Jesus

kneemos

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

Celly Smunt

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

isn't that what happened the first time around anyway?

super_furry

Did you ever think what would happen if god was one of us? Just a slob like one of us or just a stranger on the bus?

Chevolution

He'd post a thread on AH asking people how he could make himself noticed without blowing peoples minds...........hold on a second!!!!

OneArt

The second coming is always more difficult because you're not as horny after the first one.

.Henry Sellers.

He'd go on celebrity bainisteoir.

kneemos

pmcmahon wrote: »

isn't that what happened the first time around anyway?

Thought it was more a gradual acceptance thing by conducting miracles and such,if we got some guy walking on water today I'm pretty sure there would be mass hysteria.

Pilotdude5

He could have already come back but was probably committed to a lock-ward.

smash

I'd kidnap him and create a wine company beside the ocean in the south of France. Overheads would be fcuk all.

Celly Smunt

smash wrote: »

I'd kidnap him and create a wine company beside the ocean in the south of France. Overheads would be fcuk all.

then open a bakery and fishmongers next door.

Rented Mule

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

Especially in your 40s.

Littlehorny

Saw a documentary once called Rivals to Jesus and it claimed that his story caught on better and lasted the test of time compared to other wise men at the time.

9959

kneemos wrote: »

Thought it was more a gradual acceptance thing by conducting miracles and such,if we got some guy walking on water today I'm pretty sure there would be mass hysteria.

Unfortunately the 'miracles conducted' wouldn't occur in Times Square to be witnessed by all and sundry, but rather somewhere such as Balinspittle or Knock, to be witnessed by superstitious half-blind octogenarians or delusional schoolchildren indoctrinated to within an inch of their lives.
Same as it ever was.

The King of Moo

He'd clone Hitler, then beat him up and throw him off a skyscraper.

Also dinosaurs.

Death and Taxes

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

If he did exist and I doubt it , it might be easier for him this time round as the most of the world is far more tolerant of gays, who knows he might even enter a civil partnership!

philologos

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

He caused riots the first tine round. The authorities were so furious at his teaching that they nailed Him to a cross of wood. You should read the Gospel of John.

kneemos

philologos wrote: »

He caused riots the first tine round. The authorities were so furious at his teaching that they nailed Him to a cross of wood. You should read the Gospel of John.

In a world of instant media the Youtube clips would be round the world in minutes.

DublinWriter

philologos wrote: »

The authorities Jews were so furious at his teaching that they had the authorities nail Him to a cross of wood. You should read the Gospel of John.

Fixed it for you, according to the gospel of John.

Real Life

philologos wrote: »

He caused riots the first tine round. The authorities were so furious at his teaching that they nailed Him to a cross of wood. You should read the Gospel of John.

and rightly so, people are getting the death sentence for much less.

In reality though i dont agree with the death sentence or the killing of anybody.

jd007

I'd love to see him on Jersey Shore

philologos

DublinWriter wrote: »

Fixed it for you, according to the gospel of John.

Technically John also points out that he hung there to pay the penalty for sin and take God's wrath on our behalf and that He rose again on the third day so that we can be forgiven.

That's perhaps the most fascinating part

smash

philologos wrote: »

Technically John also points out that he hung there to pay the penalty for sin and take God's wrath on our behalf and that He rose again on the third day so that we can be forgiven.

That's perhaps the most fascinating part

you mean the zombie bit? Yea perhaps... but it's been done to the death at this stage.

kowloon

He is the messiah, and I should know, I've followed a few.

(Was going to post the clip but Terry Jones' nutsack makes an appearance so I had best not)

Neewbie_noob

super_furry wrote: »

Did you ever think what would happen if god was one of us? Just a slob like one of us or just a stranger on the bus?

Bruce Almighty FTW

Death and Taxes

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

My OH reckons the second coming is easier and infinitly more enjoyable!:D

not yet

He'd ride that Maura whats her face live on tv. yeah the sexy one married to the TD. Then punch Dathi in the smug mush

DublinWriter

philologos wrote: »

Technically John also points out that he hung there to pay the penalty for sin and take God's wrath on our behalf

But technically, don't you believe that he was God?, you know, all that business with the shamrock?, the divinity of Christ, etc?

Fr_Dougal

philologos wrote: »

He rose again on the third day so that we can be forgiven.

That's perhaps the most fascinating part

I'm pretty sure, and you can quote me on this, he rose again because it was Easter and he had pucks of Easter eggs to get through.

Lyaiera

smash wrote: »

you mean the zombie bit? Yea perhaps... but it's been done to the death at this stage.

In fairness, at least he was a slow zombie, taking three days to rise and not one of them stupid new fast zombies for audiences that can't deal with suspense.

Delirium

philologos wrote: »

Technically John also points out that he hung there to pay the penalty for sin and take God's wrath on our behalf and that He rose again on the third day so that we can be forgiven.

That's perhaps the most fascinating part

Rising from the dead? Twin brother is more likely. Just like in the movie the Prestige :P

super_furry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--S8yIAhDB8

There was a really good mini-series about ten years ago that actually dealt with it is which Christopher Ecclestone was the second coming.

0ph0rce0

MEATSPIN.COM

That's Jesus, That's Is All

Death and Taxes

not yet wrote: »

He'd ride that Maura whats her face live on tv. yeah the sexy one married to the TD. Then punch Dathi in the smug mush

More likely he'd ride Daithi and punch maura in the mouth:D

senorwipesalot

http://www.google.ie/imgres?q=jackie+healy+rae+walking+on+water&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&tbo=d&biw=1280&bih=660&tbm=isch&tbnid=ZHgO5Uu34P_A1M:&imgrefurl=http://www.politics.ie/forum/oireachtas/131113-very-busy-jackie-healy-rae-refuses-answer-mileage-question-3.html&docid=ilq9G9sEb9mCnM&imgurl=http://www.brightidea.ie/jackiehealyrae/images/powerful.jpg&w=223&h=326&ei=JzStUJecKNKThgfLioDADQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=2&vpy=118&dur=5408&hovh=260&hovw=178&tx=89&ty=109&sig=100864081569384152140&page=1&tbnh=141&tbnw=91&start=0&ndsp=23&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0,i:82

kfallon

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

He'd join a bowling league

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idBhoV01ryo

Rayne Wooney

kneemos wrote: »

If Jesus was one of us how would he get himself noticed without blowing peoples minds or causing mass riots.The second coming is always the most difficult.

Do you have personal experience of this, or?

RATM

.Henry Sellers. wrote: »

He'd go on celebrity bainisteoir.

Jesus manages St.Joesphs

whatdoicare

Well, if he came back to where he originally showed up he'd be fairly fecked what with all the other "jesus'" walking around claiming to be him.

franktheplank

Second season syndrome?

gobnaitolunacy

Imagine if he never existed.

There would be just Jews and Muslims kicking the crap out of each other.

enda1

Sure he already had his apparent second coming when he came back down on the Sunday for a chat. This would be his third really.

Duggy747

Few thousand years ago:
"I'm Jesus, son of God Almighty!"

Men in white: "Praise the Lord!!"

Today:
"I'm Jesus, son of God Almighty!"

Men in white: "Come on now, Paul, time to take your meds or you won't be allowed to play your board games.............come on, nice big gulp...............good man.............

yeppydeppy

OneArt wrote: »

The second coming is always more difficult because you're not as horny after the first one.

Rented Mule wrote: »

Especially in your 40s.

Speak for yourselves!

(Although technically I'm not 40 yet)