Bestest inventions that have yet to be invented.

marshbaboon

First of all, no I have not been drinking.

Second of all, this is a serious thread for serious people.


I've been toying around with the idea of totally going on dragons dens with two inventions i have, which I haven't quite actually invented yet.

The first is a tongue cleaner that doesn't make you gag.

The second is a machine that removes dust from the air, before it settles, in your home... To remove the need for dusting, ever.


As soon as I figure out how these inventions will actually work you'll see me on BBC2 having a lovely chat with Theo Paphitis.

Until that time AH, what are your inventions that you've not yet invented?

Sharpshooter

I'd patent your sig!

AlmightyCushion

The first problem you have is easily solved by tongue transplants.

The second one is a little trickier but it can still be solved. Basically we need to completely redesign houses. They need to be completely airtight. Then when you leave for work, you can press a button that will completely fill the house with water which will wash all the dust away. Sure it'll kill your pet cat and you'll need to buy a new TV/fridge etc every day but these are a small price to pay for a dust free house.

marshbaboon

Sharpshooter wrote: »

I'd patent your sig!

I didn't even have signatures displayed, forgot what mine was until you said that.

Suppose it's alright to laugh at myself now.

Uriel.

an invention to regrow Pirate's eyes, so they no longer need to wear a patch.

Won't somebody think of the poor pirates

policarp

The woman decypher code. . .

getzls

A machine that will let you understand a woman.

marshbaboon

SNAP. I was going to call it the venus project, but I think that's already copyrighted.

Where To

A talking picture box.

Sharpshooter

marshbaboon wrote: »

Suppose it's alright to laugh at myself now.

Laughter releases endorphins,endorphins are hormones that are released into your body when you exercise or exert yourself.:D

Win win re your sig!

TheStook

Deodorant for Dogs

marshbaboon

TheStook wrote: »

Deodorant for Dogs

That's actually genius. Write that down.

TheStook

marshbaboon wrote: »

That's actually genius. Write that down.

Wanna team up? you provide the capital and I'll provide...things.

Sharpshooter

marshbaboon wrote: »

I've been toying around with the idea of totally going on dragons dens with two inventions i have, which I haven't quite actually invented yet.

Until that time AH, what are your inventions that you've not yet invented?

I see what you did there!:pac:

marshbaboon

TheStook wrote: »

Wanna team up? you provide the capital and I'll provide...things.

Capital? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA. Good one.

Sharpshooter wrote: »

I see what you did there!:pac:

I DON'T EVEN SEE WHAT I DID THERE.... AND I DID IT

B.A._Baracus

*Mental note, steal op's ideas* .... :pac:


But to be serious the weird thing about inventions these days is that they are going more technological than basic (I mean app this, app that) But I still believe there has to be loads of simple basic items out there to be invented.

I have no clue tho

marshbaboon

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

*Mental note, steal op's ideas* .... :pac:


But to be serious the weird thing about inventions these days is that they are going more technological than basic (I mean app this, app that) But I still believe there has to be loads of simple basic items out there to be invented.

I have no clue tho

The best inventions always solve a fundamentally basic problem.

tdv123

The ice-cream glove.

Jimoslimos

Well the second one has kind of been solved as well. Most clean room environments operate under positive pressure keeping dust and other particulate matter out. Various air filters, such as HEPA and electrostatic precipitators can trap most dust before it settles, as long as they're kept running.

/Buzz Killington

Kurz

marshbaboon wrote: »

As soon as I figure out how these inventions will actually work you'll see me on BBC2 having a lovely chat with Theo Paphitis.

Until that time AH, what are your inventions that you've not yet invented?

A brit-muck cleaner that washes the horrible odor of brit off of Irish people. I'll be presenting it to the fat woman and the gombeen men on the proper Oirish Dragon Den in the hope that they'll invest their whole €300.

B.A._Baracus

marshbaboon wrote: »

The best inventions always solve a fundamentally basic problem.

Exactly.

I am in my kitchen as I type this and there has to be over a hundred different inventions that at one point in time someone thought of that are in exsistence. There has to be more that people havent tought about.

Only question is what.

Rynox45

I'm working on a series of slingshots designed to launch a person into space while they're held within an airtight bubble.

It's a much cheaper alternative to space shuttles and combines with my "Straight-through" tunnelling system to get people across the world quickly, it should earn me enough money to retire to the moon.

Squ

Can you patent stuff that hasn't been patented, like staking a land claim in the old west?

I'd patent the fork.. Live off the royalties

pragmatic1

getzls wrote: »

A machine that will let you understand a woman.

Women eh.

pragmatic1

Squ wrote: »

Can you patent stuff that hasn't been patented, like staking a land claim in the old west?

I'd patent the fork.. Live off the royalties

Yep. Gene Simmons did it with a bag with a dollar sign on it.

mickrock

A workable fanny magnet would sell like hotcakes.

IvySlayer

You know when you lose your remote control? A button on the TV/Sky box that makes the remote light up/make a sound.

Ellis Dee

marshbaboon wrote: »

---

Second of all, this is a serious thread for serious people.

----

WTF is it doing here then?:):):)

Jimoslimos

Jimoslimos wrote: »

Well the second one has kind of been solved as well. Most clean room environments operate under positive pressure keeping dust and other particulate matter out. Various air filters, such as HEPA and electrostatic precipitators can trap most dust before it settles, as long as they're kept running.

This works well in a clinical environment where patients are immuno suppressed and at higher risk of contracting infections. However, research suggests that children who live in a dust/dirt free house, are more likely to pick up infections, or suffer from asthma and other respiratory illnesses, as their immune systems are not being strengthened.

So there :P

I want an app that makes your phone a remote control.

castletownman

A car that doesn't start until the seatbelt is strapped in. Can be regulated so it knows how many passengers are in the car so which seatbelts need to be strapped in accordingly.

Your welcome, road users.

3ndahalfof6

scissors

Duggy747

A left-handed toaster that makes toast for left-handed people.

Or a device that allows you to store you dreams onto an external machine. You might have to get a USB port installed on your head but everyone will think you're from The Matrix, then :pac:

ejmaztec

A heat-resistant wifi-enabled chocolate fireguard.

Anyone

The ability to punch someone over the internet.

Mr. CooL ICE

Deleted User wrote: »

I want an app that makes your phone a remote control.

This has been done in the past. Unfortunately, most TVs use infra-red connections to the remote, which most modern phones don't have. Go back 5-8 years and many, many phones had infra-red (due to bluetooth being too expensive back then) as their wireless data connection. However, infra-red was phased out because of bluetooth and wifi in general.

/Buzz Killington Jr

Lando Griffin

LordChessington wrote: »

Deleted User wrote: »

I want an app that makes your phone a remote control.

This has been done in the past. Unfortunately, most TVs use infra-red connections to the remote, which most modern phones don't have. Go back 5-8 years and many, many phones had infra-red (due to bluetooth being too expensive back then) as their wireless data connection. However, infra-red was phased out because of bluetooth and wifi in general.

/Buzz Killington Jr

The new Samsung TV can be worked from the Samsung iphone.

Cienciano

LordChessington wrote: »

This has been done in the past. Unfortunately, most TVs use infra-red connections to the remote, which most modern phones don't have. Go back 5-8 years and many, many phones had infra-red (due to bluetooth being too expensive back then) as their wireless data connection. However, infra-red was phased out because of bluetooth and wifi in general.

/Buzz Killington Jr

As Lando said, this is standard now. The way it works is wi-fi. If your tv is connected to the same wifi as your phone, it works as a remote. Very handy when you can't find the remote, of if you're seriously lazy like me, if the remote is on the other side of the room and you can't be arsed getting it.
The problem is, most people have a digital box which the remote doesn't connect to.
It's also used in some audio equipment too. You can download apps for your particular system to browse folders, create playlists etc.

Colmustard

A cold waterbottle.

Raingear that does not make you sweat and keeps you dry, (believe it or not, that doesn't exist yet).

getz

TheStook wrote: »

Deodorant for Dogs

that is out there already,how about a electric bicycle that runs on solar power

Talib Fiasco

A reliable government...na na I kid I kid...

I actually had a brilliant idea for an invention that I forgot. I was half drunk at the time but I assure you it was a genuine invention. It had something to do with a calculator/phone sort of thing that basically had stuff programmed into it that would help you with household tasks or whatever. Sounded amazing at the time but forgot what made it so amazing.

Something I just thought of the other day but probably is out there already, waterproof and vehicle proof road surfaces. I mean the weather and heavy goods vehicles passing the by roads near our house have totally destroyed the roads in little over a week. Potholes everywhere. There surely can be something done with mixing in some miracle thing into the tar/gravel/whatever.

opti76

central locking for my gaff.. walk out .. click thebutton all windows and doors lock.. no more "did i leave the patio door open"

Colmustard

Central locking for houses. I really think this could be a goer, hit a button your house doors lock and your alarm is armed.

Talib Fiasco

opti76 wrote: »

central locking for my gaff.. walk out .. click thebutton all windows and doors lock.. no more "did i leave the patio door open"

Mmmm good one. Or 'Did you leave the hallway light on'...or 'Did you leave on the telly and turn it over to RTE1 for the news and the Late Late Show??

marshbaboon

OMG... just had best idea so far... A mind control tampon.

BRB NEED TO WORK ON SCEMATICS.

Colmustard

opti76 wrote: »

central locking for my gaff.. walk out .. click thebutton all windows and doors lock.. no more "did i leave the patio door open"

Great minds, yeah I don't understand why it is not about already, it would be so convenient.

B.A._Baracus

marshbaboon wrote: »

OMG... just had best idea so far... A mind control tampon.

BRB NEED TO WORK ON SCEMATICS.

marshbaboon wrote: »

Second of all, this is a serious thread for serious people.

serious indeed.

Squ

Colmustard wrote: »

Raingear that does not make you sweat and keeps you dry, (believe it or not, that doesn't exist yet).

You can get gortex breathable rain gear in halpenny golf. Dry and sweat free.. Big bucks though

Colmustard

Squ wrote: »

You can get gortex breathable rain gear in halpenny golf. Dry and sweat free.. Big bucks though

I tried that and it cost 120 quid and I am still not happy with it.

I use it for cycling and it just gets to warm and the lighter stuff is only shower proof but not water proof.

CK73

recently I set about inventing a contraption that meant you could carry to wheeled suitcases together in tandem. I was rather excited, that is until my sister showed me a link to the very item I had invented for $15.99.

Mortified!!!

Fox_In_Socks

policarp wrote: »

The woman decypher code. . .

getzls wrote: »

A machine that will let you understand a woman.

marshbaboon wrote: »

SNAP. I was going to call it the venus project, but I think that's already copyrighted.

Observe that these three replies were made between 3.00am and 3.30am on a Saturday night/morning in August, presumably after each poster came home after a night out.

Those evil women who didn't succumb to your charm!:mad::pac:

Dwork

Anti-alcohol. A drink you can quaff down the morning after a heavy night when you absolutely have to drive somwhere to do somthing but have that nagging feeling that you might still be a bit over the limit.

Enter Anti-Alcohol, the beverage that neutralises the residual alcohol in your body within minutes. I have technical sh1t to work out, like what it's made of and other stuff, but I reckon it's gonna be massive. Probably.