When is old enough to get a female childs ears pierced?

Coriolanus

Staying at a friends house. She just got her ... 1 year olds ears pierced. I think it's 1 anyway, it can kind of walk but can't really talk, just points at stuff and makes nonsense words. I think thats about 1?
Anyway, it now has pierced ears.
I personally think it shouldn't be done until probably 10 or something, but it's not my kid so I don't know.

MrStuffins

Parents piercing their childrens' ears is disgusting IMO!

The Internet Explorer

About three fiddy.

paulgalway

Nevore wrote: »

Staying at a friends house. She just got her ... 1 year olds ears pierced. I think it's 1 anyway, it can kind of walk but can't really talk, just points at stuff and makes nonsense words. I think thats about 1?
Anyway, it now has pierced ears.
I personally think it shouldn't be done until probably 10 or something, but it's not my kid so I don't know.

Says alot about the parents !!!

southsiderosie

My ears have been pierced since I was an infant, but I probably wouldn't let my kids do it until they were old enough to a) make a conscious decision about it and b) take care of them properly. I never had any problems with them growing up though, and as far as I know, there isn't any medical reason not to do it when they are young. I guess it's just a preference, really - in some cultures (Indian, for example) this is very common.

Rich11

no thats not right. a 1 year old........,when i have kids and its a girl, they can ask "yeah I want to get my ears pierced", not until they ask

didnt vote cause could be any age

MrStuffins

Why would you want to put holes in your infant?

It's like when parents put their children into those "Cute Baby" competitions or put them up for "Modelling".

"I know, i'm gonna pit my baby in competition against a load of other babies so strangers can judge him/her on whether or not he/she is as good looking as the rest of the babies!

:mad:

southsiderosie

paulgalway wrote: »

Says alot about the parents !!!

Rich11 wrote: »

no thats not right. a 1 year old........

Why is it not right or disgusting or a statement on the parents? It's not like it is circumcision or something that isn't reverseble. It actually makes more sense to get it done when they are infants and can't play around with them when they are prone to infection, or make them wait until they are pre-teens and can take care of them on their own.

yawha

Um, why on earth is 12 the cutoff on this poll?

MrStuffins

southsiderosie wrote: »

It actually makes more sense to get it done when they are infants and can't play around with them when they are prone to infection, or make them wait until they are pre-teens and can take care of them on their own.

Or it makes more sense not to put holes in your baby.

dark crystal

I have no idea why any parent would want to puncture their baby's ears at all. It's needlessly cruel (and looks terrible to boot).

My daughter was nagging me to get it done from a young age, but I held out until she turned 13. Even then, I wasn't too happy about it!

southsiderosie

MrStuffins wrote: »

Or it makes more sense not to put holes in your baby.

dark crystal wrote: »

I have no idea why any parent would want to puncture their baby's ears at all. It's needlessly cruel (and looks terrible to boot).

My daughter was nagging me to get it done from a young age, but I held out until she turned 13. Even then, I wasn't too happy about it!

WHy do you all think piercing is such a big deal?

Maybe it's because my ears have always been pierced as long as I can remember, but I never, ever had a problem with them, and I played sports since I was four. French braiding and stupid pigtails with barrettes are painful, but nobody thinks it is weird when girls have these. I used to HATE getting my hair brushed as a kid.

MrStuffins

southsiderosie wrote: »

WHy do you all think piercing is such a big deal?

Maybe it's because my ears have always been pierced as long as I can remember, but I never, ever had a problem with them, and I played sports since I was four. French braiding and stupid pigtails with barrettes are painful, but nobody thinks it is weird when girls have these. I used to HATE getting my hair brushed as a kid.

Can you give us a single reason why a parent SHOULD pierce the ears of an infant? It might make them look cute? Is that the reason?

dark crystal

southsiderosie wrote: »

WHy do you all think piercing is such a big deal?

Maybe it's because my ears have always been pierced as long as I can remember, but I never, ever had a problem with them, and I played sports since I was four. French braiding and stupid pigtails with barrettes are painful, but nobody thinks it is weird when girls have these. I used to HATE getting my hair brushed as a kid.

Ear piercing is a painful and needless cosmetic procedure. The baby has no say in the matter.

I remember being very young and seeing a baby screaming in pain having just her ears pierced and even then, I couldn't understand why the mother felt the need to do it!

The hair brushing is different, in that it needs to be done. Although, I agree with you, it's a pain in the ass, especially when your hair is long and thick like mine was

Rich11

southsiderosie wrote: »

Why is it not right or disgusting or a statement on the parents? It's not like it is circumcision or something that isn't reverseble. It actually makes more sense to get it done when they are infants and can't play around with them when they are prone to infection, or make them wait until they are pre-teens and can take care of them on their own.

bringing a ONE year old into claire assessories in a pram and sayin will you pierce her ears...:eek: you think thats ok

Typewriter

southsiderosie wrote: »

Why is it not right or disgusting or a statement on the parents? It's not like it is circumcision or something that isn't reversible. It actually makes more sense to get it done when they are infants and can't play around with them when they are prone to infection, or make them wait until they are pre-teens and can take care of them on their own.

Are you for real? :eek: makes more sense when they are infants, what does? So I tattooed my daughter when she was 1, it makes more sense to get it done early otherwise if she older and I enforce it on her she might object?

Do you think it’s something necessary that has to get done?

It’s not your body and if at age 18 they want to get a piercing they will be adults and it’s their own choice.


...and BTW I have had a total of six piercings in all parts of my ears. I had them done starting at age 19, of my own accord. I’ve since taken them all out except one. It’s my body I choose what happens to it, it’s my right.

Getting pierced at such a young age is irreversible and dangerous for an infant.

southsiderosie

MrStuffins wrote: »

Can you give us a single reason why a parent SHOULD pierce the ears of an infant? It might make them look cute? Is that the reason?

dark crystal wrote: »

Ear piercing is a painful and needless cosmetic procedure. The baby has no say in the matter.

I remember being very young and seeing a baby screaming in pain having just her ears pierced and even then, I couldn't understand why the mother felt the need to do it!

The hair brushing is different, in that it needs to be done. Although, I agree with you, it's a pain in the ass, especially when your hair is long and thick like mine was

I can understand wanting to let your child make the decision for themselves, but I don't see what the big deal is. It is a minor discomfort, and unlike other cultural practices such as circumcision it isn't permanent and doesn't affect sexual function (or any other function).

Like I said, I'd probably wait until my kids were old enough (and if I did it, it would be at the doctor's office not in the mall :eek:), but I'm surprised by how hysterical some reactions are to it. I guess it was considered normal where I grew up.

MrStuffins

southsiderosie wrote: »

I can understand wanting to let your child make the decision for themselves, but I don't see what the big deal is. It is a minor discomfort, and unlike other cultural practices such as circumcision it isn't permanent and doesn't affect sexual function (or any other function).

Like I said, I'd probably wait until my kids were old enough (and if I did it, it would be at the doctor's office not in the mall :eek:), but I'm surprised by how hysterical some reactions are to it. I guess it was considered normal where I grew up.

Yeah, but can you actually give me a reason a to why you would do it? What is the reason to have your infant's ears pierced?

I mean, spray-tan isn't permanent either, should I bring my baby to get that done?

southsiderosie

MrStuffins wrote: »

Yeah, but can you actually give me a reason a to why you would do it? What is the reason to have your infant's ears pierced?

I mean, spray-tan isn't permanent either, should I bring my baby to get that done?

I can understand why my mother did it: at that time, and from that perspective, girls wore earrings, so best to get it done young and by a doctor so it could heal properly without me picking at it. I don't mind that she did it, but I would probably let my daughter make that decision for herself (or my son if he wanted piercings when he was older).

To be honest, I never really thought about it before because, like I said, everyone just did it when I grew up so nobody thought it was odd. This thread is interesting.

whatdoicare

8

I used to work in a well known place that did piercings and a child has to have their second lot of immunisations (and proof of such) done before it can get pierced - the amount of times that I had to argue with parents who wanted to get their young baby pierced before that was unreal - like every second child that came into the store - they even went so far as to buy the piercing earrings themselves.

I can't even begin to imagine how they were planning to pierce a babys' ears themselves and I really can't understand why they would put their child in such danger - the amount of infections a child can pick up without adding to them is enough for any parent to be dealing with!

I got my ears pierced for my communion - I didn't give a crap about the dress or communion itself, I was just mad for earrings. My uncle caught me about a month before that trying to pierce them myself with a safety pin after seeing it on "Grease" and paid for them to be done before I did myself some damage!

I bet he's sorry now - I have a grand total of 11 piercings now and five tattoos :pac:

Typewriter

southsiderosie wrote: »

I can understand why my mother did it: at that time, and from that perspective, girls wore earrings, so best to get it done young and by a doctor so it could heal properly without me picking at it. I don't mind that she did it, but I would probably let my daughter make that decision for herself (or my son if he wanted piercings when he was older).

To be honest, I never really thought about it before because, like I said, everyone just did it when I grew up so nobody thought it was odd. This thread is interesting.

I doubt you would find any doctor that would pierce an infant or child's ears.

If i were you I'd be more angry with your mother for putting you at risk at such a young age just for her own self gratification.

http://www.thealphaparent.com/2011/11/is-it-child-abuse-to-pierce-babys-ears.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-30731/How-pierced-ears-leave-infants-agony.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkhvUX7VdWE

whatdoicare

8

Typewriter wrote: »

I doubt you would find any doctor that would pierce an infant or child's ears.

If i were you I'd be more angry with your mother for putting you at risk at such a young age just for her own self gratification.

http://www.thealphaparent.com/2011/11/is-it-child-abuse-to-pierce-babys-ears.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-30731/How-pierced-ears-leave-infants-agony.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkhvUX7VdWE

Okay, first of all that is the wrong piercing gun for an infant!!!! The one for a baby is much more gentle and doesn't make any noise - no baby has ever cried when I pierced their ears!!!:eek::eek::eek::eek: (I don't agree with piercing babies but it was part of my job and I hated doing it)

Also just noticed it says 2 month old baby - it's actually not allowed to pierce in this country until 18 months.

Helix

when the child is old enough to want it done of her own accord and understand what it actually entails

southsiderosie

Typewriter wrote: »

I doubt you would find any doctor that would pierce an infant or child's ears.

If i were you I'd be more angry with your mother for putting you at risk at such a young age just for her own self gratification.

http://www.thealphaparent.com/2011/11/is-it-child-abuse-to-pierce-babys-ears.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-30731/How-pierced-ears-leave-infants-agony.html

Doctors in the US - where I grew up - regularly pierce infants' ears without fuss.

The Daily Mail - which trucks in fanning parental hysteria - and a blog entitled "Alpha Parent" aren't really definitive sources for the actual medical risks from piercing.

Given that piercings were the norm when I was a kid, and given that the actual medical risks are minimal, I don't have a problem with my mother getting my ears pierced as a child. Clearly the norms around this are different in Ireland.

Coriolanus

11

southsiderosie wrote: »

This thread is interesting.

I should probably have noted in the OP, I'm in Wisconsin at the moment.
It definitely seems to be a cultural thing.

Oh, and for whoever was saying the child would be in pain, apparently not. She got a lollipop and didn't cry.

The child/teenager/adult should be allowed to choose when or if they want it, not their parents.

newbee22

I First got my ears pierced for my communion, nearly all the girls in my class did, must have been the tradition back in the day! I got sick of wearing earrings around a month after the big day so let the piercing close up, got them pierced again when i was 17 for my debs. I can still remember the pain, noway should anyone under the age of 12 get their ears pierced!

Gyalist

southsiderosie wrote: »

Doctors in the US - where I grew up - regularly pierce infants' ears without fuss.

The Daily Mail - which trucks in fanning parental hysteria - and a blog entitled "Alpha Parent" aren't really definitive sources for the actual medical risks from piercing.

Given that piercings were the norm when I was a kid, and given that the actual medical risks are minimal, I don't have a problem with my mother getting my ears pierced as a child. Clearly the norms around this are different in Ireland.

Nevore wrote: »

I should probably have noted in the OP, I'm in Wisconsin at the moment.
It definitely seems to be a cultural thing.

Oh, and for whoever was saying the child would be in pain, apparently not. She got a lollipop and didn't cry.

It seems to be a cultural issue in the US and a class issue in the Ireland & the UK. It's very common for it to be done just a few days after birth in the US, particularly among those of Latino heritage. In Ireland it seems to be more of a working class thing, from my observations anyway.

I used to work next door to a place in Dublin City Centre that did very young babies' ears with a piercing gun. Every day there would be screaming babies and it was often quite distressing. During the summer holidays it was mostly middle class kids who'd come in groups to get their ears and belly buttons pierced. The really strange thing is that many of them fainted after having it done. I've seen the ambulance called after some of them hurt themselves in falling heavily to the ground after fainting, and outraged middle-class mothers coming in to remonstrate with the piercers for doing it to their underaged children.

One day I saw a kid of about 15/16 have his ears pierced and though he looked very pale and shaky afterwards, he walked away with a group of his friends. About 25m away he fainted and fell against a hairdresser's shop window and went right through the glass. It wasn't safety glass and I feared the worst for him from all the flying glass but he remarkably got to his feet and walked away without a single scratch!

Beruthiel

Newly pierced ears need to be cleaned twice a day to avoid infection.
Ears should only be pierced when the child wants it and is old enough to look after their own health responsibly.

copeyhagen

lot of "it" talk, like you dont see a baby as being a person?

a person is old enough to get their ears pierced when they reach an age that they can make decisions for themselves, parents piercing kids ears is rotten and cruel.

Ellis Dee

I think it's wrong to pierce small children's ears. Wait until they are able to ask you to have it done, usually because it's a fashion thing at school, and then discuss it with them so that you and they are sure that is what they want.:)

On an amusing note, there used to be a sign in the window of a beauty salon in Grafton Street saying "Ears pierced while you wait".:pac:

It's standard to do it to newborns in spain iirc

I was also surprised as well as SSR when I heard the first reactions on boards about it - for me it was kinda normal too and I never really thought about it
i think in my case i'd let them do it when they're old enough to decide

SuperGrover

Is there any room for a middle ground in here?

I think it looks a bit skangery and should be left well alone until the child comes looking for it (early teens onwards).

But all this 'dangerous' and 'evil' stuff... a bit over the top, no?

biko

11

From After Hours as this concerns parents more than anyone else.

ronjo

2

Its perfectly normal all over Central Europe.

My daughter got it done when she was about 6 months old. She cried for about 1 minute and then was absolutely fine.
I am not 100% sure the reason they do it here and I wasnt thrilled with the idea but I would say virtually every girl here has it done before they are 1 and many in the hospital.

Moonbeam

*mod note*
Closing the poll .
People can give their own opinions on thread about what is or is not a good age.

Please keep your opinions and comments nice.

KittyeeTrix

Got my daughters ears done for her communion when she was 7/8. Got infected, let them close up and she'll let me know if and when she wants them done again......

That for me was the age......7/8 as is old enough to know it will hurt a bit and can decide if she still wanted it done. She did and so we went ahead.

I wouldn't lose the head and say it was "disgusting" to see a younger childs ears pierced just that it's not for me or mine:)

Tow

Nevore wrote: »

I think it's 1 anyway, it can kind of walk but can't really talk, just points at stuff and makes nonsense words

I am sorry to inform you that a child is not an 'it'.

Squiggler

I think even 12 is too young.

I had mine pierced at 16, at my own expense but with my parents' permission. At least at that age I was able to take responsibility for making sure that I kept them clean, avoiding infection and could make an informed decision about whether or not I wanted to have little holes in my ears for the rest of my life.

I know that it can be a cultural thing, but I do not understand people having tiny baby girls' ears pierced. For me it is in the same league as dressing them up in "sexy" clothes. And as for baby boys with pierced ears... I won't get started!

January

Tow wrote: »

I am sorry to inform you that a child is not an 'it'.

The thread was started in After Hours, so I think we'll forgive the OP for that.

Another mod note:
I've deleted some posts that were not appropriate for this forum.

Keela11

Tow wrote: »

I am sorry to inform you that a child is not an 'it'.

Well actually since most people don't form a gender identity until about 2 and half, "it" technically is.

I would let my child pierce their ears (regardless of gender) somewhere between 10-12 depending on their maturity/understanding/desire. 16ish for other ear piercings and 18 for everything else.

I know a girl who had her ears pierced as a baby. She never wears earring and hates her holes but can't make them close.

No, it's not that big of a deal but a good general rule of thumb would be don't mess with somebody's body without their consent. Why some people think this doesn't extend to their children astounds me.

CrazyRabbit

Can a mod please temporarily move this back to AH so that I can post my opinion without getting an infraction?

Coriolanus

11

I wasn't specifically asking the opinion of parents, I am not one myself, but anyway.

RichieC

My ex was Cuban and got them done pretty much at birth...don't. See an issue myself.

Moonbeam

CrazyRabbit wrote: »

Can a mod please temporarily move this back to AH so that I can post my opinion without getting an infraction?

No;)

ash23

I always told my daughter she could get them done for her communion (aged 8) if that was what she wanted. By then she was old enough to understand the process and the care that was needed.
She didn't want them done at that point but I'd say if she asked me I'd let her (she's 9 now).

CrazyRabbit

CrazyRabbit wrote: »

Can a mod please temporarily move this back to AH so that I can post my opinion without getting an infraction?

Moonbeam wrote: »

No;)

OK

Then I'll just politely say that inflicting pain on a child and cosmetically altering their body purely for fashion is wrong in my opinion.

Ok. it's hardly the worst thing in the world...the pain is short and not too bad, and the hole left in the earlobe can heal. But still...the concept is just plain wrong.

simply simple

my parents insisted to get ears pierced when they are very small as there wont be any chance of accidents due to all other activities like playing( team play when we are big) or out abouts,and also because their skin is soft and doesnt hurt much at small age..i dindnt find it wrong doing it but had doubt about how things would work so got it done when my daughter was 18 months old but got it removed again because i feared that she might get some threads of the blankets stuck there and would cause problems as she jiggled all the too much by then..but when she got 2 and half she asked for it,i want to look good like mummy and daddy would buy me earings as gift then( jealous about the gift from my hubby to me ) so i got her ears pierced,it didnt hurt much, she smiled when they pierced her ears and of course chocolate worked well togather
so according to me 3 -5 years is the best time,but thats just my opinion,some may feel it right and some may think it wrong. but i guess all girls want to do it 1 day or other as this adds to their beauty

username123

Please dont ever do it. Let the person decide for themselves as an adult.

My parents had my ears pierced before my communion and they have been nothing but a disgusting itchy infected mess whenever I wore earrings since.

Now (Im nearly 40) I have two ugly holes in my ears that periodically decide to become infected anyway, and ooze for a day or two.

Its gross. You wouldnt tattoo your child so why pierce them?

I am against all body modification (unless for medical reasons) until the person is old enough to make (and possibly regret) their own decision on it.

I personally find piercing disgusting anyway and often think I can smell peoples piercings.

Abi

My sister had her daughters ears pierced when she was 1 or there abouts. She never said anything to any of us about going to get her ears done, and I think all of our reactions where more or less the same - 'what the hell for?'

I was allowed to have my ears pierced when I was about 12 or 13, and that was only when I asked if I could be allowed. I don't think theres any reason to have your childs ears pierced unless they express an interest in it, and you're sure they understand the after care that goes into it.

I personally thought it looked wrong on my niece, but the damage was already done before I could even ask my sister to re-consider and why.

January

The answer to the question is, when they are able to go to a reputable piercer, one who has been trained properly, who will do it with a needle and not one of those horrible horrible piercing guns. Why would anyone suppress their child to a blunt object being pushed at force through their ears?