thinking of using escorts

LegacyUser

I havent had sex in years and im very frustrated, is this immoral, illegal, i really think im going to go ahead and visit an escort

Swampy

If you can't be good, be careful.

LegacyUser

escorts wrote: »

I havent had sex in years and im very frustrated, is this immoral, illegal, i really think im going to go ahead and visit an escort

I guarantee it, when you go to an escort, after your fork over a few hundred euros she will have you finished in no time. Then you'll leave the premises and think, "Gee, a **** would have been cheaper."

leggo

I wouldn't recommend this as a solution to your problems. I'm not anti-escorts or anything, but it won't fill the hole you're looking to (unfortunate pun unintended). In fact, I'd imagine it'll only build a reliance on escorts and end up doing you out of thousands of euro in the future because anytime you want sex...you know that you can take the easy route.

Instead, I'd recommend learning how to better yourself and get the women you're looking for. Many might dismiss it, but reading 'The Game' by Neil Strauss will at least show you that you're not the only one who goes through this. And it might give you some tips where you can start working on getting women too.

Johnny Favourite

Go for it, have a ball and be carful.

LighterGuy

notfeckinworthit wrote: »

I guarantee it, when you go to an escort, after your fork over a few hundred euros she will have you finished in no time. Then you'll leave the premises and think, "Gee, a **** would have been cheaper."

best advice you can get on this question op.

tawnyowl

escorts wrote: »

I havent had sex in years and im very frustrated, is this immoral, illegal, i really think im going to go ahead and visit an escort

From your point of view, you might find the experience not what you expected or you might become dependent on it. Either way, it can be expensive.

From her point of view, it may be quite unpleasant (to put it very mildly) - she may have turned to prostitution through desperation and may even be trafficked. This is where ethics and morality come in - what may seem like an easy way to relieve your frustration to you may well be exploiting someone else.

There's also how it might affect future relationships: what if someone you're seeing finds out you've been with escorts? It might make them lose all trust in you.

I don't know the details of legality, but there was recent discussion that the Labour party is considering changing the laws regarding prostition, making the purchase of sex an offence - you may find yourself in trouble with the law in future.

LegacyUser

It's not illegal to visit an independent escort. It's not illegal in Ireland to pay for sex. There are websites with community forums which have significant information on the legality of escort services in Ireland.

Whether it's immoral is up to your own moral code and your own beliefs. If you find an escort who is independent and has not been trafficed, then it's a matter between two consenting adults so you are not exploiting anybody. Escorts can make significant money, and independent escorts make the choice for themselves and keep the payments for themselves.

I'd say there are probably alternatives, but we all have needs. If an escort can help you meet yours, then you just need to be able to reconcile it to your own moral code.

Ickle Magoo

Leggo, as per the forum charter:

Discussion of Pick-Up-Artists (PUA) methods and techniques are not allowed on this forum.

If you haven't already done so, please take the time to read the [URL=" http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056181484"]forum rules[/URL] in the charter.

Many thanks.

LegacyUser

OP I know the feeling, I've considered this myself after going months without sex so can only imagine your frustration after years. I've never gone through with it though as I really don't like the idea of having sex with a woman who is not really interested in having sex with me. For some men they couldn't care less and are only thinking of their own enjoyment but for me a big turn on is knowing the woman is actually turned on my having sex with me. I'd just feel very silly especially afterwards. And in terms of how expensive escorts are from what I have heard I definitely could not justify parting with a few hundred quid for a half hour of fun. I mean if your gonna do that, just go on a holiday somewhere and you'll probably have sex legit that way. Don't throw your money at these girls with their extorted prices. Save up, go on a holiday with friends, have fun and try meet some girls. If not, well I'm sure you will be able to find some women willing to offer such services for money at a cheaper cost than you will here. I wouldn't feel as weird about paying for sex on a holiday as I would somewhere in this country. It would just seem a bit weird. And don't forget, sex is a drug and you'll always want more. Going to escorts regularly could be a very expensive habit.

LegacyUser

I don't know you, but judging by the fact you've stated that you have gone years without being intimate with a woman, you're more than likely in seek of acknowledgment and acceptance from one. Going to an escort will not give you the slightest bit of either of these things, and will leave you feeling very down afterwards. However, it will just as likely make your sexual frustration vanish. And trust me I know how deep this issue goes and how much of a burden it can be on your life.

So you have to decide for yourself whether you think the positives I mentioned would outweigh the negatives for you. If you think they would, then go for it. It can be a very beneficial thing to do. Take it from someone who's probably a lot older than yourself and has been there and done that.

If you were anything like I was, 80-100 euro out of pocket is nothing compared to the mental stress, whatever you earn. So I wouldn't consider the price an issue. You wont "become addicted" because you will suffer from the aftermath of feeling bad afterwards, which wont be worth the sexual gratification you will not need in such close proximity to your last visit. I don't see any moral issue, as the high majority of escorts in Ireland are independent. And the small chance of somehow contributing to the practice of trafficking just isn't enough to make it an issue either.

LegacyUser

OP I'm a 22 year old virgin and feel like I'm missing out on a vital life experience. At this stage I just want to know what its like. I'm holding out for love, but it seems no-one is willing to love me. I'm a kind sensitive sort who writes (bad) poetry but haven't actually left the friend zone.

I've been debating it in my head for 9 months. If I haven't lost my virginity by 24 then I'm going to do it.

People will moralise to you about this but chances are they have confidence and can blag any girl they want. They don't understand what its like not to be either good lucking or confident, so naturally they look down at you and judge you.

LegacyUser

escorts wrote: »

I havent had sex in years and im very frustrated, is this immoral, illegal, i really think im going to go ahead and visit an escort

if its just sex you want then id say go ahead, just be aware its just sex, your not going to
get any emotional connection or any of the extras you get with a relationship

dont worry about human trafficing or any of that.Just dont go picking up something off the street. go to a proper independant escort, they work for themselves from nice apts and are very discret too.

LegacyUser

frustrated too,

Where you say people who have 'confidence' can blag any girl they want, thats not the case, well for a lucky few it is but for the vast majority having 'confidence' just means they are more willing to approach women and hence more success.

I believe that you are not as undesirable as you seem and it is mainly a confidence issue. I realised this earlier than you however as I'm still only 18 and managed to just pluck up the courage (don't ask me how) to just go up to girls and start talking to them with reasonable success. What you do have to do is build up a good base of self confidence and comfort in your self image. Find clothes you look good in, a hairstyle that suits, maybe go to the gym and you will find yourself more at ease with yourself. Then go and approach women in bars,nightclubs and talk to them for a while and see how things go.

Hope I helped!

IrishEyes19

frustratedtoo wrote: »

OP I'm a 22 year old virgin and feel like I'm missing out on a vital life experience. At this stage I just want to know what its like. I'm holding out for love, but it seems no-one is willing to love me. I'm a kind sensitive sort who writes (bad) poetry but haven't actually left the friend zone.

I've been debating it in my head for 9 months. If I haven't lost my virginity by 24 then I'm going to do it.

People will moralise to you about this but chances are they have confidence and can blag any girl they want. They don't understand what its like not to be either good lucking or confident, so naturally they look down at you and judge you.

OP and Frustratedtoo, the one thing that is making you feel bad and odd for not having had sex in some time is society. Everyone today is conditioned to believe if you havent achieved certain things by a certain age, that there is something wrong with you. That isn't the case. And honestly for people who are using the "moral" card here, they honestly mean well. Only because after you fork out the money for escorts, you still have to spend another night at home and restart the process over and over again. Empty sex is empty sex, it wont fufill what either of you are looking for.

People are all different,and forget this notion about confident and stunning men "bagging any girl they want," No girl wants to be bagged :rolleyes: I wont lie and say confident men dont have an appeal, but shy men can be just as compelling and interesting as long as they are decent, polite ect. Ive seen many confident attractive men so arrogant and in love with themselves on nights out, that girls have turned away either bored or disgusted.

And like Ive said before in other posts, a guy just has to say hello, most decent girls will answer back in some form, for the girls who are rude or dismissive, let them off and be glad of it, who wants a sour faced person anyway, but there will be girls who will respond if you just take the inititive to walk over and say hello and smile. I promise you, thats all it takes and you will be rejected sometimes and sometimes you wont. But if you hold back forever with the fear that you are too shy and not confident, you will be asking why is this happening to me all of your life.

Other social outlets are much better and a less expensive outlet to bat. Outlets like sports clubs, book clubs, theres even a meetup section on boards.ie for different areas that you could get involved in, everyone is welcome. The point is, I think you should do yourself a favour and allow yourself to develop a real relationship that will lead to proper sex, and even if its just something casual you want for the time being, many women only want that too.

I'm not advocating any moral grounds on this, but I think you deserve better dont you think so yourself? Both of your posts here are littered with negative views of yourselves and I would bet a lot of money that only you both can see those negative aspects. Take the time now to be happy and try and see some positivity in your own character. take care of yourself.

@ Fustratedtoo, at age 22, love will never be as clear in my opinion. Most people that age hardly know where their life is going never mind the person they want to marry. At 22, you need to prioritise and realise that right now, nothing will be stable for a long time. Love will happen when it happens, but dont go looking for it, let it come along when the time is right. You have plenty of time to find it.

LegacyUser

Personally, I would dismiss the above advice for the reason that the poster is not going to be able to relate to your situation.

If you want to have legitimate sex or a relationship you WILL have to somehow become that confident guy that can talk non-stop for long periods at a time. These character traits are the most attractive things to a female and are possessed to by enough men to go around. So why would a woman settle for less? Anyone who suffers from severe confidence issues and not being good-looking will know that this seems an impossible feat. Women will look at you a certain way initially that will take a lot to overcome. Something your confidence will not allow you to do so.

Prostitution will numb you and take away the innocent part of you that is looking for love. If you value that part of you, stay away from them. If you want rid of it, then go for it, it could save you years, if not your whole life's worth of anguish, but I warn you it will be replaced with a sense of numbness.

I am a 33 year old that is yet to have sex without paying for it. You can take that as either a reason to discredit my opinion or trust it. It's up to you but at the end of the day I think I can relate to your situation better than any female telling you to "join a spots club" or 'just be confident'. Good luck.

IrishEyes19

lyricalsam wrote: »

Personally, I would dismiss the above advice for the reason that the poster is not going to be able to relate to your situation.

If you want to have legitimate sex or a relationship you WILL have to somehow become that confident guy that can talk non-stop for long periods at a time. These character traits are the most attractive things to a female and are possessed to by enough men to go around. So why would a woman settle for less? Anyone who suffers from severe confidence issues and not being good-looking will know that this seems an impossible feat. Women will look at you a certain way initially that will take a lot to overcome. Something your confidence will not allow you to do so.

Prostitution will numb you and take away the innocent part of you that is looking for love. If you value that part of you, stay away from them. If you want rid of it, then go for it, it could save you years, if not your whole life's worth of anguish, but I warn you it will be replaced with a sense of numbness.

I am a 33 year old that is yet to have sex without paying for it. You can take that as either a reason to discredit my opinion or trust it. It's up to you but at the end of the day I think I can relate to your situation better than any female telling you to "join a spots club" or 'just be confident'. Good luck.

Fair point, lyricalsam, I cant relate but thanks for telling everyone this because you know me so well!!!!!!! :rolleyes: not.

My point for the OP, was to get across that escorts and prostitution isnt the answer, same point as you.
And I didnt say just be confident or join a sports club, I suggested them as other outlets to meet people, my main point was to get help to find some confidence himself. There was no need to dismiss or be so rude. Female opinions are welcome here as well. And its no harm getting a balanced opinion.

And I would have thought the OP would appreciate female advice, didnt realise it was a closed thread for males who were virgins though. apologies. :rolleyes: :eek:

@OP, my advice was just intended to show you, theres other options. Was just trying to advise.

Elle Collins

lyricalsam wrote: »

I am a 33 year old that is yet to have sex without paying for it. You can take that as either a reason to discredit my opinion or trust it.

I would take that as a reason to stay the hell out of prostitution OP. It clearly renders some men incapable of forming relationships, which is obviously a seriously undesirable thing.

seamus

lyricalsam wrote: »

I am a 33 year old that is yet to have sex without paying for it. You can take that as either a reason to discredit my opinion or trust it.

Neither discredit or trust it, but your experience with women thus far has clearly tarnished your opinion.

Despite what sit coms and rom coms and PUAs and other assorted snake oil salesmen would have you believe, relationships between men and women are not games. It's not a matter of fitting all the pieces in the right slots or saying some magic words and then you're guaranteed to attract the opposite sex.

Certain aspects help, but only insofar as actually meeting other members of the opposite sex. If you're not confident, then you're less likely to be out with new people and less likely to talk to people you don't know, which quite obviously makes it difficult to meet someone.

Your assertion that you have to be a talker who goes on for hours otherwise women aren't interested, is rubbish. Most people can tell you that.

Legalities aside, if the OP is having doubts about going ahead with this, then that's an indicator that he's probably not ready for it. As has been said, there's a very real chance that you'll come away feeling like you've just had a very expensive ****.

santana75

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Leggo, as per the forum charter:



If you haven't already done so, please take the time to read the forum rules in the charter.

Many thanks.

I don't mean to stray off topic here but why is the discussion of PUA forbidden?
I've read Neil Strauss' book and other books on the topic of how to be successful with women and I can honestly say that its good stuff. Its respectful to women so I dont see what the problem is with letting men know about a resource that could help them out.
Is the problem related to free advertising for someones book or website? If it is then it should be the same rule for everybody as I've seen many book and website recomendations on PI that are allowed. Like I said I've read Neill Strauss' book and also David DeAngelo's material aswell and I found both to be very insightful but also respectful to women.

fghijkl

Its respectful to women so I dont see what the problem is with letting men know about a resource that could help them out.

How can tricking a woman into dating/sleeping with you be respectful?

Resource which can help them out? please....Women are not machines which come with a manual, women are not objects to be won.
If you treat a woman as an equal and not as some complicated being that needs an instruction booklet you won't have any problems.:rolleyes:

I've read Neil Strauss' book and other books on the topic of how to be successful with women and I can honestly say that its good stuff.

Even the language you use here is degrading....successful...pfft...the majority of women know about PUA sh**e and see it as pathetic.

I havent had sex in years and im very frustrated, is this immoral, illegal, i really think im going to go ahead and visit an escort

OP i think it depends on why you haven't had sex in years? It isn't too hard for most people to go out and find a man/women to have a One night stand with, if that's all your after? It may seem like an obvious question but have you actively gone out on the pull and looked for a ONS?

Also you really need to consider how visiting an escort would effect you?

Are you one of those people who attach emotion to sex?
Can you handle sex which is just sex for the sake of it?

Can you really start to view (or do you want to view) sex as nothing more than a commodity?

Would you tell a future partner?
Would you be ashamed or feel guilty keeping it from a future partner?

Would you be able to stop at just a one off visit?
The very fact you are asking here if it's immoral would suggest you may seriously regret it if you did visit one.

discus

fghijkl wrote: »

OP i think it depends on why you haven't had sex in years? It isn't too hard for most people to go out and find a man/women to have a One night stand with, if that's all your after? It may seem like an obvious question but have you actively gone out on the pull and looked for a ONS?

Hahaha, ah yeah... just go out and find someone to ride... WHY DIDN'T THE OP THINK OF THAT!! :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

If he wants to get a shag off an escort, then fair game. It's probably gonna be a nicer experience than finding some drunk slag in a nightclub, and bringing her home.

fghijkl

Hahaha, ah yeah... just go out and find someone to ride... WHY DIDN'T THE OP THINK OF THAT!!

If he wants to get a shag off an escort, then fair game. It's probably gonna be a nicer experience than finding some drunk slag in a nightclub, and bringing her home.

:rolleyes: Yes a woman who just wants sex must be drunk slag, God forbid that a woman might have a sex drive. What a healthy attitude to women you have...looks like i hit a nerve. :rolleyes:

The OP hasn't given us any info at all about why he hasn't had sex, there could be a myriad of reasons why, maybe if he examined why it would hugely benefit him in the long term, and he wouldn't need to pay for it. Paying for sex is a short term solution to a long term problem.

Ickle Magoo

santana75 warned for off-topic posting. As per the forum charter and basic rules of Boards if you have an issue with moderator direction or forum rules, you take it to PM rather than dragging someone else's thread off topic - especially just to reiterate a breach of charter that got another poster a warning.

discus, as per the forum charter please reply to threads in a civil and well phrased manner.

fghijkl, if you have an issue with a post or poster then please use the report function.

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Many thanks

santana75

fghijkl wrote: »

How can trickinga woman into dating/sleeping with you be respectful?

Resource which can help them out? please....Women are not machines which come with a manual, women are not objects to be won.
If you treat a woman as an equal and not as some complicated being that needs an instruction booklet you won't have any problems.:rolleyes:


Even the language you use here is degrading....successful...pfft...the majority of women know about PUA sh**e and see it as pathetic.

I've got one question for you: Have you actually read Neill Strauss' book or any of David DeAngelo's material?
If the answer is no then you're passing judgement(and boy are you passing judgement) and making comments about something you dont know anything about.

Ickle Magoo

Regardless of what other posters think, PUA methods or proponents are not up for discussion on this forum - final warning.

panda100

Op, I would really reconsider using an escort to relieve your sexual frustration. There is a reason why so few Irish women are escorts, and the majority come from economically deprived regions such as Eastern Europe, South America and China. Its a job that only the real desperate for cash will do. I know some men might get turned on by that fact, but If you go down the escort route I think it will begin a unhealthy attitude to both women and sex.

We all get sexually frustrated sometimes, but paying to use someone's body to get your fill is not the answer. How about spending the €150 on new clothes or a haircut, or doing something that makes you feel really good and gives you confidence again.
Have you tried online dating?

LegacyUser

Some seriously judgemental stuff in here I have to say.

OP - I have used and continue to use the services of escorts and have always found the experience enjoyable and fulfilling. Sex with an escort is in my experience not as good as making love with a cherished partner but at times I have found myself single and feeling ' frustrated ' , in these circumstances escorts have provided a great solution.

To clear up a few myths/propaganda about the escort scene - most escorts are independent and have not been trafficked ( contrary to the propaganda peddled by certain church-based charities ) , escorts are not filthy , drug-riddled wrecks - quite the contrary in fact , all the escorts I have met have been charming , beautiful and generous women. I suspect that some of the more negative posts in this thread are from women who I have to say I don't believe really understand men when it comes to the subject of a strong yet unsatisfied sex drive ( sorry ladies ).

There are a few good sites where not only can you view an escorts picture and profile you can also read reviews posted by previous clients , the key to a good experience is research and lots of it.

Sex with an escort is a business transaction between 2 consenting adults in private and certainly nothing to be ashamed or guilty about. It is true that were you to develop a ' habit ' then it would prove a very expensive one but once you keep your feet on the ground you will be fine. Always treat an escort with utmost respect and you will be rewarded for it.

If you do decide to see an escort then I hope you will enjoy the experience as much as I have.
Good luck !

LegacyUser

OP I agree with escort user's post. There's nothing wrong with paying for the services of an escort! I'm 33 and have had several relationships, in between them when I've had the urge to get laid and didn't feel like heading out I've used escorts. It took a bit of research and a bit of trial and error to be able to judge by an escort's profile whether she's right for you. In terms of an emotional attachment there is none, I'd have it in the same category as a one night stand but with less drink involved! The escorts I've seen are independent and in terms of personality are a cross section of society. Some are very chatty, open and happy to do what they do, others are quieter and some are simply in it for the money - avoid if possible! Also you'll find that some of these women became escorts in their 30s or 40s of their own free will. Like anything else in life though, you need to be prepared to walk away if you feel something isn't right or the escort you're visiting is not the one on the profile. It happens and some "independent" escorts are not actually independent but are working with an agency, if I get that impression I leave.

As for the bull spouted by some of the posters here, I've never felt "bad" after being with an escort. The first couple of times there was certainly a thrill of doing something against what would be considered a societal norm i.e. paying for sex but that's part of the experience. I've been going to escorts once every few months for the last 4 years or so when I've been single. The escorts insist on using protection but just to be on the safe side I have an STI checkup once every 6 months and so far so good. So hopefully OP you'll see that while relationships and love are infinitely more preferable to visiting escorts, there's nothing wrong with doing so once you're responsible and aware that emotions don't really come into it. Hope this helps!

RandomnoobIII

go on my son, give her a good ragging for your moneys worth

<snip>

Ickle Magoo

RandomnoobIII infracted.

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Chucky the tree

panda100 wrote: »

Op, I would really reconsider using an escort to relieve your sexual frustration. There is a reason why so few Irish women are escorts, and the majority come from economically deprived regions such as Eastern Europe, South America and China. Its a job that only the real desperate for cash will do. I know some men might get turned on by that fact, but If you go down the escort route I think it will begin a unhealthy attitude to both women and sex.

We all get sexually frustrated sometimes, but paying to use someone's body to get your fill is not the answer. How about spending the €150 on new clothes or a haircut, or doing something that makes you feel really good and gives you confidence again.
Have you tried online dating?

Maybe peoples attitudes towards escorts is what puts Irish people off doing it? Fear of being caught and shunned by people who think only someone who is desperate for cash would be an escort.

OP only you can decide if using an escort is worth it or morally right or not. Other people with wild generalizations probably aren't the best people to listen too.

busyliving

Well I lost my virginity with a prostitution and I never felt so wrong...it was the worst possible feeling. This happened when I was 20

And the second time I’d had sex was when I was nearly 23, and i had quite a bit of it before coming to Australia and it was so much better.

I think paying for it really devalues the whole experience in my opinion, but each to their own and I’m also one of those people who think prostitution should be legalised and regulated in order for tax and health benefits

greengiant09

i think if you really want to, you should op. i don't really think it's that big of a deal so long as you stay safe.

i know exactly where you're coming from, i am a male and have a high sex drive. i really get angry and frustrated when i haven't had sex in a while. tbh, i think i really need it on an almost daily basis.

i really hate it when people go banging on about how you shouldn't do this. don't get me wrong, i think it is immoral, i much rather have sex without paying for it but for some people it can be very, very hard to get. people can come on here giving advice about how to get it which is very good but it can be very hard and time consuming to implement this advice.

otto_26

Irisheyes19 That was a very nice comment some man is going to very happy in the future.

Ickle Magoo

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