Going out with a farmer

earnyourturns

Know this thread has been done a few times before, but just thought I'd bring the topic up again if that's okay? Anyway, I've just started going out with a dairy farmer, old friend of mine, friendship tipped over into a fling a few months ago and after a bit of a rocky start tipped over into going out with each other.

Dealing with the usual issues of him having to bail on dates at the last minute to fix an irrigator/not being able to see him this weekend cause he's putting seed in the ground (should explain that I'm now living in NZ, so we're a bit back to front with the tasks!). I'm not from a rural background, though very outdoorsy and do a lot of skiing, multi-day hiking, mountain running etc, so pretty used to being dirty and mucky. And enjoy being up on the farm as well; so far, our "couple activities" have included irrigating, fencing, drenching with his dad, feeding out silage, flinging tyres onto the silage pit, drafting stock. I've also learned how to milk

Anyway! Just looking for any advice/warnings what to expect when going out with a farmer!

redzerologhlen

Nothing bad to expect at all, us farmers are a great bunch...are you any good to pitch bales of hay

blue5000

My advice would be to unlearn how to milk.....fast

darragh_haven

blue5000 wrote: »

My advice would be to unlearn how to milk.....fast

True. Stay out of the parlour. Or you'll be asked to help out every week.

earnyourturns

Ha true, already regretting learning how to fence...

kevthegaff

ye they get sick of the novelty after awhile, i think ill go for a rural girl the next time!

AntrimGlens

Have you a friend for Bob?

grazeaway

when my better half and i started going out the poor girl could end up doing anything in our place. her friends would be talking about what thet did over the weekend and she would be telling them about herding cows or pulling calves. i even roped her into transporting bales for me one evening as i had a cow calving and we had dinner plans, the uncle got a fair fright when he saw her up on the tractor with a trailer load of bales on it and no sign of me.

simx

grazeaway wrote: »

when my better half and i started going out the poor girl could end up doing anything in our place. her friends would be talking about what thet did over the weekend and she would be telling them about herding cows or pulling calves. i even roped her into transporting bales for me one evening as i had a cow calving and we had dinner plans, the uncle got a fair fright when he saw her up on the tractor with a trailer load of bales on it and no sign of me.

She any sisters?

freedominacup

Unless you're looking for a career change keep away from the yard. Other than the early spring don't take too much of the "I had to", we're all legends at finding problems that must be attended to at the last minute but most of them can wait until morning.

This is said as the dairy farming husband of a dairy farmers daughter who has never milked a cow on my farm though she's well capable of running a parlour on her own and often did it before she met me. A bit of seperation is healthy.

mf240

If you find a large bottle of lube, some ropes and something that looks like a medieval torture device in the boot of his car don't worry he's not into S and M.

In fact he probably thinks S and M is something he should be vaccinating the cows for!!

razor8

small hands are useful at lambing time!!

pakalasa

Or if you find syringes and white powder around the place, coupled with dark areas around the eyes and slurry speech, it can only mean one thing. Calving is in full swing.

grazeaway

simx wrote: »

She any sisters?

one, but she says she retired from farming at 15

bob charles

I always discourage my female friends from have any long term connections with a full time farmer , its a life I would not like any lady to endure. most of the full time farmers are as busy as blue ass flies and work all the hours available to keep the show on the road

Anyways these friends of yours?

grazeaway

bob charles wrote: »

I always discourage my female friends from have any long term connections with a full time farmer , its a life I would not like any lady to endure. most of the full time farmers are as busy as blue ass flies and work all the hours available to keep the show on the road

Anyways these friends of yours?

rememeber most of us wouldnt be here if our parents hadnt taken a fancy to farmer.

hugo29

bob charles wrote: »

I always discourage my female friends from have any long term connections with a full time farmer , its a life I would not like any lady to endure. most of the full time farmers are as busy as blue ass flies and work all the hours available to keep the show on the road

Anyways these friends of yours?

bob you have female friends;)

notsobusy

I'm going out with a dairy farmer 4 years and I have never learned out to milk! He always discourages me. The only thing I want to learn is how to drive a tractor and he is alway reluctant to show me.

I work outdoors too but with horses so I stick to what I know he he does what he does

My only advice would be don't get too involved and just listen to him when he wants to have a moan.

hugo29

1.build a changing room, so ya wont have to nag the poor fella when he comes into the house covered in head to toe in muck
2. Install a seperate washing machine in same room so good washing machine does not get clogged up with silage, hay, nails, etc
3. get used to rough hands

yellow50HX

hugo29 wrote: »

1.build a changing room, so ya wont have to nag the poor fella when he comes into the house covered in head to toe in muck
2. Install a seperate washing machine in same room so good washing machine does not get clogged up with silage, hay, nails, etc
3. get used to rough hands

was planning on building a garage onto the house purely for this reason to was turned down by the planners. currently walking out to a small shed next to the house where i keep my work clothes, overalls and wellys

i use moisturier on my hands, a tip i picked up from my dad and uncle. peopel comment that we have farmers hands but soft skin

hugo29

yellow50HX wrote: »

was planning on building a garage onto the house purely for this reason to was turned down by the planners. currently walking out to a small shed next to the house where i keep my work clothes, overalls and wellys

i use moisturier on my hands, a tip i picked up from my dad and uncle. peopel comment that we have farmers hands but soft skin

i have the very same shed, :

earnyourturns

All very good advice...

grumpyfarmer

Im engaged to the grumpy farmer and i would definitely agree with alot of points especially about the hands (moisturise), seperate washing machine and the shed im sick of the muck/cow poo (since i cant call it ****e) on my would be clean floors. Im not allowed on the farm so our time is very limited as he doesnt get a full day off any day. He worsk very long hours its sometimes 9pm before we would have dinner so for a city girl it has been a major change but I wouldnt change a thing except maybe the lack of weekends away.

From
The Grumpy Farmers Other Half

loveta

[QUOTE=earnyourturns;8

Dealing with the usual issues of him having to bail on dates at the last minute to fix an irrigator/not being able to see him this weekend cause he's putting seed in the ground

; so far, our "couple activities" have included irrigating, fencing, drenching with his dad, feeding out silage, flinging tyres onto the silage pit, drafting stock. I've also learned how to milk

Anyway! Just looking for any advice/warnings what to expect when going out with a farmer![/QUOTE]

Being a dairy farmer "married with a family" i think WTF you guys are only going out and he is bailing on ya already and dates include fencing ect ect when this is ment to be the romance and fun times whats the future going to hold??? Maybe thats what you want out of life? If not i am afraid the writing is on the wall:(

ash23

I got dumped for calving season......well, he wanted a "break" because he felt bad he couldn't give me his time. Since then cue his fellow farmer friends trying to explain that he has such a big farm that I have to try and understand.

My advice, be prepared to be completely abandoned from Jan to end of April. If you're ok with that you should be fine. If not, then (like myself), cut your losses now.

redzerologhlen

Is this you op

hugo29

redzerologhlen wrote: »

Is this you op

would ya look at the udder on 155:D

quadboy

Bit of a high step no? or should I say thigh. We had no parlour just stalls and looks easier than this the cows will slip off

Kovu

quadboy wrote: »

Bit of a high step no? or should I say thigh. We had no parlour just stalls and looks easier than this the cows will slip off

Full of romance aren't you

pakalasa

Where did you take that pic, Redzer?

Viewtodiefor

redzerologhlen wrote: »

Is this you op

When is your discussion group meeting redzer? I'm there anyway

redzerologhlen

pakalasa wrote: »

Where did you take that pic, Redzer?

In kevthegaffs yard the other morning after his date...went well id say

quadboy

Kovu Murr wrote: »

Full of romance aren't you

Ah milking is no time for romance

hairyprincess

My other half is a farmer, just cattle thankfully as he also has a fulltime job!

My Sundays and holidays generally consist of dosing and moving cattle, shovelling silage - I'm a quare hand with a grape, tagging calves and counselling my OH when he's had a bad day. Unfortunately I haven't been present at any births yet! That's my nest goal! It's been a very hard year so hopefully the summer will improve things. I think seeding is on the agenda this weekend!

It can be difficult to get a night together as I also have commitments. I'm used to plans getting cancelled but he's worth it

blue5000

hairyprincess wrote: »

My other half is a farmer, just cattle thankfully as he also has a fulltime job!

My Sundays and holidays generally consist of dosing and moving cattle, shovelling silage - I'm a quare hand with a grape, tagging calves and counselling my OH when he's had a bad day. Unfortunately I haven't been present at any births yet! That's my nest goal! It's been a very hard year so hopefully the summer will improve things. I think seeding is on the agenda this weekend!

It can be difficult to get a night together as I also have commitments. I'm used to plans getting cancelled but he's worth it

Careful now:eek::eek:

hugo29

redzerologhlen wrote: »

In kevthegaffs yard the other morning after his date...went well id say

No wonder he disappeared for a week:D
Where were you hiding

kevthegaff

shes out milking, ive another one in the bed with me!

hugo29

kevthegaff wrote: »

shes out milking, ive another one in the bed with me!

Get her in tis cold out, maybe get her into bed with ye:D

Bizzum

hugo29 wrote: »

Get her in tis cold out, maybe get her into bed with ye:D

Hard enough to keep one half right! :-)

earnyourturns

AntrimGlens wrote: »

Have you a friend for Bob?

I do indeed, isn't she a stunner?

DrGreenthumb

worst case scenario he might try to plough you out of it

earnyourturns

loveta wrote: »

Being a dairy farmer "married with a family" i think WTF you guys are only going out and he is bailing on ya already and dates include fencing ect ect when this is ment to be the romance and fun times whats the future going to hold??? Maybe thats what you want out of life? If not i am afraid the writing is on the wall:(

Well you were right, we split up at the weekend cause his heart wasn't in it, he was just coasting. Very sad but ah well. Am sure I will find another someone down the line, this time I can wow them with my break fencing skills and knowledge of silage and everything

freedominacup

earnyourturns wrote: »

Well you were right, we split up at the weekend cause his heart wasn't in it, he was just coasting. Very sad but ah well. Am sure I will find another someone down the line, this time I can wow them with my break fencing skills and knowledge of silage and everything

I blame the mammy. You just know in his own mind he's convinced he's an incredible catch and you were lucky he allowed you hang around with him. He can't really help this it's how he was reared.

loveta

earnyourturns wrote: »

Well you were right, we split up at the weekend cause his heart wasn't in it, he was just coasting. Very sad but ah well. Am sure I will find another someone down the line, this time I can wow them with my break fencing skills and knowledge of silage and everything

Sorry to hear that but being honest when your on the outside looking in the picture was much clearer to read, i know this il sound like crap now but the old saying is so true "you will know" when you meet Mr right, it will just click with you, and you with him but in the mean time my advice is just have fun on your journey in finding him

earnyourturns

Yup the truth hurts but you can only deny it for so long. Ah well.

grazeaway

you never know, there might be a nice tillage farmer out there that would be around on every wet day.

dont mean to be mean but if its not for you then your right to walk away, not poitn waitng for a maybe. plenty of other men out there that are into outdoor activites but have the time to enjoy them.

earnyourturns

No, I love the farming, it's just that this particular farmer had his heart closed to me. Anyway! This is getting a bit emotional for this forum Went to look at some Dexter Cows with a friend and her mum last weekend, they were adorable too.

notsobusy

Ah sorry to hear that. You'll find your Mr Right......!!

quadboy

Im heading to NZ for Christmas, so ya know like!!!

pakalasa

quadboy wrote: »

Im heading to NZ for Christmas, so ya know like!!!

I think she'd be looking for more of a Quadman.

quadboy

pakalasa wrote: »

I think she'd be looking for more of a Quadman.

Ah feck it