Irish girls V me

LegacyUser

Hi all. So I've never really had any problems picking up girls or starting relationships with them when living abroad. I've spent the majority of the last 10 years in UK and Canada. I'm 30 now. I've been home a year now and for some reason Irish girls don't seem to find me attractive at all. Or at least that's the impression I'm getting.
I was out a couple of weeks ago chatting to a girl and she touched my arm for some reason and then said "oh you're muscley that's disgusting". Strange thing to say to a stranger don't you think? I work out and keep fit but I'm not a steroid freak or anything.
Also what really got me recently is that a girl at work that I go out with sometimes (she's German) sits with a group of irish girls in the canteen, and all of them (who i've never met) have said to her that they think I'm weird, that I look weird, one of them even said she "can't look at me". I should note that none of these girls are particularly attractive so I don't know why they think they're better than me. I don't think I look weird at all. I've had some really pretty girlfriends in the past too. I'm not vain at all either, and I'm always nice to everyone I meet, no matter where they're from.
Is it just the way women are here in Dublin? My accent is a bit messed up from being abroad too, maybe they don't like that? I never go on about where I've lived either, I know that can annoy people.
I really don't get it, my mother has never had the pleasure of meeting an Irish girlfriend of mine, because I haven't had one since I'm a teenager, and I can't help thinking some of my friends/family think I'm some sort of oddball that can't get Irish girls. Maybe that's what I am? I don't know... I mean the complications of foreign girls can get a bit much, with location, where you will live in the future etc., so I'd like nothing more than to meet a girl from the same background.
I know it's a stupid "problem" and this rant probably doesn't make much sense but any advice or explanations or analysis would be fantastic.
Oh and I'm not dissing Irish girls at all, and I don't want the thread to devolve into that. If all my friends have Irish girlfriends, obviously it's me with the problem, not Irish girls.
Thanks y'all!

LegacyUser

Well first of all, whoever said to you 'ugh muscley thats disgusting' was just downright rude. Regardless if you are thin, fat, or fulla muscles, anybody saying 'that's disgusting' is just looking for a certain reaction.

Are you weird looking? What the hell is weird?
I know a lot of people who embrace their 'weirdness', because that is an intrinsic part of who and what they are. I suspect there is nothing weird at all about you.
Could be you are having difficulty settling back into life in Ireland after a long time abroad, and you no longer have the 'irish identity' to fall back on, so maybe Irish women seem different in that they don't see you they way you might have been looked at abroad.

Truth is, its difficult for all of us after our 20's in Ireland, its still a country all about the couples, getting engaged, getting married, having the kids, getting mortgaged. Can be v tough to come in late in the game.

One thing that bothers me from your post though, what on earth has your mother got to do with it??? Seriously, dude, what is the story there?

LegacyUser

The world is a big place with millions of women so don't narrow your choices down to just the handful of women on this little rock who will most likely melt your brain more then your heart.

Glenshane Pass

""oh you're muscley that's disgusting"

Oh for god sake, where did you run into this nyuck? lol.

I'm not great for responding to these threads OP, but it sounds like you're overanalysing on the basis of some really idiotic people. Thats it. Don't get hung up on it.
Just get involved in different things and you'll soon meet some nice people, not judgemental twats.

LegacyUser

that was outside Rira. No you're right, I've just been unfortunate, I hope, and am running into the wrong sorts, over and over! Maybe Dublin just has a large number of assholes in it! Or maybe I need to move back to London!

LegacyUser

Did your girlfriend stand up for you when these girls said you were weird? Did she ask them what they meant by their comments? Sometimes bitchy groups of girls can be disbanded/fractured simply by asking them straight out what they meant because their bitchiness is brought out into the open for all the world to see!
Stand up for yourself too. When that girl said your muscles were disgusting, you should've asked her why she said that. Get to the root of where she's coming from, totally dis-arm her. Some people are so insecure that they get off on making borderline snide remarks to make themselves feel better. Throw it back on them, get them to explain themselves. End result is you'll make them look like the fools they are

mood

easterroad wrote: »

Hi all. So I've never really had any problems picking up girls or starting relationships with them when living abroad. I've spent the majority of the last 10 years in UK and Canada. I'm 30 now. I've been home a year now and for some reason Irish girls don't seem to find me attractive at all. Or at least that's the impression I'm getting.
I was out a couple of weeks ago chatting to a girl and she touched my arm for some reason and then said "oh you're muscley that's disgusting". Strange thing to say to a stranger don't you think? I work out and keep fit but I'm not a steroid freak or anything.
Also what really got me recently is that a girl at work that I go out with sometimes (she's German) sits with a group of irish girls in the canteen, and all of them (who i've never met) have said to her that they think I'm weird, that I look weird, one of them even said she "can't look at me". I should note that none of these girls are particularly attractive so I don't know why they think they're better than me. I don't think I look weird at all. I've had some really pretty girlfriends in the past too. I'm not vain at all either, and I'm always nice to everyone I meet, no matter where they're from.
Is it just the way women are here in Dublin? My accent is a bit messed up from being abroad too, maybe they don't like that? I never go on about where I've lived either, I know that can annoy people.
I really don't get it, my mother has never had the pleasure of meeting an Irish girlfriend of mine, because I haven't had one since I'm a teenager, and I can't help thinking some of my friends/family think I'm some sort of oddball that can't get Irish girls. Maybe that's what I am? I don't know... I mean the complications of foreign girls can get a bit much, with location, where you will live in the future etc., so I'd like nothing more than to meet a girl from the same background.
I know it's a stupid "problem" and this rant probably doesn't make much sense but any advice or explanations or analysis would be fantastic.
Oh and I'm not dissing Irish girls at all, and I don't want the thread to devolve into that. If all my friends have Irish girlfriends, obviously it's me with the problem, not Irish girls.
Thanks y'all!

All the girls you talked about sound very childish. Are they much younger than you? It sounds like the most likely answer!

ash23

Maybe if you'd stop expecting all Irish girls to be the same, you'd meet some nice ones.

The girls you've mentioned sound like knobs and if those are the types you tend to meet, then you need to look at where you socialise.
If you go to a mart, you'll meet cows.

Most of my mates are normal and nice but we avoid certain places because it's full of total muppets.

Get yourself down to a local pub where you'll meet more down to earth folks than the pretentious silly bints you seem to be encountering (because in fairness they'd consider themselves much too good to pull on a pair of jeans and a tee and head out for a pint to the local. It's all about being seen dahling ).

I know LOADS of Irish girls and none of them are as you describe!

dublingal80

ya seem to care about what girls think, that you dont know.

Feck em! if you hear anything negative, move on. not everyone is going to be attracted to you, physically or mentally but you will find someone who is

and i can promise you, us irish girls are not all the same!

LegacyUser

op could it be that you look very "irish" ? I'm a mid 20s woman, deathly pale (i refuse to wear fake tan), but i have very dark features, not being an arrogant cow here but, 90% of the men who approach me or flirt with me on a night out are "foreign", they find the combination of pale skin/dark features very striking(and attractive) because in their country its uncommon i guess. Irish men on the other hand* seem to think im just another pasty irish girl who didn't even bother putting on fake tan and i don't even register on their radar. *(in saying that there are some lovely irish men out there who don't buy into all this faux american bulls**** which is rife in ireland and particularly dublin at the moment, they are however getting harder and harder to find)

Anyway my point is in there somewhere..its all about perception.

The world is a big place with millions of women so don't narrow your choices down to just the handful of women on this little rock who will most likely melt your brain more then your heart.

also agree with this, i wouldn't turn my back on "foreign" girls op, theres loads of lovely foreign girls in ireland(who find irish men very attractive), who tend to be much more open and friendly than a large proportion of the irish girls, it seems silly to dismiss them just because of "the complications"*

* of course all of this also applies to irish men

I moved to dublin 3 years ago and op it really is a minefield in terms of going out, this whole d4/americanised culture is rife, i really agree with ash 23 on this one, in dublin in particular it really really depends on where you're socialising.

I was out a couple of weeks ago chatting to a girl and she touched my arm for some reason and then said "oh you're muscley that's disgusting

OP ive had girls i don't know come up to me and say "oh my god, you're sooo pale, would you not wear some tan, you'd look so much prettier" and im a woman for christ sake!

"Down to earth" Bars are the way to go, just stay away from the "upmarket" clubs/pubs, full of muppets.

Wagon

The women in your workplace? That was just back luck, you can run into geebags anywhere.

Avoid clubs though! All the arseholes in dublin cultivate in clubs. Walk past and laugh at them. They deserve it.

Motley Crue

OP I had a similar situation to yourself. Growing up in Ireland I felt I didn't have a lot of female attention, and when I moved to another country, I got that kind of attention.

Now, some will say that the accent and the fact that I was an Irishman in a place were you wouldn't normally find an Irishman helped, but there was certainly something I enjoyed (and who wouldn't) about being "different" and "against the norm"

I didn't even realise it myself until after a few months, but these girls just loved the person I represented, as opposed to me personally. Well, most of them did, I did find someone special...but still, I relate to what you are saying, it seemed that in Ireland I was just "another Irishman" where as elsewhere I was "a stranger, someone with an unknown past, a blank canvas etc....and some women find that erotic"

BarryCreed

Motley Crue wrote: »

OP I had a similar situation to yourself. Growing up in Ireland I felt I didn't have a lot of female attention, and when I moved to another country, I got that kind of attention.

Now, some will say that the accent and the fact that I was an Irishman in a place were you wouldn't normally find an Irishman helped, but there was certainly something I enjoyed (and who wouldn't) about being "different" and "against the norm"

I didn't even realise it myself until after a few months, but these girls just loved the person I represented, as opposed to me personally. Well, most of them did, I did find someone special...but still, I relate to what you are saying, it seemed that in Ireland I was just "another Irishman" where as elsewhere I was "a stranger, someone with an unknown past, a blank canvas etc....and some women find that erotic"

Me too. I had a similar situation. I always had more luck with foreign women. Not that I don't have luck with the Irish, but maybe it was what I represented as to who I actually was. I never thought of it like that...

LegacyUser

Hi,

You do sound like a very decent guy OP.

I'd like to share my own experience as a man of 28 years of age. I am going to be far more blunt here, cutting out all PC considerations and give you my honest opinion. I have dated more foreign women than Irish women. By and large, Irish women are muppets on the whole. This is just life experience. They judge guys based on social status, money etc more than other foreign girls. They hold a sense of superiority towards Irish men and can be quite bitchy and engage in put down behaviour. Now this includes some of my female friends, I love them as friends but on occassion their highly critical talk of those Irish men they are dating has dumbfounded me.

I dont think they are worth it, and yeah, many of them think they are far better looking than they actually are. There are far more prettier girls throughout europe who are much more down to earth. Leave the Irish girls to themselves or to those poor souls out there who become their bitches, doing everything they are told to do.

Good Luck OP

P.S. You'll get loads of replies here saying you are going to the wrong places etc etc...
But to be honest, Irish girls on the whole aren't a great sort for a romantic relationship

LegacyUser

Hi,

You do sound like a very decent guy OP.

I'd like to share my own experience as a man of 28 years of age. I am going to be far more blunt here, cutting out all PC considerations and give you my honest opinion. I have dated more foreign women than Irish women. By and large, Irish women are muppets on the whole. This is just life experience. They judge guys based on social status, money etc more than other foreign girls. They hold a sense of superiority towards Irish men and can be quite bitchy and engage in put down behaviour. Now this includes some of my female friends, I love them as friends but on occassion their highly critical talk of those Irish men they are dating has dumbfounded me.

I dont think they are worth it, and yeah, many of them think they are far better looking than they actually are. There are far more prettier girls throughout europe who are much more down to earth. Leave the Irish girls to themselves or to those poor souls out there who become their bitches, doing everything they are told to do.

Good Luck OP

P.S. You'll get loads of replies here saying you are going to the wrong places etc etc...
But to be honest, Irish girls on the whole aren't a great sort for a romantic relationship

oh i have to laugh at this, irish men and women make it so hard for themselves!!, its a vicious circle, yes a lot of irish women are bi***es and will put down guys who try approach them, which leads to the nice irish men not bothering to approach any more irish women "'cos they're bi***es", so the only men who will hit on the irish women are the irish arrogant twats of men, which leads to the irish women being so fed up of being hit on by arrogant sleazy irish men that they are immediately defensive with any irish men who hit on them...and so the cycle begins again!!, its a catch 22 situation, you're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't!

They hold a sense of superiority towards Irish men and can be quite bitchy and engage in put down behaviour

...hmm unlike the attitude of
superiority you have over irish women which you've just displayed ....oh and of course you didn't put down any irish women in that post...oh wait, yes you did....

I have dated more foreign women than Irish women. By and large, Irish women are muppets on the whole. This is just life experience.

This works both ways, i've dated wayyy more foreign guys than irish, and in my experience the irish men i've dated have been so cold, completely unable to open up emotionally, and just so bloody afraid to show any kind of tenderness it just baffled me, so i just stopped dating them. I get approached by foreign guys so i date foreign guys, (i'd love it if i found a nice irish guy but i won't hold by breath) All of my worst dating experiences have been with irish men but you know what, i don't hold any grudges/bitterness towards irish men, i don't judge irish men, whats the point? I just don't bother dating them anymore, problem solved!. I just don't get why some irish men are so bitter towards irish women, if you don't like irish women then don't date them!

jknnnnnnnnnnn

jknnnnnnnnnnn wrote: »

They hold a sense of superiority towards Irish men and can be quite bitchy and engage in put down behaviour. Now this includes some of my female friends...
Leave the Irish girls to themselves or to those poor souls out there who become their bitches, doing everything they are told to do.
...
But to be honest, Irish girls on the whole aren't a great sort for a romantic relationship

lol. I feel sorry for your "friends". Have you considered getting professional help?

well OP, I don't think you should run to take advice from someone this bitter

I do think you're in the wrong places. I also suggest what ash said

Emme

unregmary wrote: »

This works both ways, i've dated wayyy more foreign guys than irish, and in my experience the irish men i've dated have been so cold, completely unable to open up emotionally, and just so bloody afraid to show any kind of tenderness it just baffled me, so i just stopped dating them. I get approached by foreign guys so i date foreign guys, (i'd love it if i found a nice irish guy but i won't hold by breath) All of my worst dating experiences have been with irish men but you know what, i don't hold any grudges/bitterness towards irish men, i don't judge irish men, whats the point? I just don't bother dating them anymore, problem solved!. I just don't get why some irish men are so bitter towards irish women, if you don't like irish women then don't date them!

This post is freaky - it could have been me who wrote it because these are exactly my experiences with Irish men. I could count on one hand the number of Irish men who have approached me this year, whereas I find foreign men very friendly. Another thing about foreign men is that they are more likely to engage with a woman as a person rather than seeing her a piece of meat they can lay on a slab (bed :rolleyes:) at the end of the night.

I think a lot of decent Irish guys and women have given up on the social scene here and don't bother going out, instead they focus on their friends and their hobbies.

Ickle Magoo

jknnnnnnnnnnn wrote: »

P.S. You'll get loads of replies here saying you are going to the wrong places etc etc...
But to be honest, Irish girls on the whole aren't a great sort for a romantic relationship

Lol, that post just screams of being bitterly unsuccessful with irish women. :pac:

OP,

Saying you look disgusting is rude, saying you look weird is rude (did you hear that first hand btw? Or is it a girl that fancies you telling you all the other girls, ie her competition, think you look weird?). You get rude people everywhere, I don't think Ireland has any greater a share in them (and obviously I'm not Irish so I say that as an impartial observer) but in Dublin they do tend to congregate in particular establishments. So, if you want to find a long-term love interest then A) stop worrying about what mammy thinks Take up hobbies and interests you like and give the opportunity to meet like minded people.

Best of luck!

LegacyUser

I'm a foreign girl living here in Ireland for 8 years. My experience is that in that position you're automatically going to be more attractive to people. So the traits I have, my accent etc doesn't stand out at home but it does here and it gets me attention.

Having said that, the attention I get from Irish men is very off-putting. As someone said, Irish men don't know how to approach a woman properly or speak to her like she's a human being. They have to get really drunk and then they become really sleazy (at least the ones I've met). I think it's a function of pubs and clubs (and alcohol).

I've seen bitchy Irish women too - and I think, again, it's down to the alcohol consumed. However, there are places you go where you will find more bitchy women and sleazier men. There are some places where you can find nice normal people not drunk off their heads looking for good conversation and to meet interesting people.

Irish men, from my experience, when sober cannot talk to women. As someone said, they cannot open up. They are really difficult to form relationships with.

I also think part of the problem is that many men look for super models (when they are not in that league themselves) and then get surprised when they are rejected. They think they can find the stunning woman who is nice and intelligent and then get shocked when they get bitchy in return or shallow! If you are being shallow in who you approach why are you surprised that you get shallow back?

My advice OP is to seek out somewhere that is not typically Irish and go with the view of meeting new people and new friends and to have interesting conversations. I think you'll find it much more enjoyable.

Drops of Jupiter

Hi OP,

Perhaps it is just taking you some time to settle here and get used to how things work dating wise etc. The rude comments are just that rude and hurtful. I would not see this rudeness as a common trait among Irish women.

The relationship between the sexes in Ireland baffles me sometimes. I do think there are some unusual attitudes/mis-undersandings on both sides which does not make for harmonoius relations. Throw alcohol into the mix and it can be minefield.

Like I said it works both ways. There is this faux American "mean girls" culture amoung certain Irish women where they are bitchy and rude to everyone. However this is a relatively small minority and not representative of all Irishwomen. You can judge for yourself from some of the other posters some of the attitudes of Irish men towards women here. It is even more apparent on some of the other forums where sexist/degrading/objectifiying remarks are the norm for any topics relatating to a female and not these guys are not 16! However like I said not all Irish men are like this (thankfully).

Take some time and experiment in terms of places you go etc. I assure you will find some decent Irish women. Stop worrying and good luck:D

Drops of Jupiter

.

"Having said that, the attention I get from Irish men is very off-putting. As someone said, Irish men don't know how to approach a woman properly or speak to her like she's a human being. They have to get really drunk and then they become really sleazy (at least the ones I've met). I think it's a function of pubs and clubs (and alcohol)."

Completely agree!


"I also think part of the problem is that many men look for super models (when they are not in that league themselves) and then get surprised when they are rejected"

So true!

"My advice OP is to seek out somewhere that is not typically Irish and go with the view of meeting new people and new friends and to have interesting conversations. I think you'll find it much more enjoyable.[/QUOTE]

Definetely.

Monkey61

Ah yes the usual "Irish women are rubbish" thing rears it's ugly head again. I've said it once and I'll say it again - this does seem to be purely an internet phenomenon as I have never once encountered this opinion in real life.

Out of all of my friends, the majority of Irish guys are going out with Irish girls and visa versa. Now I am not generalising, I am only speaking from what I have experienced here, but the only Irish guys that I know that are going out with foreign girls are ones that had very poor social skills when it came to talking to women, really hadn't a clue and stood a much better chance with girls where there was a bit of a language barrier and different cultural norms. I have also noticed a trend for very hasty engagements within these couples and a lot of emphasis being placed on money etc. But that is just my experience and I would be mad to tar all "foreign women" with the same brush because of it.

Op is it possible that from being away too long you just don't understand the Irish sense of humour, banter etc? It is the one thing that I have noticed living in the UK, particularly with Southern English people, is that they constantly think that I am being rude or saying terribly inappropriate things, when I would be taking the piss in an obviously jokey or friendly way and it can be quite difficult to understand why they don't get the concept of banter. This generally applies to North Americans too. What that girl said to you sounds so bizarre that I am inclined to believe that maybe it was some kind of attempt at flirting that just fell flat.

Maybe you do just need to get used to the Irish again. And in the meantime if you want to meet girls, as others have said, avoid clubs. Too much alcohol, plus loud music and general stress do not make for happy date finding.

Ickle Magoo

Monkey61 wrote: »

but the only Irish guys that I know that are going out with foreign girls are ones that had very poor social skills when it came to talking to women,

Clearly as a non-irish person married to an irishman and being friends with lots of mixed nationality couples, I'd have to disagree. In our group of close friends there are three irish-to-irish and five irish-to-other nationality marriages so I think it's more down to demographic, opportunity (ie working or studying outside ireland) and, of course, personal preference...it's a bit of leap to assume foreign = language barrier or huge cultural differences....the OP has been in Canada & the UK.

Emme

Monkey61 wrote: »

Now I am not generalising, I am only speaking from what I have experienced here, but the only Irish guys that I know that are going out with foreign girls are ones that had very poor social skills when it came to talking to women, really hadn't a clue and stood a much better chance with girls where there was a bit of a language barrier and different cultural norms. I have also noticed a trend for very hasty engagements within these couples and a lot of emphasis being placed on money etc. But that is just my experience and I would be mad to tar all "foreign women" with the same brush because of it.

Does these couples you're thinking of meet face to face or on the internet? That is definitely not my perception or experience of Irish-Foreign partnerships. I know quite a few Irish-Foreign couples who met in college, travelling or through work - Irish-German, Irish-French, Irish-Italian, Irish-Japanese and Irish-Estonian. All concerned would have excellent social skills, above average intelligence and it's definitely not about money.

Peggypeg

Hey Hey,

Just to add my 2 cents. All of my Irish friends are going out with Irish people. However saying that they didn't just find each other when they decided they wanted to be in a relationship, they went out with loads of people before they found "the one". I really don't think Irish men are any more sleazy than others, I don't think Irish girls are any more bitchy than others but I do believe that certain places (pubs, clubs) attract the D4 orange burds that are so dispised over here. Like everyone else said just go out and have fun. You'll find someone eventually. I think Irish people on the whole are lovely and friendly. Also don't worry about the muscles, LOTS of my friends love them.

Monkey61

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Clearly as a non-irish person married to an irishman and being friends with lots of mixed nationality couples, I'd have to disagree. In our group of close friends there are three irish-to-irish and five irish-to-other nationality marriages so I think it's more down to demographic, opportunity (ie working or studying outside ireland) and, of course, personal preference...it's a bit of leap to assume foreign = language barrier or huge cultural differences....the OP has been in Canada & the UK.

Fair enough but that is just how it is with the ones that I know. All the girls had considerable language difficulties at the start of the relationships and all of them were looking for completely different things from the guys than any Irish girls that they had met were.

Which is why I said that I was basing this purely on my own personal experience and not making a generalisation!

And Emme - they all met face-to-face but, and this may be a major contributing factor in the ones that I know, all of the girls are ones that came to Ireland from impoverished backgrounds and countries - not from Western Europe, which possibly contributes to the wanting money and security factor!

Ickle Magoo

Monkey61 wrote: »

Fair enough but that is just how it is with the ones that I know. All the girls had considerable language difficulties at the start of the relationships and all of them were looking for completely different things from the guys than any Irish girls that they had met were.

Which is why I said that I was basing this purely on my own personal experience and not making a generalisation!

And Emme - they all met face-to-face but, and this may be a major contributing factor in the ones that I know, all of the girls are ones that came to Ireland from impoverished backgrounds and countries - not from Western Europe, which possibly contributes to the wanting money and security factor!

Well that could certainly influence things. I'm at the opposite end of the scale, I don't know any Irish-to-impoverished country couples.

LegacyUser

bluewolf wrote: »

lol. I feel sorry for your "friends". Have you considered getting professional help?

well OP, I don't think you should run to take advice from someone this bitter

I do think you're in the wrong places. I also suggest what ash said

You feel sorry for my "friends". Well ok, just to fill you in, I was in the pub with a few of them and one girl friend starting openely talking in front of the group about how crap her current boyfriend was in bed so she was thinking of dumping him after a year together. Another girl "friend" told us all how she was breaking up with her devoted boyfriend of 6 years because she was bored of him. She had a new boyfriend a week later, who had been in the pipeline, unbeknownst to her brokenhearted ex boyfriend. So yeah go ahead, feel sorry for them. But behaviours like these have made me question whether I even want to remain friends with them.

I am actually a polite and nice guy in person. I am just letting it all out here, thats what boards is for isnt it? Being honest. Many people I find here censor their thoughts for Political Correctness reasons. These are my honest thoughts.

LegacyUser

jknnnnnnnnnnn wrote: »

You feel sorry for my "friends". Well ok, just to fill you in, I was in the pub with a few of them and one girl friend starting openely talking in front of the group about how crap her current boyfriend was in bed so she was thinking of dumping him after a year together. Another girl "friend" told us all how she was breaking up with her devoted boyfriend of 6 years because she was bored of him. She had a new boyfriend a week later, who had been in the pipeline, unbeknownst to her brokenhearted ex boyfriend. So yeah go ahead, feel sorry for them. But behaviours like these have made me question whether I even want to remain friends with them.

If you had better judgement of character, you wouldn't have the hassle of being surrounded by people like these. Don't take it out on Irish women in general just because you've realised you're cr*p at picking good friends

Kimia

jknnnnnnnnnnn wrote: »

You feel sorry for my "friends". Well ok, just to fill you in, I was in the pub with a few of them and one girl friend starting openely talking in front of the group about how crap her current boyfriend was in bed so she was thinking of dumping him after a year together. Another girl "friend" told us all how she was breaking up with her devoted boyfriend of 6 years because she was bored of him. She had a new boyfriend a week later, who had been in the pipeline, unbeknownst to her brokenhearted ex boyfriend. So yeah go ahead, feel sorry for them. But behaviours like these have made me question whether I even want to remain friends with them.

I am actually a polite and nice guy in person. I am just letting it all out here, thats what boards is for isnt it? Being honest. Many people I find here censor their thoughts for Political Correctness reasons. These are my honest thoughts.

Just because you hang around with a pack of bítches doesn't mean that all Irish women are the same.

LegacyUser

Kimia wrote: »

Just because you hang around with a pack of bítches doesn't mean that all Irish women are the same.

The thing is, they are not normally bitches at all, in fact they are friends because they are nice people, usually. It seems when men are the topic, its no holds barred, put downs etc..

Victor

unregistered wrote: »

If you had better judgement of character, you wouldn't have the hassle of being surrounded by people like these. Don't take it out on Irish women in general just because you've realised you're cr*p at picking good friends

Can we be constructive and not (individually) judgemental?

magneticimpulse

I really hate being stereotyped that DUBLIN girls are all bitches. Im in France and when I chat to Irish guys (and i had an ex Dublin bf) they would complain about Dublin girls, saying they are all bitches. Forgetting that they were directly insulting me. Ex used to go on about how he would never date a girl from Dublin?? What? All his ex's were from other counties, Belfast, US etc. How is that attitude going to attract any girl, no matter where she is from? And especially if she is from Dublin.

Honestly if that is guys opinion I feel very sad for them as they are definitely looking or being in the wrong place. They must have a chip on their shoulder too. Im in France and yes I dont like French men, but I am still keeping an open mind.

Advice is join meetup.com There are plenty of nice groups on there to meet people that does not involve the Meat Market Pub scene. Also Couchsurfing.org as well. You just need to do sport, out door activities, hiking etc and you will meet more cultured interesting Irish women (and other nationalities too). Basically women who are nice and polite, as we do exist. Your just in the wrong place/wrong women at the moment.

Faith

jknnnnnnnnnnn wrote: »

Another girl "friend" told us all how she was breaking up with her devoted boyfriend of 6 years because she was bored of him.

Well, my half-Irish, half-German boyfriend of nearly two years recently broke up with me because he got "bored", so it's certainly not an Irish female only trait. It's just immaturity.

I honestly don't understand why the men of boards.ie have such problems with Irish women. I'm a born and bred Irish woman, and I'm very interested in Irish men. Foreign accents actually put me off completely, when English isn't their first language. I, and many women like me, can be found in normal bars having a drink and a good time. We're open to being politely approached and chatted to; we're less receptive to being leered at and groped by some jerk who's drank 12 pints that night. On that note, I'm only interested in men who can hold their drink well. Men who drink too much and act like fools are a turn off for most women. That's probably why many men feel so unsuccessful on nights out.

As so many others have said, OP, you're obviously looking in the wrong places to find women you like.

Emme

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Advice is join meetup.com There are plenty of nice groups on there to meet people that does not involve the Meat Market Pub scene. Also Couchsurfing.org as well. You just need to do sport, out door activities, hiking etc and you will meet more cultured interesting Irish women (and other nationalities too). Basically women who are nice and polite, as we do exist. Your just in the wrong place/wrong women at the moment.

Some of the meetup.com groups are good and I'm in a few of them. One thing I've noticed though is that several of the guys in meetup.com have girlfriends outside the groups but flirt with girls in the groups and try to get away with what they can - ie they'll have a one night stand if they can get away with it. I don't know if it only applies to the guys over 30, but it's definitely something for any women in meetup.com to watch out for.

I've given up on meeting somebody and am just focusing on friends and hobbies now. Much less stress.

reprazant

Interesting how this thread changed from why Irish women treated the OP so rudely and coldly compared with the foreign women, to Irish men being emotionally cold, unlike foreign men are unable to talk to women without alcohol, unlike foreign men are unable to treat women without being sleazy, are shallow, try to do the dirt and in general have poor social skills.

Interesting how he asked why he was being treated differently and got told what was wrong with Irish men.

One person said what a lot of ladies have said about the Irish men but from a male perspective and got abused for it.

Kimia

reprazant wrote: »

Interesting how this thread changed from why Irish women treated the OP so rudely and coldly compared with the foreign women, to Irish men being emotionally cold, unlike foreign men are unable to talk to women without alcohol, unlike foreign men are unable to treat women without being sleazy, are shallow, try to do the dirt and in general have poor social skills.

Interesting how he asked why he was being treated differently and got told what was wrong with Irish men.

One person said what a lot of ladies have said about the Irish men but from a male perspective and got abused for it.

That's mad, I thought the whole thread was about how horrible Irish women are!! :rolleyes:

reprazant

Kimia wrote: »

That's mad, I thought the whole thread was about how horrible Irish women are!! :rolleyes:

Really?

Other then the OP & jknnnnnnnnnnn, who said that?

The thread is mainly full of female posters saying what is wrong with Irish males.

In fact, the OP didn't say anything bad, just asked why is he getting treated differently, and as a reply, got told what was wrong with the Irish male.

kjl

jknnnnnnnnnnn wrote: »

The thing is, they are not normally bitches at all, in fact they are friends because they are nice people, usually. It seems when men are the topic, its no holds barred, put downs etc..

I agree with you, Irish girls have some sort of stick up their asses. Most of them are overweight and are so insecure that when a nice guy goes and says hello, the react by slagging them off.

Funny thing is, that when you get passed the bi%^hy exterior, you normally find a very insecure person on the inside who are paranoid about everything. God have you ever been to a beach with an Irish girl, you get about a million questions where you have to compare them to other girls.

Of course I am not painting all girls with the same brush, but most I meet are like this.

mood

Like someone said earlier I wound put it down to you being seen as 'different' when in a different country. They might like you accent, your paler skin etc. I think most people have more luck in a different country.

Raekwon

reprazant wrote: »

Interesting how this thread changed from why Irish women treated the OP so rudely and coldly compared with the foreign women, to Irish men being emotionally cold, unlike foreign men are unable to talk to women without alcohol, unlike foreign men are unable to treat women without being sleazy, are shallow, try to do the dirt and in general have poor social skills.

Interesting how he asked why he was being treated differently and got told what was wrong with Irish men.

One person said what a lot of ladies have said about the Irish men but from a male perspective and got abused for it.

It's fairly normal on boards to be honest, women posters always gang up together and twist whatever is said in their favour. The irony is actually hilarious considering the subject matter :pac:

Kimia

kjl wrote: »

I agree with you, Irish men have some sort of stick up their asses. Most of them are overweight and are so insecure that when a nice girl goes and says hello, the react by slagging them off.

Funny thing is, that when you get passed the bi%^hy exterior, you normally find a very insecure person on the inside who are paranoid about everything. God have you ever been to a beach with an Irish guy, you get about a million questions where you have to compare them to other men.

Of course I am not painting all men with the same brush, but most I meet are like this.

:rolleyes:

What a rude post. I hope this shows you how ignorant you sound.

kjl

Kimia wrote: »

:rolleyes:

What a rude post. I hope this shows you how ignorant you sound.

No, not at all. My point still stands.

Kimia

kjl wrote: »

No, not at all. My point still stands.

Ok, you're obviously ok with appearing to be a bitter women-hating creep! :rolleyes:

I just wish that the OP (and some very nasty sounding guys) would understand that there are nice, genuine Irish girls out there, ones that long to be in a relationship with a decent guy. Perhaps the bitterness of past rejections are putting the stops on any hopes of positive interaction?

kjl

Kimia wrote: »

Ok, you're obviously ok with appearing to be a bitter women-hating creep! :rolleyes:

I just wish that the OP (and some very nasty sounding guys) would understand that there are nice, genuine Irish girls out there, ones that long to be in a relationship with a decent guy. Perhaps the bitterness of past rejections are putting the stops on any hopes of positive interaction?

I don't hate women, I hate women who have are so insecure they feel the only way to make themselves feel better is to attack every guy who attempts to talk to them.

The OP is right, Irish girls are the only ones who do this. I'm sorry if you are unable to find a nice guy, but have you actually though of approaching guys yourself? Shy guys in this country have such a hard time its not even funny.

I been going out with Irish girls since I was 12 years old, but you know what, I prefer Asian or Polish girls because they are so much more down to earth. All I see when I see Irish girls is bitter.

Kimia

kjl wrote: »

I'm sorry if you are unable to find a nice guy, but have you actually though of approaching guys yourself? Shy guys in this country have such a hard time its not even funny.

Are you talking about me? I have a bf but thanks. And I'm far from shy! And I don't attack anyone! I'm just saying in general it would be nice if the Op and other guys like yourself could understand that not all Irish women are insecure, fat (you say yourself) bítches.

Emme

kjl wrote: »

I'm sorry if you are unable to find a nice guy, but have you actually though of approaching guys yourself? Shy guys in this country have such a hard time its not even funny.

Likewise shy women.

santana75

kjl wrote: »

I prefer Asian or Polish girls because they are so much more down to earth.

+1. Have to agree with this. Although to break it down even further, I have noticed a big difference between Dublin girls and those from the country. Country Girls seem to be more down to earth, less high maintence and in general, sounder.

LegacyUser

mood wrote: »

Like someone said earlier I wound put it down to you being seen as 'different' when in a different country. They might like you accent, your paler skin etc. I think most people have more luck in a different country.

Cmon I was hardly an exotic pearl in London, a mish-mash of all types, Irish people are about as un-exotic as you can get in the big smoke!
I guess the main thing is most of my friends here are settled, part of a couple, and i've no hope of meeting anyone through them anyway. I had a larger more varied circle of friends in the UK and would get invited to more parties, meet more people etc, all the time. I don't know many people like that here. I find it impossible to have a normal conversation with girls here, in bars and clubs etc, but that's probably just my own fault, I just don't have whatever gift it is you need to make an impression on girls in these situations here. I give up anyway. And I've been offered a contract back in London starting in a couple of months so I'll probably just go back.
To the person who said only people with no social skills have foreign girlfriends - well, I have tonnes of friends, all over Ireland, and the world. So I can't be doing that bad.

Drops of Jupiter

Yes, shy people have a hard time in this country.!

But as it is often left up to men to approach women shy guys can get very angry about their lack of success with women which results in their projecting all their anger onto women to compensate. "All women are stuck up bitches etc"

In my experience you rarely hear men who are successful with women calling them stuck up bitches/ugly/slappers. It's the one's who aren't successful who complain about them the most. Maybe the reverse is also true here where females are concerned.

It's sad that we have such negative attitudes towards each other here as Irish people. I have had negative experiences with Irish men but I wouldn't think they are representative of all men. I have also had very positive experiences with Irish and my preference has always been for Irish men over foreigners.

Sometimes there is such a lack of harmony amongst men and women in Ireland -like we don't value each other or something. I don't get it, I really don't. Is it some feminist backlash or something where the boundaries have been blured and the roles confused?

I have noticed though that "women bashing" on boards is socially acceptable but the slightest hint of "male bashing" the poster is jumped all over. Just an observation as a newbie! Irish women are constantly referred to as bints/cnuts/sluts/bitches in some forums. If women were to adopt the same attitude toward Irish men I don't think it would be taken lightly!

mood

easterroad wrote: »

Cmon I was hardly an exotic pearl in London, a mish-mash of all types, Irish people are about as un-exotic as you can get in the big smoke!
I guess the main thing is most of my friends here are settled, part of a couple, and i've no hope of meeting anyone through them anyway. I had a larger more varied circle of friends in the UK and would get invited to more parties, meet more people etc, all the time. I don't know many people like that here. I find it impossible to have a normal conversation with girls here, in bars and clubs etc, but that's probably just my own fault, I just don't have whatever gift it is you need to make an impression on girls in these situations here. I give up anyway. And I've been offered a contract back in London starting in a couple of months so I'll probably just go back.
To the person who said only people with no social skills have foreign girlfriends - well, I have tonnes of friends, all over Ireland, and the world. So I can't be doing that bad.

I think a lot of English people have a thing for Irish ascents so that is bound to help.