DILEMMA: gay in the changing room

Cody Pomeray

First world problem alert.

Male and female changing rooms exist so that nobody feels they are being seen naked in a sexual way by strangers.

Personally it doesn't bother me very much.

But I reckon a lot of guys would feel uncomfortable getting naked around guys who they think might be checking them out (body, physique, manhood). Ditto with lesbians.

As a gay myself, it makes me a little paranoid. I know a lot of people in my gym and I've never hidden the fact I'm gay. We probably 'notice' other guys bodies in a way a straight guy might not, but i don't want anyone to think I'm checking them out and even though I feel silly about overthinking it, I avoid going back to change with guys I am friends with

What do other AHers think? With openly gay people on the loose in a gym or swimming pool near you, do changing rooms need a re-think?

MurdyWurdy

If a lesbian was checking me out in a changing room I'd be flattered, tbh. It's not something that ever crosses my mind though.

Links234

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

What do other AHers think? With openly gay people on the loose in a gym or swimming pool near you, do changing rooms need a re-think?

If anyone has a problem with sharing space in a gym or swimming pool with gay people, their attitude needs a re-think. End of story!

Andy-Pandy

As long as you're not overly checking people out or perving there is no problem.

Gorilla Rising

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

With openly gay people on the loose in a gym or swimming pool near you

Lock them up!!

sea_monkey

it wouldnt feel uncomfortable, i bring my lube everywhere

Chancer3001

Time for people to grow up!

Jarrod

I think it should just be one changing room for everyone. There's no reason to separate genders in changing rooms.

Cody Pomeray

Links234 wrote: »

If anyone has a problem with sharing space in a gym or swimming pool with gay people, their attitude needs a re-think. End of story!

I used to think that too. But then I wouldn't blame a woman, for example, for feeling uncomfortable changing around men.

So I can see why a straight guy would feel the same around gay guys.

Paddy Cow

It's never even occured to me to be honest. A discrete look is fine. Groping or taking pictures would be a no no.

Ranicand

Ok straight men together as they are only interested in women.

But if you create a gay changing run you still have a problem just cause you gay it does not mean you want some strange old git checking you out.

Keep things as they are men with the men women with the women.

If your shy use a towel problem solved.

ahnowbrowncow

It wouldn't bother me but I can understand why it might bother some people, it's not much different than a straight man in a female changing room.

The Backwards Man

I'd hope they would approach me, because if I ever find myself in a gym or a swimming pool I'm obviously lost.

WayneMolloy

Cue everyone chiming in that they wouldnt have a problem with it, people need to grow up etc.

When in reality a majority of people would be freaked the f*ck out by it.

Diabhal Beag

If you're insecure the gym dressing rooms are not the place for you.

Praetorian Saighdiuir

I am friends with a gay guy. It never bothers me in the changing rooms after the gym.

I don't get weirded out or paranoid about it and he doesn't make me feel uncomfortable about it.

TeddyTedson

I'd be flattered.
I think that's why old fat men walk around so openly naked in the gym. They miss the days of being checked out and they desperately parade around the changing rooms in hope that some gay guy will flatter them...Yeah, that must be it.

Seriously though, the only people who would have a problem with this I imagine are people who are not comfortable in their own sexuality.

Nodin

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

What do other AHers think? With openly gay people on the loose...........

No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NoNoNoNoNoNo!!!!!!!!!!!!

My name is URL

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

As a gay myself, it makes me a little paranoid.

You're doing wonders for the organisation

mikom

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgI5Rx41Sbw

TeddyTedson

Nodin wrote: »

No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NoNoNoNoNoNo!!!!!!!!!!!!

They've escaped :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:
Has anyone contacted the authorities? :P

WayneMolloy

Diabhal Beag wrote: »

If you're insecure the gym dressing rooms are not the place for you.

Its nothing to do with feeling insecure.

Anyway, anytime I went swimming in central Europe, they had an open plan unisex changing room with loads of small changing cubicles. This is ideal, everyone has their privacy, kids can go in with their parents and what not.

Cody Pomeray

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Seriously though, the only people who would have a problem with this I imagine are people who are not comfortable in their own sexuality.

You're probably being a little tongue in cheek here, but I don't think women who don't want to share changing rooms with men are uncomfortable with their sexuality. I think they'd just feel weirded out and uncomfortable, and that's OK.

I think we expect straight guys to man up and get over it, when in fairness it's just as legitimate if they personally feel a bit uncomfortable with the idea.

locohobo

Links234 wrote: »

If anyone has a problem with sharing space in a gym or swimming pool with gay people, their attitude needs a re-think. End of story!

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
What he said!!!!!:cool:

Nodin

TeddyTedson wrote: »

They've escaped :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:
Has anyone contacted the authorities? :P

I was going to but that would require risking public scrutiny from a gay. Or worse, one of them could be....one of them.

Cody Pomeray

My name is URL wrote: »

You're doing wonders for the organisation

Nodin wrote: »

I was going to but that would require risking public scrutiny from a gay. Or worse, one of them could be....one of them.

Guys I was being facetious.

It's always a bit weird to raise your sexuality, so you'll find a lot of us try to make light of it when we do.

Seachmall

In fairness guys are constantly checking eachother out.

"Oohh, who has the biggest penis I wonder...!!"



Me. I do. Deal with it.

Links234

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

So I can see why a straight guy would feel the same around gay guys.

That's the silliest thing I've read on after hours in a while... so what if they might feel uncomfortable? what if some white guy might feel uncomfortable sharing space with a black guy in a changing room? is that to be considered? honestly, communal changing rooms are not a place I'd ever like to be, I'm uncomfortable there so I don't go there. it's really that simple.

this thing about "oh my god, someone who's gay might be having a shower next to me!" is nothing but fevered paranoia and homophobia.

can you actually demonstrate that gay people in gyms/swimming pools causes a significant problem?

Teyla Emmagan

WayneMolloy wrote: »

Cue everyone chiming in that they wouldnt have a problem with it, people need to grow up etc.

When in reality a majority of people would be freaked the f*ck out by it.

I'd be thrilled. It's unlikely to happen though, realistically. And not just because of my gym's no gay people policy.

TeddyTedson

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

You're probably being a little tongue in cheek here, but I don't think women who don't want to share changing rooms with men are uncomfortable with their sexuality. I think they'd just feel weirded out and uncomfortable, and that's OK.

I think we expect straight guys to man up and get over it, when in fairness it's just as legitimate if they personally feel a bit uncomfortable with the idea.

Oh no I mean with the gays in their own genders changing room.
Women and Men should be kept separate.

HondaSami

Must be gay night in AH's.

cheesefiend

It really depends on the person. For example I'm in the changing room nekkid and a girl is full on leering at me then yes, I'm going to be creeped out and that doesn't mean I need an attitude adjustment. If I'm in the changing room with a lesbian and they are having a goo around like any other person then no I couldn't care less. If you're just minding your own business OP no rational person is going to give a fiddlers.

Nodin

Teyla Emmagan wrote: »

I'd be thrilled. It's unlikely to happen though, realistically. And not just because of my gym's no gay people policy.

The invention of the Gay detector really has been a boon to the comfortable changing room experience.

Nodin

HondaSami wrote: »

Must be gay night in AH's.

Haven't you heard? They're on the loose.

Prodigious

Problem is, if you put all the gay lads in their own changing room, they'd still be checking each other out?
Solution is to put gay lads in the girls changing rooms, and vice versa.

Cody Pomeray

Links234 wrote: »

That's the silliest thing I've read on after hours in a while... so what if they might feel uncomfortable?

Wow, chill out.

I just said that if someone's uncomfortable, that naturally makes the person causing the discomfort uncomfortable too.

Do you think it's silly if a woman would feel uncomfortable getting changed in a men's room?

can you actually demonstrate that gay people in gyms/swimming pools causes a significant problem?

I'm not claiming this is a significant problem, I have no idea if other people think about this. That's why I started the thread. And I did put in a first world problem disclaimer.

Stark

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

Male and female changing rooms exist so that nobody feels they are being seen naked in a sexual way by strangers.

Society rules on who can be seen naked by whom are pretty much arbitrary tbh.

Uriel.

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

First world problem alert.

Male and female changing rooms exist so that nobody feels they are being seen naked in a sexual way by strangers.

Personally it doesn't bother me very much.

But I reckon a lot of guys would feel uncomfortable getting naked around guys who they think might be checking them out (body, physique, manhood). Ditto with lesbians.

As a gay myself, it makes me a little paranoid. I know a lot of people in my gym and I've never hidden the fact I'm gay. We probably 'notice' other guys bodies in a way a straight guy might not, but i don't want anyone to think I'm checking them out and even though I feel silly about overthinking it, I avoid going back to change with guys I am friends with

What do other AHers think? With openly gay people on the loose in a gym or swimming pool near you, do changing rooms need a re-think?

Taking a the entire post but leaving out the four words in bold would have changed this thread and its responses in a very wild way

Teyla Emmagan

Nodin wrote: »

The invention of the Gay detector really has been a boon to the comfortable changing room experience.

Not in my case, anyone perving at me would be good.

Seachmall

Teyla Emmagan wrote: »

Not in my case, anyone perving at me would be good.

If you're looking for someone to perv on you I'm free Sundays.

Turtyturd

Nodin wrote: »

Haven't you heard? They're on the loose.

Keep calm...you can spot them by the way they drop phrases like 'First World Problems' into conversations.

Links234

locohobo wrote: »

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
What he said!!!!!:cool:

I'd correct you and say it's "what she said" but I don't wanna get into a whole he said/she said thing

Teyla Emmagan

Seachmall wrote: »

If you're looking for someone to perv on you I'm free Sundays.

That's so kind!!

MadsL

The UK and Ireland cannot deal with the idea of being naked in mixed or single sex saunas yet, never mind single sex changing rooms. Heads would melt.

GRMA

People should be stopped from getting changed at all, do it at home.

Swim in your work clothes

pragmatic1

WayneMolloy wrote: »

Cue everyone chiming in that they wouldnt have a problem with it, people need to grow up etc.

When in reality a majority of people would be freaked the f*ck out by it.

Why? Unless you're exceptionally sexy, I don't think they're going to be staring at your bits. Are you attracted to every single woman you lay eyes on?

MadsL

The OP has posted a minor issue. Quick - question everything about them, suggest they must be obsessive, have no sex life, remind them of the third world and personally insult them. Three of you start bickering on the definition of a changing room. One other person make a knob joke.

Done all that? Grand, job done AH.

/thread

locohobo

Links234 wrote: »

I'd correct you and say it's "what she said" but I don't wanna get into a whole he said/she said thing

.....Yea! Sorry hon ...Just saw that now...;)

oldyouth

I think every user of a changing room is well aware that there will often be gay people present. I mean, the odds are that it will happen. I think if everyone exercises a reasonable degree of modesty in the changing room, then there is not a problem for either party

In my experience, it is often the (seemingly) heterosexual who flashes his bollicks in your face while trying to engage you in conversation about 'de match'

HondaSami

Jarrod wrote: »

I think it should just be one changing room for everyone. There's no reason to separate genders in changing rooms.

I can think of several reasons.

scwazrh

If a gay man sees me naked in the changing room he'll soon go straight. Problem solved