Physical attraction as you age. Do men have it better?

AskMyChocolate

Fortunately, I'm as ugly now as I ever was, so I have had the time to study this dispassionately.

But blokes don't seem to get any worse looking. In fact, in an awful lot of cases, I've seen ugly lads become "distinguished" looking.

Whereas, a girl tends to look her best in her early twenties.

Anybody else noticed this?

*Btw, I haven't become any more or less successful, so let's try to keep this OT people* :pac:

Spunge

Generally it would be true but obviously there are some exceptions

Spore

Just look at Cher*













*pukes up intestines

pmurphy00

a good female friend always says that
girls peak at 21 men at 40..:eek:
i always look at the wdding photos in the paper
and the number af babes with ugly guys always amazes me

im better looking at 28 than ive ever been..somehow..
im a guy..doubt the same is true for many girls..

Sibylla

Men do have it better unfortunately women lose their looks big time after 35 although I have seen some remarkable exceptions, Men age better and generally improve. For women their peak is probably 18-30. It all depends on how well people look after themselves, women who do usually look great as they get older.

Jumpy

Fish goes bad pretty quickly. Whereas salami keeps for aaaages.

pmurphy00

alot of men let themselves go with beer and crisps in their 20s
and then @30-40 hit the gym and become handsome again
beause they've kids and want a good example..
i think it easier for men to age slowly..
if their lifestyle is good if its ****e they get hacked quick!

Swampy

This is true about men. However women can keep their looks if they look after themselves properly. Case in point... Doctor Quinn Medicine Woman ( can't remember her name right now )

plenty of very fit 40+'s out there also.

amazingemmet

I'd say having seen a lot of women keep their looks into 40's and fifties The key is exercise and good diet. Some examples:

late forties in these photos: http://www.melissamerran.com/gallery_02.htm

differnt person late forties: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrXJxKCBVz4&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL

TaraFoxglove

In somes cases, men get better looking with age, but not always. Any man thinking he is improving like a fine wine whilst cultivating early middle age spread is kidding himself.

And some men do, some men don't in general. It's not a given unfortunately.

eco2live

Its all diet and exercise. I looked 10x better when I was 21 then I am now at 35. Drink and junk food has taken its toll. I even had trouble getting back into the country at 29 when I was told I was not the same person as in the picture.

I have lost 1.5 stone since last sept and have another 3 stone to lose before I can mature like a fine wine as opposed to a can of pizz.

Another example:

Val Kilmer

http://www.kingofpeople.com/7902/val-kilmer-avantaprs/

TaraFoxglove

eco2live wrote: »

Another example:

Val Kilmer

http://www.kingofpeople.com/7902/val-kilmer-avantaprs/

He's revolting. Urgh!

Spunge

TaraFoxglove wrote: »

He's revolting. Urgh!

Ah c'mon he's in his fifties now

TaraFoxglove

Spunge wrote: »

Ah c'mon he's in his fifties now

Still revolting! And if men get better with age, being in his 50s shouldn't matter, should it?

opinion guy

It's all diet and exercise. If you doubt that just look at French womean who generally age fantastically compared to other nations. Its all that mediterranean lifestyle business

eco2live

Yep diet and exercise. It used to be the case that women aged worse then men but that is because they had a rake of kids and spent a lot of time at home.

Now that things are more even the following link is the results:

http://www.moviesnobs.net/40-hottest-women-over-40/2/

Men and women let themselves go. I think that after having a couple of kids when a women lets herself go a bit it is hard to get back to your best. Not their fault. Its just life. I am a man and I let myself go especially when the kids came along. I see loads of older women in the gym and they look better then men their age.

ilovesleep

Sibylla wrote: »

Men do have it better unfortunately women lose their looks big time after 35 although I have seen some remarkable exceptions, Men age better and generally improve. For women their peak is probably 18-30. It all depends on how well people look after themselves, women who do usually look great as they get older.

This thread is not very much of a good read. I'm a woman.
Starts doing 100 sit ups.....

pookie82

There's more than the hard fact of physical ageing at play here.

Society deems it unnattractive for a woman to go grey or wrinkly with time. For men, grey hair and lines tend to be perceived as "distinguished". It's another example of society being hard on women and what's expected of them.

Women tend to reach the end of their reproductive cycle in their forties, so it's quite natural for nature to determine that they lose any essential attractive qualities (in general) as they no longer need to attract a mate (obviously women can override this with conscious effort, but from nature's point of view, they're used goods).

Men can reproduce pretty much until they die, so it makes sense for them to be attractive to women even as they age.

I think we need to give women a break, like in all other areas of life. Look at Helen Mirren. She's grey, lined, and certainly not skinny, but I think she's one of the hottest women I know. It's about class and elegance and also accepting age gracefully and not plumping yourself up with fillers and face lifts.

Personally I think that I look better now (at 28) than I ever did at 21, but back then I was still skinny and a bit gawky with no sense of style or confidence.

I definitely believe that as we age, women in particular tend to get more comfortable with their looks, which is a great thing. I'm far happier with myself now as a 28 year old than i was as an 18 year old, despite now being a size 12 as opposed to a size 8 like i was then. I know how to maximise my assets and hide my flaws and have come to accept how I look and who I am.

So yes, in general, men DO age better than women, probably because there's a biological need for them to. But in this day and age it's perfectly attainable to fight the course of ageing (naturally) with diet and exercise. But social perception of what's attractive needs to alter also.

Edited to add pic of amazing Helen Mirren:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/07/16/article-1035510-01F6B66400000578-643_468x815.jpg

Snakeblood

AskMyChocolate wrote: »

Fortunately, I'm as ugly now as I ever was, so I have had the time to study this dispassionately.

But blokes don't seem to get any worse looking. In fact, in an awful lot of cases, I've seen ugly lads become "distinguished" looking.

Whereas, a girl tends to look her best in her early twenties.

Anybody else noticed this?

*Btw, I haven't become any more or less successful, so let's try to keep this OT people* :pac:

I wouldn't say I got better looking. Fatter, maybe. But just in general, marks of age tend to be more accepted among men than women. God forbid a woman go grey, for example. Also, women have more potential for obvious droop. Luckily my droop isn't obvious until cash has already changed hands.

MiniSquish

I'm only 22 so I can't really comment on it from a personal side, however from looking at pictures of my mother on her wedding day (23) I think she looks way better now (45). Granted back then she's a tiny bit skinnier but she has still maintained her figure well and even my maternal grandmother looks well for her age (74), she still dyes her hair, curls it every day and wears makeup. Whereas my paternal grandmother has let her hair go grey, from her 20's my Dad tells me. Personally I'm too vain I think to let my hair go grey, especially from such a young age.

I think it really does just depend on the person, a few years back my mother was like a typical mothery kind of woman and since she's started working in a clothes shop and that where ya have to look good to help sell the clothes I think she looks much better.

Table Top Joe

eco2live wrote: »

Yep diet and exercise. It used to be the case that women aged worse then men but that is because they had a rake of kids and spent a lot of time at home.

Now that things are more even the following link is the results:

http://www.moviesnobs.net/40-hottest-women-over-40/2/

Men and women let themselves go. I think that after having a couple of kids when a women lets herself go a bit it is hard to get back to your best. Not their fault. Its just life. I am a man and I let myself go especially when the kids came along. I see loads of older women in the gym and they look better then men their age.

Wow theres some seriously hot women in that link......but theyre all very wealthy,wonder if they had any work done?(not knocking it btw,why not if it looks good?)



Guys have it ten times easier it has to be said,i look a lot better now at 30 than i did at 20,if a half decent looking guy looks after himself he can look good well into his 50s......even later for some


Women have the kiddies(though having said that i know plenty of women who have kids and they look better than most women who havent so im not sure if you can say having a baby = out of shape for life,sensitive topic i know but id be interested to know what some of you mothers think of it),sun damage(men have tougher skin and i know some girls who use baby oil for a better tan.......baby oil ffs!! theyre gonna regret that in the coming years)younger women tend to smoke more than men too thats another battering the skin takes,a big battering actually,i know loads of girls who smoke to keep the weight off even though they know its effecting their skin!! wtf? i think they just cant envisage themselves ever being 40 or 50 whatever,i dont get it)




So yeah,i would fall on the look after your inside and it will show on your outside side,speaking for myself and friends of mine i think things change for men about 25,i used to eat mountains of food up until then and didnt put on a pound(and believe me it wasnt the healthiest either)from 25 on though i felt different,could feel myself getting flabbier,i know lots of guys who felt the ol metabolism slowing down then,i eat super healthy now and get plenty of exercise and it shows



Both men and women here(generally)eat awful crap though,however,my friends younger brother and all his buddies are very health conscious,they nearly all workout too,its a huge improvement on the Irish male imo,they seem to be far more aware of their health than younger women....from what i see anyway



So there you go,eat well and exercise(and dont use bloody baby oil!) and you wont look like crap by the time your 30 regardless of gender,youll also have more energy,less health problems,much better moods.....i just wish i started healthy eating much sooner than i did(about 28 when i finally did)

Alwayson

I think a lot of this is relative. Men in their twenties are mainly attracted to women of a similar age or younger. In their 20's they are attracted to women in their 20's and in their 30's they are attracted to women in their 20's and 30's. As men get older the catchment area increases! This is just a fact of nature, it doesn't mean that men become more attractive. I am 50 and am attracted (and evidently attractive to) women in their 20's, 30's, 40's and 50's. I never had it so good! This process is not as common the other way round i.e. men in their 20's dating women in their 50's. However I now find myself making a conscious decision not to encourage women in their 20's as I am getting conscious of the age gap. This may be something to do with the fact that my daughter will be 20 this year and the boot could soon be on the other foot. This age consciousness is at its worst when I am with my 50 year old friend and her 25 year old daughter and I don't know where to look. I would swear I have sensed a subconscious rivalry between them in this situation. But maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part.

PS1 If you know anyone who can take a 25 year old supermodel type who prefers older men and keeps asking me for a date off my hands please let me know.
PS2 what I lack in looks I more than make up for in ego :-)

Table Top Joe

pookie82 wrote: »

There's more than the hard fact of physical ageing at play here.

Society deems it unnattractive for a woman to go grey or wrinkly with time. For men, grey hair and lines tend to be perceived as "distinguished". It's another example of society being hard on women and what's expected of them.

Women tend to reach the end of their reproductive cycle in their forties, so it's quite natural for nature to determine that they lose any essential attractive qualities (in general) as they no longer need to attract a mate (obviously women can override this with conscious effort, but from nature's point of view, they're used goods).

Men can reproduce pretty much until they die, so it makes sense for them to be attractive to women even as they age.

I think we need to give women a break, like in all other areas of life. Look at Helen Mirren. She's grey, lined, and certainly not skinny, but I think she's one of the hottest women I know. It's about class and elegance and also accepting age gracefully and not plumping yourself up with fillers and face lifts.

Personally I think that I look better now (at 28) than I ever did at 21, but back then I was still skinny and a bit gawky with no sense of style or confidence.

I definitely believe that as we age, women in particular tend to get more comfortable with their looks, which is a great thing. I'm far happier with myself now as a 28 year old than i was as an 18 year old, despite now being a size 12 as opposed to a size 8 like i was then. I know how to maximise my assets and hide my flaws and have come to accept how I look and who I am.

So yes, in general, men DO age better than women, probably because there's a biological need for them to. But in this day and age it's perfectly attainable to fight the course of ageing (naturally) with diet and exercise. But social perception of what's attractive needs to alter also.

Edited to add pic of amazing Helen Mirren:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/07/16/article-1035510-01F6B66400000578-643_468x815.jpg

It isnt fair but your point on nature is bang on,i dont agree so much with blaming society though,i thought your point on nature cancelled that out,society is how it is regarding appearance because of nature,its directly related,sexual attractiveness(more or less)comes down to looking like a good mate to have children with,no matter how good looking a women is at 50-odd shell never be able to compete with a younger women....whereas men could of course



And good God is Helen Mirren the only woman on planet earth at her age who looks good??? shes the only one i ever see,its only a matter of time before her name comes up whenever this kind of discussion comes up......not having a go or anything,shes obviously a rare breed but there must be others

mrsdewinter

Table Top Joe wrote: »

Good God is Helen Mirren the only woman on planet earth at her age who looks good??? shes the only one i ever see,its only a matter of time before her name comes up whenever this kind of discussion comes up......not having a go or anything,shes obviously a rare breed but there must be others

Well, I liked Pookie's general point: that not all of us peak in our early 20s. I think I was more attractive in my late 20s than I was 7 or 8 years before. I certainly got more attention from the opposite sex. And that interest only went up as I aged.

But you're right about Helen Mirren. She's always wheeled out when these debates start. I'm going to nominate the other great Hot Older Woman trump card: Sophia Loren. I saw her in 2009 (when she was aged 73) and she looked amazing...

Ghost Buster

Slightly off topic but.....
I came to a realisation the other night though sharing this realisation with my pregnant wife may have been a little unwise:eek:.
A mans (and possibly a woman's) scope for fancying the opposite sex opens up as he ages. I can now, at 40 oggle women from well preserved 60 ish, think Helen Mirren, right down to sweet sixteen......sweet......:D

.same.

Alwayson wrote: »

. As men get older the catchment area increases! This is just a fact of nature, it doesn't mean that men become more attractive.

Gotta completely agree with this, If you take an average/good looking group of males in their late teens and compare it to the female counterparts the odds are completely stacked in the females favour. You will have exceptions, but generally an 18 year old guy is only realistically in with a shout of shagging 16-19 year old females, while 18 year old girls have guys 17-27 after them, therefore the poor 18 year old guy has to compete with guys in mid 20's. The tide turns very much in the favour of the males from the ages of 23/24 up.
Me and my friends got feck all action in our teens and early 20's and are now all going out with or getting married to women who are younger but wouldn't have looked sideways at us if we were the same age as them.

stupidusername

I dont know that I agree with the 21 thing.i'd say I probably look better now than I did then.but then maybe thats just a feeling of confidence.hmm I would've had slimmer legs and nothing extra around my tummy back then but I probably looked more stick like too. I think you learn as you get older what suits you and how to look your best and how to take care of yourself.well not everyone obviously.

TaraFoxglove

Alwayson wrote: »

I think a lot of this is relative. Men in their twenties are mainly attracted to women of a similar age or younger. In their 20's they are attracted to women in their 20's and in their 30's they are attracted to women in their 20's and 30's. As men get older the catchment area increases! This is just a fact of nature, it doesn't mean that men become more attractive. I am 50 and am attracted (and evidently attractive to) women in their 20's, 30's, 40's and 50's. I never had it so good! This process is not as common the other way round i.e. men in their 20's dating women in their 50's. However I now find myself making a conscious decision not to encourage women in their 20's as I am getting conscious of the age gap. This may be something to do with the fact that my daughter will be 20 this year and the boot could soon be on the other foot. This age consciousness is at its worst when I am with my 50 year old friend and her 25 year old daughter and I don't know where to look. I would swear I have sensed a subconscious rivalry between them in this situation. But maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part.

PS1 If you know anyone who can take a 25 year old supermodel type who prefers older men and keeps asking me for a date off my hands please let me know.
PS2 what I lack in looks I more than make up for in ego :-)

I'm in my late 20s and would personally consider 50s or even 40s too old at this stage, except maybe if the man was exceptional.

Table Top Joe

Ghost Buster wrote: »

think Helen Mirren, right down to sweet sixteen......sweet......:D

See!!

Table Top Joe

mrsdewinter wrote: »

Well, I liked Pookie's general point: that not all of us peak in our early 20s. I think I was more attractive in my late 20s than I was 7 or 8 years before. I certainly got more attention from the opposite sex. And that interest only went up as I aged.

But you're right about Helen Mirren. She's always wheeled out when these debates start. I'm going to nominate the other great Hot Older Woman trump card: Sophia Loren. I saw her in 2009 (when she was aged 73) and she looked amazing...

Oh i agree with looking better in late 20s as opposed to early,certainly true for me,i had a babyface(still do to an extent)which did me no favours growing up,girls thought i was cute....but not in a wanting to shagg my brains out way,more in the way a baby or fluffy animal is cute:D not much good to me


And yes of course Sophia Loren is a beautiful woman,good call;)

orourkeda

pmurphy00 wrote: »

a good female friend always says that
girls peak at 21 men at 40..:eek:
i always look at the wdding photos in the paper
and the number af babes with ugly guys always amazes me

im better looking at 28 than ive ever been..somehow..
im a guy..doubt the same is true for many girls..

Would it be fair to suggest that the opposite is true in terms of sex life.That men peak from their late teens to thei mid twenties while women seem to peak around their mid thirties

pragmatic1

It depends on the person and their lifestyle. e.g. Carol Vorderman was way sexier in her 40s than she was in her 20s. Some women age really well. I'd say in general, the 40 year olds of today look much younger than the 40 year olds of the past.

pmurphy00

sexually id say ure right..
men peak young sex wise
alot of young girls are hopless in bed
men have the advantage of just having to keep it u n hard!
ive not yet had the pleasure of an older woman..
must get to work on that..

Dravokivich

ilovesleep wrote: »

This thread is not very much of a good read. I'm a woman.
Starts doing 100 sit ups.....

Situps don't burn the fat around a belly ;P

Azureus

I think theres far too much emphasis placed on the physical number when it comes down to age. I think everyone here would know two people around the same age who look NOTHING like eachother. A woman with no money and 6 kids in her thirties is most likely gonig to look a lot different from a woman whose loaded and never had children at the same age for example.

Spunge

Dravokivich wrote: »

Situps don't burn the fat around a belly ;P

Not True!
I lost over 30 lbs in 6 SECONDS with the Ab King Pro.

Buy Now!

Dudess

Azureus wrote: »

I think theres far too much emphasis placed on the physical number when it comes down to age. I think everyone here would know two people around the same age who look NOTHING like eachother. A woman with no money and 6 kids in her thirties is most likely gonig to look a lot different from a woman whose loaded and never had children at the same age for example.

Exactly. Many people are fucking obsessed with what's on others' birth certs. Doesn't help when a lot of women themselves cave into that sh1te. I personally think my face is nicer now than when I was in my teens - way too gaunt and pale back then, I totally looked like a Bronte character.
I had a better body back then no doubt though, but at least the body is something that can be worked on.

The notion that a woman peaks in her early 20s is nuts - usually only young, clueless kiddies think that though.

Naikon

I think I actually look better than what I use to look like just four years ago. Age ftw!

TaraFoxglove

pragmatic1 wrote: »

I'd say in general, the 40 year olds of today look much younger than the 40 year olds of the past.

I'd agree with this, a much easier life will be kinder to looks.

Look at Afghan girl then and now:

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRez9nxyXVutaIE0uC95l01FnyjCPjTF8F4nzsg2mf3WSxPoCR0&t=1

She's only 30/31 in the second shot - yeesh! That would be down to having quite a hard life.

Look at the Migrant Mother:

http://also.kottke.org/misc/images/migrant-woman.jpg

She was only 32/33 here. Again, a hard life has caused her to look weather-beaten.

Women with a more cushy life wouldn't age so harshly.

Herb Powell

eco2live wrote: »

I see loads of older women in the gym and they look better then men their age.

they'd want to

Dangerous Man

We all change as we get older. Sometimes, just like a caterpillar changes into a butterfly - the change can be dramatic. I know I'm getting better.
Do you want to fuck me? I'd fuck me.

...goodbye horses. ooooooh oooh.

Rds1989

Table Top Joe wrote: »

Oh i agree with looking better in late 20s as opposed to early,certainly true for me,i had a babyface(still do to an extent)which did me no favours growing up,girls thought i was cute....but not in a wanting to shagg my brains out way,more in the way a baby or fluffy animal is cute:D not much good to me


And yes of course Sophia Loren is a beautiful woman,good call;)

Well im 21 and have a babyface and have been called "cute" so this is pretty encouraging

Salty

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned the role of genetics here yet. If your parents have aged well, chances are you will too, as long as you don't completely fall of the wagon.:P

I'm only 18, but my parents look much younger than their years. My mum looks the same as she did when she got married (at 22), save for being 2 sizes bigger after having 4 kids (at 41). She has no wrinkles and dresses very well. My dad is in his fifties and hasn't aged at all, and is fitter than he was when myself and the siblings were younger.

Obviously, if I turned into a smoking, alcoholic, sun-addicted glutton, and stayed like that for the next 30 years, I wouldn't age half as gracefully, but as long as the maintenance is kept up, it should be grand.:P

TaraFoxglove

_meehan_ wrote: »

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned the role of genetics here yet. If your parents have aged well, chances are you will too, as long as you don't completely fall of the wagon.:P

I'm only 18, but my parents look much younger than their years. My mum looks the same as she did when she got married (at 22), save for being 2 sizes bigger after having 4 kids (at 41). She has no wrinkles and dresses very well. My dad is in his fifties and hasn't aged at all, and is fitter than he was when myself and the siblings were younger.

Obviously, if I turned into a smoking, alcoholic, sun-addicted glutton, and stayed like that for the next 30 years, I wouldn't age half as gracefully, but as long as the maintenance is kept up, it should be grand.:P

Thing is, though, you can often take after relations other than your parents such as aunts and uncles so look at them too, especially if you share physical characteristics with one of them. You might not age the same as your parents, and lifestyle will play a role too.

Salty

TaraFoxglove wrote: »

Thing is, though, you can often take after relations other than your parents such as aunts and uncles so look at them too, especially if you share physical characteristics with one of them. You might not age the same as your parents, and lifestyle will play a role too.

Yeah, I know plenty of people who are more like their aunts/uncles and cousins than their own siblings and parents.

On my dad's side, my aunt and uncle are the same ageing-wise as my dad. My mum is the oldest in her family, and has 4 younger brothers, all of whom look very young for their ages. One of them, though, has fared worse than the others due to a bereavement that occurred last year (baby died) so that definitely took its toll. Overall, the genes are pretty good.

TaraFoxglove

_meehan_ wrote: »

One of them, though, has fared worse than the others due to a bereavement that occurred last year (baby died) so that definitely took its toll.

Yeah, it's amazing how a stressful life event can age someone, it can be quite shocking!

Stained Class

As a 42 year old bloke, I have more experiance on the ageing process than most on AH.

To tell the truth, I look less bad than I did 20 years ago.

For fellas, if you keep the weight off & keep your hair you're on to a winner.

It's all in the genes really.

Class Sr is fast approaching 77 & looks like he's in his 50s.

TaraFoxglove

Stained Class wrote: »

As a 42 year old bloke, I have more experiance on the ageing process than most on AH.

To tell the truth, I look less bad than I did 20 years ago.

For fellas, if you keep the weight off & keep your hair you're on to a winner.

It's all in the genes really.

Class Sr is fast approaching 77 & looks like he's in his 50s.

For women, striking a balance in weight between gaunt and plump is also a winner!

But seriously, facially some men improve, some dis-improve, even if they remain trim.

ForeverYoung90

Stained Class wrote: »

As a 42 year old bloke, I have more experiance on the ageing process than most on AH.

To tell the truth, I look less bad than I did 20 years ago.

For fellas, if you keep the weight off & keep your hair you're on to a winner.

It's all in the genes really.

Class Sr is fast approaching 77 & looks like he's in his 50s.

TaraFoxglove wrote: »

For women, striking a balance in weight between gaunt and plump is also a winner!

But seriously, facially some men improve, some dis-improve, even if they remain trim.

Just look at Charlie Sheen at 45.Winning:cool:

TaraFoxglove

ForeverYoung90 wrote: »

Just look at Charlie Sheen at 45.Winning:cool:

Heh.

But actually, he has gone really old-looking lately. Which brings us neatly to the point that men with money always age well! :pac:

Stained Class

TaraFoxglove wrote: »

Heh.

But actually, he has gone really old-looking lately. Which brings us neatly to the point that men with money always age well! :pac:

Maybe so.

I don't even have the spare cash to go to the dentist these days.

I drink, smoke, don't exercise much, haven't seen a doctor in years etc.

My Dad did the same.

It's all about genetics, I tell ya!:D