Are men more likely to sleep around?

LeeHoffmann

There´s a thread in TGC entitled ´1 woman for the rest of your life?´. It seems to me that many of the posters on that thread think that men have a greater urge to sleep around, even when in a relationship, and that this might make them more prone to cheating and/or less likely to commit to a relationship. I´m interested to find out whether the folks of TLL would agree with this. So what do you think ladies and gentlemen?

cloud_dancer

LeeHoffmann wrote: »

There´s a thread in TGC entitled ´1 woman for the rest of your life?´. It seems to me that many of the posters on that thread think that men have a greater urge to sleep around, even when in a relationship, and that this might make them more prone to cheating and/or less likely to commit to a relationship. I´m interested to find out whether the folks of TLL would agree with this. So what do you think ladies and gentlemen?

I think men and women are equally as likely to be sleeping around. After all if men are sleeping around they are sleeping around with women unless they are gay. Maybe you hear more men bragging about scoring whereas women are not likely to broadcast their one night stands. It's kept to themselves where possible.

In a relationship I think one party is as likely as the other party to experience lust for someone else but most adults can keep it under controll if the relationship is giving them what they need. We are not animals. Saying men are "wired" to sleep around as was a theme in the other thread is just an excuse and a cop out for men that can't keep it in their trousers. Most emotionally mature people can be in a monogamous relationship without having to constantly control urges. If not then you need to seriously question if the relationship is right for you.

Personally I will only get a wandering eye when I am unhappy and that's the signal to work on things or leave.

LeeHoffmann

if men are sleeping around they are sleeping around with women unless they are gay.

it isn´t necessarily a 1:1 ratio. It could be that one woman is sleeping with 6 cheating guys for example. I´m inclined to agree with you about the urges argument being an excuse, and about it being a sign that things aren´t right in the relationship. I´ve only been in my relationship 8 years though so I was wondering if time changes things, in other people´s experience

seachto7

Men are no more or less likely to sleep around than women.

cloud_dancer

LeeHoffmann wrote: »

it isn´t necessarily a 1:1 ratio. It could be that one woman is sleeping with 6 cheating guys for example. I´m inclined to agree with you about the urges argument being an excuse, and about it being a sign that things aren´t right in the relationship. I´ve only been in my relationship 8 years though so I was wondering if time changes things, in other people´s experience

I thought the question was "are men more likely to sleep around?" in general rather than just in relationships like the previous thread. That's where my thinking that both men and women must sleep around in varying degrees comes from. From experience with friends women are more likely to lie about partners so it may seem that men sleep around more.

sharper

I think that social pressures around manliness cause guys to play up their desire to sleep around. A guy that sleeps with many women (within reason) has his status increased and so a guy that claims he has this option available to him might feel more manly and powerful.

Women are much more empowered than they used to be but there's still a lingering stigma around sleeping around. Women that do this are "sluts" or worse and so women are much less likely to openly express their desire to do so.

_petulia_

LeeHoffmann wrote: »

There´s a thread in TGC entitled ´1 woman for the rest of your life?´. It seems to me that many of the posters on that thread think that men have a greater urge to sleep around, even when in a relationship, and that this might make them more prone to cheating and/or less likely to commit to a relationship. I´m interested to find out whether the folks of TLL would agree with this. So what do you think ladies and gentlemen?

I think it depends on the individual to be honest, I hate stereotyping men.

isle of man

It is in there nature.
monogamy is only a vary recent thing brought about by the church. males evolved to breed. To try and change him in a few hundred years is never going to work.
Woman make love. men have sex. Men do it because they can. Ask any man why he cheated on the wife/gf and chances are he say because he could. Ask a woman why she cheated and most will say she felt loved wanted or just a sense of well being with that person. woman need emotion to cheat men do not.
There only sorry once they have been caught.

But that is not to say its right and it does not really give a man a good reason to. Just the why he does it.
The fact men and woman are wired so vary diffrent in there heads its amazing they last so long.

bajer100

Men are much more likely to sleep around. God designed men to sow their seed in as many fields as possible - he designed women to limit the crop to one farmer. I'm an atheist, but this simple description of the difference between men and women is quite accurate.

Macha

bajer100 wrote: »

Men are much more likely to sleep around. God designed men to sow their seed in as many fields as possible - he designed women to limit the crop to one farmer. I'm an atheist, but this simple description of the difference between men and women is quite accurate.

An odd statement from an atheist but anyway, do you have any evidence of this? I don't see any big biological driver for women to just stick with one man. In fact it would seem like a good strategy to sleep around and let the strongest win. Some research shows women are more likely to cheat when they're at their most fertile.

Wibbs

In my experience anyway it's six of one, half dozen of the other. I've known more men to sleep around when single, but more women to have affairs when not. They were more the minority in both genders, though the men played the numbers up and the women played the numbers down as a general thing. The only other thing I've noticed was age related. IE more women seemed to cheat on partners in their 20's, but that trailed right off in their 30's, but more men started to cheat in their 30's(and older). Again they weren't the majority, the average. Just IME most men and most women were pretty much equal on this sleeping around score.

seachto7

bajer100 wrote: »

Men are much more likely to sleep around. God designed men to sow their seed in as many fields as possible - he designed women to limit the crop to one farmer. I'm an atheist, but this simple description of the difference between men and women is quite accurate.

Absolute rubbish....:rolleyes:

eviltwin

I can only speak from my own experience, I have a good mix of male and female friends. In my circle the women don't talk about it as much but are definately getting more sex. The men talk about nothing else sometimes but they nearly always go home alone. I think if you are talking about cheating its the same from both sexes, maybe just that women are a bit more secretive and better at hiding it than men.

cloud_dancer

eviltwin wrote: »

I can only speak from my own experience, I have a good mix of male and female friends. In my circle the women don't talk about it as much but are definately getting more sex. The men talk about nothing else sometimes but they nearly always go home alone. I think if you are talking about cheating its the same from both sexes, maybe just that women are a bit more secretive and better at hiding it than men.

I agree, women are much more secretive about it especially about the number of people they've slept with. Guys sometimes lie and say they've slept with a girl when they haven't. I've seen a few guys called out on this. Even had to do it myself many years ago!

Many a guy thinks his wife/gf has had a fraction of the partners she's had. One couple in particular springs to mind, she told him she had 4 partners before him but 40 would be a far more realistic number. They are together years, have a wedding planned and he is none the wiser.

I had this discussion with a group of friends recently and surprisingly all of them lied to their oh about their numbers if they discussed it. Some just don't share. Myself, i'd rather not say anything than lie to make myself look more innocent. I'm not saying all women are creative with the truth but it is common