Cultural Differences in the States?

Hells Kitchen

Hey, i'll be moving to Chicago early next year on a fiance visa and i was just wondering what kind of cultural differences you guys experienced when you moved over? I read on another thread that the most important thing when moving is to prepare for the cultural differences and i was trying to figure out what they were and couldn't. I'm not talking about small things like not being able to buy your favourite food and stuff like that but big things that would take time to get used to. Any opinions especially from people who have actually settled there?

Killer Wench

First and foremost, pedestrians have the right of way when crossing at intersections and within designated pedestrian crossings. We also walk slower. When eating out, tipping is expected if you are at a sit-down restaurant and a server has provided service. Standard tipping is 15%. We also tip delivery drivers. Some people tip hair stylists, nail technicians, and just about anyone who is in the service industry.

silja

A lot is regional, and I am not sure on Chicago, only been there on city breaks. For me, the four big things were:
- Car culture. Even if something is in walking distance, people drive. If you are an adult and do not have a drivers license, it is assumed it has been taken away, not that you never had one.
- Gun culture. The amount of people who own guns is staggering, and it is easy to purchase one (depends on state, but usually just 3 day waiting period)/ You'd be surprised at the amount of people who always carry one (concealed carry, so you don't know until the subject comes up).
- Politics. It's odd having only two viable parties here, and the voting system is so different. Also, the place is sooo much more conservative than Europe, even in big cities. In Ireland, I was by far the most conservative of my group of friends. Here, I am considered a bit of a hippy.
- Religion. I doubt this would be the case in Chicago, at least center of the city, but here, everything revolves around churches. They are a main socialising point, people talk about "church family" (friends they made in church), every public event and sports event starts with a prayer, people will say "bless you" or "I will pray for you" all the time.

avalon68

I also find people here quite blunt - they have no problems asking the most personal of questions. I found it very off putting when I arrived here, but have just gotten used to it now. Work hours are much longer than home, and holidays much shorter - generally 10 days a year

CyberJuice

dont throw the C word around, usually i would use it as a descriptive word as in "look at that mad c**t over there" or something along those lines.. swearing is fine (around adults obviously) but it just seems that they will flip out or look at u funny if they hear the c word..

christmas2012

they dont like swearing in offices or that using fvck or anything like that,you say instead of fvcking you say freaking..etc,or damn sugar!

M5

The false greeting you get when you come into any shop wrecks my head!

One place in particular in Phoenix they have 2 people at the entrance to greet you as you come in. Big smiles all round. While your there they have people come up to you and ask if you need help. After that when you go to the checkout the person will ask if you found everything! The hilarious part is that they then search your bag, and check your receipt at the exit.

The absolute falseness is sicking after a while

avalon68

M5 wrote: »

The false greeting you get when you come into any shop wrecks my head!

One place in particular in Phoenix they have 2 people at the entrance to greet you as you come in. Big smiles all round. While your there they have people come up to you and ask if you need help. After that when you go to the checkout the person will ask if you found everything! The hilarious part is that they then search your bag, and check your receipt at the exit.

The absolute falseness is sicking after a while

lol, I cant describe how much this bugs me sometimes! I feel like its an obstacle course - get in, get to item I want, get to register and get out.....bonus points for not making eye contact with any employees! On the flip side if you actually do want help with anything they wont rest until you get sorted - i was buying a camera one day and the guy let me try pretty much every camera in stock....try doing that in Ireland!

InTheTrees

Never ever ever compare the United States with any other country unless its favourably.

InTheTrees

Visitors to the USA complain about the superficial friendliness in shops and restaurants.

But I guess I've been here long enough that I would take it in a heatbeat over the sour faced surliness of irish shop assistants!

:cool:

InTheTrees

The driving is maddening for a petrolhead like myself.

You can get a drivers licence in about 15 minutes in the US, and driving standards reflect this. Its like Bombay but in slow motion. They dont use turn signals, mirrors or any of the rules in their own "Drivers Handbook" because the only thing the cops ever seem to enforce is speeding.

And 1mph over the absurdly low speed limits (usually set artificially low just to generate more fines) and you're likely to be ticketed.

InTheTrees

The Police:

A friend once told me when I first moved here; treat them like a wild alsatian on a leash.

Never NEVER make sudden unpredictable moves. Reaching for ID for instance. (Always carry ID) If you're stopped in your car and your licence is not immediately to hand, explain to the officer that you're reaching for it. "its in the glovebox, officer, I'll get it".

Remember these guys are possibly facing a gun fight and death at every traffic stop they make so they dont appreciate humour, excuses or being a smartass.

And also No Sudden Movements.

Hazys

InTheTrees wrote: »

Visitors to the USA complain about the superficial friendliness in shops and restaurants.

But I guess I've been here long enough that I would take it in a heatbeat over the sour faced surliness of irish shop assistants!

:cool:

Lol completely agree.

A smile (whether real or fake) is waaaay more welcoming than the most real frown. There have been times at home where i felt i was bugging the shop assistant by asking for help.

I always find in bars if its busy, back home a lot of bar tenders would almost throw a beer at you to get you to go away while in the US no matter how busy it gets the bar tenders are 100x more friendlier and willing to chat (even if you dont want them too).

I know they work for tips/commission, but the level of service 100X better than back home.

I think its unfair to say its all fake smiles and politeness from Americans because in general they are more upbeat and enthusastic in life compared to Irish people. A lot of people who work in retail and the service industry have pride in their jobs unlike back home, where a lot of people think that type of work is beneath them.

lil_lisa

To be honest, cultural acceptance is one thing I recognize in this country a lot, and possibly why so many people immigrate here. There are people from all kinds of cultures living together so everyone automatically has this open mindedness when it comes to other cultures. It's not strange to be the only english speaking person at a bar or the only person not using chopsticks at a sushi bar. Maybe that's just Southern California...

FatherTed

It also depends on where you are. I'm in Connecticut and unlike silja who is in Arkansas I think, I don't know anybody who carrys a gun around with them, also religion is much less of a factor here compared to down south with all the bible-belters. Also people in cities like New York do walk and a lot don't even own a car.

Try not to put America down otherwise you'll be branded an outcast. People generally are polite and hard working much more so than the average Irish person.

spideog7

silja wrote: »

Also, the place is sooo much more conservative than Europe, even in big cities. In Ireland, I was by far the most conservative of my group of friends. Here, I am considered a bit of a hippy.

Same as that. Although I find it tends to be very bipolar here, either you're a raging liberal or a raging conservative, there's no real middle ground!

Also it really irks me that every event is an excuse to celebrate the military, they're far worse than the communists!!

Also tend to work too much here, salaries are generally higher but I don't know if it accurately reflects the amount of additional work you have to do, I'd gladly take unpaid leave if it was an option. My workplace is actually quite fun compared to most places, but still no atmosphere compared to home.

Very consumerist society over here, everywhere you go you're bombarded with advertising, I know home is getting like that too but it's much worse here, it's very blatant and people buy into it big time, it's hard not too when it's everywhere.

Hazys

silja wrote: »

A lot is regional, and I am not sure on Chicago, only been there on city breaks. For me, the four big things were:
- Car culture. Even if something is in walking distance, people drive. If you are an adult and do not have a drivers license, it is assumed it has been taken away, not that you never had one.
- Gun culture. The amount of people who own guns is staggering, and it is easy to purchase one (depends on state, but usually just 3 day waiting period)/ You'd be surprised at the amount of people who always carry one (concealed carry, so you don't know until the subject comes up).
- Politics. It's odd having only two viable parties here, and the voting system is so different. Also, the place is sooo much more conservative than Europe, even in big cities. In Ireland, I was by far the most conservative of my group of friends. Here, I am considered a bit of a hippy.
- Religion. I doubt this would be the case in Chicago, at least center of the city, but here, everything revolves around churches. They are a main socialising point, people talk about "church family" (friends they made in church), every public event and sports event starts with a prayer, people will say "bless you" or "I will pray for you" all the time.

Culture in the US varies vastly from region to region. I live in Boston and i've pretty much had the complete opposite experience to Silja.

-Car Culture. I've been living here almost 4 years and i have never been behind the wheel of the car.

-Gun Culture. Gun control is very strict, nobody carries guns.

-Politics. Boston would be mostly democratic. I feel the people here would be more liberal than back home, possibly because of the large student and academic population.

-Religion. Discussion of religion is not very prevalent here. I'd say you'd have more or less the same percentages of religious and atheist people as you would have back home.

PhotogTom

There are lots of regional differences with big cities, particularly on the North, being more liberal than rural areas.
The positive thing I think you'll notice is the "anything is possible" attitude, particularly when it comes to business. Almost everyone will know someone who has "made it" on their own.

dave2pvd

I'm a bit surprised at several of the comments. There are some blanket comparisons made in this thread that are inaccurate. The inaccuracy stems from the reality that the US is far from homogenous (little did I realize this before moving here). Some of the cultural differences between states are as different as what you will find when comparing to Ireland. I actually think it's difficult to find cultural 'norms' that are consistent throughout the US. There are some, but not many.

I see some of you have already pointed this out - especially with respect to religion and politics.

Even within states, the cultural differences are massive. I live in Atlanta. If I drive to middle or south Georgia, I am practically in a different country. The language doesn't even seem to be the same!

So, OP: if you are asking for cultural differences between Ireland and 'The States', I don't think you can be given a straightforward answer. How about you pick a place that you are interested in traveling to and asking for comparisons?

kessler182

The superficial friendliness mentioned in one of the earlier posts is one of the main things that stuck out for me. I hated it at first, wanting to just be left alone and browse in peace, but when you get back here to the bored looking, useless staff you see in 90% of our shops, it's not actually all that bad in comparison.

Gandhi

dave2pvd wrote: »

So, OP: if you are asking for cultural differences between Ireland and 'The States', I don't think you can be given a straightforward answer. How about you pick a place that you are interested in traveling to and asking for comparisons?

He did mention in the first sentence that he is moving to Chicago.

InTheTrees

kessler182 wrote: »

The superficial friendliness mentioned in one of the earlier posts is one of the main things that stuck out for me. I hated it at first, wanting to just be left alone and browse in peace, but when you get back here to the bored looking, useless staff you see in 90% of our shops, it's not actually all that bad in comparison.

+10000000

In ireland we call it "superficial" but americans just call it good service and I tend to agree with them.

InTheTrees

I used to love going to the "full service" pumps at the gas station, you'd get three guys rushing out like a pit crew to your car to fill it, check oil, clean the windscreen etc.

dave2pvd

InTheTrees wrote: »

I used to love going to the "full service" pumps at the gas station, you'd get three guys rushing out like a pit crew to your car to fill it, check oil, clean the windscreen etc.

But you had to pay 1.5X more per gallon.....

The last one near me disappeared ~10yrs ago.

InTheTrees

dave2pvd wrote: »

But you had to pay 1.5X more per gallon.....

It was a couple of cents a gallon I think. Well worth it!

:cool:

There's also still some states where you can't pump your own gas, its illegal. I know about Oregon but i've heard there's some others as well?

EZ24GET

Laws differ from state to state. Some laws may be in effect in one city of the same state and not in another. Culture varies too. In this state you can get a permit to carry a handgun and conceal it. Lots of people here have shot guns or rifles for hunting. Guns are everywhere.

spideog7

InTheTrees wrote: »

dave2pvd wrote: »

But you had to pay 1.5X more per gallon.....

It was a couple of cents a gallon I think. Well worth it!

:cool:

There's also still some states where you can't pump your own gas, its illegal. I know about Oregon but i've heard there's some others as well?

New Jersey is the same, the guy came out to fill mine and I told him I'd do it myself cause I didn't want to pay him but then he pointed to a big sign saying it was state law, just glad I didn't have to tip him!

FGR

Mind my asking what the situation is regarding the drinking culture over there? Or if there is one compared to here.

Hazys

FGR wrote: »

Mind my asking what the situation is regarding the drinking culture over there? Or if there is one compared to here.

Again completely varies from place to place, even neighbouring cities vary vastly.


Salt Lake City...no drinking culture...by law in a bar or a club, you cant hold two alcoholic beverages in your hands at the same time, most bars you have to be a member to drink.

Vegas a couple hours from SLC...you can practically do whatever the hell you want, when you want.


Boston...similar drinking culture as back home...same laws to curtail it, no happy hours and all bars close at 2am.

NYC a couple hours from Boston...tons of happy hours and bars and night clubs stay open till 5am.

silja

I live in a dry county- ie no alcoholic beverages outside private clubs, no wine in shops etc.

Piste

Hazys wrote: »

Again completely varies from place to place, even neighbouring cities vary vastly.


Salt Lake City...no drinking culture...by law in a bar or a club, you cant hold two alcoholic beverages in your hands at the same time, most bars you have to be a member to drink.

I didn't find that in SLC at all, never had any problem ordering in bars, at no point were we asked were we members. The only slight trouble I had was asking for a mojito (they don't seem to do cocktails in SLC, unless you go to a cocktail bar) and once I asked for a double Captain Morgan's and Coke and the waitress just laughed at me and said she could give me two Captain Morgans and Coke but couldn't serve me a double. I was surprised at how easy it was to drink there, I was expecting it to be a lot of hassle.

One culture shock I got was how punctual everyone is (except in Miami, everything runs late in Miami). 10-15 early is considered "on time" over there.

lil_lisa

Don't expect anything to start on time in Southern California. People don't go by the Coordinated Universal Time over here. Most use their own personal clocks and get places when it suits them!

InTheTrees

Yeah I was amazed at how tardy people were in California when I moved there. All those stories about American efficiency etc etc.
Its the same in Washington State as well. Turn up on time to anything and you'll be waiting because everyone else will be late.

:mad:

Palmy

You will meet the nicest and rudest people here.I work for a Large Home Improvement store and one lady refused to get her paint mixed because the Girl in the paint department didn't have a 4yr college degree in PAINT.The same week a lady came in with her 16yr old daughter and pointed out to the same girl in the paint department and said "This is where you will end up working if you don't listen to your teachers at school"straight in front of her.It seems if you don't have a college degree here (In Florida anyway)you are looked down on.Plenty of people working for us have college degrees.I think it is absolutly crazy for someone to spend $70,000+ for a BA degree.Half the staff are crippled with student loans.For god sake it cost $15-20,000 to do a part time associates degree online.
I have had to hold my mouth quite afew times not to say something to certain people that think they are above you, i fell like saying who the f do you think you are.

Killer Wench

InTheTrees wrote: »

Yeah I was amazed at how tardy people were in California when I moved there. All those stories about American efficiency etc etc.
Its the same in Washington State as well. Turn up on time to anything and you'll be waiting because everyone else will be late.

:mad:

It's interesting because I experienced that when I lived in Ireland. Don't get me started on morning tea breaks.

Killer Wench

Palmy wrote: »

You will meet the nicest and rudest people here.I work for a Large Home Improvement store and one lady refused to get her paint mixed because the Girl in the paint department didn't have a 4yr college degree in PAINT.The same week a lady came in with her 16yr old daughter and pointed out to the same girl in the paint department and said "This is where you will end up working if you don't listen to your teachers at school"straight in front of her.It seems if you don't have a college degree here (In Florida anyway)you are looked down on.Plenty of people working for us have college degrees.I think it is absolutly crazy for someone to spend $70,000+ for a BA degree.Half the staff are crippled with student loans.For god sake it cost $15-20,000 to do a part time associates degree online.
I have had to hold my mouth quite afew times not to say something to certain people that think they are above you, i fell like saying who the f do you think you are.

I think only 25% of the American people have a college degree or something like that. It is ridiculous that there are elitists out there that won't interact with people less educated, and it is equally ridiculous the amount our college education costs. It was cheaper for me to move to Ireland and attend TCD for a Master's degree than it would have been to pay out of state tuition at the University of Washington. Yet, I tend to be a bit cold-hearted when it comes to those who seek online degrees without doing proper research on those type of schools.

InTheTrees

Killer Wench wrote: »

It's interesting because I experienced that when I lived in Ireland. Don't get me started on morning tea breaks.

ha ha ha!

I think one of the primary reasons people leave Ireland is that they feel they can get things done elsewhere!

Its like half the people get it (and a lot of them leave) and the other half blissfully continue with that "unique" sense of time that tourists love so much.

My sister in Galway for instance... Time? Schedules? Appointments? They're just rough guides about when to give something a little thought...

Admittedly a little worse than California. It wouldnt do to turn up to a meeting in silicon valley a day late.

Palmy

It really is crazy the price of college education here.I watched an ad on t.v for a mechnic school for a full one year pre trade course.I looked it up online and they want $40,000 for the course and your not even qualified at the end of it.Same goes for the hospitals here,a girl in works daughter was very sick and in hospital for a month.Her insurance covers 80% but the final bill was just over $1mil...:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

dave2pvd

Palmy wrote: »

Same goes for the hospitals here,a girl in works daughter was very sick and in hospital for a month.Her insurance covers 80% but the final bill was just over $1mil...:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

Sounds like a terrible insurance policy. Usually there are 'out of pocket maximums' that cap how much you pay. Without that in there, you're in deep trouble.

Keep in mind that the 'costs' you hear are like 'MSRP' or 'list' prices. Insurance companies do not pay these amounts when settling. 25c on the dollar is more typical.

I had a fairly big bill from an injury recently that required physical therapy sessions beyond what insurance would pay (I was capped at 20 sessions). I ended up settling with the clinic for what the insurance company would have paid. I think it was ~22% of the bill.

Palmy

Her plan was $750 deductable insurance through working for a major Home Improvement chain.Her daughter also required 60 physio seasons(20 covered by insuranse) at $1200 a day.Her own expenses not covered by insurance is well into the hundreds of thousands.People are even ringing her in work looking for money and shes only back a week..Good luck i say.I told her pay them a hundred bucks a month thats all you can afford to pay them..:D
Florida is $500 to call an ambulance and $750 at a+e before they even look at you.

dave2pvd

Palmy wrote: »

Her plan was $750 deductable insurance through working for a major Home Improvement chain.Her daughter also required 60 physio seasons(20 covered by insuranse) at $1200 a day.Her own expenses not covered by insurance is well into the hundreds of thousands.People are even ringing her in work looking for money and shes only back a week..Good luck i say.I told her pay them a hundred bucks a month thats all you can afford to pay them..:D
Florida is $500 to call an ambulance and $750 at a+e before they even look at you.

Again, all 'list prices' and extremely negotiable. Especially that $1200/day - in fact that doesn't sound right at all.

Palmy

She had water on the brain so i think thats why it was so expensive for the type of physio.She was in ICU for over three weeks.I know if i was paying id do what you did and offer them a reducted amount for sure:o

DesperateDan

This is actually one of the main things that would put me off moving to the US, insane and terrifying medical care costs. I haven't been to the dentist in 10 years and thats only a couple hundred depending on what's needed!

looksee

My daughter has been in the US for the last 6 years or so, and goes to the dentist when she comes home!

dave2pvd

I've got great dental insurance.

I never go.

I saw Marathon Man :eek:

Palmy

If you don't have insurance here they still have to treat you by law.They will just take you to court and you will just have to pay a certain amount that the judge thinks you can afford.I don't have insurance at the moment even though i could get a reduced rate through work.Still it would cost me $300 a month.Personelly i would rather put $3600 a year away in a rainy day account and hope to never us it.After three years thats over ten grand saved.I am in my mid thirty's with a wife and one child,as the other poster said you can bargain them down to about 25% of the cost if you have cash and settle.We have people at work who are 70 yrs old and the only reason for working is because they can get a massive reduced insurance rate.Once you get older in life they sky rocket your insurance payments anyway....It's just a big scam really.
I was at a friend of a friends house a few weeks back who was a doctor and he wasn't much older than me and his house was worth about $1.5mil on the water, brand new Porche 911 turbo in the garage ,5 series Bmw and a Range rover.Now i give it to him and doctors train hard and i don't hold it against him but when it cost $15-20k to have a baby here it's nuts how much they charge. You can drive past the doctors office's here and see Porches and Ferrari's parked next to each other..

dave2pvd

Palmy wrote: »

If you don't have insurance here they still have to treat you by law.They will just take you to court and you will just have to pay a certain amount that the judge thinks you can afford.I don't have insurance at the moment even though i could get a reduced rate through work.Still it would cost me $300 a month.Personelly i would rather put $3600 a year away in a rainy day account and hope to never us it.After three years thats over ten grand saved.I am in my mid thirty's with a wife and one child,as the other poster said you can bargain them down to about 25% of the cost if you have cash and settle.We have people at work who are 70 yrs old and the only reason for working is because they can get a massive reduced insurance rate.Once you get older in life they sky rocket your insurance payments anyway....It's just a big scam really.
I was at a friend of a friends house a few weeks back who was a doctor and he wasn't much older than me and his house was worth about $1.5mil on the water, brand new Porche 911 turbo in the garage ,5 series Bmw and a Range rover.Now i give it to him and doctors train hard and i don't hold it against him but when it cost $15-20k to have a baby here it's nuts how much they charge. You can drive past the doctors office's here and see Porches and Ferrari's parked next to each other..

You might want to think about taking out a low cost high deductible health plan policy. Or just take that $3,600pa and opt in to your employer's plan (sounds like an OK deal). Think about it, one ER visit for a broken bone (God forbid) and you've blown far past the $3,600. You're taking a big risk there, IMO.

Something to keep in mind: many docs make very little. Think of ER docs in regional clinics or attendings in AIDS clinics. Docs that carry out 'procedures' tend to make the big bucks (neuro, orth, plastic surgery...).

The profit taking in healthcare is in the phara/med device industry. Also, in the health insurance 'layer' of profit taking.



....have we gone off-topic a bit?

Palmy

Touch wood never broken a bone in my body and played Rugby for 14 years..:D ...yeah i think we are a little off topic..:P:)

RGM

Just to echo something said earlier, the cultural differences just within the US itself are vast. Keep in mind that there are about 40 states larger than the whole of Ireland. Think of the differences between the different regions of Ireland, and then realize the US is well over 100x as big.

You can't really generalize about the whole country.

HavingCrack

Apologies if this has been mentioned, haven't read the whole thread but never, never, never use the c word, in San Francisco anyway. Every other swear word is acceptable but one of my Irish friends used that in a drunken conversation one day on a bus home and the whole bus literally went silent.

The other thing, which is a very California specific thing, maybe even San Francisco specific thing is the obsession with healthy, organic food which is absurdly expensive which means you end up paying ridiculous amounts of money doing your grocery shopping or else eating fast food.

Oh and buying good ham is impossible.

[-0-]

This thread is great.

A few points to note:
Each state is like it's own country, so if someone has a bad thing to say or a bad experience, they must realize it's not like that everywhere. Likewise with good experiences.

I live in Nashua, New Hampshire which is about 39 miles from Boston.

Pros
1. The quality of living is in a different league to back home. This is due to a million and one reasons. Weather, facilities, etc.
2. The weather is great! We actually have 4 seasons in New England, although too much snow will make you crazy.
3. If you have health insurance then the service you get is outstanding. I've had several procedures done since I got here, the hospitals were like 5 star hotels. Obviously not like this everywhere & if you don't have insurance.
4. The Americans love the Irish accent - especially the women.
5. The Americans are a friendly bunch all round.
6. No tax on income in NH. My salary is probably double what I got in Ireland doing the exact same thing and I pay LESS tax than I did there. Granted property tax is high in NH to compensate but I don't have a house yet so that does not bother me for now.
7. Land is cheap depending on where you are. You can buy a 30 acre farm and build a house on it in Tennessee for 100 grand or even less.

Cons
1. The drivers are terrible. If you're not going 10 miles OVER the speed limit people will beep at you to go faster. Very aggressive drivers, often run red lights. Bad driving can be seen everywhere, they constantly speed up & break, speed up & break instead of going the one pace.
2. Good Guinness is hard to find; unsurprising - it is America. I've seen it all - 1 pint pour to 7 pint pour. One guy tried to sell me a pint with a inch of blank and the rest was head. In saying that, there is a few nice places in Boston with perfect Guinness, same goes for two places in Nashua - you just have to catch the right fella / girl behind the bar at the time.
3. The food is too nice. Why the hell should this be a con? Well, if you eat out you're going to get fat, fast. The portions are huge and really bad for you. On the plus side, I would rather have this than have crap food, but it's why people are so heavy here.
4. Fast food joints everywhere!
5. Adverts on the TV every 5 mins or so. Adverts in general are crazy here. We have Bloomberg on in work all day and the amount of viagra adverts is insane. I use a Roku 2XS at home so I don't have to watch adverts at home.
6. Bible bashing baptists are insane. I went to a Baptist church once to experience it; the pastor was telling how people used to murder innocent children who misbehaved. Mounds of thousands of burning kids could be seen for miles around. I saw kids there looking at each other scared to death. Terrible stuff.