with children in other areas of the community. Still doesnt mean she has garda vetting though...one to follow up..if she started to berate the class (going by op account) then it's logical to assume she made threats to the kids (either implied or explicit). I think theres a line thats definitely been crossed. Unauthorised access is trespassing no !

Theres a few scuts in my area that have thrown stuff at my house, shouted at my family damaged my car etc. Despite all this, as a teacher I need to keep my distance as any threats or actions by me to a minor could finish my career. Its frustrating but I have to accept the responsibility that I am entrusted with... seems like this lady has abused this trust to her own ends in an irrational manner...

Report her alllllll the way. Don't accept a cover up or some such effort up by the school. But do ask the school what procedures they are following, as they should have some reporting policy in place and a duty to report considering all that has happened in irish schools.