YIPPEEEE, moving out

Mrs Garth Brooks

Absolutely delighted. Im moving out on saturday. I used to live with a proper nosy cow.

So to give her something to really talk about. What should i do to make my last night fun and her night miserable. She'll never quiz me again.

phasers

Wow you seem like a fantastic tenant, I'm sure she'll be sad to see you go.

chin_grin

Blast everything with p!ss.

AckwelFoley

Sh1t on her pillow.


Or do what a guy from athlone did in OZ, called a taxi, went up stairs opened her bedroom door wanked on her sleeping head, and headed for the airport.


And no, ive never been to Australia

Chris P. Bacon

Sellotape a fish to the back of the radiator,give it a few days though.

chin_grin

Chris P. Bacon wrote: »

Sellotape a fish to the back of the radiator,give it a few days though.

Brilliant!

Mrs Garth Brooks

Chris P. Bacon wrote: »

Sellotape a fish to the back of the radiator,give it a few days though.

Oh that's a good one. She likes her heat too.

squod

Three large black male prostitutes with extra heavy cocks.

Mrs Garth Brooks

snyper wrote: »

Sh1t on her pillow.


Or do what a guy from athlone did in OZ, called a taxi, went up stairs opened her bedroom door wanked on her sleeping head, and headed for the airport.


And no, ive never been to Australia

I can't **** though.

Super-Rush

You should be thankful your mam put up with you for so long.

The King of Moo

Imprison her for fifteen years without explanation.

AckwelFoley

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

I can't **** though.

give your husband my commiserations

Chris P. Bacon

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

I can't **** though.

God loves a trier

oppenheimer1

Chris P. Bacon wrote: »

Sellotape a fish to the back of the radiator,give it a few days though.

The key to the rotting fish trick is to leave one hidden but easily found and the other well hidden. Victim will remove easy fish thinking thats all and the smell is just lingering... but little does she know theres a second one:eek:

rainbowdrop

Leave frozen brussels sprouts hidden in loads of different places around the house! They absolutely reek once they are defrosted...........

Richard Hillman

An upper decker

Mrs Garth Brooks

super-rush wrote: »

You should be thankful your mam put up with you for so long.

That's the thing, she wasn't my mother. Just a very nosy housemate.

Keith186

Throw an all nighter party, invite everyone and blare the tunes.

Should be fun for you while she's trying to sleep!

Xivilai

Clip your toenails in her box of cornflakes

Kiera

Xivilai wrote: »

Clip your toenails in her box

fyp

smugchik

Get a tranny mag. (There must be one out called Transexual Weekly or something to that effect) and leave it sticking out from under your matress. That will shock her.

Paddy Cow

oppenheimer1 wrote: »

The key to the rotting fish trick is to leave one hidden but easily found and the other well hidden. Victim will remove easy fish thinking thats all and the smell is just lingering... but little does she know theres a second one:eek:

Have you done this or had it done to you?

Where To

Set fire to the house
















*after making a distraction that gets her out beforehand

orourkeda

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Absolutely delighted. Im moving out on saturday. I used to live with a proper nosy cow.

So to give her something to really talk about. What should i do to make my last night fun and her night miserable. She'll never quiz me again.

Take a sh1t on her baps.

Alternatively, leave the toilet seat up

mick.m

Use a sharp blade to make a small incision in the underside of her mattress, somewhere inconspicuous like the corner. Proceed to shove as many fresh vegetables in as possible, but not so many so that she can feel them when sleeping. Sew back up neatly. Moonwalk out the door.

HazDanz

Glue everything that can open and close in the house.

Griffen262

Let me guess, your last facebook status was "Im moving to[insert location with a hidden meaning here]....:mad:

The King of Moo

smugchik wrote: »

Get a tranny mag. (There must be one out called Transexual Weekly or something to that effect) and leave it sticking out from under your matress. That will shock her.

Even better, take out a variety of subscriptions for such magazines in her name, and have them arrive at the house for her new housemate to see. Even if they're discretely packaged, their very discreteness should make it obvious what they are.

cocoshovel

Drench her in petrol and throw a match at her.

fitzgooble

cocoshovel wrote: »

Drench her in petrol and throw a match at her.

Then put her out with a bike chain.

cocoshovel

fitzgooble wrote: »

Then put her out with a bike chain.

I never said the match was alight

Canis Lupus

Slaughter a pig on her bed with a chainsaw.

crazypanda

Put her name on dating sites different to her preference. You won't be there to annoy her anymore so let other people do it. You also won't have to listen to the phone going crazy.

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

ejmaztec

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

That's the thing, she wasn't my mother. Just a very nosy housemate.

You could really piss her off by telling her you're not moving out.

Dangerous Man

Invite a load of Nigerians around to the gaff for drinks.

Son Of A Vidic

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

I can't **** though.

:eek: You mean you have no sex organs whatsoever?

Spread

squod wrote: »

Three large black male prostitutes with extra heavy cocks.

FIVE! And why the prostitute bit?

Dangerous Man

Spread wrote: »

FIVE! And why the prostitute bit?

Cocks as in penises?

ger-h

Get some clingfilm and tightly put it on the toilet making sure there are no creases.
When she sits on the toilet the chances are she wont notice, and she will have a very lovely suprise when she's done!

superrdave

Go home on your last night, drink loads, leave the place in a ****ty mess, vomit in the sink.... actually, vomit in every sink..... then leave, leaving the door unlocked, and give a note of the address to the first bum you meet on the street. Win.

Either that, or **** in her pillow.

Amalgam

Chris P. Bacon wrote: »

Sellotape a fish to the back of the radiator,give it a few days though.

No, too obvious.. a raw chicken fillet or three down the middle of a partition plaster\wall. The gift that takes time to mature..

sunflower27

What did she do that was so bad? Is be nosey it?

God, just move out and forget about it.

Mr Benevolent

Hard luck, woman.

stovelid

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

What should i do to make my last night fun

Make other people miserable.

Go you.

phill106

I think the best thing you can to do annoy her is not move.

jimthemental

Syringe cream into a leather couch. That one can't be fixed. Also when she's in the shower run in and play catch the toaster.

ilovesleep

I gather you didnt get on with your housemate but why do you want to turn around and cause her a night of distress. Can you not move out in peace.

allym

I've no ideas for you but delighted for you that you're finally moving out after reading all your stories about the woman!

ash23

Take the fuses out of all the electrical appliances. And all the bulbs out of the light fittings. And all the batteries out of clocks, remotes etc.

Richard Hillman

Invite members of the traveling community to move into her garden