Dealing with a "GET YOUR DOG AWAY FROM MY CHILD!" *Read post #117*

deandean

So every day I walk my kids to school, I bring the dog too.

I meet a woman coming the other way. She has two kids, one aged about 5 (going to school) who doesn't seem too bothered, and one kid aged about 3.

About three times her mum has really lashed into me, 'Keep your dog away from my children' - serious stuff. I end up walking out onto the road with my dog and kids.

Now my dog is well socialised, he would offer the paw to a stranger.

The problem I see here is the mother - she freaks out rightaway, and as a consequence her kids get frightened. I have thought of saying to her - come here, let your kid say hello to my dog & pat him etc, but the meetings are too nasty for this.

So at the moment I see her coming and I go onto the road with my dog & kids and let her & her kids walk along the footpath while she gives me a dirty look - it is just a bit unfair to my side!

The woman, it seems to me, has an irrational problem with dogs and whatever about her I am sad to see she is passing this onto her kids.

Anyone been in this situation before? Ideally I'd like to share the footpath.

Thanks,
Dean

borderlinemeath

Once your dog is under your control she can't do anything.

Some people are just scared of dogs and that's just it, but I do think it's wrong that she is passing this fear onto her children.

You shouldn't have to go out onto the road and to be honest if this woman is the one with the issue then she should be crossing to the other side of the road out of your way rather than you having to accomodate her.

wonderfulname

Stop her and talk to her, it's absurd that she would force your children onto a road before letting her own walk past a dog at the hand of it's owner. Do explain that your dog is well trained and well socialised, ask her to pet him, not the kids, she's the one with the problem.

DamagedTrax

assuming you have control of your dog just walk straight past her. dont even acknowledge her and certainly do not get out of her way. silly bint.

doctor evil

I'm just wondering is the dog on a lead? She could be dealing with a very real phobia along with the added stress of getting young children to school on time. Not fair at all to refer to her as a silly bint.

I don't know if I would engage with her, I certainly wouldn't ask her or her kids to pet the dog. Not the time or place to tackle a serious phobia. For an easier life (and for the kids) would it not be easier to walk on the opposite footpath.

Do you mind me asking what kind of dog it is.

fenris

I woudn't even engage with her beyond the barest necessity. Some people are just drama queens and need to get over themselves or pay someone to help them do so.

Anything you do or say will most likely be deliberately misconstrued at a high volume with added hysteria for effect then greatly exagerated over coffee with her pals.

I wouldn't let her force you onto the other side of the road, it is a public place and not her sitting room, just smile and walk past without fuss and continue your day.

evolving_doors

Does your dog lick his own bo**ox ?
If so does he mouthrinse afterwards ?
Does he want to lick the kids face/hand ?

Yummy!!!

Not..

wexie

Been there and done that. I've had people dragging their kids away from an 8 week old Shihtzuh and our other pup (newfoundland) which I could nearly understand.

Some people have obviously had negative experiences with dog and seem hellbent to pass these onto their kids.

Personally I think it's awful that people would willingly and knowingly take away the great pleasure and love that dogs have to give from their kids and I firmly believe every kid should be given the chance to grow up with dogs, or at least be given a decent chance to not grow up being afraid of dogs.

However, if that lady is already responding to you and your dog who (I assume) obviously gets on with your kids and is well socialised I think she's well beyond the point of having a rational grownup conversation about dogs with.

If it was me I'd make it a point to make sure she understands I have every right to be on the footpath and if she doesn't like it she can bl**dy well cross the road herself. (but I'm an awkward f*cker sometimes).

Either way I think you can probably just save yourself the heartache and just ignore her. Feel sorry for the kids though.

Few things can make kids laugh like messing around with a dog. My eldest learned to walk holding on to our giant big black slobbery newfy and loved her to bits.

Bobby Baccala

Came across one of these the other day, brought my dogs down to the beach and there was some beach clean goin on.
Had my 5 month old beagle of the lead and he went over to some young lad who must have been about 11 and the young lad started screaming, it's a fúcking beagle, they are the most harmless dogs alive and then i had a heap of adults looking at me as if i was setting some sort of child killing attack dog on people.

I can understand how people may just be afraid of dogs but telling people to get there dogs away from there children is a fairly dumb idea, if the adult is afraid of dogs and acts like that around their children, the child is gonna grow up being afraid of dogs, simple as.

Inexile

Get in first. Shout "Get your kids away from my dog"

Seriously provided your dog is on a lead and not foaming at the mouth I dont think there is any reasoning with this woman.

Just walk by and say good morning and keep going.

Arciphel

I'm guessing since the OP hasn't answered that they don't have their dog on a lead?

Freddie59

Arciphel wrote: »

I'm guessing since the OP hasn't answered that they don't have their dog on a lead?

Looks like it.

eviltimeban

P4DDY2K11 wrote: »

some young lad who must have been about 11 and the young lad started screaming, it's a fúcking beagle,

Sorry, I read that like the young lad started screaming "its a f*cking beagle!", which would have been awesome!

anamaria

There are people who have zero tolerance for dogs and dog owners which is narrow minded and stupid.

However i have noticed some dog owners who have zero tolerance for those who dont like/are afraid of dogs which is equally narrow minded.

I am not excusing this womans rudeness but if she has a genuine phobia and the OPs dog is offlead it is unfair to judge her a drama queen/silly bint. Perhaps she is just intolerant and rude or maybe she is simply afraid.

biko

You don't know. The lady or her kids may have some traumatic background with dogs.
You could try engaging her in small talk and let the children pet the dog etc to let them know it's not dangerous.

Ellis Dee

When I am in Helsinki and walk my dog, he is always on a lead, as the law requires. However, if anyone bellowed at me to get off the pavement, I would just tell them to shut up and, if they continued to bother me, threaten to call the police; if they have a problem with dogs, it is up to them to give me and my dog a wide berth rather than bellowing at me to get off the pavement where both I and my dog have a right to be.:):)

One thing that is different here compared with Ireland is that children invariably ask the owner's permission to pat a dog's head before they try to do so. I often wonder why, and can only surmise that it is a normal part of upbringing to tell children they should do that. Maybe that aul wan who is so rude to you should come over here and learn some manners.:rolleyes:

As it happens, my dog is very fond of children and just loves it when they pat his head.:cool:

DamagedTrax

anamaria wrote: »

I am not excusing this womans rudeness but if she has a genuine phobia and the OPs dog is offlead it is unfair to judge her a drama queen/silly bint.

before calling her a silly bint i said "assuming you have control of your dog".

anyone screaming like that when a dog is under control IS a silly bint in my book.

if OP's dog is bounding up to her and the kids then its a different story altogether.

tk123

I don't know what to reply since we don't know if the dog is on it's lead or not?!
I know the law states under effective control and not on lead 100% of the time but tbh this is a no brainer to me - if somebody is afraid of the dog put them on the lead and pass for a quiet life? I wouldn't risk somebody lashing out or hurting my dog for the sake of having him on his lead while we pass?

If he IS on the lead well then it's unreasonable imo for you to be stepping out on the road?

Bubblefett

If the OP has his dog off a lead I can kind of see the womans point (not to say I agree with it!). She may well be scared of dogs herself, who knows what history she has with them. Or she might just be looking for something to complain about.
I agree with what the OP has done. Crossing the road is avoiding the situation and while yes he shouldn't have to, it's what works out best for everyone.

tbh

P4DDY2K11 wrote: »

Came across one of these the other day, brought my dogs down to the beach and there was some beach clean goin on.
Had my 5 month old beagle of the lead and he went over to some young lad who must have been about 11 and the young lad started screaming, it's a fúcking beagle, they are the most harmless dogs alive and then i had a heap of adults looking at me as if i was setting some sort of child killing attack dog on people.

I can understand how people may just be afraid of dogs but telling people to get there dogs away from there children is a fairly dumb idea, if the adult is afraid of dogs and acts like that around their children, the child is gonna grow up being afraid of dogs, simple as.

Unfortunately, you don't get to decide whether that child should be exposed to a dog or not. your decision to let your dog off its leash caused that child to be terrified. That's it. you may thing that the child was over-reacting, but when that situation happens, you leash your dog, you apologise, and you get away from the child. that's part and parcel of being a responsible dog owner. same goes for the OP. if the dog is on a leash, then its the other woman's issue, don't worry about it. if not, leash the dog. black and white.

mymo

I suggest stopping when they are approaching and telling the dog to sit (on the inside of the footpath), then politely tell her to walk past as the dog won't move.
Some people do have a terrible fear of dogs and can be irrational about it, if the dog is on a lead, under control and calm, does the above, there is nothing more you can do.

Eire.

I was at the beach the other day and this huge dalmation came bounding over to my son (4) and frightened the life out of him, I was really mad at the owner. Dogs are not meant to be left off the leash, there is a clear sign stating so yet it is ignored completely. And the mess which is just left there after them is disgusting! In the summer it really maddens me to see dogs roaming around free, peeing and pooping everywhere on a public beach, it's a health hazard! Sorry a bit off topic I know, by the way I love dogs!

evolving_doors

if you enslave an animal for your own pleasure it's cruelty.
Dogs lick their own genitals and can carry pests/disease.
I have to negotiate my way with my child through dog excrement in the parks and footpaths beach every day because the council and other people won't do their job, and this will never change..

so if you really love your dog then keep it in your own backyard.... I dont want them in my life..maybe consider giving the money you'd spend on an animal to a charity for humans!

Am I banned yet...the truth hurts

Dyr

meet her without the dogs, start roaring at her about her kids.

Irrational goes both ways

Bubblefett

Armelodie wrote: »

if you enslave an animal for your own pleasure it's cruelty.
Dogs lick their own genitals and can carry pests/disease.
I have to negotiate my way with my child through dog excrement in the parks and footpaths beach every day because the council and other people won't do their job, and this will never change..

so if you really love your dog then keep it in your own backyard.... I dont want them in my life..maybe consider giving the money you'd spend on an animal to a charity for humans!

Am I banned yet...the truth hurts

After reading the first line of your post I stopped reading. That one line shows you knowledge and lack of on the subject

Radharc na Sleibhte

Armelodie wrote: »

if you enslave an animal for your own pleasure it's cruelty.

so if you really love your dog then keep it in your own backyard....

I actually did ROFL
My god :rolleyes:
:pac:

littleredspot

deandean wrote: »

About three times her mum has really lashed into me, 'Keep your dog away from my children' - serious stuff. I end up walking out onto the road with my dog and kids.

Am I missing something here? Asking someone to 'Keep your dog away from my children' is a perfectly reasonable request surely. Nowhere does the OP mention screaming or cursing or insults to the dog or OP. Nor is there any mention of the lady asking the OP to walk in the middle of the road with their kids.

I'm not a dog owner but I'm certainly not afraid of them. I'm happy that my kids like to stop to pet other peoples dogs, but I am always very vigilant about it, as I don't know anything about the temperment of the dogs or their owners. Also despite my best lessons, my 2 year old doesn't know exactly how to pet a dog yet and could easily poke them in the eye!

Dogs are often quite boisterous and like to jump up on people which to a small child can be very frightening. Everyone is assuming that the lady who complained has some sort of phobia that she's passing on to her children, but couldn't she just as easily be protecting a child who dislikes dogs?

Ddad

If the dog isn't on a lead I can see the problem. Lot's of children who aren't familiar with dogs are freaked by the drooling toothy monster that's bounding towards them. If you were confronted by a drooling dog the size of a cow bounding towards you, you might be slightly alarmed. That's the perspective of a four year old child.

I've a very bouncy collie x who is kept on a short lead next to other people not because he's a danger; I keep him on a short lead because I respect the rights of others to not have a dog n their face. If they like dogs, great, come on over.

I posted before about a twit of an owner who's boxer puppy knocked over my daughter and niece. She came out with the gem "he's only a puppy" (with a greater body weight than my four year old). All of our dogs are lovely in our eyes; but, they aren't lovely to everyone. Responsible dog ownership entails your dog isn't a nuisance to others. It can be a nuisance to you. I have to do poo patrol around the yard. Cheers:)

Amzie

deandean wrote: »

So every day I walk my kids to school, I bring the dog too.

I meet a woman coming the other way. She has two kids, one aged about 5 (going to school) who doesn't seem too bothered, and one kid aged about 3.

About three times her mum has really lashed into me, 'Keep your dog away from my children' - serious stuff. I end up walking out onto the road with my dog and kids.

Now my dog is well socialised, he would offer the paw to a stranger.

The problem I see here is the mother - she freaks out rightaway, and as a consequence her kids get frightened. I have thought of saying to her - come here, let your kid say hello to my dog & pat him etc, but the meetings are too nasty for this.

So at the moment I see her coming and I go onto the road with my dog & kids and let her & her kids walk along the footpath while she gives me a dirty look - it is just a bit unfair to my side!

The woman, it seems to me, has an irrational problem with dogs and whatever about her I am sad to see she is passing this onto her kids.

Anyone been in this situation before? Ideally I'd like to share the footpath.

Thanks,
Dean

You have every right to walk you dog on what route you wish! Its a free world and she shouldnt be dictating to you where you bring your dog once you have it undercontrol and obviously not hopping all over her children:)

she obviously has a huge fear of dogs which she will pass on to her poor children!! Ignore this woman, I certainly wouldnt be moving out onto the road just to please her either, why should your children have to move aswell!! :mad:

3DataModem

The problem here is that most (the vast majority) of dog owners are responsible. However ... a parent cannot effectively control what their 3 year old does when they encounter a dog. So a dog may be placid or well behaved, but may not be so placid when a toddler bops him playfully on the nose with their hand, or accidentally sticks the staw from their juice box into the dogs eye. Some otherwise well behaved dogs can react badly to this (understandably), and this is where the trouble happens. Dog owners can argue "the child only has itself to blame, not dog's fault" and the parent may say "the child is only 3, not child's fault".

tk123

Armelodie wrote: »

if you enslave an animal for your own pleasure it's cruelty.
Dogs lick their own genitals and can carry pests/disease.
I have to negotiate my way with my child through dog excrement in the parks and footpaths beach every day because the council and other people won't do their job, and this will never change..

so if you really love your dog then keep it in your own backyard.... I dont want them in my life..maybe consider giving the money you'd spend on an animal to a charity for humans!

Am I banned yet...the truth hurts

Kids make noise screaming and crying and run/cycle/scoot in my way every day in the park. They and their owners leave a mess everywhere they go - wipes, nappies in bushes, drinks bottles, food wrappers all over the place. They drag out of my dog without asking or scream that he's going to eat them when he's by my side on his lead minding his own business while their owners sit drinking coffee not paying them any attention.
I don't wan't other peoples brats in my life but accept them where I walk the dog as their parents taxes pay for the park too. The same way that I and everyone else is entitled to use the footpath.
I give them the beneift of the doubt - for every 9 little brats there's one well behaved child who asks to pet and cuddle my dog or says hello to him.

If the OPs dog is on it's lead minding it's own business then the other person has no right to be telling them what to do imo. I'm thinking there's more to this than meets the eye though ..?

Fenian Army

Em, get your dog away from the kids.

Some people hate dogs or are terrified of them, nothing annoys me more then people letting their dogs run amok, running over to strangers.

I hate it, half the time people dont even have their dogs trained properly, ie they jump up. When I was a child I was terrified of dogs, I didnt understand they were just coming over to say hello. I know that now but when people who dont have dogs see one running over to their small child naturally they are scared, apprehensive and annoyed at the inconsiderate owner. Dogs bite afterall.

What I do when I see small kids and I can't cross the road or whatever is get my dog (golden retriever) to sit calmly on the side of the path until they pass. If they want to pet the dog I generally let them unless I'm in a rush.

Many dog owners have a sense of entitlement, but not everyone likes dogs, and people, especially kids who may be afraid of dogs, come first.

IvySlayer

If the dog is under control (doesn't have to be leashed) she should feck off and mind her own business.

star-pants

Armelodie wrote: »

Am I banned yet...the truth hurts

Yes you are. I suggest you consider what forum you're in and tone down you language before returning. FYI children aren't always that clean, neither are humans. I clean up after my dogs, and I have to negotiate our way through filth left by parents & children but that's part of life.

deandean

OP here, many thanks all for your replies, it is great to get this feedback!

Yes, absolutely, my dog is always on a lead and is well socialised.

What I see in the woman is a genuine fear - I don't think she is putting this on - and it is sad to see this paranoia being passed onto her next generation.

I am gonna keep my place on the footpath and telling her to stop being so bloody paranoid. I will report back LOL!

Dean

Amzie

Fenian Army wrote: »

Em, get your dog away from the kids.

Some people hate dogs or are terrified of them, nothing annoys me more then people letting their dogs run amok, running over to strangers.

The OP's dog is undercontrol and on a lead,

I agree that dogs should be on a lead and not running around annoying ppl! I always have my dog on a lead when out on walks and if we go to beach I will only leave him off when its quiet:) I'd hate for him to hurt anyones kids as he only wants to play but dosent know his own strength!

I dislike (some)peoples attitude to my dog when I do have him under my control on a lead and they throw looks of disgust as if hes going to eat thim! seriously like they need to get a grip!:rolleyes: theres a mixed bunch of people out there, they either love him and say hes like a fluffy teddy bear or they think hes a wolf (hes a samoyed- friendliest ejit around):P

gud4u

I have four dogs, it still annoys me when others dogs jump up on me, and I will lose it if i'm in my 'Dry Clean Only' uniform or coat.

The OPs problem mother, does sound scared, but could equally just be like my friend who goes nuts if the dogs dirty her kids clothes, it used to be a problem, until I told her clearly, that my dogs are not super trained robots and do get excited from time to time as her kids are the only ones they see. My friend has now agreed to only have her kids over without their best clothes on.

It's only a sugestion, but could you leave the dog at home just one morning and ask her to explain herself, if you think that's something she may be open to. Perhaps it's already gone on too long.
Maybe you'll both see a different side to it, it could just escalate things if you hold your ground now. If she's not interested in improving the situation, then you have done all you can, and by all means, just walk on by, head high, dog and kids in tow.

Fenian Army

deandean wrote: »

OP here, many thanks all for your replies, it is great to get this feedback!

Yes, absolutely, my dog is always on a lead and is well socialised.

What I see in the woman is a genuine fear - I don't think she is putting this on - and it is sad to see this paranoia being passed onto her next generation.

I am gonna keep my place on the footpath and telling her to stop being so bloody paranoid. I will report back LOL!

Dean

Wow, you are giving dog owners a bad name.

So the womans afraid of dogs and you wont even be a bit considerate?

"LOL" :rolleyes:

Its not funny, some people are really scared of dogs.

Bluefoam

Fenian Army wrote: »

Wow, you are giving dog owners a bad name.

So the womans afraid of dogs and you wont even be a bit considerate?

"LOL" :rolleyes:

Its not funny, some people are really scared of dogs.

I think if the woman is really scared of dogs, she should probably keep out of their way, rather than demand the OP get away. I think the woman in question needs to be a bit more considerate.

borderlinemeath

Fenian Army wrote: »

Wow, you are giving dog owners a bad name.

So the womans afraid of dogs and you wont even be a bit considerate?

"LOL" :rolleyes:

Its not funny, some people are really scared of dogs.

Put it this way, if you're afraid of flying do you let rip at the pilot or the airline staff? No - you avoid flying.

If this woman has a fear of dogs it's in HER best interests to avoid the situation ie she should be the person crossing the road to avoid the dog. What entitlement has she that all dogs and their owners must clear from her path? It's clear from the OP that she hasn't been polite or even explained herself - she's just gone on the offensive straight away.

The OP has been considerate of her as he has taken to walking past her on the road with his dog and his children. Do you really think that is unconsiderate???

kylith

deandean wrote: »

I am gonna keep my place on the footpath and telling her to stop being so bloody paranoid. I will report back LOL!

I wouldn't phrase it like that, but if she says anything to you say that you think it's unreasonable for her to ask your children to stand on the road, and assure her that the dog won't go near her. I'd keep the dog on a short lead on the other side of me.

Whispered

How on earth is the OP giving dog owners a bad name? Because she wont allow herself to be bullied out onto the road because of someone and their irrational fear?

Fair enough if the dog was running wild, but the OP is perfectly entitled to walk on the path. You can't bend over backwards to please everyone. If the woman has such a fear of dogs she should work on it. It's not up to the OP to.

Fenian Army

Maybe its not irrational.


Always amuses me how so many dog owners dont recognize that people come first and dogs are simply animals.

If the woman is scared of dogs and you know that, the decent thing to do is to try and keep your dog away from that person. Its not that hard, I've already explained what I do, people appreciate it and I've never had any issues.

Whispered

Fenian Army wrote: »

Maybe its not irrational.


Always amuses me how so many dog owners dont recognize that people come first and dogs are simply animals.

If the woman is scared of dogs and you know that, the decent thing to do is to try and keep your dog away from that person. Its not that hard, I've already explained what I do, people appreciate it and I've never had any issues.

A stranger with an irrational fear, who expects me to walk on the road to accommodate them has nothing to do with dogs being animals. It's infringing on the OP's right to use the street. The op is doing nothing wrong, why should they be subjected to a stranger shouting at them?

It always amuses me how people expect dog owners to bend over backwards to accommodate them.

And yes, if the dog is under control then it is an irrational fear.

looksee

I have a close relative who is mad about dogs. As far as she is concerned everyone should treat her animals with the same enthusiasm as she does. Their needs come first. They are the babies who's feelings must not be hurt (:rolleyes:)

Everyone including her frail grandmother should accommodate the dogs, (ie walk round them if they choose to lay across the middle of the floor when visiting the grandmother's apartment) then she wonders why people get just a bit irritated with her. She wonders, but she doesn't come to any reasonable conclusions, and so we go on.

The OP should not be attacked in that way, nor should she have to walk in the road. She should be expected to keep the dog on a short leash near other people, and respect the fact that not everyone likes dogs. There is no need for extreme behaviour on either side.

lrushe

Fenian Army wrote: »

Always amuses me how so many dog owners dont recognize that people come first and dogs are simply animals.

I agree that people come before dogs in a life or death circumstance but this is hardly that.
The women in question not only expects the OP to walk his dog on the road for her convience but also himself & his children which is unexceptable, her comfort does not trumph the OP, his well behaved dog & his children's safety.

iguana

Fenian Army wrote: »

Maybe its not irrational.

Yes it is irrational. A hell of a lot more people get killed and hurt by cars than dogs in this country. Would you stop driving because everyday you had to drive past someone with a fear of cars? Many women who are raped by men develop a fear of men, would you stay indoors if you found out your neighbour feared men for that reason? I have a fear of flying, it's bad enough that at times I feel anxious when planes fly over me. But that's my irrational fear and I don't call up the aviation authority and scream at them for flying planes over my house on occasion.

If someone has a fear of something they actually need to recognise that it is their issue, not anybody else's. In fact expecting others to pander to your fear does yourself no favours. You will never be able to function properly if you don't deal with your fear and learn to either get over it or control it. If someone has a fear of dogs they need to get over themselves. In fact if someone had a fear of cars or men everyone they know would press them to get counselling to learn how to cope and that's what someone who can't walk down a street with a dog on it without screaming, should be doing too.

ppink

If I were you I would not cross the road but I would make sure the dog does not touch her or the kids. I would keep him against the edge of the path.

Then without the kids being there I would have a conversation with her about it.....is it fear or does she just not like dogs. If she is scared i would be explaining to her that she is making herself a target(wrong word but can think of the right one just now:rolleyes:) for the dog. anyone who is on edge always attracts my dogs attention more. I would ask is ther anyway I can help with this. Its up to her then.

I think it must be awful to be afraid of dogs. I have met people who have said from a distance that they were afraid and I would always rein in everybody and move to the side for them.

talkin

what breed is your dog op? i know that some people genuinly have major fears of bigger dogs. i know that shouldnt matter. i was bringing my little dog on the lead and a woman nearly ran when she seen her. some people have had bad experiences with dogs and feel threatened by them no matter what

ziggy23

Armelodie wrote: »

if you enslave an animal for your own pleasure it's cruelty.
Dogs lick their own genitals and can carry pests/disease.
I have to negotiate my way with my child through dog excrement in the parks and footpaths beach every day because the council and other people won't do their job, and this will never change..

so if you really love your dog then keep it in your own backyard.... I dont want them in my life..maybe consider giving the money you'd spend on an animal to a charity for humans!

Am I banned yet...the truth hurts

^^^mother of god I've heard it all now:rolleyes::rolleyes:
OP if this was happening on a regular occurence the next time I walked by her I would say in a loud voice''my dog is not going to touch you or your kids'' and then just ignore her from from then on.

skregs

Have your dog attack the kids

<Banned>