Ringing in sick when not sick

Scanlas The 2nd

When you pull a sickey do change your voice to sound more sick or speak exactly the same as you normally would?

Snowie

Scanlas The 2nd wrote: »

When you pull a sickey do change your voice to sound more sick or speak exactly the same as you normally would?

yeah man lower the tone draw out your words make your self sound terrrible :cool:

MagicMarker

Just text, but be sure to completely fúck up the spelling as if you're in some delusional feverish state of mind.

sbsquarepants

I'm no Al Pacino, i'd get stage fright if i tried to do that!
Just text or get someone else to ring.

thewintermute

always lie down to make the call. Changes the timbre of your voice enough to sound convincing but not OTT

haydar

I hang my head off the side of the bed while ringing.

Always makes you sound sick.:cool:

Scanlas The 2nd

I rang in sick a few days ago, it just didn't feel right speaking in normally so I deepened my voice a bit, threw in a few cracks in the voice, and slowed it down and generally made myself sound slightly depressed. I think I got it just right, I didn't over do it by throwing in sniffles and coughs.

Just say you're in bed with your granny.

You'll sound sick as fúck then.

jester77

Luckily where I work the policy is to send an email

Ringing in is dodgy, had one bad episode a few years back. Went on a bender in France one weekend with a few friends who were living in different countries at the time. I was supposed to get a flight back to Ireland Sunday evening for work the next morning. However the lads convinced me to stay as they were not heading home until Monday. We went on a right session and fell out of the pub on the Monday morning around the time I should be going into work. In my wise state I decided to call in and say I was sick Luckily I got the answering machine... or so I thought.

A few days later I ran into our HR girl in the building, she is real sound and we got on well. I apologised to her for leaving what was probably a very drunken message. She looked confusingly at me and said "What are you on about, sure you were talking to me!" :eek:

The J Stands for Jay

"Hi, I can't come in today; I despise my job.'

''I forgot to pack trousers in my gym bag this morning, do you want me to come to the office in shorts?''

Easy, no questions asked.

biko

Ask your mam to ring.

Gone Drinking

There's rules in our job about texting in sick, we're not allowed do it..

As for getting someone else to ring for you, I can't believe people do this in real jobs?

I've only missed two days since February, both were self induced.

yupyup7up

I never pull a sickie, I don't even ring in sick when sick!

I'd rather go to work and get a bit of a laugh with my workmates than watch Jeremy Kyle and the likes all day!

VenusPlays

biko wrote: »

Ask your mam to ring.

Girl who worked with me used to do that. She didn't even live at home! :rolleyes:

Spunge

Gone Drinking wrote: »

There's rules in our job about texting in sick, we're not allowed do it..

As for getting someone else to ring for you, I can't believe people do this in real jobs?

I've only missed two days since February, both were self induced.

apt username

petes

yupyup7up wrote: »

I'd rather go to work and get a bit of a laugh with my workmates than watch Jeremy Kyle and the likes all day!

Well aren't you considerate. I'd tell to to fcuk off home if you came in infecting the place!

Gone Drinking

Spunge wrote: »

apt username

You too..

seamus

Best to do it when you've just woken up. Then you always sound sick.

Not that I do anyway. Sometimes I'll send a text or an email at 7am that I won't be in and I'll ring later. Then I ring in at 10am after a nice snooze.

4leto

If I ever did and off course I never did:o, I would never put my technique on an Irish popular message board.

Err OK paranoid much.

Your Airbag

Insurgent wrote: »

Well aren't you considerate. I'd tell to to fcuk off home if you came in infecting the place!

He's right though. You get paid to be sick. Only take your sick days when your sweet and clean. They become leave days then and you can actually do something enjoyable.

Companies will squeeze every last working minute out of you so we should do the same.

couerdelion

Insurgent wrote: »

Well aren't you considerate. I'd tell to to fcuk off home if you came in infecting the place!

Except the topic of the conversation is "Ringing in sick when not sick"...


All staff in my place have to ring in. it's not acceptable to get someone else to ring in for you unless you have a medical reason which prevents you from using the phone.

Joe_Box

There's a story in our office of a guy who once rang in sick at 8:30 with one excuse, then went back to sleep and was so hungover that he forgot he had rung in sick, so when he woke up again about an hour later, he rang again to call in sick, but had a different excuse this time!

petes

couerdelion wrote: »

Except the topic of the conversation is "Ringing in sick when not sick"...

It is but that particular poster said that they go in sick or not.

Well that's how I picked up their post anyway.

Sirsok

Questions never get asked when you tell them you have a case of the green apple splatters....i know from experience

yupyup7up

Insurgent wrote: »

Well aren't you considerate. I'd tell to to fcuk off home if you came in infecting the place!

Yeah this has happened, but at least I don't take advantage of sick pay! There's plenty off lazy F*ckers out there who ring in fraudulently and still get paid for it. Being off work is shite unless there is actually something to do like!

irelandrover

yupyup7up wrote: »

Yeah this has happened, but at least I don't take advantage of sick pay! There's plenty off lazy F*ckers out there who ring in fraudulently and still get paid for it. Being off work is shite unless there is actually something to do like!

Yeah, but you go to work when sick, infect other people, who then have to call in sick. So you still cost the company money and possibly even more if you infect multiple people.

westies4ever

This is really bad and I dont make a habit of it but it works - stick wads of tissue paper up each nostril before you ring in - it makes you sound like you're dying of the cold!

The J Stands for Jay

yupyup7up wrote: »

. Being off work is shite unless there is actually something to do like!

Somebody doesn't have a playstation...

brummytom

I rang in about 2 hours ago saying I was sick (I've got school work to do), now I do feel sick.


Must be karma

yupyup7up

McGaggs wrote: »

Somebody doesn't have a playstation...

Yep you're dead right, I've an Xbox 360.

themadchef

McGaggs wrote: »

Somebody doesn't have a playstation...

Or a house to clean, fanny, legs, eyebrows to wax, booty to tan, nails, hair and make up to do. Nah, fukkit, youre right, Yetti look, pyjamas and playstation it is :pac:

yupyup7up

irelandrover wrote: »

Yeah, but you go to work when sick, infect other people, who then have to call in sick. So you still cost the company money and possibly even more if you infect multiple people.

Can't infect people with a hangover/headache etc.

ZeRoY

Fun topic - I wouldnt know as i dont recall ever pulling a "sickey"

irelandrover

yupyup7up wrote: »

Can't infect people with a hangover/headache etc.

What's that got to do with you going to work when you are in fact sick?

az2wp0sye65487

Never rang in sick unless I genuinely was sick.

I also despise people who do.

Yes, I'm talking about YOU!

cruiser178

yupyup7up wrote: »

Yep you're dead right, I've an Xbox 360.

Xbox FTFW


Tried ringing in sick this morning but my boss said no fcuking way was I staying out and to get my ass down and sign on now...bas£%*d :mad:

Orando Broom

I start to break down and I plead with the person not to leave me. then I try to pass on the pertiant information.. I.......Can't............................ then I drop the phone, make my breathing sound laboured and I have a pre recorded tape with angry Russian voices shouting and machine gun fire.


Works every time! :cool::cool:

chin_grin

Pulling a sicky is a skill. You should never put on a voice. Or if you are make sure you ring first thing in the morning when you're hoarse. Also make sure it's not a Monday or Friday as that sets off HR's bullsh!tometer.

At least 3 out of 5 times blame it on food poisoning. Cold\flu is just a lame excuse. Extra points if you fake puking\sh!tting yourself while on the phone. (Pour some water in to the sink\toilet bowl).

Another method is the "plant". A few days before you want to pull a sicky keep passing in conversation that you're not feeling too well and have a packet of lemsip or rennie or something on the desk.

Hmm. Actually I haven't pulled a sicky in ten months! I'm sure I'm due one. :P

Yakult

yupyup7up wrote: »

I never pull a sickie, I don't even ring in sick when sick!

And by doing so you put other individuals at risk of getting sick..

I hate when sick bastards come in to college and pass their ****ty germs onto me. Stay at home for the sake of a day or two.

jester77

chin_grin wrote: »

At least 3 out of 5 times blame it on food poisoning.

I used to do that until karma came back and bit me in the ass. Myself and a colleague went out drinking mid week and we were not so good the next morning, so we called in sick and blamed supermacs. We thought it would look more authentic if we were out for a second day so we called in sick again.

The following Friday night I was out and had some supermacs afterwards. Worse food poisoning I've ever had, spent all of Sat and Sun bent over the toilet in absolute bits... damn you karma!

k4kate

I rang in sick twice when I wasn't but felt so bad about it worked extra time the next few weeks to make up for it. A conscience is an awful thing

AeoNGriM

Anyone else feel ropey ringing in when you're actually, genuinely sick? As if your boss or whoever you're talkin to reckons you're pullin' a sly one regardless of the fact that your bowels are working like a set of bagpipes on Hogmanay?

In my old job, I used to time ringing in to co-incide with my bosses break so I'd get the answering machine and wouldn't have to speak to him personally. He was a cnut and even if you were dyin with the flu he'd grumble at ya down the phone and make you feel guilty.

THE PRESSURE MAN, HOW DYA DEAL WITH THE FECKIN PRESSURE?!!!! :pac:

Azureus

Never called in sick...tempted a few times, but conscience always gets the better of me. Would if I was genuinely in bits though.

Only went home sick from work once-was damn impressed with myself coming in, dying with a hangover but by 11am I had to go into the bosses office to tell her I was going home because I had a migraine, despite probably still reeking of sambuca from the night before. Oops.

Lollipops23

Have only rang in sick once in the last year- it was genuinely down to "lady problems". Got my mid 30s male boss on the phone at 6.45am. He was more awkward about it than me and wanted to get off the phone as fast as possible.

Hank Scorpio

Done it a good few times, It's a Bastard when you do it once or twice in a short period of time as you feel like you've used up all your sickies

OneArt

Had a wonderful night last Christmas which involved alcohol and a whole alphabet of narcotics... Was working at 12 the next day and it had been my only day off all week (six days ugh...). Anyway, get home at four in the morning and I ended up talking to my housemate for hours until about eight. Neither of us slept, were still drunk and hungover. I was hallucinating due to lack of sleep. So I told them I had a migraine.

The prospect of facing throngs of customers in that state makes me want to cry.

bbam

Gone Drinking wrote: »

As for getting someone else to ring for you, I can't believe people do this in real jobs?.

You'd be shocked how often this happens...
Always refuse to accept it and insist person rings in or it will be taken they missed work with no report in... Funny they soon get the ability to ring in themselves...
Also If I feel the piss is being taken I'll ask for a cert for every single following instances for 12 months, that really drops the absence rates

username_x

i cant ring in sick unless i geniunely am, new company policy is a doctors note for every single day you claim to be sick.

k4kate

username_x wrote: »

i cant ring in sick unless i geniunely am, new company policy is a doctors note for every single day you claim to be sick.

My problem with this is I am not fit to be in work but i am ok to queue in doctor's to pass my germs on to others and pay €50 euro for a note for work when i just need one day. If i am to be sick for a week, fine but for one day, crap

IrishZeus

chin_grin wrote: »

Another method is the "plant". A few days before you want to pull a sicky keep passing in conversation that you're not feeling too well and have a packet of lemsip or rennie or something on the desk.

My normal method

bbam wrote: »

Also If I feel the piss is being taken I'll ask for a cert for every single following instances for 12 months, that really drops the absence rates

I used to manage an occupational health medical practice (company doctor) for a few years. First and second day of sickness do not require certs and you actually can't ask for them. Be careful if you do in case they call your bluff.

username_x wrote: »

i cant ring in sick unless i geniunely am, new company policy is a doctors note for every single day you claim to be sick.

See above reply....