30 Day Rule

Sunnyisland

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Hey guys,

Fell off the horse Saturday which I feel pretty bad about. Got back up Monday though and been a good boy since.:)

MCM You should have learned a lot about yourself, your drinking and the problems that you have. However you should have also learned that the power to change lies within you, provided you have the will to use it.
Success seems to be connected to action,successful people keep moving,they make mistakes,but they dont quit,so if your still up for it start again :-)

Koltashe

But you didnt on Friday! Now that is some progress already!

Look dont beat yourself up! It is not easy, small steps one at a time! Try and organize yourself for this coming weekend, have a good solid plan in place to keep yourself occupied. It takes practice and perseverance and willingness to give up in itself is a big and major step. There will be slip ups, dont be embarrassed about it just accept that it happened see where you went wrong, (e.g. attended a birthday party/had no alternative plans for the evening etc) and look for ways to avoid the same trap next time.

You doing great, keep up at it! Best of luck this weekend!

ShizDink

Hey MCM, I'm jumping on your bandwagon here I realised this morning that I have been drinking for nearly half my life now, and I'm not very good at it at all. I thought I would have built up a tolerance or learn to moderate by this stage but I haven't. 14th of August is 30 days from now. Lets do this

ShizDink

MCM hows it going? I had planned to see a friend in pub on Sat night but didn't go. The conversation with this person generally requires a couple of pints so I thought best to avoid it. I will only be going to the pub with people I can enjoy a cup of tea with. Yesterday went round to a friends house for dinner and was offered wine but refused (had car with me which helped). I did feel sorry for myself at first but conversation moved on quickly and I forgot about it. Dinner was lovely and I didn't overindulge the way I would had I been drinking. Really enjoyed it. Alcohol is such a big part of a dinner party that I assumed the food and the craic wouldn't be half a nice without it. I was wrong. I think the more I do this the less important the drink will be.

Big Nasty

It hasn't been going at all!

Fresh start again today after a pretty heavy weekend of it.

seanrose

Hello guys,

Have been off it now for a week,how i feel this monday compared to last monday is like night and day.Was really a binge drinker at the weekends and i felt like i may as well have been drinking during the week as well the fact that it took me that long for the depression and how bad i felt.

My plan is to the end of August and then i will take stock of my life then and hopefully i will feel like i know longer feel that alcohol should be a part of my life and that my life is better without the hangovers and embarrasment

Sunnyisland

We must try and remember that what your doing truly is "work," and it takes time, effort, and sometimes it costs money. Sometimes it is costly in other ways, as well; friendships and other close relationships will be changed, when we change. And that can be painful. Making this kind of change will have an impact on all areas of our lives; that is a very, very good thing; it can also be accompanied by some pain. Again... we must learn to tolerate the discomforts involved in life changes. There will be some emotional upheaval along the way.But it is well worth the while, You will feel,act & be healthy not just in body but in mind also,Go for it :-)

hubba

Lovely advice, Realies. Good sound advice. I'm still breaking it to friends and family (one by one) that I'm no longer drinking and to be honest, I hold my breath every time because the reaction is mixed. It's rare that anyone is absolutely delighted for me, more often they are suspicious or downright disappointed, and not afraid to say/show it.

It's a bit of a lonely road but I keep reminding myself of the bigger picture, what I want from life for me, not the bar flies I've been hanging around with and I hope that some of my friends, the ones that matter, stick with me. And if they don't, well so be it, I'll find new ones.

clearblue

Hi All
I was just wondering has anyone tried Antabuse or Naltrexone im an alcoholic and cant seem to stop.

Sunnyisland

Never tried them myself so cant say to much about them,But I do know that antabuse makes you sick if you drink on it where as naltrexone you take as you gradually stop drinking,but anyway there are no miracle cures out there :-)

Satanta

You should phone a treatment centre for some advice. What part of the country are you in?

clearblue

Im in Carlow. I went for treatment to thamkrabok Monastery in thailand and stead off it for 6 months but fell off the wagon and i am know as bad as ever and was thinking could these drugs help me

Sunnyisland

Clearblue as you have gone clean before you no what it takes to stop drinking,Meds (imo)can only help you some of the way,most of it is down to us personally,as santana has said ring a treatment centre, here is the numbers for kinda local ones down your way.


Aiséirí Treatment Centres
Aiséirí Cahir tel: 052/ 744 1166 Aiséirí Wexford tel: 053/ 914 1818

ShizDink

Just about 10 days into the 30 and I had a baileys coffee this afternoon in a friends was thinking a glass of wine in the sun before the roast would be nice. Have opted for sparkling fruit flavoured water instead. Still debating the wine though. No actually I can enjoy the roast just as easily without the wine and I won't be sleepy after then. Wine goes so well with a roast though

Going to give it a go myself starting today.

ShizDink

Deleted User wrote: »

Going to give it a go myself starting today.

Yehhhh!!! band wagon away I didn't have wine yesterday to much restraint. I'm not countying a baileys coffee as havin a drink, it was more like a substitution for milk a food group if you will still in the running for a massage.

Molloys Clondalkin

17 DAYS off it myself
after the first weekend it was tough esp with the gf drinking around me,
But I stuck too it and Im doing ok still get the pangs though but there far between now.
something good I found was to watch a whole series of something on tv/online etc once I get past opening hours Im good.

Kaneda_

Ive tried so many times and failed.

Its so hard to get into my head that i will never be able to drink again,its like a loss that im inflicting on myself.

I wonder what my life would be like if i was to quit.

Alcohol and drug taking used to actually be fun,but now the fun is gone, and i see my friends have a similar/same problem, and ironic as it is we only talk about it when we are drinking!

Sunnyisland

People if i may say if you’ve had an addiction to drink for a long time, then you’ve probably not got many hobbies left. In fact quite often, drinking is the only activity you actually do for fun. So when you try and stop, boredom is the biggest hurdle. There’s no way around it – you’re going to have to try some new activities.
When you’ve found a few that you like, make sure you schedule them in every week:
“On Tuesday I’m going swimming, on Thursday I’m going to the cinema with Sally, on Saturday I’m getting out to the countryside for a walk with my partner.”
It will feel weird to some to plan your week this way, but in the early stages of stopping drinking, it’s essential.Go for it.

CatHerder

Hi guys, I'm coming up on 90 days sober now. I'm not really counting them or marking a calendar but I know my last drink was 3rd of May. This is my second attempt to stop. I got 6 months first time round but managed to rationalize my way back into controlled drinking which worked for about 4 months and then went pear shaped. Overall I'm feeling good about myself but it can be hard to have confidence in my sobriety.

realies wrote: »

People if i may say if you’ve had an addiction to drink for a long time, then you’ve probably not got many hobbies left. In fact quite often, drinking is the only activity you actually do for fun.

Like realies saying, the mistake I made first time round was to try to quit drinking without changing my lifestyle. I was actually meeting my drinking mates in clubs and drinking cokes and such This time round I've cut all that out and replaced it with support group activities.

ShizDink

turns out I don't belong on this forum after all. My friends all meet in the pub so giving up drink is giving up my mates have restricted myself to 2 drinks as making small talk in the pub is easier after 1 or 2 (and after all my whinging about 1 or 2 !?) 2 is defo my max though. Some nights none when I bring the car. Fingers crossed this stays at 2.

Sunnyisland

Goodluck shizding :-)

I am sure we be all still here if it doesn't work out,but i am sure it will as most drinkers are very responsible and it is just the minority who are inflicted with this terrible addiction. slainte

Sunnyisland

Good move catherder, Keep posting and letting us know how your getting on as it will help you when you write it down and also help others who are thinking of going the same route.

seanrose

seanrose wrote: »

Hello guys,

Have been off it now for a week,how i feel this monday compared to last monday is like night and day.Was really a binge drinker at the weekends and i felt like i may as well have been drinking during the week as well the fact that it took me that long for the depression and how bad i felt.

My plan is to the end of August and then i will take stock of my life then and hopefully i will feel like i know longer feel that alcohol should be a part of my life and that my life is better without the hangovers and embarrasment

Hey people,thought id give an update.

Have 21 days done and while i felt great the first few weeks,this weekend has been hard,not hard in the sense that i wanted a drink but the fact that i cant stop thinking about my ex who i have lost through the abuse of alcohol.

I have been in the pub with friends and sat with my mineral but my ex was there yesterday,we were chatting up till 3 weeks ago but i decided to try and cut contact so as to try and move forward with my life but she was there yesterday and i didnt really make an effort 2 talk to her.

anyway back to the drinking i have not been tempted by the drink but i wouldnt say that i am happier without it,so much of contact with my friends involves the pub and nights. I will take another look at my situation at the end of august and hopefully an alcohol free life will still appeal to me

ShizDink

seanrose wrote: »

i decided to try and cut contact so as to try and move forward with my life but she was there yesterday and i didnt really make an effort 2 talk to her.

you followed through on your decission so. Had you been drinking you possibly would have ended up talking to her for most of the night and woke up thinking dammit I'm back to square one. Well done.

seanrose wrote: »

i wouldnt say that i am happier without it,so much of contact with my friends involves the pub and nights.

I went out last night with my mates who like to drink. I brought the car. Most had been drinking all day so were fairly merry when I saw them at 7pm. I left at 1am. Lessons from those 6 hours:

1. I would hate to see myself in the state I saw my friends. (I think in my old age I'm developing more respect for myself)
2. NOBODY can drink for 6 hours and not appear a mess (its not just me! );)
3. I am a nervous person in large groups of people and when I'm nervous I will drink a lot faster (just gives me something to do) I drank way too much coke last night
4. Due to 3 I will only be consuming alcohol when I'm in a comfortable environment and not trying to make small talk.
5. The pub is not the best place to meet people of the opposite sex. Drunk people are not sexy be it me or someone else. 2 drunk people together works but then I'd rather not put my sex life in the hands of alcohol. I don't find drunk guys attractive and if they find me attractive when I'm drunk its probably for all the wrong reasons.

Sorry if this seems a bit personal and I'm using this thread as a 'dear diary'! but maybe someone else will find it useful cause I am definitly finding the other posts useful

seanrose

Yeah Shizdink

I totally agree with your lesson no 3.i felt uneasy when we were in a different crowd and before i wud have drank pints into me fairly qucikly and in turn would have been on the shorts earlier.

I jumped in the car told people i had a bit of work to do and id be back,i went back to my house and chilled out for a while and went back to the pub for another few hours,when i returned we were in a group again where i felt comfortable and thus able to mingle a bit better. By that time my friends were fairly on there way but still was able to have a few conversations with them,

Also on your point no5 i totally agree,i used to think that i would have to have a few drinks in me before i chat to women but feel totally different now.my confidence is totally higher compared to when im drinking,when i was drinking the only thing i was interested in was more drink but my interest now is maybe picking up a nice girl when im out.

Felt bit low tis mornin shizdink bout not making an effort to chat to her but at the end of the day i have to wats best for me and me only

ShizDink

Its not like you went out of your way not to talk to her. I am assuming she didn't make an effort to talk to you (being cruel to be kind here). You shouldn't feel low about it. At least its not a depressed hangover! You could be thinking back now wondering what kind of an ejit you were last night.

Its tough this trading partners and friends for what is best for us. Its about time its done though.

What does not kill us makes us stronger. As they say