Do you have genuine friends at work?

Wanderer2010

Im working my current office nearly 7 years now and it hit me the other day that I wouldnt really call any of them genuine friends. Yes, a few are nice to chat to etc but its very mundane stuff like the weather and tv etc. When I compare it to my mates outside work its not even close. These days I dont even bother chatting to anyone outside my core 2 or 3 workmates because I cant see it going anywhere, hence no invites to gatherings etc I dont know is it normal to be in a job that long and not have friends? Are your workmates just to be tolerated or genuine mates?

The Backwards Man

They are all cnuts. All of them.

n32

I worked on the same 4 man shift for 8 years . Ended up with 3 of the best friends I could hope for. Shift work is very different to office work. Working nights and having the craic is a great way to build friendship

_Kaiser_

My experience has been that you will find people you get on great with in the office and socially while you're there but very few of those friendships survive moves to other companies.

I worked in a place for 7 years as well and would be able to list 4 people I still talk to. In my current role there's probably one that I'd consider a friend outside of the office.

NUTZZ

Some of the lads at work are now my best friends!

keith16

In my work to date, I have probably only made two genuine friends.

Most other people I have met through work I have no interest in. The majority have a shocking attitude to their work, with a "can't wait for Friday" type mentality.

I hate that.

kippy

Yeah...ive a few friends in my current job that i would meet up with outside of work and a very good friend that i met in a job i was only in for a couple if years almost a decade ago.

BillyMitchel

n32 wrote: »

I worked on the same 4 man shift for 8 years . Ended up with 3 of the best friends I could hope for. Shift work is very different to office work. Working nights and having the craic is a great way to build friendship

Are you a rentboy?

maneno

Whats wrong with looking forward to a weekend?that aside,have made good friends in my work

keith16 wrote: »

In my work to date, I have probably only made two genuine friends.

Most other people I have met through work I have no interest in. The majority have a shocking attitude to their work, with a "can't wait for Friday" type mentality.

I hate that.

Irishmale0399

Have a workmate, he sat in an office with another man for over 18 months and couldnt tell me where the man lived or if he was married. Gotta love the old German mentality......work is work and private life has nothing to do with it.

I go to work every day, do what i am paid for and leave. At the end of the day, doesnt matter where you are its a rat race for the next pay rise, promotion or whatever it may be. No friends when money comes into it in my opinion.

DK man

Work with 50 people and only 1 is a friend. I'm friendly with most of the others but at home time it's by by. And if I won the lotto I'd probably never see all but 1 again unless I bumped into them on the street....

El Horseboxo

Yeah I have developed really close friends in the 2 years I've been in my current job. More like brothers at times cause our lives can often depend on each other. We'd go to basketball games together, workout, barbecues, drinks, family events and all that. I'd be really close to my partner and 3 other guys on my team. Then the others would be just like casual friends in a wider circle.

zl1whqvjs75cdy

Irishmale0399 wrote: »

Have a workmate, he sat in an office with another man for over 18 months and couldnt tell me where the man lived or if he was married. Gotta love the old German mentality......work is work and private life has nothing to do with it.

I go to work every day, do what i am paid for and leave. At the end of the day, doesnt matter where you are its a rat race for the next pay rise, promotion or whatever it may be. No friends when money comes into it in my opinion.

Jesus I'm glad I don't work with you

Yep. I have some good friends in work that I go out with (not all the time like) and can go to them for anything if I need them. We buy each other birthday presents and always have cake on birthdays and we have a Christmas party and do kris kindle

They're not my best mates now, but still good friends.

Of it wasn't for them I'd probably already have moved on by now tbh!!

whupdedo

I read that as genius friends, I was going to post their all as thick as ****, but it's moot now :-(

Ten of Swords

I'm very good friends with two people, they started at around the same time as I did so we were always grouped together.

The others, not so much. I overstepped a few boundaries with one in particular so most of my other colleagues have branded me a troublemaker. I don't care though, I don't go to work for craic, I go there to get paid and I'm good at what I do.

n32

BillyMitchel wrote: »

Are you a rentboy?

Are you a comedian?

PrettyBoy

Ten of Swords wrote: »

I overstepped a few boundaries with one in particular so most of my other colleagues have branded me a troublemaker.

What did you do?

lottpaul

Worked in the same place for over 35 years - prob with 50-60 different people - a handful were there for the same time. Hated some of them, got on Ok with most, remained friends with 2 -- and I had made those friendships within the first 2 years.
It's work - end of. We work to live, not live to work.

smcgiff

Have some good friends from my time starting out in practice, still go on lads holidays together, but haven't made real close friends at work since then.

It was probably because we were of a similar age, had similar jobs, interests and problems. That's unlikely to be repeated for the rest of my career.

Strumms

I wouldn't class any of my work colleagues as friends. I don't socialise with any of them but maybe two or three times a year some of us will all just go for 'work drinks' and it's always great craic but it's always as social as we get. It's the same right throughout the team of 8 of us. There is a broad range in ages from mid 50's down to myself in my early 30s but I'm still a lot more experienced then most of the team.

I find that despite getting on well most of the time there always seems to be a fair bit of sniping and manouvering going on and background talk to be in a situation where your have that 100% bond with someone to class them as a proper friend.

I come in and do my bit to get on with everyone and make an effort to ensure there is a good atmosphere between the team as is ones responsibility I feel but I think in my case friends is something for outside of work.

BillyMitchel

n32 wrote: »

Are you a comedian?

Sometimes but not always.

BNMC

keith16 wrote: »

In my work to date, I have probably only made two genuine friends.

Most other people I have met through work I have no interest in. The majority have a shocking attitude to their work, with a "can't wait for Friday" type mentality.

I hate that.

What? You hate people having time off to do something other than work?

The cheek of them lazy inconsiderate bastards.

Teyla Emmagan

I have two good friends in my current job (who will be lifers all going well), but most of my best friends are people I used to work with. Makes sense seeing the amount of time you spend with these people and all the shared experiences (moaning, crying, wailing, raging against the man etc).

Strumms

BNMC wrote: »

What? You hate people having time off to do something other than work?

The cheek of them lazy inconsiderate bastards.

Nothing wrong with a can't wait for Friday mentality as long as Mon-Fri you put in a shift and do your work. Personally I value my time off rather more then the time I spend in work so looking forward to that time away from work is natural and I say that as someone who for the most parts really enjoys the job I do.

pragmatic1

Not really but it's because I tend to compartmentalise my life.

Potential-Monke

I'm special in that the people i work with i have to be friendly with, especially my immediate Unit. I'm not from where i work, and home is 2 hours away, so don't get to go home that often.

But, in the 8 years i'm here, i've made some excellent friends at work, at least 3 (could nearly call them besties!), and i have great friendships with about 15, and good friends with nearly everyone else (but don't really socialize, due to different shifts mostly). Thing is, you have to get on with everyone, or the job can be very hard to do. And it's taken me a good 5 years to make some great friends outside the job, all met through clubs and i don't like socializing where i work (for obvious reasons).

I also met an extremely good friend in a previous job, about 10 years ago, and still meet up anytime i'm home.

My best friend though is someone i met in school about 16 years ago. I don't think that'll ever change.

Larianne

The Backwards Man wrote: »

They are all cnuts. All of them.

Thought you were self-employed?

Oh right, nevermind.


:pac:

Tugboats

Hate cnunts who have to make friends at work and have a social life through work. Single mothers in my experience are the worst offenders

Fox_In_Socks

I'd be friendly with most in my department at work. Maybe 2 or 3 who I would have conversations with daily. Not sure if I would be keeping in contact if I left this job, so they probably aren't real friends.

Frosty McSnowballs

Yep, I'd even let them ride my sister.

Great bunch of lads!

RayCon

No.

liliq

I thought I'd made a couple of really good friends in my last job, but had a serious personality clash with another colleague who was still there when I left.
The people I had considered to be good friends cut contact fairly quickly.
Was quite upsetting after four years, to be honest!

Galwayguy35

No.

I work in a busy warehouse where there are arguments most days so no room for friendship.

weldoninhio

No, worked in the same company for 7 and a half years. No interest in making friends there. I bring in a book for lunchtime so i can read rather than talk to anyone.

harry Bailey esq

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

Yep, I'd even let them ride my sister.

pics?

Irish Steve

Thought I had made some good friends at one place, we all worked well together in a hard and physically challenging job that was also dangerous if you got it wrong.

Discovered it was a different story when some cnuts from the Union decided that they were going to get me done over because I made them look even bigger cnuts than they already were.

Not a word of defence to be heard from one of the supposed friends.

Won't trust a union rep again, ever.

keith16

Yeah I'm great friends with loads of people at work, they are my main group of friends aside from the friends I grew up with up home. Would go out with them regularly, drinks and food in each others houses regularly, have been on a number of weekends away with them for matches, beering sessions etc too.

keith16 wrote: »

Most other people I have met through work I have no interest in. The majority have a shocking attitude to their work, with a "can't wait for Friday" type mentality.

I hate that.

That would be the majority of people, do you expect people to be all excited about a weeks work? Please, who doesn't crave the weekend when they are at work? I can't wait until Friday and its only Monday morning.

keeponhurling

Teyla Emmagan wrote: »

I have two good friends in my current job (who will be lifers all going well), but most of my best friends are people I used to work with. Makes sense seeing the amount of time you spend with these people and all the shared experiences (moaning, crying, wailing, raging against the man etc).

Are you a prison officer ?

Shenshen

I would like to think so.

I've made some good friends in places I've worked before, and kept contact with some people.

I would agree with keith16 on the "can't wait for Friday" mentality - if you don't like your work, what on earth are you doing here bringing everybody else down with your attitude?
I just can't understand the mindset of someone who will spend 40h a week somewhere they hate, and I found in the past that hanging out with them is not good for your own state of mind.

Yes, a couple I'd consider close friends. They're both much older than me and at a different stage in their personal lives but they're the kind of people I could turn to in a disaster and for life advice, and I look up to them both in many ways. There are different kinds of friendships.

Gyalist

I'm an employer and while I'm friendly with everyone, I'm not "friends" with anyone I work with as it helps to keep a professional distance. That said, one of my closest friends is a former employee.

c68zapdsm5i1ru

I've accumulated a few good friends during my years at work. I've also got some old work friends I meet up with occasionally but don't see regularly. And I've lost touch with some people who were good friends for a while but we drifted apart eventually. In my current workplace, where I've been for three years, I have a couple of friends that I socialise with occasionally.

kowloon

DK man wrote: »

Work with 50 people and only 1 is a friend. I'm friendly with most of the others but at home time it's by by. And if I won the lotto I'd probably never see all but 1 again unless I bumped into them on the street....

More than one of them would be best mates if you won the lotto.

smcgiff

kowloon wrote: »

More than one of them would be best mates if you won the lotto.

Is that the new slogan from the National Lottery?

Lia_lia

I have just started a new job in the last few months, so no. But I can see myself being good friends with lots of them, really nice people!

In my old job (was in it for 5 years) I made some really good friends. Met one of my best friends there, we started at the same time.

vitani

Not really. I get on well with nearly everyone I work with, and I like the vast majority of them, but we're not the type of office to go out socialising together or anything. It suits me, though. I've worked in places before where the friendships took over and there was constant drama between various cliques.

TouchingVirus

When I joined Boards in 2011 there was a massive hiring drive going on in Distilled Media at the time. I made some fantastic friends while there, there was quite the contingent of us nerds who hung out together and went to the cinema/friday drinks and talked about all sorts of stuff. I live with 3 of the lads I met working there and I count most of them as close friends still. This past Friday my former team lead moved on and one of the group is going to London - we all ended up in our house drinking & hanging out until the wee hours just like old times - it was awesome.

In my previous jobs I never had that, and I don't in my current job either - everybody in the current place (all 3 others) are older & married

Red Pepper

It definitely depends on the employer or company culture.

I have great friends from some employers and zero friends from others.

LizT

Yep, have genuine friends in work. My situation's a bit different though because we all left home to work here (we didn't know each other before that), we all started work at the same time and we all live in the same apartment block :P Would have moved back to Ireland by now if I didn't get on with them tbh.

arybvtcw0eolkf

I'm not sure about 'genuine friends' but I have work mates who I know would lay down their lives for me, and I for them ~ no question about it.