Poetry Megathread

Crann na Beatha

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pickarooney

Two threads but no poems. This is the Creative Writing forum where anyone can post poems and specify if they want feedback or not.
What are you waiting for exactly?

Crann na Beatha

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Crann na Beatha

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supp

nice

crazyhorsecowle

A Bitch and It's world.

I hail from nothing and I've nothing to give,
I hail from nothing and in nothing I live,
I hail for forgiveness and I have broken your heart,
I hail from a love lost, it was lost from the start.

I was bred from a madness in conclusion a sadness,
an every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

Society's just broken down
And all it's walls come tumbling down,
And the Heaven's Lord's have closed their gates,
And cooperate to coordinate on how to seal our fate,
Like a delegation of politicians who must decree our faith.

To you I'll stick my finger up
And give to you this hollow cup,
And toast to your brilliance, your throne and your crown,
With your ever present vultures that strip us and rape us,
Only death can now save us,
And deliver us down.

I was bred from a madness, in conclusion a sadness,
An every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

Enable hope to take first place,
Amongst this deluded degenerate race,
But pity us not, for here pity's lost,
Like a flower in December, fallen victim to frost.

Insect Overlord

Here's one that seems to be picking up a few views in the ol' poetry blog.

Closing Time

The nightclub undimmed all its lights
At half past two and sent us packing,
Allowing only time to search for coats
And exclamations of another job well done;
Another personal best for which prevention,
The next step, would out-weigh cure.

Then eight diverged to five and three
Outside the shining kebab shop door,
Allowing time for smiles, mischievous grins
And exclamations from a Donor-virgin’s lips;
Add a new favourite to the menu list!
Then back outside into the rain

To search after the other five
And make up eight for the wet walk home.

golden lane

ah!, such is life, the man declared
so much around, but nothing shared
can we not hold out our hand
and share with all, from this green land

why people have, more than their shares
and those without, with forlorn stares
why one can have more, than their fill
then leave to others, in their will

is today, not hungers need
is life much better, filled with greed
and one day will those not repent
what's on this earth, is heaven sent

crazyhorsecowle

Why a bed is more than just somewhere you sleep....

You are mostly conceived in a bed

You give birth in a bed

You dream in your sleep and HEY PRESTO!!!
You sleep in your bed.

You make love in a bed (hopefully often!!)

Your bed is what holds you when you are sick
And releases you when you are well,

And when you die
You hopefully by the grace of God
Die peacefully in your bed.

So enjoy your bed!

Written whilst sitting on my bed! Hee Hee!!!

Whelpling

Insect Overlord wrote: »

Here's one that seems to be picking up a few views in the ol' poetry blog.

Closing Time

The nightclub undimmed all its lights
At half past two and sent us packing,
Allowing only time to search for coats
And exclamations of another job well done;
Another personal best for which prevention,
The next step, would out-weigh cure.

Then eight diverged to five and three
Outside the shining kebab shop door,
Allowing time for smiles, mischievous grins
And exclamations from a Donor-virgin’s lips;
Add a new favourite to the menu list!
Then back outside into the rain

To search after the other five
And make up eight for the wet walk home.

Love this.

I think it's 'Doner' - but that's pretty irrelevant. Still love it.

tubby trucker

Mindless Minds,
Mind Moronic Morons,
Minding Mindless Minds.

insight_man

Aquila wrote: »

Tempest

A whirlpool of deceit:a never-ending cycle ensues
Hidden storms over calm waters
Nothing is, as it seems
Streams of negativity flow
Into waters ill at ease

Hidden feelings reappearing
The eye of the inner tempest shearing,
Lone gone the coat of love
Bare and naked fearing

Torrid winds roar, cruel waves bash against the shore
Eroding ones soul further into obscurity
Darkness falls over troubled waters
The mournful hymn of the soulless
Could be heard all round
In this boundless sea of turmoil.

Very good. I read into it that this comes from some personal experience. Not prying but most good poetry comes from our life experiences.

Any suggestions,critique most welcome

Very good. I think it comes from personal experience. Not prying, but most good poetry comes from personal experience

insight_man

crazyhorsecowle wrote: »

A Bitch and It's world.

I hail from nothing and I've nothing to give,
I hail from nothing and in nothing I live,
I hail for forgiveness and I have broken your heart,
I hail from a love lost, it was lost from the start.

I was bred from a madness in conclusion a sadness,
an every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

Society's just broken down
And all it's walls come tumbling down,
And the Heaven's Lord's have closed their gates,
And cooperate to coordinate on how to seal our fate,
Like a delegation of politicians who must decree our faith.

To you I'll stick my finger up
And give to you this hollow cup,
And toast to your brilliance, your throne and your crown,
With your ever present vultures that strip us and rape us,
Only death can now save us,
And deliver us down.

I was bred from a madness, in conclusion a sadness,
An every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

Enable hope to take first place,
Amongst this deluded degenerate race,
But pity us not, for here pity's lost,
Like a flower in December, fallen victim to frost.

Very dark work. Fatalistic even. Good play with words and well written.

insight_man

golden lane wrote: »

ah!, such is life, the man declared
so much around, but nothing shared
can we not hold out our hand
and share with all, from this green land

why people have, more than their shares
and those without, with forlorn stares
why one can have more, than their fill
then leave to others, in their will

is today, not hungers need
is life much better, filled with greed
and one day will those not repent
what's on this earth, is heaven sent

Really like this!

crazyhorsecowle

insight_man wrote: »

Very dark work. Fatalistic even. Good play with words and well written.

Thank you so much for your comment,it means a lot.
Thank you also for the new word fatalistic.I looked it up,very interesting.

I never have an idea before I write,it usually stems from a word or feeling or tune that gives me a rhythm for the way the words progress.
I am sometimes surprised myself of the way they map out and the places and feelings I transport myself to whilst writing.


This is my first time ever putting up my words for people to see in a specific place designated to writing,so I was very nervous in doing so.
I don't mind whether people like or dislike it but at least by putting it up it gives people the chance to find out.

I love reading peoples words ,and wish there were more to read on this creative writing section.

Thanks again and I hope to get the opportunity to speak with you again.
Fatalistic.....love it.

insight_man

crazyhorsecowle wrote: »

Thank you so much for your comment,it means a lot.
Thank you also for the new word fatalistic.I looked it up,very interesting.

I never have an idea before I write,it usually stems from a word or feeling or tune that gives me a rhythm for the way the words progress.
I am sometimes surprised myself of the way they map out and the places and feelings I transport myself to whilst writing.


This is my first time ever putting up my words for people to see in a specific place designated to writing,so I was very nervous in doing so.
I don't mind whether people like or dislike it but at least by putting it up it gives people the chance to find out.

I love reading peoples words ,and wish there were more to read on this creative writing section.

Thanks again and I hope to get the opportunity to speak with you again.
Fatalistic.....love it.

Like you I love words. Used in the right way they can make us laugh, cry and tug at our heart strings, cause anger and conflict. Very powerful really. If you have other pieces of work you want to share I'd love to read them.

crazyhorsecowle

insight_man wrote: »

Like you I love words. Used in the right way they can make us laugh, cry and tug at our heart strings, cause anger and conflict. Very powerful really. If you have other pieces of work you want to share I'd love to read them.

Cheers,I will do and likewise if you have also.
I don't write as often as I used, or would like to.

I would absolutely love to do spoken word,I have it all in my head and is unlike anything I write, but I need to translate it to paper and then into physical emotion which should be an interesting experience!!!
Then of course I have to find the balls to actually do it,the rest is easy in comparison to getting up and doing it.

Ah maybe next week!!!
Keep in touch and Thanks a million.

crazyhorsecowle

Hail and thunder,
snow and ice
began to whither
our paradise.

No yeast to harvest
no bread to turn
few are the forests
and no fires burn.

Food so scarce
lengths well over run
cattle all starve
no milk to churn.

"Plague is upon us"
The people now cry.
"If god cannot save us
Why even try".

Children unhappy
no smiles can they keep
nothing but hunger
to lull them to sleep.

"Why has this happened
what have we done?
Deliver us from evil
thy will be done.

There goes my family
I wave them goodbye,
they have plenty of company
on the cart where they lye.

I know I'm not far behind you
but carry on,
try as I must,

Ashes to Ashes,
Dust to Dust.

crazyhorsecowle

I fell asleep in a sea of dreams surrounded
by verse,
Crumpled up I lay with ease.

Shut your eyes it takes time to rest and unwind.

There's no need to worry,
Your o.k.

Relax ,deep breaths.

Maybe you should lye down your looking a little peakish,
Your starting to get very pale.

You alright?
take a seat,
deep breaths.

"BYE,BYE"
I'll just drop and lye....
for a moment.

I'm gone,
far from the ground I lay upon
and deep beneath the atmosphere,

CHAOS.

I pay no heed as I lay here unconscious.

"WAKE UP"
"WAKE UP"

AND BREATH.

Insect Overlord

Some Day We Have To Share This Sight Together

You cannot walk these roads with me tonight,
And tomorrow morning feels too far away,
And so, instead, I force my hands to write
A pale impression of the Milky Way.

Every star that can be viewed by mortal sight
Carries over Moher’s cliffs and waves
A lonely message that I hope just might
Redeem my absence over summer days.

And if a man had wings to give him flight
I’d take a leap from castle walls to say
That Heaven’s quilt of jewels holds no light
To match the diamonds in your smiling face.

I promise that this sight we’ll one day share
As an embracing, starlight-gazing pair.

crazyhorsecowle

Insect Overlord wrote: »

Some Day We Have To Share This Sight Together

You cannot walk these roads with me tonight,
And tomorrow morning feels too far away,
And so, instead, I force my hands to write
A pale impression of the Milky Way.

Holy ****,did you write that? all of it I mean?

Now that is impressive,very rare occasion indeed,
stunning.
Thank you so much for sharing whether yours or not.
I felt it as I read it.
Nice one.
Think I'll read it again.......and again.

Insect Overlord

crazyhorsecowle wrote: »

Holy ****,did you write that? all of it I mean?

Now that is impressive,very rare occasion indeed,
stunning.
Thank you so much for sharing whether yours or not.
I felt it as I read it.
Nice one.
Think I'll read it again.......and again.

Thanks!

Yup, that's all my own work. Written while exiled in the Arann Islands a few years ago.

golden lane

Insect Overlord wrote: »

Thanks!

Yup, that's all my own work. Written while exiled in the Arann Islands a few years ago.

time not wasted then.......

Insect Overlord

golden lane wrote: »

time not wasted then.......

Not entirely anyway. It's funny what ideas can come to you on the way home after supervising a céilí. :pac:

DaneScott

Filleted a moth this evening.

Horrific really. Poor thing still breathing.

Still though, a curiosity had besieged me, on seeing

Another being, protruding from a crude opening

Below its torso, while poking it under scope.

I was hoping to get a closer look,

To understand what was unfolding.



What it took, was to lightly trim

Off the limbs. Whittle away the wings.

Other such deplorable things.

The precision needed to succeed in

Removing the unwanted pieces,

Attempting to reveal its species,

Left no room to consider the moths feelings.

I crushed its head with a tweezers.



Most likely a parasitic creature.

I took pictures. Spent hours observing its features.

With no success, My mind digressed,

I began thinking of sleeping.



I decided to keep it.

To see if tomorrow we could tease it

Into another suitor.

Though only to explore its nature.

I swear, never for pleasure.



But it died. I knew it would.

And all night, I dreamt moths ruled the world.

How about this?
I really liked Closing Time. Reads nice.

crazyhorsecowle

DaneScott wrote: »

Filleted a moth this evening.

Horrific really. Poor thing still breathing.

Still though, a curiosity had besieged me, on seeing

Another being, protruding from a crude opening

Below its torso, while poking it under scope.

I was hoping to get a closer look,

To understand what was unfolding.

Hee Hee!!!

Class, well done. the imagination and words combined,a powerful combination.
Fair play for posting.
I'D LOVE TO HEAR MORE.Cheers pal.

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

crazyhorsecowle

Aquila wrote: »

Love?

The funny thing is that I will never know how it reads in your head or sound ,but I have found a lovely broken rhythm in speaking it out in mine.
I really enjoyed it ,thanks.

I have a couple of lines that I thought of a long time ago and had always planned on basing a poem around them,

( it's dark in here,
too dark to see how dark it really is)

Reading your poem reminded me I had yet to do it,so thanks for bringing it back!!!
Be great to hear more.
Thanks.

PurpleBee

DaneScott wrote: »

Filleted a moth this evening.

Incredibly good first line.

pickarooney

DaneScott wrote: »

Filleted a moth this evening.

Horrific really. Poor thing still breathing.

Cracking poem. I loved the meter and the content.

DaneScott

Seriously, some of the more encouraging things I've ever heard. Thanks guys. I'll fall asleep smiling tonight. It actually means a lot.

crazyhorsecowle

Deservingly so danescot,
It's brilliant,I though I had commented on it but seemed to have missed it.
Well done and any more to share would be greatly welcomed.
TAKE A BOW,
you deserve it.

DaneScott

Jaysis man, thank you. I've never blushed before my laptop til now.
Here's another one sure:

All these surreptitious suppositions of splitting oceans,

Prose so powerful it can burst notions wide open -

These have been exposed as taciturn Trojans.

Simply your mind corroding.



The practice of doubting theologians,

Laying opinions out in the open,

Shows no more hope than

Doping and de - robing the pope, and

Pinning him to a post

For roasting and disposing.



Your salvation will not be found in revolting,

Ratifying pieties or effacing earthly vanities.

These pawns are preceded by supernatural beings,

Superseded by sacrosanct sacraments

That offer sanctuary to sanctity,

Align your efforts with ignominy

And you with heresy.



It would be best to surrender immediately.

golden lane

well i hope the gates are open
and the hinges are well oiled
because at last, the world has noticed
and your plan's now surely foiled

of course, you thought you were expected
and to heaven, that is so
but, you told the little children
if they told, to hell they'd go

well one day the gates, will open
but, there will be no saintly spires
for your crimes, the lord will damn you
to eternity, in hell's fires

PurpleBee

Maybe it's just me but a lot of the poetry posted on creative writing seems to be a little too abstract, I mean the imagery is purely metaphorical and hard to grasp as a result.

That's why I thought Danescott's moth poem was so refreshing. I mean the depth is there but the poem also functioned simply as a description of someone dismembering a moth.

Maybe I'm just criticising poetry for trying to be too poetic.

pickarooney

PurpleBee wrote: »

Maybe it's just me but a lot of the poetry posted on creative writing seems to be a little too abstract, I mean the imagery is purely metaphorical and hard to grasp as a result.

That's why I thought Danescott's moth poem was so refreshing. I mean the depth is there but the poem also functioned simply as a description of someone dismembering a moth.

Maybe I'm just criticising poetry for trying to be too poetic.

I get that impression a lot. I never know whether it's being subtle and me obtuse or if the author is deliberately holding back from saying anything of substance.

golden lane

PurpleBee wrote: »

Maybe it's just me but a lot of the poetry posted on creative writing seems to be a little too abstract, I mean the imagery is purely metaphorical and hard to grasp as a result.

That's why I thought Danescott's moth poem was so refreshing. I mean the depth is there but the poem also functioned simply as a description of someone dismembering a moth.

Maybe I'm just criticising poetry for trying to be too poetic.

maybe just a line or two
an ode, so to speak
i thought it was a cabbage
but it does, look like a leek

device, for automotive transport
or a thing that opens cans
when the scots have all the same name
they're not family, they're just clans

now i know these words are rubbish
and superficial, one might say
but they may just bring a smile or two
and i hope, brighten up your day

DaneScott

golden lane wrote: »

maybe just a line or two
an ode, so to speak
i thought it was a cabbage
but it does, look like a leek

device, for automotive transport
or a thing that opens cans
when the scots have all the same name
they're not family, they're just clans

now i know these words are rubbish
and superficial, one might say
but they may just bring a smile or two
and i hope, brighten up your day

Pleasant

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

First poem I've written in a long long time...

I leave awkwardly each morning,
No kiss goodbye, no parting embrace,
Guilt overcoming my animal instincts,
A longing glance upon your face.

I never wanted to hurt you or lead you astray,
No malice in my intentions, despite the pain I've brought,
I tell myself I should stop, that I'll only hurt you again,
But lust always sweeps away such thoughts.

I am not wicked-minded, my hearts not made of stone,
Yet I could avoid such heartbreak and I simply won't,
Once more you'll cry and I'll walk away coldly,
Because you want me to love you and I don't.

DaneScott

Duffy the Vampire Slayer wrote: »

First poem I've written in a long long time...

I leave awkwardly each morning,
No kiss goodbye, no parting embrace,
Guilt overcoming my animal instincts,
A longing glance upon your face.

I never wanted to hurt you or lead you astray,
No malice in my intentions, despite the pain I've brought,
I tell myself I should stop, that I'll only hurt you again,
But lust always sweeps away such thoughts.

I am not wicked-minded, my hearts not made of stone,
Yet I could avoid such heartbreak and I simply won't,
Once more you'll cry and I'll walk away coldly,
Because you want me to love you and I don't.

Lovely. I like it anyway.

golden lane

Duffy the Vampire Slayer wrote: »

First poem I've written in a long long time...

I leave awkwardly each morning,
No kiss goodbye, no parting embrace,
Guilt overcoming my animal instincts,
A longing glance upon your face.

I never wanted to hurt you or lead you astray,
No malice in my intentions, despite the pain I've brought,
I tell myself I should stop, that I'll only hurt you again,
But lust always sweeps away such thoughts.

I am not wicked-minded, my hearts not made of stone,
Yet I could avoid such heartbreak and I simply won't,
Once more you'll cry and I'll walk away coldly,
Because you want me to love you and I don't.

.

very true.....great words...

Insect Overlord

Best Wishes

If one, by chance, should come to read
Some sample of my poetry,
I wish that there-in they will find
The work of a creative mind.

I wish to them that it be known,
Whether through image, sound or tone,
That I have always sought out new
Vehicles for my point of view.

I do not seek celebrity;
Just that these scribbles may be seen
And valued by a friendly eye
That finds wherein these words truths lie.

pickarooney

Blog-pimping in rhyming form. Got to hand it to you

Insect Overlord

pickarooney wrote: »

Blog-pimping in rhyming form. Got to hand it to you

The poem's about three years old, but I'm enjoying the extra mileage I'm getting from it this week. :pac: I should be ready to unleash the newer stuff from Write Club over the next few months.

golden lane

great stuff io.....

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

They lie empty for much of the year,
But not yet abandoned,
Curious practices remain, tribal rituals persevere
Clung to in hope of something more,
Or in the face of our oldest fear,
Yet in Mays spate of first communions,
This spiritual remnant takes material forms,
A gilded display of hollow indulgence,
A bag of silver above the crown of thorns,
As few of the tribe now follow its creed
For good or for bad, they reject its demands,
Clinging to spiritual opiate they need,
The moral dictates of bishops,
Ignored in a society half-free,

Yet the tribe clings to its rituals,
A national legacy stubbornly defended,
Amidst the wrapping into Britain’s fold,
Religion and race linked tightly together,
The green, white and orange with the white and gold,
The way things are done, the way its always been,
A tribe in the grip of conformity’s hold,
Unlike those before me I can choose to dissent,
Exiled in spirit, but in body I remain,
And when I walk by churches
Or by the headstones grey,
I feel as though I trespass,
On the ancient tribes domain.

Stompbox

Here's a poem I wrote a year or two ago; I think I posted it in a thread before but there were no replies.

KNOWING --

Folded in darkness but content, still,
Collecting the pervasive perspective, and learning all the while,
Learning the myth, its way, and what it has done to you.
The fold, woven like a lucid snare, redefining escape as routine.
Trying to press between the inner sides, tight, yet done still.
Muscles shift; coast, reminding you to revise your presence
And consider, if the moment can find itself, why the fire inside your walls
could not ignite your heart. And the moment shuddered, the flame made frail,
but never quite enwrapped, also pressing a punishing rot.
Slowly, the sides found substance, raising foam,
Arresting your fingers, shoulders too, knotted together as time seemed less familiar.
Floating, and knowing that it could be enough.

DaneScott

You breach my walls.
Truly, no one else does.
You've beheld my entirety.
No one else could.
Your fairness of complexion
Demands an ovation - a rise,
A fever of mind, an expulsion of time.
With a parlance echoing all arguments for love,
All the pleasantries well versed,
All the beauty of the world.

Gravity is a force which you pull.
The universe, it's meaning,
Is bowing to the feeling to submit my being
To your subtleties, surrendering everything.

You are what it is to be.
You know and own the whole of me.

DaneScott

Never ever have I wrote for you.
I could try explain why, but I
Don't fully know the reasons.
Certainly, it's not a shortage of feelings.
Maybe it's because I wrote before for another,
Only for it to cause bother.
Too much time invested in a lover.
Behooving I to never articulate
Myself in such a way, again.

A fear, maybe, of repulsion.
Love misconstrued as obsession
Deterring another suitor.
Getting too heavy, needing someone so much
That I crush the future.
Fervour forbidding touch.
I've already been thought that lesson.
A great deal of my time
Given to deconstructing my mind.
All in the name of love,
In spite of what really was.
So I'm unnecessarily cautious, of course.

Nothing though, equals the sum of you now.
No sequence of symbols for sounds
Can explain just how I feel about you.
Without you.
It's complicated, like all relations.
It's wanting to brave this, better it,
That is a true indication of my love.
A fair representation of us.
Not just simple words.

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

You left me abandoned,
On a rocky shore,
Cast away from all I knew,
As you arrived in a safe harbour,
I contemplated my chances,
How could I survive here?
Why would I want to?

As years passed,
My survival became certain,
But loneliness lingered on that barren isle,
As I wished it to
Forsaking all rescuers
All those who could help,
For what use were they
If they weren’t you?

When at last you rescued me,
From that solitary shore,
No jubilant return lay in store,
You were my sole motivation,
My reason to exist,
But while I confined myself to waiting,
You had carried on living,
You had sought so much more,

Though abandoned once more,
I hung on and remained,
Never again to be cast away,
But now my sailing is solitary
As I adventure alone,
Fearing that others will also stray.

howardmarks

I say goodbye, This one last time
A happy troubled smile

About to exit those one way doors
I stop with sudden panic
Glancing back with uncertainty I wonder
Have I made a mistake?

I push on through quickly now
The familiar sound behind me
I'm outside now the grass is green here
Not quite as green as back through those doors



I don't know what a poem is people. Always disliked poetry in school as I felt it was forced upon us. People tastes are different etc.
Anyway I had a thought and wrote it down.