How to "encourage" my SO to exercise

caterpillar101

Has anyone here been successful in getting your SO to exercise?

My husband is 30, in good health, relatively slim, but not very active....wait, sorry, he plays golf once a week - as he likes to remind me when I ask him about doing more sport. Every now and again he'll do something for a couple of weeks (running, gym) and then lose interest. He works long hours so claims he doesnt have time for sport.

I'm fortunate enough to have a gym at work which I use at lunchtime and dance classes directly after work. I'll be honest, I'm not really willing to start going to the gym together with him in the evenings - my schedule is tight enough as it is. Really, we could only workout together on the weekends.

Any ideas how I can encourage him to do some sport without nagging? My concern is for his health (cardio-vascular) and for his back (which he had trouble with in the past). Plus I get such a kick out of my training, I'd love that for him too. And some muscles wouldn't be unattractive either :-)

nice_guy80

encourage him to train for an event. best way to get motivated.
eg 10k run.
charity run
triathalon.
you might have to do it with him though!!

training will seriously help his golf game!!

or to set a goal and work towards it
eg fit into an old pair of trousers
slim down a shirt size

Hanley

Make it relevant. He’s not going to train because you want him to, he’ll probably only resent your for it even though you have his best interests at heart

Frame it as a way of improving his golf game. The rotational forces of swinging a club puts a big demand on his core and is probably contributing to his back trouble. If he were my client I’d emphasise that by doing core/anti rotation work, and improving lower body strength he’d be able to drive the ball further more consistently, he’d last thru the round better as his playing partners fade away and would feel better during the week cos he wouldn’t have all those niggling pains.

All it takes is like 2x per week really… throw in 10-15 minutes of interval training at the end with targets to achieve/beat and all is good.

You need to find what motivates him, and work off that.

caterpillar101

Thanks guys.
I've signed up for a 10k at the end of June - he might be interested in doing that with me. He's actually quite fit when he does decide to move so it's not an unrealistic goal.

Hanley, I never thought of selling it as a way of improving his golf game - that just might work! I'll broach the subject over the weekend.

d'Oracle

If you thought this thread was about the sacro-illiac joint, you have been spending too much time on boards.

Ouchette

If you had an active holiday booked, like doing the Inca trail or climbing Kilimanjaro or something, he'd have to work on his fitness if he wanted to go.

Might not be an option, of course.

Satanta

nice_guy80 wrote: »

training will seriously help his golf game!!

Very true. Tiger woods bench presses 100Kg.

After good gains in strength over the winter my driving has got alot better too. This would be the holy grain for a regular golfer

howtomake

You say he's done a few bursts of exercise before? What does he actually like doing? No use in signing him up for a 10k if he can't stand running.

Sparkyd2002

I am in my late thirties and had a slight build.never saw the inside of a gym before 35 and never liked running. Now am a regular gym attendee, benching 60 -70 kilos depending on how often im in the gym and love a nice 3-4 mile run 3-4 times a week.Have cut out all the crap food, crisps etc apart from the odd treat For me attending the gym was always put on the long finger for 1 reason, inadequacy! I always thought i'd be like a wimp next to all these beefed up body builders.What got me there in the end was a friend of mine who was so enthusiaistic about the gym and was so convinced i could be in great shape i gave it a go. 2 years on im addicted. So in short i think its just a bit of positive encouragment and a good gym buddy. I still find the gym boring on my own but its great if you have a training buddy to encourage you and egg you on. now i have plenty of muscle, so much so the wife is trying to stop me going to the gym as she hates total body building types. Cant win. LOL

PS and the main point , the golf game improved dramatically!

xalot

This might not go down too well but if he's not overweight and he's not interested in working out then why push it? If you are going on about exercise all the time then maybe it's having the opposite effect on him.

In my experience you dont see results from a gym unless you actually want to be there, the amount of people I see faffing about on the mobiles on the gym and not doing very much....it seems like such a waste of time.

Just my opinion.

SanoVitae

Satanta wrote: »

Tiger woods bench presses 100Kg.

If you think that's impressive, you should see his hip thrusts.....

CiaranC

Why dont you leave him alone? Not everyone is into sport

d'Oracle

CiaranC wrote: »

Why dont you leave him alone? Not everyone is into sport

That question has been addressed in the opening post.

caterpillar101

CiaranC wrote: »

Why dont you leave him alone? Not everyone is into sport

? Someone having a bad day?

I never said anything about going on about exercise, I dont pressure him, I would like if he did something because it would contribute to his health, energy levels, stress management, mood etc. I'm not trying to turn him into something he's not - and I specifically said that I did not want to nag!


Thanks for the positive suggestions and personal experiences shared. Particularly the golf angle would be a good one. He likes running once he gets going as well - he started running again off his own bat a few months ago, but stopped when he got the flu.

Sid_Justice

what does SI mean? Spousal...eh special eh...

Malice

Sid_Justice wrote: »

what does SI mean? Spousal...eh special eh...

It's probably a typo for "SO" as in Significant Other. The 'i' and 'o' keys are next to each other on the keyboard .

caterpillar101

Malice wrote: »

It's probably a typo for "SO" as in Significant Other. The 'i' and 'o' keys are next to each other on the keyboard .

Yep, thanks - tis brain-dead-day when it comes to acronyms. That's what happens when you don't use them often - you dont even notice when you use them wrongly!

Tonto86

CiaranC wrote: »

Why dont you leave him alone? Not everyone is into sport

I gotta agree. If my other half was constantly at me to go to the gym, take up sport and run a 10k I'd feel like a renovation project

shootermacg

Tonto86 wrote: »

I gotta agree. If my other half was constantly at me to go to the gym, take up sport and run a 10k I'd feel like a renovation project

Welcome to marriage my friend!
This may be a generalization but IMO women cant rest, paint the walls, paint them again move a sofa over to the other side of the room, move it back.
I wouldn't mind myself but she has to include me in the process, I'm more of a top down guy looking at her chasing her tail repeatedly wondering if this isn't some sort of insanity shared by all women.
My opinion is if I do nothing long enough, she will eventually want the wall back to the original color and we'll both be happy.

Is nagging the same as bullying? As far as the SO is concerned leave the poor bloke alone, he puts up with your meddling ways already.
What you want isn't necessarily what he wants.

cc87

CiaranC wrote: »

Why dont you leave him alone? Not everyone is into sport

Being healthy isnt too bad though

shootermacg

Sparkyd2002 wrote: »

so much so the wife is trying to stop me going to the gym as she hates total body building types. Cant win. LOL

I get that too.:D


Receptionist: How do you write women so well?
Melvin Udall: I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.

caterpillar101

shootermacg wrote: »

Welcome to marriage my friend!
This may be a generalization but IMO women cant rest, paint the walls, paint them again move a sofa over to the other side of the room, move it back.
I wouldn't mind myself but she has to include me in the process, I'm more of a top down guy looking at her chasing her tail repeatedly wondering if this isn't some sort of insanity shared by all women.
My opinion is if I do nothing long enough, she will eventually want the wall back to the original color and we'll both be happy.

Is nagging the same as bullying? As far as the SO is concerned leave the poor bloke alone, he puts up with your meddling ways already.
What you want isn't necessarily what he wants.

Trying to see the relevance of this to my question?

d'Oracle

caterpillar101 wrote: »

Trying to see the relevance of this to my question?

I wouldn't pay it any mind.
There is most likely a fairly liberal amount of tongue in cheek at play.

itsallaboutheL

Point out every man you see that's in better shape than him, so that he feels like a bag of shit and sorts himself out/leaves.

shootermacg

itsallaboutheL wrote: »

Point out every man you see that's in better shape than him, so that he feels like a bag of shit and sorts himself out/leaves.

Apparently he's not in real bad shape...just not her ideal man, could have more muscles yada yada. Is he happy?:D

beggars_bush

Is she????

Plenty of faster, fitter models around

accensi0n

shootermacg wrote: »

I'm more of a top down guy looking at her

.

shootermacg

accensi0n wrote: »

.

HAHA ya bugger aren't we all!:D

discus

itsallaboutheL wrote: »

Point out every man you see that's in better shape than him, so that he feels like a bag of shit and sorts himself out/leaves.

Who's side are you on? I thoughts you was a dude

Tonto86

Can ya imagine if the situation was reversed?

Husband: Would ya mind gettin a bit fitter? Your not exactly ugly but if ya could do with loosing a bit of the flab!
Wife: :eek:

Next days newspaper: Wife uses bingo wings to beat husband into next week

shootermacg

Tonto86 wrote: »

Can ya imagine if the situation was reversed?

Husband: Would ya mind gettin a bit fitter? Your not exactly ugly but if ya could do with loosing a bit of the flab!
Wife: :eek:

Next days newspaper: Wife uses bingo wings to beat husband into next week

Haha. So true!