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Blind man confused over 'mystery enema'

  • 16-05-2011 8:56pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21


    Veteran police officers have been left dumfounded after a partially-sighted man claimed a woman entered his apartment, gave him an enema, and promptly left. The 53-year-old Californian man answered the door to a woman who claimed she was there to give him an enema.
    As the man had recently undergone intestinal surgery, he assumed the visit was part of his rehabilitation and allowed the woman into his home to perform the procedure.
    The woman took him into the bedroom, had him drop his trousers and lie face down on his bed, before performing the enema in less than two minutes.
    A day later, the man began wondering about his experience and contacted the Sonoma Police Department to report the incident.
    The investigating officer contacted the man's doctor and was told that an enema had not been prescribed, ordered or approved.
    Due to the condition of the man's eyesight, he was unable to offer police a description of the mystery woman and she left no clues of her identity at the scene.
    Sonoma police have now turned the case over to the domestic and sexual assault unit of the Sonoma Sheriff's Office, who have yet to make sense of the incident.


    Read more: http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/863137-blind-man-confused-over-mystery-enema#ixzz1MYEAsX7N


«1

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,813 ✭✭✭themadchef


    Robbed blind isint a fairy story ya know! Bet she really cleaned him out ...........


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,969 ✭✭✭hardCopy


    Sounds like a right pain in the ass


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,243 ✭✭✭LighterGuy


    That ... is .... insane.
    Something is being left out from that story.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭The King of Moo


    He was surprised!? No s**t!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!




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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 ✭✭✭Ghandee


    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,332 ✭✭✭Guill


    If someone walks into your house and asks you to drop the jocks and bend over you should probably ask a few questions!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,618 ✭✭✭baldbear


    Enema? Does that mean she gave him his sight back?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34,418 ✭✭✭✭hondasam


    Ghandee wrote: »
    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?

    anal


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,332 ✭✭✭Guill


    Ghandee wrote: »
    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?


    Bend over and i'll show ya.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,754 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Ghandee wrote: »
    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?

    Warm soapy water up yer arse to clean you out manually. Bet your sorry you asked now.

    As for the "victim"*, I should have asked at the door if she was friend or enema.

    *I say "victim" because people pay good money for this kinda thing...

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    Guill wrote: »
    Bend over and i'll show ya.

    That was even funnier when I saw your location :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Since when do you 'perform' an enema? :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 413 ✭✭The Left Hand Of God


    Ghandee wrote: »
    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?


    You might want to consider leaving the internet.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,754 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Since when do you 'perform' an enema? :confused:

    Probably since you were constipated.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Posts: 6,025 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    [QUOTE=Ikky Poo2;
    As for the "victim"*, I should have asked at the door if she was friend or enema.

    :D:D:D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,879 ✭✭✭ArtyM


    Ghandee wrote: »
    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?
    The first rule of getting an enema is you never talk about getting an enema.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    Since when do you 'perform' an enema? :confused:

    When you do it in a top-hat


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,332 ✭✭✭Guill


    Dean09 wrote: »
    That was even funnier when I saw your location :pac:


    I'm nearly after falling off the couch! Forgot that I was there!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Ikky Poo2 wrote: »
    Probably since you were constipated.

    oh right. yeah I was commenting on the 'perform' verb being used there.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,526 ✭✭✭m@cc@


    The 53-year-old Californian man answered the door to a woman who claimed she was there to give him an enema.

    Enema of the state.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    m@cc@ wrote: »
    Enema of the state.

    Sleeping with the Enema


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,526 ✭✭✭m@cc@


    oh right. yeah I was commenting on the 'perform' verb being used there.

    An enema is a procedure.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34,418 ✭✭✭✭hondasam


    Since when do you 'perform' an enema? :confused:

    what would you say ?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,879 ✭✭✭ArtyM


    And he will probably never see the funny side.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,408 ✭✭✭Captain_Generic


    Sleeping with the Enema

    Enema Strikes Back


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    m@cc@ wrote: »
    An enema is a procedure.

    hmmm, so it is. they lied!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Enema Strikes Back

    The Enema Below


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,408 ✭✭✭Captain_Generic


    The Enema Below

    Enema at the Gates (or door in this case)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 458 ✭✭Craebear


    Return of the enema


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,382 ✭✭✭lastlaugh


    This is old news, it's the turd time I've heard that story this week..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Behind Enema Lines


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,408 ✭✭✭Captain_Generic


    Behind Enema Lines

    *Opens IMDB, searches for 'enemy'*

    Its gonna be a long night :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Public Enema No 1

    :cool:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,939 ✭✭✭ballsymchugh


    this blind fella's name wasn't kfallon looking for a sneaky finger by any chance?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,704 ✭✭✭squod


    Public health nurse, an enema of the state?


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    right to carry on the movie theme..

    The Enema Strikes Back...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,775 ✭✭✭✭kfallon


    I'd just like to distance myself from this story but I would like to say here and now that if the woman who did the 'dirty' is looking in I'm blind and I would like you to come round and perform the same on me but instead of an enema maybe just check the temperature of my ring with your finger!

    That is all!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,408 ✭✭✭Captain_Generic


    right to carry on the movie theme..

    The Enema Strikes Back...

    Someone extremely handsome and charming might have said that already


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,084 ✭✭✭dubtom


    An enema in two minutes,I'm calling 'no ****'. I've never had one but I'm certain it would take more than two minutes to get a pipe up my hole, never mind empty it.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    The Enema Within


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 796 ✭✭✭TheBunk1


    Enyourma


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    TheBunk1 wrote: »
    Enyourma

    I'm sorry but I'm going to have to ask you to leave....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    Dean09 wrote: »
    I'm sorry but I'm going to have to ask you to leave....

    By the back door.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    By the back door.

    Ba dum tsshhh


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,969 ✭✭✭hardCopy


    Dean09 wrote: »
    Ba dum tsshhh

    Bum-bum-splash!


  • Moderators, Regional Midwest Moderators Posts: 11,183 Mod ✭✭✭✭MarkR


    I found the architects of this vile plan right here in Ireland!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,076 ✭✭✭✭bnt


    I wonder whether Michael H Kenyon has moved from Illinois to California? He was the Illinois Enema Bandit, the one that Frank Zappa made (in)famous in song ... :eek:

    You are the type of what the age is searching for, and what it is afraid it has found. I am so glad that you have never done anything, never carved a statue, or painted a picture, or produced anything outside of yourself! Life has been your art. You have set yourself to music. Your days are your sonnets.

    ―Oscar Wilde predicting Social Media, in The Picture of Dorian Gray



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 882 ✭✭✭cdb


    With friends like these, who needs enemas?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,817 ✭✭✭pebbles21


    Ghandee wrote: »
    (Right, I'll ask it first)

    Too lazy to google, but what the fúck is an enema?

    A white American rapper :cool: ya fool !


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