Things you do others could view as psychotic

TeddyTedson

I have a notepad I use for keeping a few notes on people I know, nothing amazing written in it really, just money I'm owed, arguments pending, ways individuals have wronged me and nice things people have done for me too. Just little notes, I'm not writing down full blown profiles about people...yet It just helps me remember things though I otherwise might forget. I was thinking though, if I ever murdered someone and the DailyMail got wind that the police found this notepad in my house, they would go to town on me. I can just imagine the headlines:rolleyes:
I also sometimes go to take a piss, and stand over the bowl and imagine I have 5 seconds to piss in the face of someone who has wronged me. I imagine they are taunting me and unless I time it just right a perspex screen will appear and shield them from (and I can't believe I actually have a reason for saying this now) being blasted with my piss.
I have a few more sexual ones that I won't go in to. But we're all a little psychotic in our ways to some extent.
I'd love to hear what psychotic ways others might have.

Celly Smunt

Internet history:

"how could somebody watch such things?! "

Tesco Massacre

Just the ol' bushes-lurking with my night vision goggles.

Tesco Massacre

Note to self: never wrong TeddyTedson.

Millicent

No, OP. You win.

*hides behind sofa*

TeddyTedson

Tesco Massacre wrote: »

Note to self: never wrong TeddyTedson.

Also noted. Don't worry you're in the positive.

pokertalk

my mates think im weird because i dropkick blue bottles all day .i think they are the freaks

TeddyTedson

pokertalk wrote: »

my mates think im weird because i dropkick blue bottles all day .i think they are the freaks

Your post count makes you weird:eek::pac:

3rdDegree

Do you know what the word "psychotic" actually means?

suzzi

Millicent wrote: »

No, OP. You win.

*hides behind sofa*

good advice millicent....:eek:

Sindri

I like to dress up as a girl at the weekends and molest cats. I don't why, it just fulfils me.

pokertalk

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Your post count makes you weird:eek::pac:

normal again dont panic;)

massdebater

OP you need to chill out I think! Keeping notes on people, blasting your enemies with piss etc. Waaaayy OTT :eek:

DEFTLEFTHAND

I never truly forgive anyone who has wronged me. Even if they apologise and I accept their apology, at the back of my mind I'm still thinking I'm going get that fcucker back one day. Muh haw haw.:D

TeddyTedson

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I never truly forgive anyone who has wronged me. Even if they apologise and I accept their apology, at the back of my mind I'm still thinking I'm going get that fcucker back one day. Muh haw haw.:D

If someone apologises and genuinely means it you should forgive them.

pokertalk

TeddyTedson wrote: »

If someone apologises and genuinely means it you should forgive them.

easy now ted. your about to make an eternal enemy

DEFTLEFTHAND

pokertalk wrote: »

easy now ted. your about to make an eternal enemy

Yes take heed Ted you don't want to push me.:D

Chuck Stone

Write this in your crazy book

OP is Paul Galvin!!

Turpentine

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I have a notepad I use for keeping a few notes on people I know, nothing amazing written in it really, just money I'm owed, arguments pending, ways individuals have wronged me and nice things people have done for me too. Just little notes, I'm not writing down full blown profiles about people...yet It just helps me remember things though I otherwise might forget. I was thinking though, if I ever murdered someone and the DailyMail got wind that the police found this notepad in my house, they would go to town on me. I can just imagine the headlines:rolleyes:
I also sometimes go to take a piss, and stand over the bowl and imagine I have 5 seconds to piss in the face of someone who has wronged me. I imagine they are taunting me and unless I time it just right a perspex screen will appear and shield them from (and I can't believe I actually have a reason for saying this now) being blasted with my piss.
I have a few more sexual ones that I won't go in to. But we're all a little psychotic in our ways to some extent.
I'd love to hear what psychotic ways others might have.

Good lord, surely if those things are important enough you'll remember. That or you know too many people and have very few actual personal relationships.

I think you should get stuff tattood on your chest, Memento style.

phasers

there's no topping your crazy OP...


Me, I nibble the chocolate off my maltesers before I eat the malt bit

pragmatic1

I fcukin lose the plot if anyone messes with my dinner or annoys me when I'm eating.

CardBordWindow

I shoot cats

Oranage2

Ha what a funny thread Ted -

jonnyfingers

I randomly follow people and when they start to notice I quickly say something into my sleeve and run away.

starbelgrade

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I have a notepad I use for keeping a few notes on people I know,

I also sometimes go to take a piss, and stand over the bowl and imagine I have 5 seconds to piss in the face of someone who has wronged me. I imagine they are taunting me and unless I time it just right a perspex screen will appear and shield them from (and I can't believe I actually have a reason for saying this now) being blasted with my piss.

:eek:

What the fuck????!!

Super-Rush

Thats mad Ted.

Carverkid

pragmatic1 wrote: »

I fcukin lose the plot if anyone messes with my dinner or annoys me when I'm eating.

Same. My food, no touchy. Comprende? :mad:

Saila

3rdDegree wrote: »

Do you know what the word "psychotic" actually means?

he clearly doesnt, blame holywood :rolleyes: KUNTS!

although his last example with the pissing is borderline

Ill use this time to explain the propper meaning, basically means holding false beliefs which are unlikely to be real examples of which are believing the newspapers are sending coded words and messages, seeing and hearing things which are not there and believing they are. but yet its not delusional or psychotic to believe in a man with long hair and a beard who grew up in the dessert and created a ship which could fit 2 of each kind of animal on the planet

RichieC

I remember it was weird to have a PC. now everyone has one I feel mad average.

minidazzler

TeddyTedson wrote: »

If someone apologises and genuinely means it you should forgive them.

If it's a freind I'll forgive and forget quite quickly.

If someone wrongs me first time I meet them, I'm likely to give them one chance at redemption and after that I never associate with them again.

cnoon

It"s NOT me that"s MAD it"s the rest of the WORLD!

Plazaman

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I have a notepad I use for keeping a few notes on people I know, nothing amazing written in it really, just money I'm owed, arguments pending, ways individuals have wronged me....

And now on to liars........

(said by another Ted I believe...)

Johnny D. Mudd

Believing in God. (Apparently)

TeddyTedson

minidazzler wrote: »

If it's a freind I'll forgive and forget quite quickly.

If someone wrongs me first time I meet them, I'm likely to give them one chance at redemption and after that I never associate with them again.

Oh yes I know what you mean. Although sometimes you have to associate with them through mutual friends. You can just try to turn everyone against them unless you are will to take extremities.

suzzi

El Pistolero wrote: »

Thats mad Ted.

down with that sort of thing!

**hiding the cats from cardboardwindow!**:(

minidazzler

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Oh yes I know what you mean. Although sometimes you have to associate with them through mutual friends. You can just try to turn everyone against them unless you are will to take extremities.

A friend started going out with a girl who the first 2 times I met her she slapped me with no reason, there are a lot of girls who have had reason to hit me, she didn't. So I told him I consider her a cnut and not to take her out when I'm around or I'll walk away, given I am generally better friends with the core group he knew they would come with me. So basically, I am willing to take it to extremes to avoid someone I don't like, if she had touched me once more she was gonna get hit, which I didn't want to do, but she needs the lesson TBH.

Wetai

Carverkid wrote: »

Same. My food, no touchy. Comprende? :mad:

JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD.

Micky Dolenz

I talk to myself out loud a lot.

red menace

All my posts are mnemonics I use to communicate with the lizard people
I hope they just read the first letters of each word and not the words or else I'm ****ed

smallBiscuit

We're all a little mad, aren't we, haha : D my form is taking to me while I'm eating breakfast cereal. Other things, toast, a fry are fine, but leave me alone when I'm eating my cornflakes!


But keeping notes of when people wrong me, thats a sign of deep deep issues! Lighten up! We enter the world with nothing, we leave the same, all between is fluff.

Wattle

When someone accidentally bumps into me in the street and says 'sorry' I always mutter 'you should be' under my breath.

Fookin bonkers I am.

TeddyTedson

smallBiscuit wrote: »

We're all a little mad, aren't we, haha : D my form is taking to me while I'm eating breakfast cereal. Other things, toast, a fry are fine, but leave me alone when I'm eating my cornflakes!


But keeping notes of when people wrong me, thats a sign of deep deep issues! Lighten up! We enter the world with nothing, we leave the same, all between is fluff.

Don't be so over the top. There also positive things written in there. It's just like a more direct straight to the point diary of sorts. I don't need to remember ****e like how I was feeling when someone didn't acknowledge my birthday, I just need to make a note so if that person is still in my bad books coming up to their birthday for example, I can manipulate other people to do something else than attend there potential party. As an example. I usually don't need to do anything though, I'm a very passive forgiving person

Wattle

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Don't be so over the top. There also positive things written in there. It's just like a more direct straight to the point diary of sorts. I don't need to remember ****e like how I was feeling when someone didn't acknowledge my birthday, I just need to make a note so if that person is still in my bad books coming up to their birthday for example, I can manipulate other people to do something else than attend there potential party. As an example. I usually don't need to do anything though, I'm a very passive forgiving person

Why don't you imagine your taking a nice big dump on their head instead? Much more satisfying IMO

TeddyTedson

Wattle wrote: »

Why don't you imagine your taking a nice big dump on their head instead? Much more satisfying IMO

I honestly never have even though it would be much more degrading for them. It's just when I'm standing over the bowel I think there is a man counting down and most of the time I time it to perfection. The target will be taunting me and thinking that I'm not going to get it for the 4 seconds and then I the last the piss just explodes towards them

Warper

I keep hearing voices saying KILL KILL KILL. Then i kill the next mother-fcuker i come across and take their phone. Then i throw the phone away and laugh. God its exhilarating.

John Doe1

I just murder everyone, crazy right?:)

amacca

TeddyTedson wrote: »

It's just when I'm standing over the bowel I think there is a man counting down and most of the time I time it to perfection. The target will be taunting me and thinking that I'm not going to get it for the 4 seconds and then I the last the piss just explodes towards them

man I don't need that kind of pressure when I'm trying to have a nice relaxing piss

you've just potentially ruined pissing for me for a while.

chucken1

Teddy...sweetheart?
You do know the difference between REAL LIFE and AFTER HOURS???

Micky Dolenz

chucken1 wrote: »

Teddy...sweetheart?
You do know the difference between REAL LIFE and AFTER HOURS???

I could have sworn this was the nest.

chucken1

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

I could have sworn this was the nest.

Not yet?!