witnessed somethin hilarious last night

EdenHazard

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

Celly Smunt

i was jockeying yore ma last night.

El Guapo!

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny,

You're not wrong there......

PseudoFamous

That was very funny, O p.

I wish I could witness events as funny every day.

EdenHazard

ah well i was in a bad mood with my lack of pulling so this got me out of my bad humour, he was just so small and trollish.

Rafloution

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

I'm still waiting for the hilarious bit.

TanG411

OP is steamboats.

Fear Uladh

pmcmahon wrote: »

i was jockeying yore ma last night.

Only the 1,000,000th time you've peddled out that same ****ing ****e joke.

Almost as many times as I rode yore ma.

Celly Smunt

Fear Uladh wrote: »

Only the 1,000,000th time you've peddled out that same ****ing ****e joke.

Almost as many times as I rode yore ma.

my ma's dead.

EdenHazard

Rafloution wrote: »

I'm still waiting for the hilarious bit.

He was a jockey
he was smashed
he looked like a gremlin
he was pleading his innocence to get back in, seeing him escorted had me in stitches

what a combo for comedy

Wertz

So OP how good lookin' was the jockey on a scale of 1 to 10? Or should that be on a scale of 10 to 1? Or 5 to 4?
Would you left him ride you if he promised to give you a good tip?

chucken1

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

He was? hmmmm :rolleyes:

bassy

op could be raggamuffling

EdenHazard

Wertz wrote: »

So OP how good lookin' was the jockey on a scale of 1 to 10? Or should that be on a scale of 10 to 1? Or 5 to 4?
Would you left him ride you if he promised to give you a good tip?

im a guy and not a homo but this guy was like a 1 hahah

FearDark

Any other anecdotes OP.
That first one was great.

Wertz

So a sure thing then eh?

christ on a bike!

LMAO OP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You're like a roflcopter dropping lol bombs all over the place!!!!!!!!!!!!!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Turpentine

EdenHazard wrote: »

im a guy and not a homo but this guy was like a 1 hahah

You're saying you'd give him one?

Dudess

EdenHazard wrote: »

was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me

Jeez, how did a smooth operator like you not pull...?!! :eek:

EdenHazard

ye i dunno, dance floor was a bit busy so couldnt pull off my chris brown moves

Celly Smunt

EdenHazard wrote: »

ye i dunno, dance floor was a bit busy so couldnt pull off my chris brown moves

Punching your potential women in the face?

Wertz

Turpentine wrote: »

You're saying you'd give him one?

Nah, he's saying he was really thin...

whirlpool

Well I laughed. Screw yiz all.

christ on a bike!

whirlpool wrote: »

Well I laughed. Screw yiz all.

Ah they're a cross aul bucnh around here
Funniest thing I ever heard on a night out was when we were in college and chatting to an Ozzie dude who says really loudly
"Hey Guys, ever **** a girl up the arse!?"

This in a packed pub in Galway and everyone goes quient and stares over, we say shag all jst shuffle the feet and he roars on;

"Aw you should really try it, it's twice as tight and about fourteen degrees warmer!"

I liked how he said 14 and not 15, bet he shoved an aul mercury thermometer up her bum

chucken1

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

christ on a bike! wrote: »

Ah they're a cross aul bucnh around here
Funniest thing I ever heard on a night out was when we were in college and chatting to an Ozzie dude who says really loudly
"Hey Guys, ever **** a girl up the arse!?"

This in a packed pub in Galway and everyone goes quient and stares over, we say shag all jst shuffle the feet and he roars on;

"Aw you should really try it, it's twice as tight and about fourteen degrees warmer!"

I liked how he said 14 and not 15, bet he shoved an aul mercury thermometer up her bum

School is back next week I hope

LCgonnakillme

D. Shelley is that you?

randylonghorn

EdenHazard wrote: »

ah well i was in a bad mood with my lack of pulling so this got me out of my bad humour, he was just so small and trollish.

So let me get this right ... you decided not to pull it because it was so small and trollish?

It's the only one you've got, dude, you may as well give it a regular workout anyway and have as much fun as you can with it!

themandan6611

pmcmahon wrote: »

my ma's dead.

rode to death I heard

focus_mad

randylonghorn wrote: »

So let me get this right ... you decided not to pull it because it was so small and trollish?

It's the only one you've got, dude, you may as well give it a regular workout anyway and have as much fun as you can with it!

Funniest comment on the whole thread.

InkSlinger67

I read the OP and a few posts afterwards. As far as I know the OP done the following:

"Y'know loike I was in my bedroom and I troid t'get into my front room but loike there was a shotgun in the hallway so, y'know loike, it was begging me to put my mouth over the barrell and pull the trigger with my big toe, y'know, loike. So I did."

minidazzler

Dudess wrote: »

Jeez, how did a smooth operator like you not pull...?!! :eek:

I was thinking that myself! When you know how to rank women with numbers you must be onto something. He MUST be a real Pick up artist :P

OP, everyone knows that the best nights for pulling are monday to wednesday in Bars like Whelans in Dublin or the Brog in Cork. Those are the true drinkers that are out, who have no time to play games.

Night Clubs, you'd want to be an eejit to think it's easy in those meat markets. Try...talking to people, it's out there, but it might just work!

seanybiker

pmcmahon wrote: »

my ma's dead.

That's what makes it worse

later12

minidazzler wrote: »

Night Clubs, you'd want to be an eejit to think it's easy in those meat markets. Try...talking to people, it's out there, but it might just work!

How can you talk to someone in The Palace?

Nightclubs like The Palace are for fun, for making out with strangers, for having unpopular opinions in taxi rides home and for making an idiot of yourself.

If you want cultivated conversation, or to meet the girl of your dreams, go to a wine bar. But don't expect to have as much fun as at 'the mart' that is The Palace (imo).

Shane-KornSpace

pmcmahon wrote: »

my ma's dead.

which made it all the more fun...

Seriously, these "yore ma" jokes are really lame.

Ellis Dee

Reading that OP, another landmark in literary history and compassionate insight, I'm sure that one day in the distant future many women will rue the night they let a true catch like EdenHazard slip through their fingers ...:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

mfceiling

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

What happened then?

Immaculate Pasta

So the horse got to stay inside Coppers then?

BroomBurner

It's always entertaining to see young lads finding their way about life, trying to show how cool they are, and always ensuring everyone else knows they're not a "homo".

Circle of Life.

Thankfully, the internet is there to record it all. Thanks OP!

pickarooney

You know there's a Palace on Camden Street as well OP? Sometimes you get under 40s in there.

KTRIC

pmcmahon wrote: »

Fear Uladh wrote: »

Only the 1,000,000th time you've peddled out that same ****ing ****e joke.

Almost as many times as I rode yore ma.

my ma's dead.

I doubt she put up much of a struggle then

Liam Byrne

How did the OP know or was a jockey ?

And does the promised "hilarious" bit come in the next instalment ?

gman2k

pmcmahon wrote: »

my ma's dead.

Never stopped her before...

BunShopVoyeur

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

Ah the worries of a child......


Thankfully our teenage years are short



OP you're a fcuking rockstar...

Dudess

BroomBurner wrote: »

It's always entertaining to see young lads finding their way about life, trying to show how cool they are, and always ensuring everyone else knows they're not a "homo".

Yet at the same time... "100% belieber" in his sig - is that the mark of non homo coolness nowadays? If so, Jaysus!

weeder

pmcmahon wrote: »

my ma's dead.

Dead Gorgeous

dx22

'dork' :pac:

BunShopVoyeur

dx22 wrote: »

'dork' :pac:

I think another poster also said "making out"

Kevin Duffy

OP, he got thrown out of a place you couldn't even get into to begin with, making you an even biger loser than him.

Garzorico

Down with this sort of thing...

krudler

EdenHazard wrote: »

you prob wont find this funny, but anyway was in palace last night and wasnt the best night pulling wise(and by not best night i mean pulled nobody, had 2/10's rejecting me haha, was out tuesday and was pulling 6/7's left right and centre so after i decided head coppers to pull, im not old enough to get in but said i'd give it a shot, so went on my own and obviously didn't get in but when i was there i seen a jockey getting thrown out hahahahah, he was a little troll of a man, hammered, seeing him plead his innocence was the funniest thing i've ever seen...in the biggest bogger accent like ever 'sure amn't i only a jockey i have noway to get home' i was ****tin it laughin, this guy was a total dork..like one of them troll jockeys from the simpsons, just looking at him was hilarious

couldnt get in to coppers? thats the funniest thing I've heard all year.

WolfForager

Going to coppers to pull 7/10s?

We talking about the same coppers here?