Something is buzzing in my attic

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:38am #1

There's a fecking wasp or bee or something buzzing away in my attic, keeping me away from my beauty sleep.

Seriously, I thought animals were supposed to be smart and know what time of the year it is, why would it think this is springtime when it's -2 and there's ice on the ground?

Any tips on how to get it to buzz off?

Mint Aero · 09-01-2014 1:40am

Burn your house down.

dd972 · 09-01-2014 1:43am

Alert! Heat Lamps and strange looking plants at OP's address, PM him for details

The_Mask · 09-01-2014 1:43am

The batteries will run out go back to sleep....

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:43am

Mint Aero wrote: »

Burn your house down.

Yeah, that will help me sleep. . .

WoollyRedHat · 09-01-2014 1:44am

The Backwards Man wrote: »

There's a fecking wasp or bee or something buzzing away in my attic, keeping me away from my beauty sleep.

Seriously, I thought animals were supposed to be smart and know what time of the year it is, why would it think this is springtime when it's -2 and there's ice on the ground?

Any tips on how to get it to buzz off?

Awaken the thing that lives in your attic, then the wasp/bee will be the least of your worries.

catallus · 09-01-2014 1:45am

OP are you afraid it is going to fly down from the attic with all its wasp or bee friends and fly into your nose or ears while you sleep?

wretcheddomain · 09-01-2014 1:45am

Go to bed OP, you're drunk.

Missyelliot2 · 09-01-2014 1:45am

....would it be bats?

Mint Aero · 09-01-2014 1:49am

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Yeah, that will help me sleep. . .

Count the dots ..... . . . ... . . . ..... ... . .... . . .

Still awake?

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:49am

Missyelliot2 wrote: »

....would it be bats?

It seems crazy alright. I can't pin it down at all, it's moving all around the roofspace, above me, to the left, to the right, all over the place.

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:50am

Mint Aero wrote: »

Count the dots ..... . . . ... . . . ..... ... . .... . . .

Still awake?

30

Yep.

suicide_circus · 09-01-2014 1:51am

Did you leave your sybian on up there?

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:52am

suicide_circus wrote: »

Did you leave your sybian on up there?

Na. I'm straight.

unitedrover · 09-01-2014 1:53am

Its the rat from next door

biko · 09-01-2014 1:53am

Paranormal Activity 5

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:55am

biko wrote: »

Paranormal Activity 5

I'll stick my webcam on, if I'm not posting here tomorrow, someone come looking for me.

suicide_circus · 09-01-2014 1:56am

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Na. I'm straight.

Ah The Backdoor Man,
You can indulge in the ecstasy of prostate stimulation and still be straight, you know.

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 1:58am

unitedrover wrote: »

Its the rat from next door

Nearest house is a mile away. It would want to be a big rat.

Missyelliot2 · 09-01-2014 1:59am

Starlings can get into tiny spaces too...they are very annoying!

Sir Arthur Daley · 09-01-2014 2:03am

Something is buzzing in my attic Head

FYP :rolleyes:

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 2:04am

Missyelliot2 wrote: »

Starlings can get into tiny spaces too...they are very annoying!

Starlings don't normally buzz though. Anyway, there's a hawk in the forest next to me takes care of them.

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 2:07am

It's stopped now, everything has gone eerily quiet. Nothing but deathly silence all around.

catallus · 09-01-2014 2:10am

They're just regrouping, OP. Beware.

Gremlinertia · 09-01-2014 2:10am

Totally tinfoil hot o' clock.

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 2:13am

catallus wrote: »

They're just regrouping, OP. Beware.

You're right. Started again. Seems to be two of them, one either side of the house.

catallus · 09-01-2014 2:15am

The Backwards Man wrote: »

You're right. Started again. Seems to be two of them, one either side of the house.

Seriously that sounds ominous.

Gremlinertia · 09-01-2014 2:18am

catallus wrote: »

Seriously that sounds ominous.

Somebody watered the gremlins.... :eek:

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 2:19am

catallus wrote: »

Seriously that sounds ominous.

Right, I'm off to investigate.

catallus · 09-01-2014 2:20am

HAHAHA! You're joking!

Daqster · 09-01-2014 2:20am

Maybe the A-Team are up there.

catallus · 09-01-2014 2:21am

I'll look forward to reading about your horrific demise over my brunch tomorrow, I'm off to sleep

FizzleSticks · 09-01-2014 2:22am

This post has been deleted.

Richard tea · 09-01-2014 2:26am

Its an electrical fault.
It will cause a house fire.
You will burn & die tonight.
Goodnight.

09-01-2014 3:09am

50 minutes since last post. I'm starting to worry.

househero · 09-01-2014 3:09am

Daqster wrote: »

Maybe the A-Team are up there.

Mr.T is busy welding a helicopter from a couple bits of copper pipe and a bottle of milk.

Gremlinertia · 09-01-2014 3:11am

I'm getting ready to send the batsignal now...

Sir Arthur Daley · 09-01-2014 3:12am

househero wrote: »

Mr.T is busy welding a helicopter from a couple bits of copper pipe and a bottle of milk.

He would give MacGyver a run for his money

Gremlinertia · 09-01-2014 3:29am

Time to run around waving arms in useless panic eh?.

Sir Arthur Daley · 09-01-2014 3:35am

Its game over, ball burst

catallus · 09-01-2014 8:06am

The Backwards Man, killed by a bee in the attic?

I always thought it would be auto-erotic asphyxiation myself. Mmmm.

Mr.Crinklewood · 09-01-2014 8:06am

It's auditions for Britains got talent.

Sir Arthur Daley · 09-01-2014 8:11am

Mr.Crinklewood wrote: »

It's auditions for Britains got talent.

Ant and Dec, Backwards mans new friends.

YellowFeather · 09-01-2014 8:27am

Just make sure it's not just you clicking your fingers. Fell for that one before.

09-01-2014 8:34am

Yeah and make sure it is not the contents of some kind of previously un-noticed safe.

Ghost Buster · 09-01-2014 9:05am

The Backwards Man wrote: »

There's a fecking wasp or bee or something buzzing away in my attic, keeping me away from my beauty sleep.

Seriously, I thought animals were supposed to be smart and know what time of the year it is, why would it think this is springtime when it's -2 and there's ice on the ground?

Any tips on how to get it to buzz off?

Open attic hatch. Empty aerosol of bug spray into attic. Close hatch.
:rolleyes:
Disclaimer. Not effective against tinnitus

Plazaman · 09-01-2014 9:21am

One buzzing then turns to two? In the attic you say?

Definitely an electrical fault. Too late now, house is probably burnt to the ground, hope he got out.

danniemcq · 09-01-2014 9:25am

Ghost Buster wrote: »

Open attic hatch. Empty aerosol of bug spray into attic. Close hatch.
:rolleyes:
Disclaimer. Not effective against tinnitus

you need an elastic band too.

wrap the elastic around the can top and bottom so it'll press down the spray activation button thingy then throw it into the attic.

Makes the whole process much cooler looking

holystungun9 · 09-01-2014 10:44am

It's either Anto, Deco or Johno. Or any combination of the three.

The Backwards Man · 09-01-2014 11:18am

So, found out what must have happened. Went up in to the attic and found two bumblebees buzzing round the place. Had a hell of a job getting them out, it's not easy trying to shoo insects down a trapdoor, in the dark, with nothing but plasterboard underfoot. Eventually got them down about 4am, then another hour to get them downstairs and out the door. Poor buggers probably died of frostbite outside after all that.

They must have got into the house with the turf, then snuggled in the Christmas tree and so ended up in the attic.

FudgeBrownie · 09-01-2014 10:13pm

Vibrator batteries shouldn't last too long.

Something is buzzing in my attic

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