How should I ask him out?

Flaker

Right, some advice on this please!!

The story is I started a class (it's a type of fitness class) in January. It's supposed to be mixed, but it's really only guys, usually about 20 plus myself and my friend who is also female. We are also the only newbies in the class so the instructor probably spends a bit more time with us, showing us what to do.

Now, the instructor is a god (well, I think so anyway!). The first time I saw him, he walked out wearing one of those tight under-amour tops and myself and my friend nearly collapsed he was so hot! My friend is engaged, so not interested in him in that way, but there was definately instant attraction between me and him.

He has made it obvious enough that he likes me too in that if he is demonstrating something, he will usually use me to demonstrate on, he uses any excuse to touch me or for me to touch him and always goes particularly out of his way to talk to me. My friend has even commented on it more than a few times.

Anyway, as you can imagine, a class full of hulking lads is not the easiest place to chat someone up so I'm unsure of what to do. He doesn't have a girlfriend (I know someone who knows him and asked!). There is an event coming up that myself, my friend and coincidently, two of the guys in the class are going to. Should I ask him to come along? It's related to the sport we're all doing. I'm very nervous in case he says no or isn't as interested as I think he is. It's wrecking me head!!

jimbobaloobob

Go for it, invite him along without it being a date.

Take it handy and enjoy the progress

Passenger

Most blokes I'm sure would appreciate the woman taking the initiative and asking. But there is a kind of teacher/student dynamic that may be disrupted if you do take the plunge. Maybe wait until the end of the course to prevent any potential awkwardness in class. Only you know best.

baby and crumble

All I can think of now is that video for "Call on Me" by Eric Prydz...

I agree though with the poster who said about it maybe being weird going out with your teacher. Jut something to think about.

Good luck though!!!

Daveysil15

OP - as long as you're not a flake, you could chance your arm. Some apt user names here.

Challo

Go for it but I wonder if you're overestimating his interest. I'm in a similar situation.

Only one way to find out though!

Gorilla Rising

Do not make him a mixtape! Or did I miss the joke?!

Based on the fact you're unsure if he's interested:

Ask him out casually -

'There's this thing coming up if you fancy going just send us a text'. Tell him where and when and give him your number (if he doesn't already have it what with being in that class).

Longford Lass

DEFINITELY go for it!
I was in a similiar situation to you 12+ mths ago. This guy was coming into the shop I work in for about 6 mths when 1 day I casually suggested that we'd go for a coffee sometime. Nearly 7 mths later and we're going strong!
Its the things you dont do in your life you end up regretting.
Just do it I say! Good Luck!

Flaker

Thanks for all the replies guys!

Just a couple of things; it's an ongoing class so I'm afraid i can't wait til it's over to ask him out cos it won't be!

And i get where ye are coming with the whole student - teacher thing. That's one of the things that made me come on here to ask for opinions. It's not the usual situation i find myself in!

Anyway i think what i will do is casually mention that some of us are going and is he/would he like to go.

The class is early next week so i will let you know what he says.

Unfortunately the event isn't til early May so if he does say yes you'll (and me as well!!) have to wait til then to see if anything comes of it!

Gorilla Rising

To be honest, I'd leave it 'til closer the time to ask him.

Ask him a week/week and a half before it.

It's just strange being asked out 3 and half weeks in advance - and if he said yes, then you'd be talking about it and there'd be a big build up to it ya know..

Flaker

Hi Fortune Wookie. You'd be right if i was asking him out on a date but I'm not really. I'm only asking if he wants to go to something with a group of us. And also if i leave it too late to say it to him the tickets will be sold out and then where would i be?!!!

Gorilla Rising

Flaker wrote: »

Hi Fortune Wookie. You'd be right if i was asking him out on a date but I'm not really. I'm only asking if he wants to go to something with a group of us. And also if i leave it too late to say it to him the tickets will be sold out and then where would i be?!!!

Say nothing about tickets. Get an extra for him and don't say anything.

When the time comes just say you happen to have an extra ticket for this thing and would you like to come along.

I realise you'd be taking a risk buying a ticket, but it's how'd I'd go/have gone about asking a girl out before.

It just takes the pressure off him having to go and get a ticket then ya know? As silly as that sounds, you just want the whole thing to flow.

Flaker

Hmmm. I will think about it. But i dunno - getting him a ticket seems a bit much to be honest.

Gorilla Rising

Flaker wrote: »

Hmmm. I will think about it. But i dunno - getting him a ticket seems a bit much to be honest.

Yeah, but he wouldn't know about it....

Anyway, that's my advice. Best of luck whatever you decide to do. Hope there's a happy ending in this.

The Pheasant

Just hang back at the end of the class and ask if he'd like to go for a drink sometime - if he likes you as much as you say he'll definitely say yes...he'd probably appreciate you taking the initiative because he might be reluctant to ask because of the whole student - teacher thing

syklops

Flaker wrote: »

Anyway, as you can imagine, a class full of hulking lads is not the easiest place to chat someone up so I'm unsure of what to do. He doesn't have a girlfriend (I know someone who knows him and asked!). There is an event coming up that myself, my friend and coincidently, two of the guys in the class are going to. Should I ask him to come along? It's related to the sport we're all doing. I'm very nervous in case he says no or isn't as interested as I think he is. It's wrecking me head!!

Very simple. Say to him near the end of the next nights session that you and your friend and her husband are going for a drink after the session and would he like to join you for a chat to talk about some of the techniques. Your friends husband is interested in joining the class aswell. Have the friend make excuses early on and have to go (water leak, baby minder, mothers stroke, whatever). After an evening like that you will be in a better position to decide about the thing in 3 weeks time.

Tasden

Is there any chance he is just trying to make you feel more included/welcome in a mainly male dominated class. Not saying it is the case just that it could be a possibility..
Obviously you would know more than me but just keep it in mind and see how he acts in the next class
Sorry not trying to be negative or anything!

Flaker

Tasden wrote: »

Is there any chance he is just trying to make you feel more included/welcome in a mainly male dominated class. Not saying it is the case just that it could be a possibility..
Obviously you would know more than me but just keep it in mind and see how he acts in the next class
Sorry not trying to be negative or anything!

Very possibly,but it doesn't really feel like that. Guess there's only one way to find out right!!

ciaracp

No harm in asking, if he says yes-great, if he says no then as my friend says.....on the scale of world problems! At least you know eitherway.

I used to see a guy on the street I worked on everyday for ages, we used to look at each other and the attraction was there, he went to talk to me one day and I didn't know what to say, got embarrassed and legged it.
Still think about him to this very day and wonder what if...

Oh Mr hottie on Earlsfor Terrace where are you

Flaker

ciaracp wrote: »

No harm in asking, if he says yes-great, if he says no then as my friend says.....on the scale of world problems! At least you know eitherway.

I used to see a guy on the street I worked on everyday for ages, we used to look at each other and the attraction was there, he went to talk to me one day and I didn't know what to say, got embarrassed and legged it.
Still think about him to this very day and wonder what if...

Oh Mr hottie on Earlsfor Terrace where are you

Ah no! As some one else said in an earlier post - it's better to regret the things you did do rather than those you didn't do. And you're right, if he says no, well nobody died did they?

jimbobaloobob

Now your giving yourself the advice in that last post which re emphasises what most have said. Go for it and enjoy it.

Flaker

Just to let you all know, I didn't have to ask him to go to the night out, he mentioned in converstion that he was going anyway.

So it's all good for now. Thanks everyone. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

WittyKitty1

pretend to faint in the class, get your friend to suggest he does mouth to mouth resuscitation... What could go wrong?:p

Just stay back after wards and and chat with him for a while, and suggest you meet up sometime for a drink or whatever!