What's the most Urbanistic thing you've seen a City Dweller do?

starbelgrade

City dwellers - they get excited when they see a field full of sheep, they get worried when they're driving on a country road at night that doesn't have street lights, they panic if they leave their housing estate without a Sat Nav, they get surprised when they get a pint for less than €4 & they ask silly questions, like "can you get a bus from here?" and "what time does the bar close?" when they're in a rural pub.

So, what's the most urbanistic* thing you've seen a city dweller do?


* = Yes, I made this word up

Mr. Rager

Urban people... always thinking they're better than us :mad:

SeaFields

Roar in terror..."what the fcuk is that?!!!!"

Its ok little urban dwelling dude, its just a cow.

--Kaiser--

Throw a plastic bottle on the ground

Teferi

Eat ham sandwiches and not hang sangwiches.

funkyjebus

contribute to society.

cowhands

My Dad lives in the country in the midlands. He has an acre of garden that faces onto 52 arces of land for cattle and sheep.
One of the first times my other half (orginally from Dublin) came to visit he popped outside for a smoke and came running shouting "theres bleedin' bull in your garden!"...

...No love thats cow and its in a field...

Cantona's Collars

Run riot in Courtown on bank holiday weekends.Wear pyjamas to the shops.

Helmet

I grew up just on the Louth side of the border. I once had a little Dubín visiting for the weekend. We went for a spin, he was driving and I slowly but surely guided him across the border into South Armagh. After a while he asked me were we far from the North, I informed him that we were indeed in Northern Ireland. He let a little shriek out of him, did a dirty great U-turn and belted it back South as fast as his Ford Escort could carry him. He was genuinely petrified, he thought that he wasn't allowed to drive in the North and had been expecting a whole big border-crossing/immigration ordeal.......the crazy little Jackeen had even brought his passport...bless!

markesmith

Develop very strange accents

Notorious97

Do you mean Dublin folk or are we including a makeshift 'city' you find in other counties?

GavRedKing

Drive huge foooooook off 4 x 4 around the city

anniehoo

Helmet wrote: »

He was genuinely petrified, he thought that he wasn't allowed to drive in the North and had been expecting a whole big border-crossing/immigration ordeal.......the crazy little Jackeen had even brought his passport...bless!

Dont blame him. I still remember being stopped at the border by guys with guns with "heads" on them asking to search our car boot...scary shyte when you're 5. Stuck in my head for a long long while...

MidlandsM

What's the most Urbanistic thing you've seen a City Dweller do?

well, .....pay 400k for a shoebox apt in a sh*thole area of Dublin.

pawrick

waiting for the train in Athlone at 2am to bring them back to Dublin (locked doors and no lights on at the station didn't give them a clue and no they had no alcohol on them).

ask me how to milk a cow? I've as much idea as anyone who saw it on tv.

assume I grew up on a farm / play GAA etc.

maybe more a dublin thing:

not know how to drive a car.

complain about the dark when out walking in the country at night!

ask me if I was Polish or English? (just because my accent is different doesnt mean I'm foreign!)

lay on the street passed out during the day

grab old womens hand bags

ask for change for a "hostel"

complain about coppers/flannerys and end up there anyhow on a night out

Deus Ex Machina

It is a trait among many country folk (I won't use absolutes like the initial post because that is clearly absurd) to believe that they are in some way tougher or more savvy than people who live in cities. It is hilarious when you actually confront these people on the issue, and see if they can provide tangible examples of how exactly they are superior and why this is the case, it usually ends up in some sort of tirade against "city people" and how they are soft in some unqauntifiable way.

landsleaving

I don't know.. own an apartment?

Maybe moan about people from outside Dublin, that seems popular too.

Why can't we all just be friends?

topper75

Protest a fair shoulder-on-shoulder challenge when playing football.

CiaranC

Earn 95% of the GDP of the country

Sykk

They get surprised at how people are actually friendly and welcoming in small towns.

They end up moving down and buying a house when they realize it's actually safe for their kids to play outside.

They can't believe houses actually have gardens.

They go to any sporting match and stand in awe at how much better people from the country are at sports.

They try to hide their stupid accent when they hear how normal people actually communicate.

They can actually breath a full intake of oxygen rather than smoke from a double decker bus.

SugarHigh

There was a dublin guy in Mayo who rang up the local radio station to complain that some scumbag had dumped a bath tub in the middle of a field. It was in fact being used by the farmer to give his cows drinking water.

Millicent

CiaranC wrote: »

Earn 95% of the GDP of the country

Ah here. Don't be just pulling figures out of your arse. It doesn't help you make your sarky point.

Misanthrope

Drive through miles of urban traffic to the gym to use a treadmill for an hour.

Eat poison berries

Run away screaming from a cow.

Pace2008

starbelgrade wrote: »

they get worried when they're driving on a country road at night that doesn't have street lights,

And not without reason, considering most fatal accidents occur on these roads, and our rural friends often have less compunction with getting behind the wheel after a beer or 10.

Millicent

A school friend of mine from the Brack was coming down to meet me so we could head off to Slane together. We went to school together in Bray and that was the furthest she had ever been "down the country".

So while I'm waiting for her to come down, she rings me and asks me are there any shops/off licences where I live. In Wicklow town. As in the capital town of the county she is coming to. Bless her, she really thought she was coming down to a house surrounded by fields, just because it was past the Pale.

So I did what any decent friend would. I told her "no". :pac: I told her we just had the one pub that was also the shop but we had to drive a long way to get to anything like a supermarket so we'd just have to get a carry out. She believed me too, until she got to the town and rang me excitedly to tell me she could see shops and pubs.

fakearms123

Sit outside a coffee shop with peroxide blonde hair, giant novelty sunglasses with a big dopey judgemental face havin a "smoke" with a big gay cup of mocha choca latte pondering about what to spend daddy's money on next... f*cking sluts!

starbelgrade

Pace2008 wrote: »

And not without reason, considering most fatal accidents occur on these roads, and our rural friends often have less compunction with getting behind the wheel after a beer or 10.

I don't think it's the lack of road lighting that causes the accidents. Most cars have headlights.

Essien

I was stopped in traffic in Walkinstown one day when 2 young Dublin girls in a fiat punto pulled up beside me, the driver asked..

"How do I get to Walkinstown?"

Bob the Seducer

fakearms123 wrote: »

Sit outside a coffee shop with peroxide blonde hair, giant novelty sunglasses with a big dopey judgemental face havin a "smoke" with a big gay cup of mocha choca latte pondering about what to spend daddy's money on next... f*cking sluts!

Oooh... turned you down, eh? :pac:

easyeason3

Stop at pedestrian crossing, press the button to change the lights & actually wait for the light to go green before they cross.
That always cracks me up. Everyone else just crosses the road without the aid of a green light.

fakearms123

Bob the Seducer wrote: »

Oooh... turned you down, eh? :pac:

you probably don't have that problem Mr. Seducer :pac::p

Stercus Accidit

ITT: Disgruntled boggers using the local libraries 50kb dial-up line on their windows 95 machines trying to slag those sensible enough to have moved towards civilisation, for slagging them for being red-faced spud munching yokels.

LOL

Wazdakka

starbelgrade wrote: »

What's the most Urbanistic thing you've seen a City Dweller do?

Being just generally awesome,
Yet specifically better than those plough riding muck savages in every single way.

:cool:

alexa5x5

As a Dub here are some things I'll own up to (and am red faced to admit):
* being surprised that there is only one or two taxi's available for a whole town and shocked that the taxi drive is actually genuinely nice :eek:
* scared when there isn’t any street lights on a road
* shocked when shop keepers are polite to me and don’t just slam my change down on the counter
* That people are genuinely helpful and not just looking for ways to rob me
* That (some) people don’t lock and bolt there doors at night

starbelgrade

Stercus Accidit wrote: »

ITT: Disgruntled boggers using the local libraries 50kb dial-up line on their windows 95 machines trying to slag those sensible enough to have moved towards civilisation, for slagging them for being red-faced spud munching yokels.

LOL

You're in the wrong thread, dude.

Dyr

SeaFields wrote: »

Roar in terror..."what the fcuk is that?!!!!"

Its ok little urban dwelling dude, its just a cow.

I think the actual issue is what the fcuk is it doing in your living room. (for people outside the pale "Living room" is an urban term for the parlour)

Sykk

fakearms123 wrote: »

Sit outside a coffee shop with peroxide blonde hair, giant novelty sunglasses with a big dopey judgemental face havin a "smoke" with a big gay cup of mocha choca latte pondering about what to spend daddy's money on next... f*cking sluts!

This made me spit my coffee all over the place. Thank you, sir.

prinz

Leave a beer garden to go the the shop, so he could come back up to his pint and spray air freshener he bought around the table to get rid of the smell of sheep. A farmer had just driven a small flock past the pub.

CiaranC

Millicent wrote: »

Ah here. Don't be just pulling figures out of your arse. It doesn't help you make your sarky point.

Dublin alone produced 75% of GVA in 2007.

What are culchies actually for?

Pace2008

starbelgrade wrote: »

I don't think it's the lack of road lighting that causes the accidents. Most cars have headlights.

I'm sure the fact that the roads are narrow, winding, and often of poor quality has more to do with it, but they're don't light up motorways purely for the banter.

starbelgrade

I've had friends come to Sligo to visit me from Dublin & have set the route out on their Sat Navs. Now, if anyone knows the N4, it's basically a straight road all the way.

Must be the most boring Sat Nav directions ever;

- Continue on straight
- Continue on straight

(Coming up to Longford;)
- At the roundabout, continue on straight
- At the next roundabout, continue on straight
- At the next roundabout, continue on straight

- Continue on straight
- Continue on straight
- Continue on straight

- You have arrived at your destination

landsleaving

alexa5x5 wrote: »

As a Dub here are some things I'll own up to (and am red faced to admit):
* being surprised that there is only one or two taxi's available for a whole town and shocked that the taxi drive is actually genuinely nice :eek:

I'm guilty of that one too. I was in a town in Leitrim and had to walk for 2 hours because all the taxi drivers were watching the champions league final. Then a few days later, walking back into the town, a car stops, and I very hesitantly go to the drivers window, assuming it's all going to get a bit 'deliverance'. He's the taxi driver I had a few days earlier and he gives me a free lift into town. I was astonished.

strokemyclover

I seen a Dublin kid spit on an electric fence once. It was one of those hanging spits and when it finally made contact with the fence he jumped back and fell on his ass.

Didn't cry though, tough as nails he was!

starbelgrade

CiaranC wrote: »

Dublin alone produced 75% of GVA in 2007.

What are culchies actually for?

I dunno. Why not kill all the culchies and see what happens when you want some food?

pwd

Get excited when approaching the Dublin Hills for the first time, even though they're in sight of their house all their lives.

Then try to do a wee on the pavement in the middle of Enniskerry, while sober in broad daylight, because they think Irish civilization ends where the numbers after Dublin do.

Say "Oh wow, they have a nightclub here," when in an Irish city centre that wasn't Dublin.

Millicent

CiaranC wrote: »

Dublin alone produced 75% of GVA in 2007.

What are culchies actually for?

Really? Cos I'm sure this handy little PDF I actually bothered to link to says otherwise. 41.2% above the State average, apparently and 39.4% GVA for Dublin itself. Doesn't mention anything about 75% so I believe, good sir, that you may actually be talking out of your bum.

Wazdakka

starbelgrade wrote: »

I dunno. Why not kill all the culchies and see what happens when you want some food?

Shouldn't be a problem immediately anyway.

There's plenty of good eating on a clulchie.

starbelgrade

Wazdakka wrote: »

Shouldn't be a problem immediately anyway.

There's plenty of good eating on a clulchie.

I don't think your stomach would be able for it - everyone knows that city dwellers cannot digest food that hasn't been processed.

Millicent

Wazdakka wrote: »

Shouldn't be a problem immediately anyway.

There's plenty of good eating on a clulchie.

It's all the butter country girls like. And none of your "low-fat" sh1te here. Nom nom nom! :pac:

Stercus Accidit

starbelgrade wrote: »

I dunno. Why not kill all the culchies and see what happens when you want some food?

Not much of the food we eat comes from Ireland.

Sykk

Stercus Accidit wrote: »

Not much of the food we eat comes from Ireland.

Yes, yes it does. Depends where you shop.