If you could redesign the human body

Burlap_Sack

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

I agree. But where would you put it?

*horror visions of **** vomitting out your mouth* :eek:

Maybe the belly button could be put to better use! :pac:

Index finger could double as a willy. Not sure where the sack would go though.

Cungi

DeVore wrote: »

The human body is incredibly badly designed. I have to laugh at the "Intelligent Design" crowd, cos if this is the pinnacle of "God's" ability... he's crap at design.

I mean, who puts the "waste disposal" system beside the "playground".

Some people like to play with the "waste disposal system"

Personally i think two cocks would be handy. As in one for each hand :pac:

Dr.MickKiller

Burlap_Sack wrote: »

Index finger could double as a willy. Not sure where the sack would go though.

Oops, I'm just after ejaculating on your sandwich there, let me wipe that you.

TheLastMohican

Men - corkscrew dicks

Women - corkscrew chachas

Both screws either left hand or right hand

Burlap_Sack

Dr.MickKiller wrote: »

Oops, I'm just after ejaculating on your sandwich there, let me wipe that you.

Win Win

666irishguy

Night-vision capable eyes that can see in other spectrum's, Lungs that can also breathe something other than Oxygen, Gills, Photosynthesis capable skin and extra cells that are stem type cells that can regenerate body parts. I'd also put in the ability to accept tissue from any other human.

TheLastMohican

666irishguy wrote: »

Night-vision capable eyes that can see in other spectrum's, Lungs that can also breathe something other than Oxygen, Gills, Photosynthesis capable skin and extra cells that are stem type cells that can regenerate body parts. I'd also put in the ability to accept tissue from any other human.

Surely the second last makes the last superfluous?

rolliepoley

There is only one thing i'd like to have, and that is gills, everything else is ok .

Remember this fella.

who_me

More powerful internals, so we can insta-pee and insta-poo. Takes too long as it is and cuts into drinking time. Just walk into the WC, boom, walk out. Oh, and it could smell nicer, and taste of strawberries. Not that I'd try it.

Bigger capacity too. Always hate the moment the seal goes on a night out, and you know you'll be back and forth every few minutes after that. Not quite sure where we'd put it, but it'd be nice to be able to store a night-full before having to go.

Plus, detachable genitalia. For the times you actually want to get stuff done without being obsessed with the nearest woman. This upgrade might be incompatible with the two previously mentioned.

Daveysil15

I'd design a different way to get rid of waste. Piss and poo are horrid. Life would be so much easier if you never had to use a toilet.

Fruit flavoured semen for the ladies too, so they'd be more inclined to give head.

Wattle

Why does hair grow in your ears as you get older? I'd change that. It's unsightly and weird.

snubbleste

I wouldn't put the recreation area next to the waste facility

Mariasofia

Id get rid of hiccups, like wtf are they about?

--Kaiser--

I'm pretty happy with the way my body functions but I could definitely use a less ugly face

SouthTippBass

I think everyone would benifit from having a stronger back, its usually the first thing to go. That and teeth.

Cody Pomeray

eyes painted on your eyelids, so you always look awake.

theidiots

Women should not be as moody, Women should not bitch and moan, Should be born without a tongue

mod: banned.

fergiesfolly

Eyebrows that grow to a certain length...and then stop.
Not like mine that seem to enjoy creeping up my forehead.
And a self cleaning arse. Like an oven.....but with less heat!

The Backwards Man

Some people should be born without typing fingers.

Stop eye lashes falling into eye.

jaffacakesyum

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Some people should be born without typing fingers.

Exhibit A: the idiots

theidiots wrote: »

Women should not be as moody, Women should not bitch and moan, Should be born without a tongue

1ZRed

-Age up to 30 then no more until you die at 80 or something. (What would you been doing for that long anyway so fair enough)

-No more male pattern baldness. That shit is useless!

-Teeth that don't wear out or replace themselves when needed.

-When you take a dump it comes out as small pellets and is sterile thereafter.

-Staying fit to be far, far easier and being able to keep muscle mass easier.

-Instead of being fertile all the time, to choose when you want to become fertile.

-Eye sight and hearing to be as good as they can and never deteriorate with age.

-Orgasms to last longer and more intense for both men as women and have them equal in length.

-Anal sex to be as easy and naturally as clean as vaginal sex with no lube needed and no pain. No excuses not to then!

stop animal cruelty

Give men a pair of ovaries too! Then they might understand the mood swings

jaffacakesyum

1ZRed wrote: »

-Anal sex to be as easy and clean as vaginal sex with no lube needed and no pain. No excuses not to then!

Normally I wouldn't ask a gay poster on boards this, but as it is AH, and from your posts you seem like a easy going bloke......... would you change the male body so that they had both a vagina and a penis? The guy would look and act like a guy in every other way but would just have a more vagina-ish hole which would be, as you said, cleaner and easier :pac:

Or am I basically asking you if you want to shag a hermaphodite? :P

Oh the human body...so fascinating..

OU812

Put another pair of fun bags on the back. Be handy for when you're cuddling or slow dancing.

theidiots

OU812 wrote: »

Put another pair of fun bags on the back. Be handy for when you're cuddling or slow dancing.

or doing her from behind

1ZRed

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

Normally I wouldn't ask a gay poster on boards this, but as it is AH, and from your posts you seem like a easy going bloke......... would you change the male body so that they had both a vagina and a penis? The guy would look and act like a guy in every other way but would just have a more vagina-ish hole which would be, as you said, cleaner and easier :pac:

Or am I basically asking you if you want to shag a hermaphodite? :P

Oh the human body...so fascinating..

Basically yeah you are asking just that tbh

But no I wouldn't like that, I have no problems with a girl having a vagina as it suits them but give a guy one and I'd be fairly turned off.. not that it's a pussy cos that doesn't turn me off, only on a guy it would.

Just leave his hole aesthetically the same and give it a lot of the same qualities as a vagina, self lubricating, more sensitive, make the prostate even more sensitive (in my case have it actually do something :rolleyes:), completely sterile, still keep a lot of the tightness and we're sorted.


Without a doubt this is the strangest conversation I've ever had

FrostyJack

Acid for blood and harder skin, no animals/aliens would dare attack then!!

Wibbs

stop animal cruelty wrote: »

Give men a pair of ovaries too! Then they might understand the mood swings

We have em, only they're on the outside swinging in the breeze. Yep we need to get onto the design dept on that one. Women's ovaries have a monthly cycle where they fire out one, maybe two reproductive cells in that time, men have a daily cycle with up and down levels of testosterone and we produce hundreds of reproductive cells per second. *gauntlet thrown*

jaffacakesyum

Wibbs wrote: »

We have em, only they're on the outside swinging in the breeze. Yep we need to get onto the design dept on that one. Women's ovaries have a monthly cycle where they fire out one, maybe two reproductive cells in that time, men have a daily cycle with up and down levels of testosterone and we produce hundreds of reproductive cells per second. *gauntlet thrown*

Plus, 1 sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it. A normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1587GB in about 3 seconds.

ALL HAIL THE SPERM