Position Vacant - Wingman With Benefits

keanooo

I am going out with a girl I met recently and her friend to a club tonight. She sent me an email yesterday asking if I could bring some "male company" along for her friend. This was sent at the friend's request.

Her friend is a bit rough looking (I would say a "7" with beer goggles on, and a "5" without), in her late 30s and German. On the plus side she is recently out of a relationship.

My friends are either in relationships, a taxi driver (working tonight) or black (a "no-no" in this girl's case).

Any takers? I'm not too pushed if I don't find anyone, but felt I should make an effort.

(Please make your contributions as helpful and to-the-point as ever).

Absurdum

ok

Sounds like you're going to **** your wingman OP.

Saila

one of us isnt understanding what a wingman is


I dont think its me..

keanooo

Saila wrote: »

one of us isnt understanding what a wingman is


I dont think its me..

Yeah, I know it isn't the perfectly correct term, but I couldn't think of the correct one. Any suggestions?

cloneslad

keanooo wrote: »

Yeah, I know it isn't the perfectly correct term, but I couldn't think of the correct one. Any suggestions?

Going by the description you gave of the Nazi, I would go with 'idiot ready to take the hit so I can get laid'

bijapos

keanooo wrote: »

I am going out with a girl I met recently and her friend to a club tonight. She sent me an email yesterday asking if I could bring some "male company" along for her friend. This was sent at the friend's request.

Her friend is a bit rough looking (I would say a "7" with beer goggles on, and a "5" without), in her late 30s and German. On the plus side she is recently out of a relationship.

My friends are either in relationships, a taxi driver (working tonight) or black (a "no-no" in this girl's case).

Any takers? I'm not too pushed if I don't find anyone, but felt I should make an effort.

(Please make your contributions as helpful and to-the-point as ever).

So in other words your looking for someone to hook up with an ugly German racist for the night. If thats all the friend yout new gf has, I'd suggest you look for a new gf.

Pics or GTFO, and send the pics to the "You Laugh You Lose" thread while your at it.

Absurdum

I said OK :rolleyes:

now where do we meet?

Sweatynutsack

Jesus man if she even sounded a tad better than you described you'd have a few takers

bijapos

keanooo wrote: »

Yeah, I know it isn't the perfectly correct term, but I couldn't think of the correct one. Any suggestions?

Sound like Kamikazi would be the correct term here.

keanooo

bijapos wrote: »

So in other words your looking for someone to hook up with an ugly German racist for the night. If thats all the friend yout new gf has, I'd suggest you look for a new gf.

Pics or GTFO, and send the pics to the "You Laugh You Lose" thread while your at it.

There's nothing wrong with being German or not being good-looking. Loads of women don't like (in the romantic sense) black men. It doesn't make them racist.

keanooo

Sweatynutsack wrote: »

Jesus man if she even sounded a tad better than you described you'd have a few takers

Yeah, I know. But I'm not too pushed if I get someone. I also didn't want to over-sell her and get a WTF? when the lucky boardsie gets to meet her.

It also seemed like too good an opportunity not to start an AH thread about...

ShoulderChip

keanooo wrote: »

There's nothing wrong with being German or not being good-looking. Loads of women don't like (in the romantic sense) black men. It doesn't make them racist.

I think I can agree with that comment, although it does make me feel a tad uneasy

Saila

cloneslad wrote: »

Going by the description you gave of the Nazi, I would go with 'idiot ready to take the hit so I can get laid'

bonus points if the taker is jewish

keanooo

Saila wrote: »

bonus points if the taker is jewish

Come on! The girl is not a Nazi. In fact I know a good few girls (friends) who are uneasy about going to black clubs with me.

Saila

keanooo wrote: »

Come on! The girl is not a Nazi. In fact I know a good few girls (friends) who are uneasy about going to black clubs with me.

does she know you're going to a black club

YouTookMyName

How many pints are you buying? And how did we meet?

keanooo

Saila wrote: »

does she know you're going to a black club

Yes.

It's obviously not all black. There will be a few "pretty fly for a white guy" types there. But if you've ever been to the kind of place, you'd know what I mean.

Absurdum

ugh, application withdrawn

Saila

YouTookMyName wrote: »

How many pints are you buying? And how did we meet?

"oh hi this is dave : points: I just met him on boards, dont worry he wont murder us"

"wait no come back! :eek:"

"I told you to put the machete in your bag dave :mad:"


:pac::pac::pac::pac::pac::pac::pac::pac::pac::pac::pac:\:s/

keanooo

YouTookMyName wrote: »

How many pints are you buying? And how did we meet?

None for you.

Just bring along a print out of this thread by way of explanation. I thought it would be a good ice-breaker...

Pompey Magnus

ShoulderChip wrote: »

I think I can agree with that comment, although it does make me feel a tad uneasy

I don't see why? Does it make you any more uneasy than if she wasn't interested in men with ginger hair?

Guill

How does she feel about leather and strap ons?

:cool:

keanooo

Guill wrote: »

How does she feel about leather and strap ons?

:cool:

Only one way to find out Guill.

Step up to the plate...

Sticky_Fingers

keanooo wrote: »

None for you.

Just bring along a print out of this thread by way of explanation. I thought it would be a good ice-breaker...

I'm sure that would go down well:

"Hi I'm some randomer keanooo met on the internet chat board populated by reactionary nutjobs and serial fappers. He said that there was a bit of rough Teutonic totty going for the asking and since I usually can't get a proper date what with being on the sex offenders register and all I'd said I'd give it a lash."

TheZohanS

I am disappoint.

Here we have a chap offering up a woman for NSA sex and we have no takers in AH. What the hell's happening to this forum?!

wyndham

Is she into watersports?

keanooo

Sticky_Fingers wrote: »

I'm sure that would go down well:

"Hi I'm some randomer keanooo met on the internet chat board populated by reactionary nutjobs and serial fappers. He said that there was a bit of rough Teutonic totty going for the asking and since I usually can't get a proper date what with being on the sex offenders register and all I'd said I'd give it a lash."

Of course with the renowned German "sense of humour" they probably wouldn't see the funny side.

mattjack

keanooo wrote: »

I am going out with a girl I met recently and her friend to a club tonight. She sent me an email yesterday asking if I could bring some "male company" along for her friend. This was sent at the friend's request.

Her friend is a bit rough looking (I would say a "7" with beer goggles on, and a "5" without), in her late 30s and German. On the plus side she is recently out of a relationship.

My friends are either in relationships, a taxi driver (working tonight) or black (a "no-no" in this girl's case).

Any takers? I'm not too pushed if I don't find anyone, but felt I should make an effort.

(Please make your contributions as helpful and to-the-point as ever).

My friend...clearly this is an opportunity for a threesome.......you dont need anyone else.

ShoulderChip

Pompey Magnus wrote: »

I don't see why? Does it make you any more uneasy than if she wasn't interested in men with ginger hair?

I agree that it shouldn't maybe my racist-dar is a tad too fine tuned,
it certainly is for a lot of people on this thread.

stupidusername

does this

keanooo wrote: »

Her friend is a bit rough looking (I would say a "7" with beer goggles on, and a "5" without), in her late 30s and German. On the plus side she is recently out of a relationship.

= this

TheZohan wrote: »

Here we have a chap offering up a woman for NSA sex and we have no takers in AH.

?

keanooo

stupidusername wrote: »

does this

= this

?

stupidusername you just don't have a man's mind, do you?

stupidusername

keanooo wrote: »

stupidusername you just don't have a man's mind, do you?

I try

mattjack

If ya can wait a few hours I,ll ask herself if I can help out...she will want to read the thread first though.

Saila

wyndham wrote: »

Is she into watersports?

moterboating

stephen_k

keanooo wrote: »

None for you.

Just bring along a print out of this thread by way of explanation. I thought it would be a good ice-breaker...

Sticky_Fingers wrote: »

I'm sure that would go down well:

"Hi I'm some randomer keanooo met on the internet chat board populated by reactionary nutjobs and serial fappers. He said that there was a bit of rough Teutonic totty going for the asking and since I usually can't get a proper date what with being on the sex offenders register and all I'd said I'd give it a lash."

If I meet her can I blast her with piss

mattjack

Keanooo....any potential candidates stand out yet for ya..?

Millicent

Can I be Goose? Oh wait, no. Goose dies, right? Can I be Tom Cruise's character? Even though I'm a girl, I don't feel it should exclude me from some 80s montage fun.

mattjack

Millicent wrote: »

Can I be Goose? Oh wait, no. Goose dies, right? Can I be Tom Cruise's character? Even though I'm a girl, I don't feel it should exclude me from some 80s montage fun.

course ya can......

Standard Toaster

Anyone know the German for golden shower?

The_Thing

Does she have to return home alive? If not, then let me know.

keanooo

mattjack wrote: »

Keanooo....any potential candidates stand out yet for ya..?

Well Absurdum was never in the running so his withdrawal was superfluous. What's your story? I'm (fairly) sure she's not looking for a fella who is committed to his girlfriend...

Like TheZohan, whether she's a "5" or not, I'm surprised at the lack of interest.

mattjack

keanooo wrote: »

Well Absurdum was never in the running so his withdrawal was superfluous. What's your story. I'm (fairly) sure she's not looking for a fella who is committed to his girlfriend...

Like The Zohan, whether she's a "5" or not, I'm surprised at the lack of interest.

ummm hmmmm I,ve one of the wife things....thats not the problem shes part Jewish....:pac:

keanooo

The_Thing wrote: »

Does she have to return home alive? If not, then let me know.

I'm afraid so. I don't want to miss out on the brownie points with her friend.

keanooo

The_Thing wrote: »

Does she have to return home alive? If not, then let me know.

Although, now that I think of if, I suppose I would look like a real catch by comparison...

Tehachapi

keanooo wrote: »

I am going out with a girl I met recently and her friend to a club tonight. She sent me an email yesterday asking if I could bring some "male company" along for her friend. This was sent at the friend's request.

Her friend is a bit rough looking (I would say a "7" with beer goggles on, and a "5" without), in her late 30s and German. On the plus side she is recently out of a relationship.

My friends are either in relationships, a taxi driver (working tonight) or black (a "no-no" in this girl's case).

Any takers? I'm not too pushed if I don't find anyone, but felt I should make an effort.

(Please make your contributions as helpful and to-the-point as ever).

I'm a black taxi driver and in a relationship. Think I am your man!

Dionysus

cloneslad wrote: »

Going by the description you gave of the Nazi...

:rolleyes:

Dionysus

keanooo wrote: »

Come on! The girl is not a Nazi. In fact I know a good few girls (friends) who are uneasy about going to black clubs with me.

There are "black clubs" in Ireland? What the hell. That's seriously racist. So much for integration and creating a "new Irish" society.

antodeco

She probably wants my kidneys.

Then some efficient German sex

antodeco

Ye heading out in Dublin? You've seen her before?

keanooo

Dionysus wrote: »

There are "black clubs" in Ireland? What the hell. That's seriously racist. So much for integration and creating a "new Irish" society.

Do you know what you're talking about before making comments like that?