Odd Theory

Turkleton

Hey Ive just recently moved to Dublin and while walking the city I see many attractive girls and considering how **** the social scene is to meet people due to loud music and drunkenness Im really beginning to think why dont we just start talking to people during the day? I mean Im sure we all have done it men and women,been walking the street saw a woman/fella in front of ya,eyes meet slight smile but then due to shyness/embarrassment the head goes down and you carry on about your business.
How would people feel if someone just stopped to talk to them in the street? pretty freaked out id say and straight away be weary of intentions....this country is ****ed,unless your really lucky and meet someone as drunk as you in a pub or you have a friend who happens to know someone 'perfect' for you,your screwed yet everyday we pass by people we are attracted to,could be our perfect match but due to social retardedness we let them walk by....

miss5

Actually I agree with you, I have never thought the pub scene was a good way
of meeting someone considering your both drunk. A few months ago I saw this guy
on the street and we happened to be in the same place the following evening and
he asked me out, Obviously I said no because I have a boyfriend who I met through
friends but I do think it could be a good idea. It is an unusual concept here though
and may not always recieve a friendly response.

Daisies

I often think of this myself. Ive started to smile at guys I see regularly (in the DART station, that work in the smae shopping centre etc) who I think are good looking. However I am way too shy to actually go up to a guy on the street so Id love if someone approached me (although it would depend on my mood at the time)

entropi

I've fallen victim to this train of thought in the past also, see cute/interesting/beautiful woman, eyes meet and/or smiles exchanged yet nothing happens...

In a way, I would love to see a more American-ised system of just walking up to someone and start chatting and see where it leads (hopefully not screamed at for being some kind of wierdo:p) the fact that dating more than one person is pretty normal over there it gives them that extra boost in random chance encounters in any place possible.

Cianos

Having the balls to go up to a girl during the day time would in and of itself be attractive to girls I think. I've done it myself once or twice and it's gone ok :pac:

krudler

Its so ingrained in us that "socialising" is getting hammered to the point of talking rubbish and not being yourself and screaming into someones ear over the latest Lady Gaga track blaring at zombie raising levels of volume in a club that talking to someone outside the safe zone of a pub, club or outside Supermacs at 3am on a Saturday night is a completely alien concept to most Irish people. I was in America 2 years ago and went to a club, the difference between their drinking culture and ours is astounding, they go out to meet people, drinking is just something to do, here its the opposite. I was chatted up twice in broad daylight, once in a theme park, once in a supermarket of all places. The girl in the theme park just came over and sat beside me, said hi and asked where I was from, I was actually taken aback and almost didnt know how to react, it was such a novel concept that someone would strike up a conversation with a stranger completely out of the blue, and in a flirty way not in a "weathers nice" kinda of way in order to avoid an awkward silence.

Novella

It's actually really weird when you think about it, how closed off so many people are in this country when it comes to things like just having a conversation with a stranger.
Have you ever been standing at a bus stop, you and one other person, in complete and utter silence, or in an elevator? I think that has to be completely unnatural, yet no one ever says anything! I bet if two strangers were in an elevator and one of them said something like, "The weather has been really nice lately, hasn't it?" (What else is there to talk about really?! :pac:), the other person would think 'WTF'!

Personally, I love bonding with strangers! I go in to the Centra across the road every day or every second day and there's a guy who works there, no idea what his name is, but for the first few weeks, every time he'd say, "Want a bag?" and I'd always answer no. Now it's like our own little joke. One of us will always say, "No bag!". Makes me smile every single time.

miss5

Even my grandmother and her age group have commented on this.
In a waiting room people barely speak, yet fifty years ago people
were open to conversation. She cannot believe how silent people are.
I think socialising has become limited.

Beffy

The good ole fear of rejection gets us irish most of the time!

rannerap

i think meeting someone when your not drunk and in a social situation where normally they wouldnt have to talk to you is far more appealing,i met my oh that way,i worked in a shop,he came in a few times,talked to me and gave me his number,the fact that he actually had the balls to do that was an attraction as it never happens in Ireland,the other day i was on the bus to college and an old man beside me struck up a conversation about my phone,we chatted until i got to college about all sorts,how he used to cycle to wexford when he had holidays etc and although at first i did think it was a little odd this stranger started talking to me,i went with it,its happened me a few times,nearly always on the bus,nearly always an older person,which makes me think that its just our generation thats so closed off,its a bit sad really

homerun_homer

Everyone loves this in theory but not in practice. I imagine most girls would look at you like you have a gazillion heads if you said hello and tried to chat to them during a day in town.
There was a female poster here before who started a thread saying she got stopped by a guy who asked her out on the street after seeing her and being taken aback by her. She shot him down and said it was weird/creepy, then proceeded to say how people needed to take the chance more often. This hypocritical attitude defines for me how many people would view this situation if it happened to them.

As a guy I have been flattered and would continue to be flattered by someone who would do such a thing. But girls can be more defensive than us guys so don't always view it the same way and this is why it is not done more often. Our culture of meeting new people/potential partners is totally messed up.

Nervous Wreck

homerun_homer wrote: »

Everyone loves this in theory but not in practice. I imagine most girls would look at you like you have a gazillion heads if you said hello and tried to chat to them during a day in town.
There was a female poster here before who started a thread saying she got stopped by a guy who asked her out on the street after seeing her and being taken aback by her. She shot him down and said it was weird/creepy, then proceeded to say how people needed to take the chance more often. This to me defines how many people would view this situation - hypocritical.

As a guy I have been flattered and would continue to be flattered by someone who would do such a thing. But girls can be more defensive than us guys so don't always view it the same way and this is why it is not done more often. Our culture of meeting new people/potential partners is totally messed up.

The thing is, we don't know how to deal with the situation because it's not done more often. And I mean that from both sides. Women don't know how to handle being approached in the daytime because they think it's odd. Men don't know how to handle approaching women in the daytime because they've never done it and feel awkward.

I love talking to strangers. It's a nice rush to strike up a conversation with someone, though I generally only do it in a certain type of situation, never really just on the street. But I like being in any kinda situation where a stranger (irrespective of gender) just talks to you for no real reason. I like it when people just want to have a bit of a yarn. Mar shampla, I was doing a nightcourse recently and at one lecture, the guy sitting beside me started chatting to me about the lecturer and how boring he was. About 10 minutes later, he said "Right fúck this for a bag of donuts, I'm leggin it, cya again!" and bailed. That left me with a smile.

Turkleton

A lot of good points made, I believe it is just ingrained in our society and indeed we would benefit from a more Americanised system (not often you will hear me say that) but even there they have taken it to a new extreme (pick up artists etc)
It has just been really pissing me off how noone talks to anyone at all,It happens in the country too but it's just in Dublin Ive really noticed,on several occassions now while on the bus up people sit down beside you,straight away the earphones are in,I mean we are stuck together on the bus for a few hours whats the harm in talking a bit of ****e?
I love talking to strangers and do it regularly even in Dublin,waiting at traffic lights,bus stops etc but Id only do it with an older person....maybe it's shyness issue, but I cant see too many young people being responsive to it...the world has really just gone crazy. Humans are social creatures,we have many different ways/methods of communication. I mean people constantly harp on about going travelling to experience new cultures etc, but it's right on your doorstep. Everybody is different,has different views on things,interesting theorys,aspects on certain things...yet we are oblivious to it!

If this was after hours....you would have to reply....this is Ireland!!!!...men talking/chatting up women while they were SOBER!!!!!!!!!!!....it'd never catch on.

I was chatted up in the supermarket recently which i thought it was nice and if i hadn't already been in a relationship i would have responded.

This is what he did...i was looking at some cream fresh and so was he...he started the conversation by talking about the different brands then he said i like to cook at the weekend because its hard to motivate yourself to cook for one.( i though that was cool.. he had managed to get across i am single and i can cook all in the one sentence )...he then told me about the recipe he was going to cook and asked me what i was cooking..and so on

So you could try chatting to women in the supermarket it might work