As useless as....

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

A one legged man in an arse kicking contest

tits on a bull

an ejector seat onboard a helicopter

Im sure you all get the picture. Anybody heard anymore good ones?

Captain Chaos

jar_of_coins wrote: »

an ejector seat onboard a helicopter

They exist, the blades fire off before the seat though.

A c0ck flavoured lollipop.

hondasam

Nun in a brothel.

It wasn't me!

Tits on a fish.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

hondasam wrote: »

Nun in a brothel.

She'd probably be from ruhama and trying to convince the hooker to join the convent.

beertons

.....fireproof matches

guitarzero

Haha...as useless....hahahah...as a....HAHAHAHAAH....as a fruit shop....HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...sorry, but HAHAHAHAHAHA...as a fruit shop....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! THAT DOESNT SELL ANY FRUIT!!!!AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Cookie_Monster

The English football team

Piste

Anne Frank's drumkit.

KKkitty

An ashtray on a motorbike

bb1234567

cock flavoured lollipop

power123

a chocolate fireguard

The King of Moo

...nipples on a breastplate.

Laneyh

A chocolate fireguard
An inflatable cheese knife

TheBegotten

Pogo sticks for cripples.
Fireproof coal
A blind photographer

Laneyh

A mint flavoured suppository
Lips on a chicken

Kylo Ren

This thread.

Cookie_Monster

as the "may contain traces of nuts" label on peanuts

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

Keno 92 wrote: »

This thread.

Your contribution to this thread. :rolleyes:

MickeyShtyles

Cigarette lighter on a motorbike

Lighthouse in a bog

mahamageehad

As a chocolate teapot.

As an inflatable dart board.

As a shït flavored lollipop.

charlemont

A wino without a can.

BillyMitchel

Condom machine in the Vatican

Capt'n Midnight

"He wouldn't give you the steam off his píss"

Can you imagine a more useless commodity in a country where evaporation isn't really a problem and there is measurable rain one hour in three. ?

paddy kerins

A marzipan dildo

Sharpshooter

jar_of_coins wrote: »

A one legged man in an arse kicking contest

tits on a bull

an ejector seat onboard a helicopter

Im sure you all get the picture. Anybody heard anymore good ones?

Another boring night in work?

A Chocolate Kettle.

Capt'n Midnight

mahamageehad wrote: »

As a chocolate teapot.

Sharpshooter wrote: »

A Chocolate Kettle.

http://www.thenakedscientists.com/HTML/content/kitchenscience/exp/how-useless-is-a-chocolate-teapot/ The teapot was made by melting down about 1.3kg of chocolate,

Where To

As useless as using similies instead of adjectives.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

Sharpshooter wrote: »

jar_of_coins wrote: »

A one legged man in an arse kicking contest

tits on a bull

an ejector seat onboard a helicopter

Im sure you all get the picture. Anybody heard anymore good ones?

Another boring night in work?

A Chocolate Kettle.

You know it

Capt'n Midnight

MickeyShtyles wrote: »

Lighthouse in a bog

Tourist attraction
http://irishlighthouses.blogspot.ie/2011/06/tower-of-lloyd.html

Isn't this a spectacular lighthouse? This giant Doric column was built in 1791 by skilled masons out of limestone. There's only one problem - its over 25 miles from the sea!

TheBegotten wrote: »

A blind photographer

http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1897093,00.html

It wasn't me! wrote: »

Tits on a fish.

Whales, Dolphins, Manatees :P

Toots

Tits on a bowling ball

Capt'n Midnight

Captain Chaos wrote: »

They exist, the blades fire off before the seat though.

Kamov Ka-50

BTW B52's and the F104 Starfighter have downward firing ejector seats

LH Pathe

anything; to the man with teh skittles touch

Capt'n Midnight

Captain Chaos wrote: »

A c0ck flavoured lollipop.

How do you know that your favourite lollipop isn't ? :eek:

Oranage2

As useless as a hr manager.

IT-Guy

Rubber lips on a woodpecker...

mauzo

Dinosaur repellent.

Capt'n Midnight

syndeyfife wrote: »

Dinosaur repellent.

they are called scarecrows

you can get ultrasonic ones too

EdanHewittt

Jim Corr at a David Icke event

EdanHewittt

... a cold willy
... comic sans on a Hilton menu
... dublin bus when it snows
... first class deck on ryanair
... taxi driver with a CB radio
... 98 FM on christmas morning

retalivity

a poorbox in cavan.

EdanHewittt

... a mobile phone at a meeting
... a two legged table
... gay byrne at a re-union show

EdanHewittt

... oil on an icerink
... a 50 euro note in a recession
... a password with (Only alphanumeric, special character like '*', or '#', and at least one Capital letter)

EdanHewittt

a hilltop goat on a bowling alley

EdanHewittt

a 80:20 ratio of men to women nightclub

EdanHewittt

an echo in a coffin

EdanHewittt

a fart in a hurricane

flanders1979

a pedal powered wheelchair
tits on a nun
wipers on a submarine
Andy Carroll.

Lapin

.....An Ulster Bank account.

retroactive

As useless as Red1z's arsehole.

PeterStrauss The Second

EdanHewittt wrote: »

... a 50 euro note in a recession

If it's useless to you I know a few people that'd take it off your hands