Ye can't beat a danger ****

beardybob

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.I must try it with a mates mother sometime.

orourkeda

beardybob wrote: »

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.I must try it with a mates mother sometime.

Its so exciting. Stick a cucumber up your arse and you'll have the **** of your life.

Ardennes1944

ye're weird

SoupyNorman

beardybob wrote: »

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.I must try it with a mates mother sometime.

Do you have to begin from a fully flacid position?

Doyler92

beardybob wrote: »

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.I must try it with a mates mother sometime.

I hope with all my heart you get caught.

Sexual harrasment I think that's called...?

Dravokivich

A recent plot line to a "Naughty America" vid?

Basq

beardybob wrote: »

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.

Unless you're after calling a geriatric.. if you do manage it, it's a pretty poor reflection on you tbh!

johnny_knoxvile

think thats dangerous? Try it with live wires around, or while defusing I.E.D's in Iraq...i live on the edge...of decancy.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

beardybob wrote: »

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.I must try it with a mates mother sometime.

Works better if you dial 999, report a fire, and leave the door on the latch while masturbating in the hall.

beardybob

Well I think its healthy. In fairness a good **** sorts everything out even a bad ride and especially a hang over. The cucumber sound a little too painfull think I'll stick to the shampoo bottle, no risk of it breaking.

beardybob

stevefinn wrote: »

ye're weird

You still read it

orourkeda

beardybob wrote: »

Well I think its healthy. In fairness a good **** sorts everything out even a bad ride and especially a hang over. The cucumber sound a little too painfull think I'll stick to the shampoo bottle, no risk of it breaking.

Try the electric tootbrush. That could work

beardybob

With or without toothpaste???

Kold

I prefer to sneak into someone's room whilst they're sleeping and **** over their face.

Kiera

This thread is awesome!

The ultimate danger **** is speeding past the guards, then pulling over and popping one off before they get to your window..

thetonynator

Should be automatically put in the list of great threads . . .

beardybob

I am certainly going to try the cop one that sounds deadly. sneak into the ladies and try get one out over the door or into cubicle beside, very risky

Ardennes1944

beardybob wrote: »

You still read it

yeah....so i could comment and call ye weird

kierank01

lmao

Kiera

kierank01 wrote: »

lamo

Laugh ass my off?

jab1

my first post on boards and its too ths topic,legendary stuff keep it up.

Fanny Wank

I always wondered id it OK to have an allied Irish in the car while stuck in traffic

That would be more an exhibitionist **** though

Threads about **** are great

Fanny Wank

SoupyNorman wrote: »

Do you have to begin from a fully flacid position?

I really hope not

I'd have to be almost there to even attempt this

In any case it's a suicide mission as the smell of jizz would give the show away even if you managed to knock one out in the allotted time

abouttobebanned

The smell of jizz? What kind of food are you eating man?

beardybob

I'm having one now

Odysseus

One of my clients, I'm a psychotherapist, was in a second hand book shop. Anyway he was reading something that aroused him. He cracked one off in the corner where no-one could see him. I really struggled to stay professional and and not say something like "good show Sir".

Panthro

Odysseus wrote: »

One of my clients, I'm a psychotherapist, was in a second hand book shop. Anyway he was reading something that aroused him. He cracked one off in the corner where no-one could see him. I really struggled to stay professional and and not say something like "good show Sir".

if you visit the same bookshop as the client, watch out for the book with the pages stuck together

AckwelFoley

beardybob wrote: »

if ye call someones name and see if ye can toss one out before they get into your room.I must try it with a mates mother sometime.

lol thats not a danger ****.

A danger **** is knocking one out in the back row seat of a carpet munchers convention and getting out of there before any of them in the row in front of you notices your juice in their hair

fulhamfanincork

What about **** into your sleeping girlfriends hand and then tickling her face

Shall I just leave?

Unique User Name

beardybob wrote: »

I am certainly going to try the cop one that sounds deadly. sneak into the ladies and try get one out over the door or into cubicle beside, very risky

Be very careful with this. This can back fire if you'll excuse the pun. Just ask George Mchael what happens if you try this near the law!!

ddef

A mate of mine was telling me how he put peanut butter on his sack n got his dog to lick his balls while he wanked.
he had one hell of a job gettin the white stuff outta the dogs hair before his mother got home.

abouttobebanned

And that has killed the thread. Thread dead.

filthymcnasty

Odysseus wrote: »

One of my clients, I'm a psychotherapist, was in a second hand book shop. Anyway he was reading something that aroused him. He cracked one off in the corner where no-one could see him. I really struggled to stay professional and and not say something like "good show Sir".

I knocked one out in a book shop one time, after reading something particularly filthy in the Farmers Journal.
When i recounted this yarn to my shrink, who was browsing the internet at the time, I knew i would be assured of confidentiality and sound advice.

Biggins

LOL
Classic AH thread.

Snowie

your all amintures.....

A danger **** is getting a hand job off your boss's wife while hes having dinner with his kids in the resaurant and your in the dry store with his wife......

Kiera

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

your all amintures.....

A danger **** is getting a hand job off your boss's wife while hes having dinner with his kids in the resaurant and your in the dry store with his wife......

Wouldnt be that dry after :P

Biggins

Kiera wrote: »

Wouldnt be that dry after :P

Depends if she's in the mood - or in the fridge!

Kiera

Biggins wrote: »

Depends if she's in the mood - or in the fridge!

I was talking about after he shot.......oh nevermind. Do i have to explain everything sex related to you, Smallins? :P

PeterIanStaker

Now this would be a danger ****!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Combat%20Jack

Biggins

Kiera wrote: »

I was talking about after he shot.......oh never mind. Do I have to explain everything sex related to you, Smallins? :P

Explain?
I prefer a hands on demonstration!

Odysseus

filthymcnasty wrote: »

I knocked one out in a book shop one time, after reading something particularly filthy in the Farmers Journal.
When i recounted this yarn to my shrink, who was browsing the internet at the time, I knew i would be assured of confidentiality and sound advice.

You would be, hence no name of the shop or the person. We write papers about clients all the time. God if it was a famers journal I think I would have referred the guy on.

Selected

In times of domestic stress, I usually go for a walk in the woods, find a tree, and choke the chicken. A little bit dangerous when you can hear approaching voices and barking dogs.

Works for me though.:o

Biggins

Selected wrote: »

In times of domestic stress, I usually go for a walk in the woods, find a tree, and choke the chicken. A little bit dangerous when you can hear approaching voices and barking dogs.

Works for me though.:o

What do you do to the poor tree - and what did it do to deserve it? :eek:
I can see environmentalists claiming date rape here be gawd!

Snowie

Kiera wrote: »

Wouldnt be that dry after :P

That's the Kps problem not mine.:)
:pac:

DazMarz

Even if you finished before the other person landed into the room, how do you explain the puddles of fresh semen on the floor/in your hands/on your trousers???

"Eh, a ghost came in my room... literally..."

Ilyushin76

yuck:mad:

Funkfield

What's the difference between an egg and a danger ****?

You can beat an egg.......

bigeasyeah

Ye cant beat DangerMouse.

Mr Benevolent

This is why people with beards are odd.

Biggins

Confab wrote: »

This is why people with beards are odd.

Poor Santa.