Skipping/Jumping/Cutting Queues in Public

userofbuses

Hi folks,

I would really appreciate some advice.

Apologies if this is the wrong place to post this. I will happily move my question to somewhere more suitable if needs be.

My questions are:
When should you challenge (verbally) a line cutter/queue jumper?
What are the best phrases to use when doing this?
(I am not good at spur of the moment situations as I have one of those reflective personalities - so I would like to have a few choice words at my disposal)
-should you say - "I am queuing too" or should you ask a question so as to make the person have to justify their action "I'm queuing too, is there some reason why you need to skip the queue?" but in a non-sarcastic tone.

-lastly - if the person goes completely crazy (see story below), what is the best thing to do? Most articles on the internet recommend doing nothing and just walking away but that seems like giving into a bully. I don't want to be rude back to someone as that makes me as bad as them. Are there good phrases that could be used for taking the moral high-ground or at least standing up for one's self?

I was on the 145 bus the other day and the traffic was a nightmare because of the Michelle Obama visit (which is a totally separate issue that I don't want to address). So it was a slow moving bus, people a bit impatient, a huge gang of foreign students had just gotten on the bus resulting in further delays with correct change, etc.

My stop was coming up next so I started to make my way, without skipping anyone, up the aisle towards the door. Two people were in front of me so I stood behind. I was standing just where there is a platform for people to put bags. I was day dreaming for a minute or two when I felt someone push into me from behind. It was a woman.
She said, "I want to get to the front"
I said, "Sorry I am getting off at the next stop too"
She said "F**K you" and pushed past me, skipped the next two people and stood in that area where you aren't supposed to stand beside the driver.
then she said "F**K YOU. When someone asks you to move, YOU MOVE"

I started to smile and laugh at her and made sure to make eye contact with her. She was in her late forties. Not terribly well-dressed but clearly not one of those junkie types who hang around the city.

Then I said "I hope you have a nice day"
This got her more riled up. "F**K YOU AND YOUR STUPID FACE"

I was quite surprised at this stage and lost for words. I didn't want to say something mean and nasty as I would be just as bad as her but I should have said something to stand up to her.

Then she sort of lost interest in me and tried to convince the driver to drop her off before the bus stop. He didn't. Instead she started talking to him to give out about the Obamas and for some reason, Alan Shatter's house. Judging from her vocabulary she was reasonably well educated but clearly a very very angry and troubled person.

Celly Smunt

userofbuses wrote: »

This got her more riled up. "F**K YOU AND YOUR STUPID FACE"

She wins,she called your face stupid.That finishes any argument ever.

lkionm

Self entitled 40 year women.


My favorite.

IM0

"theres a queue, *point behind you* " and make it sound like you are assertive not a walk over

they will get the message or not, its all in the delivery, need to get in touch with your alpha male side

Chucken

Ah, the 145..can be a nightmare (probably )I'm glad I live in the country. We have no buses

kneemos

It's hardly queue jumping to get off the bus,why would you give a shoite?

The Backwards Man

Chucken wrote: »

Ah, the 145..can be a nightmare (probably )I'm glad I live in the country. We have no buses

It can be a balls if the neighbour is moving his cows on the road when you're running late for the bingo though.

userofbuses

pmcmahon wrote: »

She wins,she called your face stupid.That finishes any argument ever.

Yeah I should have just laughed at her at that stage but I genuinely shocked at what she said. I was really concentrating hard not to lose it. As I said, I am not good in verbal confrontations - I would need to have a few disarming phrases worked out.

I was looking around the internet about this and found this clip where journalists paid actors to be really obnoxious in public to see if people would complain.
http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=1972585n

WinnyThePoo

I've had a nun skip me in a queue .. I was left speechless..the bitch

Chucken

The Backwards Man wrote: »

It can be a balls if the neighbour is moving his cows on the road when you're running late for the bingo though.

Oh I forgot about the bingo bus!
Sure the driver would know what time the farmer would be moving the cows...sure why wouldn't he know an important thing like that?

keith16

Some people really are idiots tho, the DART is the worst. People always crowd the area near the doors and it can be impossible to get on sometimes. You just need to ask people to move back, and generally they do.

I squeezed on one morning after such a request. The woman standing nearest the door was clearly but out by the fact that I had boarded.

She goes "there should be another train in a minute"

I replied "excellent, why don't you get off and wait for it?"

To which she had no reply. God I hate people on the DART.

Odysseus

Well if you have a stupid face what else can you expect? Stupid face that is a classic one.

I don't know what you mean by "she was not one of those junkie types"? What was that about?

However, I find a strong excuse me, there is a que; generally works, but if the mouth off just tell them to fcuk off.

stoneill

If someone butts in in front of you, you can say something along the lines of "I don't mind you jumping ahead of me but did you ask all those people behind?"

userofbuses

I lived in the UK for six years and I noticed that queuing is much more respected there and that people were much quicker to call people out for littering, making noise in the cinema, skipping queues, etc and that it wouldn't be just one person complaining

userofbuses

Sorry the reference to the junkies may have been a bit degrading - I was just saying that when it comes to those heroin addicts who hang around on the quays, I give them a bye in terms of basic manners and let them be. They have very unfortunate lives and probably were never taught basic social skills by their parents, if they had any parents when they were growing up, or have forgotten them. No, my new friend on the bus was clearly not one of them

Guy:Incognito

People seem to be fine with others cutting queues when in cars for some reason.even to the point of leaving a gap and letting them in. Yet if the same person walked up to the queue in a post office and skipped theyd be whinging.

userofbuses

It's weird, I have only started driving in Ireland in the last two years having learnt elsewhere but drivers are generally really decent. Much to my surprise, I found other drivers are very seldom aggressive - there is a fair bit of rule-bending and rule-not-knowing but in general everyone is well behaved.

The behavious of Public transport users towards one another is a far far worse than how drivers behave towards each other. Passengers on buses seem to be the worst, maybe because of the confined space, LUAS and Darts are generally ok.

userofbuses

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

People seem to be fine with others cutting queues when in cars for some reason.even to the point of leaving a gap and letting them in. Yet if the same person walked up to the queue in a post office and skipped theyd be whinging.

I agree, it is very weird.

Herb Powell

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjzKKY3GO0k

Paramite Pie

Sounds like you handled it perfectly. Being nice to assholes only pisses them off even more.:D

If you stoop to their level, they'll only use that as justification for their behaviour. They'll convince themselves that they are the victim of the rude person. They are very arrogant/self-centred like that.

Now if your queueing for a service like an atm, or shop queue I would tell them not to skip me and skip them back. Unless they look like they could stab me or something....

AgileMyth

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

People seem to be fine with others cutting queues when in cars for some reason.even to the point of leaving a gap and letting them in. Yet if the same person walked up to the queue in a post office and skipped theyd be whinging.

You'd be surprised at the amount of people who go out of their way to stop motorcyclists from 'skipping' them. Often endangering the motorcyclists life in the process. Not sure what they they achieve by halting my progression or why I should sit in a queue for the sake of it.

Odysseus

AgileMyth wrote: »

You'd be surprised at the amount of people who go out of their way to stop motorcyclists from 'skipping' them. Often endangering the motorcyclists life in the process. Not sure what they they achieve by halting my progression or why I should sit in a queue for the sake of it.

I often wonder what that is about, I also find that those types generally sh!t themselves if you confront them about it, often coming out with apologies and I didn't even know you where there bollocks.

kneemos

AgileMyth wrote: »

You'd be surprised at the amount of people who go out of their way to stop motorcyclists from 'skipping' them. Often endangering the motorcyclists life in the process. Not sure what they they achieve by halting my progression or why I should sit in a queue for the sake of it.

Car drivers don't think about bikes also bikers are paranoid.

starWave

I don't think it was a queue if you were just getting off the bus. She was just being an asshole.

Skipping queues really pisses me off, and people should be called out more for it. What's even worse is when you have a choice of a few queues, and you end up in the slow one.

On the other hand, if it's a badly formed a queue, like a crowd going through a door or something, or those crowds people form at the gates in airports, then I have no problem pushing in at the side. There's usually an advantageous spot and a disadvantageous spot to pick in such a 'crowd', and people who don't take the most advantageous spot, well thats their own fault.

Hownowcow

kneemos wrote: »

Car drivers don't think about bikes also bikers are paranoid.

I think bikers may need to be a bit paranoid about car drivers in order to stay alive.

Odysseus

kneemos wrote: »

Car drivers don't think about bikes also bikers are paranoid.

I think I can assess my own paranoia;)

However, seriously there is a point in viewing all cars as being out to get you; as you said a lot of drivers don't think about bikes. The amount of times I have got the I didn't see you, I have lights on in daylight and I'm quite visible.


We all make mistakes, it is when someone puts out to block you from filtering on purpose that I have issue with. As I said we all make mistakes, but deliberately trying to stop a person fro making progress, just because you are stuck in traffic is totally different.

kneemos

Odysseus wrote: »

I think I can assess my own paranoia;)

However, seriously there is a point in viewing all cars as being out to get you; as you said a lot of drivers don't think about bikes. The amount of times I have got the I didn't see you, I have lights on in daylight and I'm quite visible.


We all make mistakes, it is when someone puts out to block you from filtering on purpose that I have issue with. As I said we all make mistakes, but deliberately trying to stop a person fro making progress, just because you are stuck in traffic is totally different.

Seriously nobody gives bikes a second thought,even if they do see them.

Pumpkinseeds

I just don't put up with anyone trying to skip a queue anymore. The ones that annoy me most are the ones who come into a gp's busy waiting room and ask if anyone minds if they just run in quickly cause they just want a prescription/cert/(insert lie of choice here). My answer is yes I do mind. I don't care what they're at the doctor for, they can wait there bloody turn like the rest of us.

That being said if somebody who looks to be in a lot of pain or someone with a very stressed out child comes in after me I would offer to let them go ahead. It's usually the elderly who try to skip ahead in shops, to that I just nudge my way back in front and say I don't frigging think so dear, you look old enough to know better.

Odysseus

kneemos wrote: »

Seriously nobody gives bikes a second thought,even if they do see them.

Yep that is what we are all saying

No Pants

userofbuses wrote: »

I felt someone push into me from behind.

This is where you take action next time.

Bluegrass1

userofbuses wrote: »

Hi folks,


This got her more riled up. "F**K YOU AND YOUR STUPID FACE"

.

You should say, "if I had a face like yours i'd teach my arse how to talk".