Do you go to Mass?

Penn

Serious question.

Probably barring the obvious baptisms, weddings and funerals, do you ever feel obliged to go to mass? I had to go on Friday night as it was an anniversary mass for my grandmother (who died long before I was even born). I went, but only for my mother (and aunts/uncles to a lesser extent). Didn't go up for communion and just kinda went through the motions, but it was my first time at an actual Mass probably in about a year. Felt really strange as before, I had gone to mass when required but just didn't care. just kept daydreaming or thinking "I'm an atheist... GET ME OUT OF HEEEERRRREEEEE!" This time, I found myself analysing everything which was said, actually listening to the prayers and stuff.

Another instance was two months ago at my nephews Christening. The priest was about to read the prayers of the faithful, when instead he asked if anyone else would like to read them. Unfortunately, because of where I was sitting, it ended up being me. I stood on the altar, an atheist, telling people to give thanks to God etc. Such a strange feeling. Didn't know if I was going to Hell or if everyone else was for listening to an atheist at Mass

Galvasean

Been to a couple of anniversary masses, but have made it very very clear that I have no intention to do so again in future. They seem like gimmicks of the church to boost numbers more than anything.

bigwormbundoran

Once a year for my Grandfathers anniversary, dont go up for communion or any of that shíte when I do have to go. Other than that its just the usual weddings, funerals etc and I tend to try and stand outside whenever at all possible.

Each hour feels like a year when I'm in a church and it gives me a tight clammy feeling as well as light headedness a lot of the time, I used to get abuse of some of the teachers for not heading during the various masses throughout the year back in my secondary school days, it would be the old school ones mostly, but id be damned if anyone elses stupid (to me) beliefs would be forced upon me by a toupee wearing man in his fifties (parish priest, horrible excuse for a human being)

kylith

I've gone to normal mass when my mother has gotten my nieces to guilt me into it. I was offended hugely by the sermon on a purely intellecutal level. My mother has been told that her behaviour in getting the children involved (they're a bit too young to be introduced to the fact that IMO their parents, grandparents and teachers are lying to them) was absolutely disgusting, and has been warned to never, ever ask me to go if it's not for a wedding or funeral.

Mena

I've never been, not once in 37 years.

I deserve a cookie.

Sunnyisland

I dont go anymore except weddings etc,I think i just got lazy and busy so couldn't be bothered,i am always threatening to go but still haven't got around to it,My daughter & granddaughter go every week & seem to enjoy it,My sister has stated going to an other church were she says the preacher & people are much more interactive and friendly and really try and get the children involved..

s3129

I only go for occasions, christenings, Christmas, etc.. and even then I missed Christmas mass a few times. I disagree in having to go to mass it's like 'proving' your faith. I think everyones faith is different and you can chose how you want to celebrate it.

Turtwig

I do, most sundays. In part to avoid a huge conflict that I simply don't want expending the energy on. I think I understand how you feel, it seems a little odd that you don't believe a word of it but I see it as part of Irish culture and I want to understand it more. Most communities in Ireland still centre around the church so it is kinda necessary if you want to keep up to date on the goings on in a community. It's also handy because folks can't accuse you of being close minded. You're still learning and trying to understand the faith.

Penn

Mena wrote: »

I've never been, not once in 37 years.

I deserve a cookie.

Or a communion wafer. You simply must try one. They're heavenly

Turtwig

Barrington wrote: »

Or a communion wafer. You simply must try one. They're heavenly

Not for folks with gluten intolerances.:pac:
And non cannibals.

magicbastarder

last time which wasn't a wedding, christening, or funeral, was 24th dec 1994, and that's cos the lads i was heading down the pub with were going there first.

Doc_Savage

I went for many years with my parents and was an alter boy in the local church when i was in primary school, i made my confirmation and i kept going to mass when i was living with my parents but stopped going once i moved out, since my brother and i have stopped going my mother and father are slowly trailing off too. i still go if i am at home but only as a form of accompanying my parents. i get on well with the parish priest and have had several attempts at having philosophical and political discussions with him. I don't know when i lost faith in religion but it was not an overnight thing, and the more i doubted the more i read and the more i read the more i was sure of my decision. i would say i have been an agnostic from the ages of 12 to 17 and a fairly staunch atheist since i was 18. i still go out of tradition at Christmas.. hypocrite that i am!

i actually said to my mother that i felt like a hypocrite that i was there this year and she asked why? I said because i was an atheist, she said i wasn't, that's not how i was raised! I was so annoyed by her stance that a big argument ensued until she said that i made my confirmation... i stayed silent after this! i haven't approached the subject since and neither has she.

So yes i do still go to mass, but only at the big occasions and as you also mentioned i find myself listening intently and picking holes in the sermons.

Penn

A few times over the past couple of years, if my mother or grandfather needed a lift to mass (on a Saturday night), I'd have to bring them if there was no one else. I'd just sit out in the car though.

What amazed me however was that for a Mass, which was probably around 35 minutes long, there'd still be people arriving 20 minutes in. I mean, most of them were local too. If you're leaving the house that late, just don't bother.

Mark Hamill

Mena wrote: »

I've never been, not once in 37 years.

I deserve a cookie.

There should be something like AA tokens for atheists who stop going to mass :pac::

Canis Lupus

My father just passed away so I've just had more mass in the last week than I've had in the last 10 years.

I tell you what's really ****ing freaky is on the night of the wake having a house full of people doing a decade of the rosary. Now we all know it's a stupid long thing (why why why all the repetition) but when a bunch of people surround a dead body and essentially chant at it, it's a genuinely disturbing experience.

I've been to funerals before but never paid attention, this time round I guess I noticed more and it was laughable watching a priest wandering about throwing 'holy' water and shaking the incense burner etc. I honestly think everyone should go to mass every once in a while simply to remember how bat**** crazy it all is.

Turtwig

Barrington wrote: »

A few times over the past couple of years, if my mother or grandfather needed a lift to mass (on a Saturday night), I'd have to bring them if there was no one else. I'd just sit out in the car though.

What amazed me however was that for a Mass, which was probably around 35 minutes long, there'd still be people arriving 20 minutes in. I mean, most of them were local too. If you're leaving the house that late, just don't bother.

The nearer you are to the church the farther you are from God. In other words, the observation that most mass goers make is that only people of the older generations or those who live far away from the church ever make it on time. Those who are closer or younger tend to be less punctual.

Penn

Malty_T wrote: »

The nearer you are to the church the father you are from God. In Other words, the observation that most mass goers make is that only people of the older generations or those who live far away from the church ever make it on time. Those who are closer or younger tend to be less punctual.

I'd agree with that actually. Good point. I suppose most of the ones who were late were fairly young (less than middle aged anyway)

Turtwig

Canis Lupus wrote: »

My father just passed away so I've just had more mass in the last week than I've had in the last 10 years.

I tell you what's really ****ing freaky is on the night of the wake having a house full of people doing a decade of the rosary. Now we all know it's a stupid long thing (why why why all the repetition) but when a bunch of people surround a dead body and essentially chant at it, it's a genuinely disturbing experience.

I've been to funerals before but never paid attention, this time round I guess I noticed more and it was laughable watching a priest wandering about throwing 'holy' water and shaking the incense burner etc. I honestly think everyone should go to mass every once in a while simply to remember how bat**** crazy it all is.

Sorry for your loss.

Yep that rosary sh1t freaks the bejaysus out of me. I assume it was something like a constant <Holy Idol Name> "PRAY FOR US" with crack, foot stamp or perhaps nothing at all, chant. It actually gave quivers down the spine the last time I experienced it. It's at moments like that that it vividly strikes you that this "tradition" is simply no different than a cult.

darjeeling

Asked "Do you go to mass?", boards.ie said:

No - 85%
Yes - 15%

http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056034332

VW 1

I used to have to go on occasions such as Christmas with the family but when I was about 16 I flat out refused to go much to the mother's disgust. I have only been for funerals since and a couple of remembrance masses. At my Grandads funeral last year I didnt go up for communion and about a week later it was brought up by a family member that they were disgusted by my behaviour at the funeral and I had brought shame on the family, as if having my own beliefs and opinions are unacceptable..Im 22 ffs!!

kylith

I'm going to have to make a stand in about 6 months. My littlist niece is getting chrisened. Her father is an athiest and her mother isn't religious. It seems that it's being done either to ease the passage into school or to appease the maternal grandparents. My brother, the dad, says that he's sick of arguing about it. I suppose that as far as his in-laws are concerned he 'got his way' with a registry office wedding, so now they deserve christened grandchildren. If it were me I'd be asking if they intended to bring her to mass every week, and if not to feck off.

I'll probably sit out the service and turn up for the shindig afterwards.

Zombrex

Barrington wrote: »

This time, I found myself analysing everything which was said, actually listening to the prayers and stuff.

Yeah, its odd. Been to a lot of weddings and unfortunately funerals, but I've only been to a mass 2 times in the last year or so, for my grandmothers months mind and anniversary mass. It was the first time since I was a teenager at a mass and it was also the first time I ever actually found myself listening to a mass properly (blame this forum :pac:)

I normally stand but not kneel and I don't say the prayers. I do give collection which I admit is an embarrassment thing more than anything, I've no particular desire to help the church without knowing where the money goes.

JBnaglfar

Mark Hamill wrote: »

There should be something like AA tokens for atheists who stop going to mass :pac::

We could set up an Atheists Anonymous group, the AA... wait a sec :P.
How about Atheists Nonymous?
I've been mass free for about 12 years, bar the odd wedding, funeral etc. and even then I don't even go through the standing/kneeling motions.

Penn

Canis Lupus wrote: »

My father just passed away so I've just had more mass in the last week than I've had in the last 10 years.

I tell you what's really ****ing freaky is on the night of the wake having a house full of people doing a decade of the rosary. Now we all know it's a stupid long thing (why why why all the repetition) but when a bunch of people surround a dead body and essentially chant at it, it's a genuinely disturbing experience.

I've been to funerals before but never paid attention, this time round I guess I noticed more and it was laughable watching a priest wandering about throwing 'holy' water and shaking the incense burner etc. I honestly think everyone should go to mass every once in a while simply to remember how bat**** crazy it all is.

Sorry for your loss CL.

It was only at Mass last weekend that I realised that I have no idea why we stand for some prayers and kneel for others. I don't get it.

mikhail

I used go while living under my parents' roof - as someone else said, to avoid the argument. Then, I decided I'd had enough of that, and had the argument, which saves me an hour a week at the cost of frequent snide remarks from my father. Not living at home any more helps in that regard.

VW 1 wrote: »

At my Grandads funeral last year I didnt go up for communion and about a week later it was brought up by a family member that they were disgusted by my behaviour at the funeral and I had brought shame on the family, as if having my own beliefs and opinions are unacceptable..Im 22 ffs!!

That's sad. Are you openly atheist or just 'refusing to go to mass'? (I was the latter for a long time - it's the easier argument.)

Penn

darjeeling wrote: »

Asked "Do you go to mass?", boards.ie said:

No - 85%
Yes - 15%

http://m.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056034332

Yeah, I remember that thread. It was just that my sister commented after mass on Friday night how "I thought you were an atheist?". I started to wonder about specifically how many atheists go to Mass on certain occasions

tallaghtmick

i dont go to mass because i usually have to try not break out laughing at the bolloxology they spout

Dades

My condolences, Canis Lupus.

I was at a funeral mass yesterday. Spent most of it chasing my 2.5 yr old daughter around so didn't have a chance to get annoyed.

I avoided it, but apparently the night before they did the whole body laid out crying and rosary thing, too.
Crackers.

Sunnyisland

Originally Posted by Canis Lupus
My father just passed away so I've just had more mass in the last week than I've had in the last 10 years.

Sorry to hear about your father canis lupis, may he rest in peace.

Condolences,canis

Only go to mass for occasions like christening/wedding but even at that it's been extremely rare.
havent visited a sangha either :rolleyes:

Beruthiel

Canis Lupus wrote: »

My father just passed away

My condolences CL.

Turtwig

bluewolf wrote: »

Condolences,canis

Only go to mass for occasions like christening/wedding but even at that it's been extremely rare.
havent visited a sangha either :rolleyes:

But you do meditate right?

GO_Bear

Weddings only because if I get invited to the full shibang would be cheap of me only to turn up for the food :O. I kinda treat it like having to listen to the full conference lecture ( on something you find boring ) to earn yourself the tea and biccies at the break.


Funerals because it should be the person who has died to decide how they wanna go out. Formality really but I feel the whole funeral process makes it sadder then it has to be. The wake is the best, fill up the house with friends and family and talk about the qualities of the person in question over a few drinks with a sing a long etc etc. Might sound insensitive but thats just me.


As for anniversaries and regular mass. Not in a long time.

Even when I was young :O who wants to go to mass on christmas morning when you just got a new nintendo !

Malty_T

Malty_T wrote: »

But you do meditate right?

About as diligently these days as someone going to mass every sunday ;s
Must get back to it properly

eyescreamcone

I don't believe in any gods even though I was brought up a Cadillac.
I do go for weddings/funerals/anniversary masses out of respect for others but I don't do the sunday stuff at all, even at xmas.

My father (73) recently stopped going after a trip to Rome.
The excess of it all drove him mad.
Also, the child abuse from the priests over here didn't help their cause with him either.
He now declares himself an atheist and wants to sign up for the census as such.
Go Dad!!!

mehfesto

Havn't been since my godchild's baptism (the irony of it all!).

Before that would have been Christmas a few years back, when I was still compelled by the parents.

Honest reckon I'd have gone more if it was one of them African-American churches. I mean I always thought if there was a God, he'd be more happy wit that shindig weekly, rather than my parish priest going hammer and tong through 40 minutes of repetitive dross - every week.

Ickle Magoo

I've been to mass once in my life - and that was more out of curiosity than anything else...visits to churches in general would be lucky to make it past 20 in my entire life - and that's including touristy ones just to appreciate the architecture/art work, weddings and funerals - right bunch of heathens my lot are!

nix84

Apart from weddings/anniversaries etc. I don't go near churches. Stopped going at xmas too a few years ago. Remember telling my Nana, she started arguing with me, hung up the phone and wouldn't speak to me the whole of xmas eve. This from a woman who never acknowledged "god" til she was about 70! She still has the odd dig where I get annoyed and try reasoning with her (stupid me!) but she's having none of it. I'm on the fast track to the under groung BBQ! I was forced to go to mass as a kid but as I got older my parents gave up, partly because they knew they were fighting a losing battle. My Dad goes to mass every weekend and does like novenas and stuff but my Mum doesn't and never really has had the slightest interest in mass or that. My aunt on the other hand doesn't believe in marriage and hasn't baptised either of her kids so I use her as back up when needed! lol

ShooterSF

I do the weddings and funerals like others here. I stand/sit and will try and get a seat at the back where it's not possible to kneel so I don't stand out.

At funerals it even seems to cheer up my friends knowing how uncomfortable I am and we always have a sheepish laugh about at what part I will burst into flames..

The one part though that I get irrationally freaked out though is the hand shaking. Do I look behind be? What if they're looking behind them? What if (and it has happened) someone puts out a hand in my general direction and I go to shake it but someone intercepts and I end up holding my hand out in the air like a spa as they shake hands.
Worst of all knowing it's ahead of me starts the panic and my hands get all clammy from nerves and boy is that a vicious circle!

Shenshen

No.

One of the big advantages of living abroad is that you've always got a handy excuse not to attend family functions that you don't want to go to.

AhSureTisGrand

A few months ago I realised I end up at mass more than many of my "Catholic" friends.

seamus

Funerals, Weddings and probably christenings, though the last one of them I was at was my own.

Most of my family are atheists at this stage, so we usually just find a place at the back to stay out of people's way.

Since I got married, my wife has insisted that because I'm family I now have the attend anniversary masses of her grandparents. Thankfully they've been amalgamated into one yearly mass, so for the sake of a quiet life I go along and spend 30 minutes in my brain, admiring some architecture and laughing about scripture.

Gregor Samsa

I have no problem going to the usual christings/weddings/funerals, maybe even the odd communion/confirmation of friends and close family. If that's what they're into, then that's fine by be and I'll turn up and tune out. I don't go to anniversary masses at all.

The last time I deliberatly went to a mass that wasn't a family occasion was about 15 years ago. I was still living at home, and had been out for the night taking acid. I was still tripping when I was heading home at about 7 in the morning, and knew that my Dad would be getting up for 8.30 mass. It started raining, so I neede somwhere to go so I could avoid him until he headed out to mass, and I could sneak in (you don't want to be talking to your parents when you're tripping).

So, the best plan I could come up with was to go and hide out at the 7.30 mass in the local church - it was the only place open at that hour on a Sunday morning. So I sat at the back, for what seemed like the longest mass in history, surrounded by elderly neighbours, tripping off my head.

I have to say, the acid didn't make it any weirder than it usually is.

strobe

I actually popped in to two or three masses over the last year. Just out of curiosity and boredom really. Much to my surprise I didn't burst into flames as soon as I crossed the threshold. I guess God was distracted at the time. Even started a thread over 'on the dark side' asking for recommendations for different or unique church services, didn't get much of a response (which I was surprised at, would have thought they'd jump at the chance to help save the soul of a filthy atheist) but one Fanny suggested I checked out. A Pentecostal church in town. That was........ interesting. I don't think I had been to a non Catholic service in person before. It was mad, Ted. Very Americany.

Also checked out the Catholic church near where I was living. Just happened to be walking past when the bell started ringing. Had forgotten how unsettling the masses could be, with all the synchronised kneeling and standing and the chanting and responses and incense and all. I kept expecting the priest to start freestyling at any second, rip someones still beating heart out of their chest and begin chanting "Kali mah! Kali mah!". No such luck, although he did tell a parable of his own, with talking ants at a picnic and a lost caterpillar rather than the usual Jesus approved parables they normally come out with. That was kind of good. But yeah, overall it was pretty disturbing to see everyone looking so zombified by the whole carry on.

Want to hit up a Halaqa in one of the Mosques in town at some stage over the next few weeks. Have been putting it off as I am absolutely convinced as soon as I walk in one of them will sense I am not one of them, stand up, point at me, and start emitting a high pitched squeal and maybe have some glowing eyes thing going on. Then they will all turn towards me one by one and do the same thing. That's what Muslims do, you know? But I think I'll chance it anyways.

Truley

I've always hated mass but was forced to go as a kid. I kept up the protest through my entire childhood and manged to 'phase out' of it in my mid teens. As soon as all us kids had left the household my parents stopped going themselves which kind of annoyed me, since all along they had it in their head they were going for my own benefit.

Communions/Confirmations being done in schools seems to be a big thing keeping people in Mass. I remember hearing a group of parents talk about it ouside my local school. Most of them saying the same thing, 'I have no time for God/the church etc I just go for the kids.'

Recently it's been great for me, I average about 2/3 masses a year between funerals, christmas etc. One time I zoned out during a sermon and when the priest finished talking I started clapping

mikhail

Truley wrote: »

One time I zoned out during a sermon and when the priest finished talking I started clapping

Did other people join in sporadically before an uncomfortable silence occurred? I remember seeing something of that sort as a teenager when someone stood up at the wrong time.

keppler

strobe wrote: »

I actually popped in to two or three masses over the last year. Just out of curiosity and boredom really. Much to my surprise I didn't burst into flames as soon as I crossed the threshold. I guess God was distracted at the time. Even started a thread over 'on the dark side' asking for recommendations for different or unique church services, didn't get much of a response (which I was surprised at, would have thought they'd jump at the chance to help save the soul of a filthy atheist) but one Fanny suggested I checked out. A Pentecostal church in town. That was........ interesting. I don't think I had been to a non Catholic service in person before. It was mad, Ted. Very Americany.

Also checked out the Catholic church near where I was living. Just happened to be walking past when the bell started ringing. Had forgotten how unsettling the masses could be, with all the synchronised kneeling and standing and the chanting and responses and incense and all. I kept expecting the priest to start freestyling at any second, rip someones still beating heart out of their chest and begin chanting "Kali mah! Kali mah!". No such luck, although he did tell a parable of his own, with talking ants at a picnic and a lost caterpillar rather than the usual Jesus approved parables they normally come out with. That was kind of good. But yeah, overall it was pretty disturbing to see everyone looking so zombified by the whole carry on.

Want to hit up a Halaqa in one of the Mosques in town at some stage over the next few weeks. Have been putting it off as I am absolutely convinced as soon as I walk in one of them will sense I am not one of them, stand up, point at me, and start emitting a high pitched squeal and maybe have some glowing eyes thing going on. Then they will all turn towards me one by one and do the same thing. That's what Muslims do, you know? But I think I'll chance it anyways.

Strobe, I feel compelled to recommend this book to you..........http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51xUfer%2Bj-L._SL500_AA300_.jpg

liamw

Barrington wrote: »

Or a communion wafer. You simply must try one. They're heavenly

Cheap and healthy... http://www.eden.co.uk/communion-wafers/

iBumblebeetuna

liamw wrote: »

Cheap and healthy... http://www.eden.co.uk/communion-wafers/

Jesus... now gluten free!!! What about a low fat option?

ShooterSF

liamw wrote: »

Cheap and healthy... http://www.eden.co.uk/communion-wafers/

Gross. What would customs think of you trying to import human remains? Must be illegal Uck.

liamw

iBumblebeetuna wrote: »

Jesus... now gluten free!!! What about a low fat option?

I'd go for the wholemeal for good fibrous carbs. Pity, I've never seen the wholemeal ones in church.