Top turn offs

carlybabe1

Thought this would be a good thread seen as how all the AHers have such a brill sense of humour (hope this is ok mods)

Right so folks, just chattin amongst the pals about things that turn ye off...instantly like......as in lightswitch speed :eek:
when you're just about/ in the middle of 'gettin jiggy'

I'll go first

sloppy kisses, you know the ones where ye end up with thier saliva up one (or both) of your nostril....gag city

ANY kind of slapping/spanking will earn you a donkey punch to the head

ANY kind of hair pulling will earn you a loaf to the bridge of your nose


And any interference to the back door will result in whatever digit/member being crushed by my clenched cheeks as i panic. (now I am very aware that I seem to be a minority on this and I dont want it to turn into a debate, its just how i am)

Oh, gimp masks and pvc/leather shorts on a bloke with a muffin top would result in uncontrollable laughter from my side of the room

so AHers, do tell, dyin for a giggle

prinz

Displays of stupidity/ignorance.

stovelid

carlybabe1 wrote: »

as how all the AHers have such a brill sense of humour

?

http://www.rscollect.co.uk/famousfive_anne%20%28Medium%29.jpg

Frank Black

Bad breath/BO


Smell is important.

Kojak

If they have the idea that politicans are decent hard working people.

Scanlas The 2nd

Preference of the imperial system over the metric system.

mackg

ANY kind of slapping/spanking will earn you a donkey punch to the head

ANY kind of hair pulling will earn you a loaf to the bridge of your nose

How many of your sexual encounters have descended into fistfights?

On topic: Inability to think for themselves.

carlybabe1

prinz wrote: »

Displays of stupidity/ignorance.

you mean like this_______________________________________________>

Kojak wrote: »

If they have the idea that politicans are decent hard working people.

pablomakaveli

Any girl that looks like an Oompa Loompa prostitute.

Calibos

High heals. You don't look sexy dear, you look like a teetering bandy legged prostitute.

tony 2 tone

carlybabe1 wrote: »

ANY kind of slapping/spanking will earn you a donkey punch to the head

Turn off: people who don't know what a donkey punch is.

RedXIV

a penis

Biggins

* People that body odour reek of stale alcohol from their previous drinking session.
* People who also smell like a foul cigarette ash tray.
* People that just plain stupid and/or accept crap in goods and word from others.
* People that are all talk and no action. I don't let them waste my time. I walk away and stay away.
* Drunks behaving like 5 year olds that also become additional mental assholes. I've no time for them.

Reamer Fanny

Chicks with dicks

Mickey H

Scanlas The 2nd wrote: »

Preference of the imperial system over the metric system.

So you say 15 Centimeters instead of 6 inches? They're both the same. Is this to make it sound bigger??

squod

Anyone who doesn't have completely perfect feet wearing sandals or other kinds of open toed shoes.

carlybabe1

mackg wrote: »

How many of your sexual encounters have descended into fistfights?

On topic: Inability to think for themselves.

just the one

I actually meant turnoffs in the sense of things that might happen while your ehem 'gettin it on', sorry should have said that in op:o

black francis wrote: »

Bad breath/BO


Smell is important.

definitely, sour onions does not an aphrodisiac make, nor does cheesy feet :eek:

py2006

Hot girls with skanger accents
girls will bellies
Body Odour
pretentiousness
false wannabe snobs
lack of sense of humour
Women who ask "what do you do?" within minutes minutes of meeting them!

bronte

Bad hygiene.

Ill mannered toward restaurant staff/waiters -instant turn off.

Ruled over by mother with iron fist. It's one thing to have a good relationship with yore ma, but I've seen some dudes get walked all over.

Not able to do the basic household stuff.

Bad kissers -nuff said.

Guys who flash the cash early on in a bid to impress.

Guys who big themselves up all the time/boast about themselves...comes off as insecure.

Bipolar Joe

Chicks who aren't interested in me.

WinstonOno

carlybabe1 wrote: »

And any interference to the back door

relationship killer right there...

MitchKoobski

"....but you know I've gotten past all that ever since I accepted the lord Jesus Christ as my saviour"

--Kaiser--

carlybabe1 wrote: »

ANY kind of slapping/spanking will earn you a donkey punch to the head

ANY kind of hair pulling will earn you a loaf to the bridge of your nose

I have to say I found these two statements to be a turn off

Knob cheese. No matter how well their personal hygiene improves, no matter how long a day they have had, one case of knob cheese and he will not be seeing me again. Ever.

In fact, even just a bad smell down there and I'll flee the scene.

Scanlas The 2nd

WinstonOno wrote: »

relationship killer right there...

Poo on your finger when trying to enter the back door.

howamidifferent

Several days of butter stains on the half removed drawers/knickers/panties

jester77

ass grease
b.o.
crusty crotch
dirty nails
excessive yapping
fake tan
greed
hairy nips

--Kaiser--

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

I have to say I found these two statements to be a turn off

I dunno, they sort of piqued my interest...

carlybabe1

true-or-false wrote: »

Knob cheese. No matter how well their personal hygiene improves, no matter how long a day they have had, one case of knob cheese and he will not be seeing me again. Ever.

In fact, even just a bad smell down there and I'll flee the scene.

pmsl cheesey helmuts
the bang o' stilton off ye

stupidusername

true-or-false wrote: »

Knob cheese. No matter how well their personal hygiene improves, no matter how long a day they have had, one case of knob cheese and he will not be seeing me again. Ever.

In fact, even just a bad smell down there and I'll flee the scene.

absolutely. no bigger turn off than a smell from there.

Frank Black

Laughter, after I've removed my boxers.




Though a sense of humour is impotant.

'is it in yet?', it never gets any easier the more you hear it and completely ruins the mood.

Bipolar Joe

When I fail to get a boner, the girl complains.

The King of Moo

"It's ok, I think it's all my blood."

carlybabe1

howamidifferent wrote: »

Several days of butter stains on the half removed drawers/knickers/panties

:eek::eek::eek::eek: eww eww eww ewww, dont think i'll ever look at butter the same way again..thanks for that

jester77 wrote: »

[B

]ass grease

[/B]

:eek: WTF is that

b.o.

crusty crotch

barffff

dirty nails
excessive yapping
fake tan
greed

hairy nips

now thats just laziness, ffs invest in a tweezers :D



pmsl, knew the replies in this thread would be funny

carlybabe1

Deleted User wrote: »

'is it in yet?', it never gets any easier the more you hear it and completely ruins the mood.

:( you should tell them you cant find your way past the hippos lips

Son Of A Vidic

Deleted User wrote: »

'is it in yet?'

If you need to ask this and you are a woman? You must be as wide as the grand Canyon.

If you need to ask this and you are a man? You need to jump off it.

stupidusername

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

If you need to ask this and you are a woman? You must be as wide as the grand Canyon.

ah...no! happened me my first time.

kraggy

A girl who's into labels.
A girl who's into her girly nights with the girls.
A girl who is shallow and thinks about money too much.
A girl who watches Sex and the City.
A girl who watches the soaps.
A girl who wears fake tan.
A girl who goes to mainstream chart music clubs.
A girl who won't watch a film cause it's subtitled.
A girl who....


You get my drift.

Thankfully my girlfriend is the anti-above.

Stinicker

Women who smoke, they can enjoy their lung cancer without me in their lives.

Sonics2k

Pretentious non-smokers.

stupidusername

i thought this was about actual turn offs....during coitus that is...?

Chuck Stone

Apart from the obvious like being clean and alive etc..

Deal breakers.

Needy
Hater
Stupid (don't mind it if they're not heady - just not stupid)
Money obsessed

Clinchers.

Upbeat
Open minded
Compassionate
Loyal

orourkeda

An extremely hairy fanny is a turn off

admiralofthefleet

i dont like -

make up, (women should just be themselves)
women that are full of themselves
women that go on about feminism and equal rights but still expect the man to pay for everything

Nemanja91

Smoking.

demakinz

Nothing worse than a stinking Lady garden.

ShadowGal

carlybabe1 wrote: »

Thought this would be a good thread seen as how all the AHers have such a brill sense of humour (hope this is ok mods)

Right so folks, just chattin amongst the pals about things that turn ye off...instantly like......as in lightswitch speed :eek:
when you're just about/ in the middle of 'gettin jiggy'

I'll go first

sloppy kisses, you know the ones where ye end up with thier saliva up one (or both) of your nostril....gag city

ANY kind of slapping/spanking will earn you a donkey punch to the head

ANY kind of hair pulling will earn you a loaf to the bridge of your nose


And any interference to the back door will result in whatever digit/member being crushed by my clenched cheeks as i panic. (now I am very aware that I seem to be a minority on this and I dont want it to turn into a debate, its just how i am)

Oh, gimp masks and pvc/leather shorts on a bloke with a muffin top would result in uncontrollable laughter from my side of the room

so AHers, do tell, dyin for a giggle

No spanking whatsoever ? Boooo

Bipolar Joe

admiralofthefleet wrote: »

feminism

This.

Lando Griffin

This used to put me right off : Women who you chat up and buy drink for and then when you try to drop the hand, tell you they are in a relationship.
If I am out nowadays and a lady comes to chat me up, I tell her straight away that I am taken.

ShadowGal

Lando Griffin wrote: »

This used to put me right off : Women who you chat up and buy drink for and then when you try to drop the hand, tell you they are in a relationship.
If I am out nowadays and a lady comes to chat me up, I tell her straight away that I am taken.

So you usually buy a woman a drink and then drop the hand.. at the bar ??

Who says romance is dead :cool: