Dreadful Weekend! Have to give my dog up!

Betsy18

Hi Guys,

I have a 6 month old shihtzu who i adore to bits. we had a great schedule where my other half was at home with her during the week and i had her at weekends when he was at work. she was never left on her own during the day. unfortunately my other half has been told over the weekend that his work schedule has been changed and he will be starting to work weekdays from next week! our first thought was for our puppy, we knew we couldn't leave her at home all day every day. after alot of talking and tears we have decided that the fairest option is to try and get a new home for her.

I have been contacted by another shihtzu owner who wants to take her, she has a 7 mths old male but just wants a companion for him she is not interested in breeding them. she invited us to her home and it is obvious to us that she looks after and adores her dog. ours and hers played like mad with each other and had a great time together. i am happy for her to take our dog but my only fear is that mine hasnt had her first heat yet and before we left the house the male kept trying to hump our little pet. myself and the other owner were shocked that as he is so young he would do this, she wants to know is it possible to get a pill or anything to stop him from humping her as she does not want to get her spayed or him neutered yet as she thinks they are too young.

I'd appreciate any advice you can give me on this.

Before anyone critiscies me about giving up the dog i can assure you we did not make this decision lightly and it is absolutely breaking our hearts but we cannot keep her locked up indoors for 11 hours a day!

Thanks!!

Toulouse

Have you considered a dog walker or doggy daycare for your little one?

Afaik there is no magic pill to stop him humping her. Both your dogs are starting to mature so there is a very big risk that if you give your girl to this lady then she will end up with two unneutered dogs and I think if it were me in that situation I wouldn't be happy until one or both were neutered.

If you can't be 100% sure that there will be no accidents if you rehome to this woman then I'd keep looking. There are bound to be loads of more suitable homes out there for a little shih tzu.

toadfly

If you decide to go with this family you need to get your girl spayed before handing her over. She isnt too young, they can be spayed from 6 months. Have a chat to your vet.

andreac

Please get your bitch spayed before gicing her to the new owner. Its the only way to guarantee theres no risk of pups.
She is not too young and neither is the male!

This concerns me really that she is saying they are too young, i would ensure one of them is neutered at least before she takes your dog.

lrushe

Personally if I didn't feel confident that the new owner would spay your dog, I would hold onto the dog for a little while longer until after her first heat and spay her before rehoming her at 6 months old she should be coming into heat pretty soon anyway. This new owner doesn't sound experienced enough to keep an intact male and female in one house, accidents can so easily happen.
If she is totally against getting the dog spayed then maybe this isn't the right new home for your dog.

ISDW

Regarding the spaying, I agree with the previous posters completely, I would be very concerned about her going to this home unspayed, or their male unneutered.

Whereabouts do you live? There are doggy daycare centres now in a few places around the country, she wouldn't have to go there every day, maybe 2/3 days a week and she would be worn out for the next day I'd say, all that playing and having fun:D

andreac

To be honest, giving up your dog is a last resort and i honestly dont think this situation needs to resort to this.

Your dog would much prefer to stay with you, and be alone for those hours then be rehomed to someone she doesnt know.

Yes its not ideal but you can manage and anyway, most dogs just sleep all day anyway when their owner isnt there.

Walk her before work and after and she will be fine.

Betsy18

the new owner is hoping to get her dog neutered asap but im afraid of what may happen before then. i am taking mine to the vets for a checkup today so im going to ask the vet about spaying her, if she agrees i will do this before i hand her over. unfortunately there is no doggy daycares near us we did think of that and every other option but this is the fairest to our little pet. i am absolutely heartbroken about it!:(

Tranceypoo

Betsy, please tell us what area you are in, we may know of some day care or even dog walkers that you may not be aware of

boxerly

What area are you in,there may be no day care but you may find a person at home all day who minds doggies,You can also get people to call to your house who will walk you doggie etc.I dont think your situation means you have to rehome your dog but Im not in it so you know best.Please...if you love you dog as much as it seems try whatever you have to to keep her.xxx

anniehoo

Betsy how many hours a day do you realistically think she will be on her own for? As previously mentioned, plenty of people have dogs and have full time jobs, everyone has to adapt including the dog i.e a walk in the morning, possibly someone calling in during the day a few times a week and an evening walk. The middle of the day call in isnt vital if you cant find someone. Its not an ideal situation but people have to work...your dog will be fine. But if you are adamant in giving her away i agree with all the posters above, spay her before you give her to that other person. Ive a niggling suspicion she does want to breed tbh.Nobody in their right mind would take a 6mth old unneutered female to live with a 7mth old unneutered male. There'll be pups in no time.

adser53

I agree with anniehoo above. Its not the worst thing in the world for a dog to be home alone while its owners work. We all have to do it. A walk in the morning and again with loads of attention in the evening and youll be fine. I had a similar scenario about 5 years back when we only had 1 cav. Our solution... Did what i said above, dog just slept all day but then we got a second to keep him company

lorebringer

Betsy18 wrote: »

the new owner is hoping to get her dog neutered asap but im afraid of what may happen before then. i am taking mine to the vets for a checkup today so im going to ask the vet about spaying her, if she agrees i will do this before i hand her over. unfortunately there is no doggy daycares near us we did think of that and every other option but this is the fairest to our little pet. i am absolutely heartbroken about it!

So many pet owners face this problem but as long as she is safe and warm inside, has some toys to play with and a nice bed she will adjust to sleeping all day on her own faster than you would think. Giving up a pet really is a last resort and because you are so reluctant to do so please try all other options first. Have you left her at home alone for a long period of time to see how she gets on? Maybe try to sort a new routine and see how she adjusts before giving her to someone else. Doggy day care is not a must, neither is a walker (but they are preferable) so if you don't have one, it's not that big a deal. It really sounds like you feel you have no other option but you do - you just need to be creative and she will be a ok to stay home alone for the day. At least give it a go before you right it off completely.

anniehoo wrote: »

Nobody in their right mind would take a 6mth old unneutered female to live with a 7mth old unneutered male. There'll be pups in no time.

This would be my biggest worry. I have had young, and very randy, intact dogs and bitches in my house and it is very hard work. If the person you are thinking of giving your dog to has not neutered her dog yet (knowing that there may have an intact bitch coming into the house) she probably will not get it done. Personally, I would insist that I (if it were my dog) would get her neutered before she steps foot into the other home - not up for debate, but that's just me. I don't know the circumstances of this other person but mixing intact bitches and dogs is very risky. If she does not want you to neuter your bitch before she takes her then her plans are pretty clear and she will more than likely not do it once she gets to her house.

sophie1234

this happened with my dog i had to go back to college so was worried about him and it was really before doggy day cares and walkers were big i was worried at first but i woke up that extra hour earlier some morning it would mean walking him at 5.30/6 am in the winter dark and cold but still got a good hour then off to college i went left him some toys (kongs are great with frozen stuff inside) then tried to get home at lunch me or my sister or my rents to see him (wasnt always possible! ) then when i got home i would give him another walk! he loved it and spent most of the day sleeping and was so happy when we came home! then wen i got holidays it was great spending a full week with him! then we got a second dog to keep him company witch he loves!

giving your dog away really should be a last resort and you should try out some of the tips given by people on here because its really good advice and if it doesnt work out then maybe think about it! but really do try some of these methods!

Sigma Force

I don't understand why you have to give the dog away, many dog owners work full hours and can still keep a dog. You do not need to be home all day for your dog at 6 months of age she is now old enough to be left for longer.
Obviously you should start gradually but people make up for it by getting up earlier and walking the dog in the evening, it's certainly not impossible and it doesn't take long for a dog to get into a new routine and in fact dogs thrive on routine they don't care what time they go out at as long as they go out and they soon become so used to it they will be there waiting for you at the same time every evening.

It's not ideal but not impossible, there are also people who will walk dogs they might be a neighbour or a relative, you might be able to find someone locally that will take the dog out every day for a short walk to break up the day there's always some retired person or even a stay at home person who for whatever reason can't have a dog themselves that would probably love to take the dog for a stroll for the company.

I'd look into all options again before handing a dog over, plus as said ensure she's spayed if you do and you get some sort of written agreement and can check up on the dog in a few weeks to ensure there are no probs. you don't want the new owners handing the dog over to someone else.

liquoriceall

I have to say I totally agree that there is always a way! I work full time and live alone so I get up early in the morning to walk him, and Im really lucky Im now paying a girl I know who it suits 5 euro a day 3 days a week for her to call to him for approx 1 hour and then a walk in the evening and all weekend together! He got used to it and as far as I know he just sleeps while Im at work. I bet if you ask around there will be someone who would walk her for you for a small fee. Also even if you keep her its really time to get her spayed anyways. Good luck!

magentas

If having a job means you can't keep a dog then the (or my!:o) world would be a very sad place!

I'm really sorry to rant on as well OP, I know you said decision is made but please think about it. You obviously don't want to give up your girl and not to sound patronising but I really don't think you have to.

I know how you feel, my boy is couple of weeks younger than yours and we got him when I lost my job. I was out of work for just over 3months and recently returned to full time work. This allowed me to be around all day when he was a puppy and needed lots of attention and training. He's 5months now and as I knew I would be returning to work I have him used to being on his own as I gradually got him used to longer periods of being on his own. Dogs can adjust to pretty much any situation, just try to make it easy for her by breaking her into it gently, leaving her for an extra half hour each day.

We also intend to adopt another dog so they can be company for each other.
Maybe you could consider this?

I know it's tough but you sound like a lovely person that loves her dog and genuinely doesn't want to give her up...so don't!

Betsy18

Thanks for all your comments and advice guys, i have checked every option available to us from doggy day care ( which is 1.5 hrs drive from us!) to dog walkers and if there was someone to check on her during the day but unfortunately there is nobody. I havent taken this decision lightly at all but my main concern now is finding the right home for her and making sure she will be happy and get the attention she deserves in it.

i contacted the person interested in taking her as a companion dog but voiced my concern regarding her dog not being neutered, she is going to talk to her vet about getting him done asap as i have said i will not give mine over until i am sure he has been neutered. My vet has advised me against spaying mine yet as she is only 6mths and hasnt had her 1st heat yet, they have said it is better for her to have her 1st heat but if i persisted they would do it. i would be happy for this person to take her as i could see she loves her own dog alot but i would be a lot happier to hear her dog has been neutered first.

She little girl loves attention and dosent like being left alone for too long so i know she would not like being alone all day for 12 hours! its too long for her so in her best interest we think it is only fair to give her to someone who can spend the day with her and spoil her as much as we have! i'll miss her like mad but i love her too much and only want her to be happy and have a nice home.

ISDW

Betsy18 wrote: »

Thanks for all your comments and advice guys, i have checked every option available to us from doggy day care ( which is 1.5 hrs drive from us!) to dog walkers and if there was someone to check on her during the day but unfortunately there is nobody. I havent taken this decision lightly at all but my main concern now is finding the right home for her and making sure she will be happy and get the attention she deserves in it.

i contacted the person interested in taking her as a companion dog but voiced my concern regarding her dog not being neutered, she is going to talk to her vet about getting him done asap as i have said i will not give mine over until i am sure he has been neutered. My vet has advised me against spaying mine yet as she is only 6mths and hasnt had her 1st heat yet, they have said it is better for her to have her 1st heat but if i persisted they would do it. i would be happy for this person to take her as i could see she loves her own dog alot but i would be a lot happier to hear her dog has been neutered first.

She little girl loves attention and dosent like being left alone for too long so i know she would not like being alone all day for 12 hours! its too long for her so in her best interest we think it is only fair to give her to someone who can spend the day with her and spoil her as much as we have! i'll miss her like mad but i love her too much and only want her to be happy and have a nice home.

There are differing opinions on that, some research shows that spaying before the first heat greatly reduces the chances of the dog developing cancer.

Best of luck with her.

DeadlyByDesign

I am so glad I read this thread as there is differing views on what constitutes what is fair in leaving the dog when one works. In 3 weeks I am getting a 2 month old Great Dane Puppy. i mad a thread in another forum about my situation of having to work full time and keep a dog.

I was basically panned over a 3 page thread. Basically I was told that the only suitable dog owners are ones that have their own business and can stay at home all day, or someone that is unemployed. I was baffled and was very close not getting the animal. I was broken hearted as I basically have wanted this Dog since a child and now I finally have the space and means to keep one.

I have decided now to go with a doggy day care for the first few months while it is a puppy. So that is basically 13 euro a day over a 5 day week. I am determined to get the dog, but I am wondering if I can get the stay in the day care down to a 2-3 day week after a certain amount of time?

Sorry for the thread Hi-jack, on topic, OP please try and reconsider if possible. I am sure the dog is in a loving and safe enviornment.

ncmc

ISDW wrote: »

There are differing opinions on that, some research shows that spaying before the first heat greatly reduces the chances of the dog developing cancer.

Best of luck with her.

+1 on this, I got my dog neutered at 6 months before she had her first heat, it suited me as we live in an estate and I didn't want every randy dog in the neighbourhood sniffing round my baby! Our vet actually recommended getting her neutured before her first heat as it does apparently reduce the chance of certain types of cancer. My dog certainly had no ill effects after it.

magentas

almost everyone I know that has a dog works...it's unrealistic to say you can't keep a dog if you work.
you just need to put in the extra bit of effort, get up an hour earlier to walk them in mornings and bring them for good long walk in evenings.
spend plenty of time playing with them and make sure they have nice secure space and plenty of toys/kongs for during the day.
it is a small sacrafice (I don't even see it as a sacrafice TBH, I enjoy it!) for what you get in return from your dog.

deadlybydesign, congratulations on your great dane, you sound very responsible and put a lot of thought into your decision.
post pics when your puppy arrives!

betsy18, if your mind in truely made up then I am very sorry for you.
I'm sure you can visit your girl from time to time and maybe mind her and her new pal when the lady is away?
when are you giving her up?

Vel

Just because she gets her dog neutered doesn't mean she can't mate your dog with another dog. Maybe she will, maybe she won't but if it were me I wonder under no circumstances rehome my own dog unspayed. I know of plenty of dogs spayed before their first heat and they are perfectly healthy dogs, both mentally and physically. I'd rather spay my dog 'too early' at 6 months than having the risk of her churning out pups in the future.

LucyBliss

I got my dogs neutered at 6 months and I was glad to do it! The female hadn't been in heat and I wanted to get it done before the male felt the first pangs of young love - or lust - and became even more of a hardcore brat.

I think unless you're going to breed them, 6/7 months is the right time to do it. Best to nip these things in the bud unless you want a pack of dogs drooling on your doorstep or having to scour the county looking for your randy male dog who thinks he's Casanova. No thanks!

barbiegirl

Our Sindy was neutered about 5 months as she's had a break in her tail and needed to be put under for the X-Ray and the vet felt it was best to get it all done together plus she recommended before first heat too. I would not rehome into this environment without first neutering.
OP I do understand your dilemma and I would acknowledge that everyone pretty much has to work, so if a walker or care isn't an option, consider another dog or cat to keep company then she won't be on her own and you'll have double the joy when you come home. :-)

Graces7

"Juvenile spaying" is the more accepted practice in Canada; especially for males. It prevents what they call "hormone memory" ; less stress therefore. In males who have matured, it takes 6 months for the testosterone to leave totally.

The only side effect is that they can be a little leggy.

And yes; dogs adapt to being left. Our wee one was one case in point; we were sometimes needing to be out for several hours; we used to stop and listen and as she got used to being left, not even a single cry. They simply as others have said, sleep and they don;t have the same sense of time we have.

Betsy18

thanks for all your replies Guys! i have decided not to give her to that lady but have found her a lovely home. the lady taking her has a female shih tzu and wants company for her, she keeps them indoors and is home all day with them, she also lives beside the beach and will walk them each day!! i'm so happy to have got her a new home. she is going to her new home tomorrow so theres alot of tears tonight, i'm broken hearted but its the fairest option for my little pet, if i kept her she would be alone for 13 hours a day with nobody around to even call on her during the day. i could not do this to her as it kills me to even leave her a few hours a day! all i can do now is to enjoy the time i have left with her tonight and give her plenty of cuddles. i really hope her new owner gets as much happiness and enjoyment our of her as we have but i'll miss her like mad.

hondasam

I have not read all this thread and Im just going to say what I think right now. I would never give up either of my dogs and I work, I leave them in the house when Im gone. It would break my heart if I had to get rid of them but then I have my dogs for a long time and not just six months so Im very attached to them. My youngest dog is a german shepard and she is just a year old. rant over and sorry in advance.

dvet

In response to the above post: "I would hold onto the dog for a little while longer until after her first heat and spay her before rehoming her at 6 months old she should be coming into heat pretty soon anyway."

It is definitely better to spay your dog before her first heat (so around 6 months is recommended by nearly all vets). It makes the chance of future mammary tumours pretty much nil. With every heat your bitch has, her chance of getting mammary tumours rises considerably, so the earlier you do it, the better. Plus you don't have that risk of her getting pregnant on her first heat - that would be a disaster.

And you also get all the other benefits of preventing uterine and ovarian cancers, and pyometra, but ye probably know that spiel anyway... no harm repeating it tho - the more owners that know it, the better!

lrushe

dvet wrote: »

In response to the above post: "I would hold onto the dog for a little while longer until after her first heat and spay her before rehoming her at 6 months old she should be coming into heat pretty soon anyway."

It is definitely better to spay your dog before her first heat (so around 6 months is recommended by nearly all vets). It makes the chance of future mammary tumours pretty much nil. With every heat your bitch has, her chance of getting mammary tumours rises considerably, so the earlier you do it, the better. Plus you don't have that risk of her getting pregnant on her first heat - that would be a disaster.

And you also get all the other benefits of preventing uterine and ovarian cancers, and pyometra, but ye probably know that spiel anyway... no harm repeating it tho - the more owners that know it, the better!

I believe I am the person you have quoted so let me paint a more balanced picture of early spaying:

Advantages of Early Spaying:
Reduces the risk of Mammary Cancer (though 50% are malignant).
Prevents Pregnancy.
Prevents Pyometra.
Reduces the small risk of Uterine, Overian and Cervical Cancer (less than 0.5%).

Disadvantages of Early Spaying:
Increases the risk of Female Incontinence (4-20%).
Increase the risk of in Vascular Tumours (5%).
Signifiicantly increases the risk of Bone Cancer, a cancer with poor prognosis.
Possible Endocrine Disorders in later life.
Increase in Orthopedic Disorders.

Early spaying is one of the most argued topics in veterinary medicine. It is recommended by vets because so many pet owners can't be trusted to prevent unplanned pregnancies, however very few discuss the many disadvantages of the procedure.
Far be for me to tell the OP what to do, it is always an individual decision, I would just like to see more balanced information given to pet owners so they can make an informed decision, I don't think it's fair that the side effects are never discussed.
As you say the more owners who know that the better.

dvet

lrushe - yes, I definitely agree with you there, there are certainly pros and cons to early spaying, but the other fact is that most (not all) of the cons are treatable/not significantly life threatening issues, and as well as this a lot of the complications (particularly incontinence) are associated mostly with very early age spaying (<3 months) - which is not really done in Ireland. On the balance of things I'm very much pro spaying, at 6 months of age.

It's a great debate to get into though - and sorry for not quoting you properly earlier - i'm a bit of a blonde like that!

lrushe

Like I said it's an individual choice. I spent many years only hearing the pro's that I was shocked that there was some major con's so I often like to throw them out there for people to hear.
It is an interesting discussion alright and one I could talk about all night if allowed!

dvet

It's true - although we might get kicked out for going off topic! I'm newish to boards and I don't want to get on the wrong side of all the lovely mods out there!! Hehe

Betsy18

My little pet went to her new home on Sunday, the lady that has her is a lovely person and really genuine. she adores shih tzus and has a female one herself, she wanted to take on mine as her child has special needs and loves dogs and she wanted another for her. when i seen how good they were with my little one i was really happy. she is going to get her spayed after her first heat as she did that with her own and i do believe she will. I was heartbroken to hand my baby over but i was also so glad to have found this person, as they were exactly what we wanted. (she will be home all day and they dogs are kept indoors and spoilt rotten, she also lives beside the beach and takes them for walks on it every day!) she has also promised to keep me updated on how my puppy is doing and send me pics etc over time which she has already done and has helped me alot!

this has been an awful time for me and my main and only priority was to find the best home possible for my wee dote, i am now happy that i have found that for her and she will get the love and attention she deserves.

thanks for all your comments!:)

portgirl123

xxxxxxxxxxx

Vel

I'm glad you feel like you have found a good home for your dog OP and am very sorry you had to give her up. I'd never be able to give any of mine up:(
I do think its a pity however that you didn't spay her first before you rehomed her. I've been involved in some small scale rescue myself over the years and have learned that people are often not what they seem. Hopefully she will spay her but personally I would never have taken such a risk with a dog I loved so much.

Betsy18

Vel wrote: »

I'm glad you feel like you have found a good home for your dog OP and am very sorry you had to give her up. I'd never be able to give any of mine up:(
I do think its a pity however that you didn't spay her first before you rehomed her. I've been involved in some small scale rescue myself over the years and have learned that people are often not what they seem. Hopefully she will spay her but personally I would never have taken such a risk with a dog I loved so much.

Hi

I did not spay her first as i trust the advice given to me by my vet and want her to have her first heat, i fully trust this lady will spay her as soon as she has had her heat and I would NOT have given her to this lady if i had any suspicions of her breeding her. i love my pet too much to do that and you have no idea the lengths i went to ensure she got a good home with someone genuine.

ncmc

Betsy18 wrote: »

Hi

I did not spay her first as i trust the advice given to me by my vet and want her to have her first heat, i fully trust this lady will spay her as soon as she has had her heat and I would NOT have given her to this lady if i had any suspicions of her breeding her. i love my pet too much to do that and you have no idea the lengths i went to ensure she got a good home with someone genuine.

I've been reading this story with interest since you first posted. I can't even begin to think how difficult this decision was for you. It sounds like you really went out of your way to find a fantastic home for your baby. I'm sure the owner will neuture your dog when the time comes, she sounds like a wonderful owner and the whole set up sounds so idyllic, I'm sure your girl will be very happy.

Do you have the option of visiting her, or would you find that too difficult? You have got a lot of contrasting views on this subject, a topic like this will always be emotive. But you did what you feel was best for your situation and for your dog, don't feel bad or allow others to guit trip you.

Hope you are ok during this difficult time.

Betsy18

ncmc wrote: »

I've been reading this story with interest since you first posted. I can't even begin to think how difficult this decision was for you. It sounds like you really went out of your way to find a fantastic home for your baby. I'm sure the owner will neuture your dog when the time comes, she sounds like a wonderful owner and the whole set up sounds so idyllic, I'm sure your girl will be very happy.

Do you have the option of visiting her, or would you find that too difficult? You have got a lot of contrasting views on this subject, a topic like this will always be emotive. But you did what you feel was best for your situation and for your dog, don't feel bad or allow others to guit trip you.

Hope you are ok during this difficult time.

Thanks for your comment, i can visit her but i dont think i could face it at the moment but maybe in a few months to see how much she has settled in. the new owner is really lovely and has told me numerous times that if i change my mind i can take her back she will even travel to meet me. I am delighted we found this lovely home for her.