Reasons why your mates think you are a bit of a tosser

epgc3fyqirnbsx

I'm never as happy as when I'm having a nice glass of red wine and eating cheese and crackers

Apparantly this makes me a tosser/softcock

I don't care, I'm a happy tosser

eagle10

They must have caught you in the act

KungPao

I masturbate to pictures and videos of naked ladies.

bungler

Monroe Early Cocaine wrote: »

I'm never as happy as when I'm having a nice glass of red wine and eating cheese and crackers

Apparantly this makes me a tosser/softcock

I don't care, I'm a happy tosser

Nothing wrong with that,my wife does that too at the weekend while im out drinking beer with the lads

KeithM89_old

Apparently im a tosser caus i have baths the odd time..:rolleyes:

-Trek-

KungPao wrote: »

I masturbate to pictures and videos of naked ladies.

:eek: animal

Pete M.

When I get slaughtered drunk or inebriated I get thrown out of my friends friends houses for being an obnoxious cnut (on purpose:cool:). That's why my friends think I'm a bit of a tosser. Misunderstood is what it really is though.

Been doing it for years.

epgc3fyqirnbsx

bungler wrote: »

Nothing wrong with that,my wife does that too at the weekend while im out drinking beer with the lads

I'll cheese her cracker if you're busy







christ that's terrible, bed soon I promise

bungler

Trekmad wrote: »

:eek: animal

You masterbate to animals?:eek::eek::eek:

jdivision

I can be an obnoxious drunk

starbelgrade

I love red wine & have only recently started getting into white wine... there's some seriously nice ones to be drank.

Had a really nice bottle of 2008 Chardonnay Semillon last night. It was absolutely delicious - unbelievable texture to it. It was expensive, but well worth it.

Currently sipping a Montepulciano d'Abruzzo. It's OK. Nothing special though.

Wish I had some cheese to go with it. Or nuts.

Damn you Slasher.

LETHAL LADY

Simply my dear because you are a man.

MadPatrick

Wine + cheese = delicious

Remmy

bungler wrote: »

Nothing wrong with that,my wife does that too at the weekend while im out drinking beer with the lads

I was like yeah I know right some nice red wine is lovely with cheese and cra...or wait..

eagle10

starbelgrade wrote: »

I love red wine & have only recently started getting into white wine... there's some seriously nice ones to be drank.

Had a really nice bottle of 2008 Chardonnay Semillon last night. It was absolutely delicious - unbelievable texture to it. It was expensive, but well worth it.

Currently sipping a Montepulciano d'Abruzzo. It's OK. Nothing special though.

Wish I had some cheese to go with it. Or nuts.

Damn you Slasher.

You are a sick twisted individual!!!

Whats wrong with a good old bottle of tonic wine?

epgc3fyqirnbsx

eagle10 wrote: »

You are a sick twisted individual!!!

Whats wrong with a good old bottle of tonic wine?

makes ya fuckfast!

LETHAL LADY

starbelgrade wrote: »

I love red wine & have only recently started getting into white wine... there's some seriously nice ones to be drank.

Had a really nice bottle of 2008 Chardonnay Semillon last night. It was absolutely delicious - unbelievable texture to it. It was expensive, but well worth it.

Currently sipping a Montepulciano d'Abruzzo. It's OK. Nothing special though.

Wish I had some cheese to go with it. Or nuts.

Damn you Slasher.

WTF.

Cavehill Red

Drink whiskey like real men, you pansies!

eagle10

Monroe Early Cocaine wrote: »

makes ya fuckfast!

Brandy makes me randy
and whisky makes me frisky

-Trek-

bungler wrote: »

You masterbate to animals?:eek::eek::eek:

No,

do you?

bungler

Monroe Early Cocaine wrote: »

I'm never as happy as when I'm having a nice glass of red wine and eating cheese and crackers

Apparantly this makes me a tosser/softcock

I don't care, I'm a happy tosser

Are you reading Womans Way while you sip wine and nibble cheese?

bungler

Trekmad wrote: »

No,

do you?

Have you not seen Miss Piggy, I'd tap that:D

fonecrusher1

KeithM89 wrote: »

Apparently im a tosser caus i have baths the odd time..:rolleyes:

Apparently its ghey to like having baths. I don't give a fcuk. I love having a bath instead of a shower.

starbelgrade

Cavehill Red wrote: »

Drink whiskey like real men, you pansies!

I love whiskey, but for some reason, when I raise my glass to drink it, my pinky finger sticks out, making it impossible to drink it like a real man.

eagle10

starbelgrade wrote: »

I love whiskey, but for some reason, when I raise my glass to drink it, my pinky finger sticks out, making it impossible to drink it like a real man.

weirdo

starbelgrade

jdivision wrote: »

I can be an obnoxious drunk

I can be obnoxious even when I'm sober.

Cavehill Red

starbelgrade wrote: »

I love whiskey, but for some reason, when I raise my glass to drink it, my pinky finger sticks out, making it impossible to drink it like a real man.

Try drinking it out of a mug?
Failing that, you could always cut off the erring finger and use it to stir the icecubes.

eagle10

starbelgrade wrote: »

I can be obnoxious even when I'm sober.

At last an honest bollix on this forum

LETHAL LADY

lOkay it does seem that men have a fascination with suprise suprise.

eagle10

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

lOkay it does seem that men have a fascination with suprise suprise.

I'm only 13

epgc3fyqirnbsx

bungler wrote: »

Are you reading Womans Way while you sip wine and nibble cheese?

Heat and Cosmo! Some serious advantages living with wimmins

-Trek-

bungler wrote: »

Have you not seen Miss Piggy, I'd tap that:D

That is just wrong in so many ways

LETHAL LADY

Fair enough Ive got toenails older than you.

bungler

Trekmad wrote: »

That is just wrong in so many ways

Sorry been drinkin beer and whiskey all night, langered:)

bungler

Monroe Early Cocaine wrote: »

Heat and Cosmo! Some serious advantages living with wimmins

Very true Slasher, you'll never have to worry about running out of tampons:D

pwd

because of my arrogance and lack of tact.

daddydick

I'm 26 years of age and it's just dawned on me that I have never, ever drank a glass of red wine. I need to sort that out....on Feb 1st when the drinking ban is over!

starbelgrade

daddydick wrote: »

I'm 26 years of age and it's just dawned on me that I have never, ever drank a glass of red wine. I need to sort that out....on Feb 1st when the drinking ban is over!

Drinking ban?

*hides wine*

When did that start?

bungler

starbelgrade wrote: »

Drinking ban?

*hides wine*

When did that start?

Dont know if its from the amount of beer ive drank tonight but your comment
*hides wine*
Has just made me snot on my keyboard while farting at the same time

RoundyMooney

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Apparently its ghey to like having baths. I don't give a fcuk. I love having a bath instead of a shower.

I love me bath, one of these jacuzzi jobs, titillates the pores like a thousand euro brasser.

eagle10

RoundyMooney wrote: »

I love me bath, one of these jacuzzi jobs, titillates the pores like a thousand euro brasser.

Its only a normal bath dont mind him he eats a load of beans egg and curry before he goes in....... Jacuzzi my arse

Cavehill Red

RoundyMooney wrote: »

titillates the pores like a thousand euro brasser.

Forgive me for intruding on a personal transaction, but if you're paying a chick a grand to titillate your pores, then you're doing it wrong.

starbelgrade

Cavehill Red wrote: »

Forgive me for intruding on a personal transaction, but if you're paying a chick a grand to titillate your pores, then you're doing it wrong.

I pay a chick to titillate my whores.

My real name is Hugh Hefner.

eagle10

bungler wrote: »

Nothing wrong with that,my wife does that too at the weekend while im out drinking beer with the lads

What do you do when she's out drinking beer with the lads?

RoundyMooney

eagle10 wrote: »

Its only a normal bath dont mind him he eats a load of beans egg and curry before he goes in....... Jacuzzi my arse

I have been rumbled.

bungler

eagle10 wrote: »

What do you do when she's out drinking beer with the lads?

Scratch my balls,eat fatty food,look at porn or do knick knocks on the neighbours,anything but sit in and drink wine,eat cheese and hide my willy between my legs