relationship with parents

ERR!

hey,

Just thinking here to myself about my relationship with my parents... seeing if im closer to my mum or dad or both!

Im 22 I have two older brothers(23 and 28) and I think im closer to my mum cant really seem to talk to my dad about much.. it's like we just dont have much in common.

I dont live at home live out for college and my mum would ring me once a week and if i dont go home at the weekends I wouldn't talk to my dad for weeks till I go home.Is that usual for girls? or just me?:P

So was wondering if I could get a few opinions from people on there relationship with their parents.. mention where you are in family, how many bros and sis and if you live at home or not!!

thanks guys

princess-lala

Im the middle child of 3 and the only girl.

The only one living at home and love it

I get on great with both my parents, didnt speak to my dad for 11 months last year until he had a heart attack in December! Im a real daddys girl though so it was really weird not speaking!

My mam and myself get on so well, I speak to both my parents during the day when Im working.

Daisies

Im 23 and the oldest of 4. I've been living away from home for about 6 years now between college and working. Like OP I could go weeks without talking to my Dad as he would never ring me unless he wanted me to sort a present out for my Mam or needed me to get something in Dublin that he cant get in Galway.
Mam on the other hand would ring me every 2nd or 3rd day. Now we'd never get into deep and meaningful conversations but we would check in on each other

ERR!

Daisies wrote: »

Im 23 and the oldest of 4. I've been living away from home for about 6 years now between college and working. Like OP I could go weeks without talking to my Dad as he would never ring me unless he wanted me to sort a present out for my Mam or needed me to get something in Dublin that he cant get in Galway.
Mam on the other hand would ring me every 2nd or 3rd day. Now we'd never get into deep and meaningful conversations but we would check in on each other

Pretty much the exact same with me.... whats your relationship like with siblings?

niceoneted

I'm female, 4th of 5 - 3 older sisters and a younger brother. 3 older quite close in age then gap to me and gap to bro.
Living away from home about 17 yrs. I get on much better with my dad and always have. In fact I always thought my mother was jealous of how well we get on. We've had our ups and downs. Dad would ring me a fair bit. I talk to my mum too but I nearly always end up wound up after the call.
I would be centre of the family in relation to siblings as in I would get on the best with them all, all confide heavily in me and all ring me a lot. There are some tensions between the others at times.

Daisies

ERR! wrote: »

Pretty much the exact same with me.... whats your relationship like with siblings?

OK in small doses. I think if I lived at home with them we would not get on at all. The short trips mean they dont have enough time to really annoy me.

ERR!

Daisies wrote: »

OK in small doses. I think if I lived at home with them we would not get on at all. The short trips mean they dont have enough time to really annoy me.

yea true would you ring and text them while your up here? or is the only form of contact when you go home?

Daisies

ERR! wrote: »

yea true would you ring and text them while your up here? or is the only form of contact when you go home?

We're not particularly close. I wouldnt confide in them at all really, nor them in me. Id only really be in contact with them when I go home. Id only really hear from them when im in Dublin if 1) they need directions to somewhere in Dublin 2) If my sister nearest in age to me is at home alone and bored or 3) If they need some of my clothes

storm2811

middle child with two brothers,one older one younger!
Still livin at home so talk to my mam alot obv:p but we can usually chat about somethin for ages aswell!
never really talked to my dad as much though but was still a daddy's girl:pac:
get on well enough with my brothers aswell,more the younger one though since my older bro moved out..but still chat to him about once a week?
fairly close with all of em suppose:rolleyes:

ERR!

Daisies wrote: »

We're not particularly close. I wouldnt confide in them at all really, nor them in me. Id only really be in contact with them when I go home. Id only really hear from them when im in Dublin if 1) they need directions to somewhere in Dublin 2) If my sister nearest in age to me is at home alone and bored or 3) If they need some of my clothes

nice to know Im not the only one... I always see these perfect families.. like a lot of my friends would be close with their bros n sisters but im not particulary close...like we get on fine just yet again run out of things to say.. Iv always felt a bit left out anyway cos im the only girl and the 2 bros get on and talk more.. my dad would also play golf with them etc

Fago!

I get on like a house on fire with my mam. We talk, laugh, send each other funny texts, she confides in me and I her, we're practically mates.

Never really clicked with my dad. My dad is kinda disappointed because I'm not like "a lad". I don't play sport, I'm a geek, he's never seen me with a "Bird" or a "mot" pretty sure he thinks I'm gay.... We just never talk or bond. Maybe because he's a sap.

I was always under the impression boys got on better with their mammy, and girls with their dad.

rainbow kirby

I'm 25 and the eldest of 3 (brother is 22 and sister is 17). I still live at home, for financial reasons while I finish my masters. My sister is still at home too, and my brother moved in with his GF about 6 months ago.

My relationship with my parents is pretty good, I get on much better with my mum than I do with my dad though. There's a bit of a personality clash between me and him, sometimes I think that deep down he's disappointed that his older daughter is not exactly stereotypically girly and not hugely interested in settling down and starting a family. I get on pretty well with my siblings too, particularly with my sister. I used to fight a lot with my brother when we were younger, but that's probably down to us being close in age more than anything else.

Daisies

ERR! wrote: »

nice to know Im not the only one... I always see these perfect families.. like a lot of my friends would be close with their bros n sisters but im not particulary close...like we get on fine just yet again run out of things to say.. Iv always felt a bit left out anyway cos im the only girl and the 2 bros get on and talk more.. my dad would also play golf with them etc

I know how you feel. All my friends are the same and all my cousins are really close to their siblings. My sisters are quite close to my parents coz they still live at home and my brother is the peata of the family coz he's the youngest and the only lad

lil'bug

i left home at 18 and i've never been back,there was some really bad blood between me my sister and my mam. it was the best thing i ever did

still have nothing to do with them

ERR!

rainbow kirby wrote: »

I'm 25 and the eldest of 3 (brother is 22 and sister is 17). I still live at home, for financial reasons while I finish my masters. My sister is still at home too, and my brother moved in with his GF about 6 months ago.

My relationship with my parents is pretty good, I get on much better with my mum than I do with my dad though. There's a bit of a personality clash between me and him, sometimes I think that deep down he's disappointed that his older daughter is not exactly stereotypically girly and not hugely interested in settling down and starting a family. I get on pretty well with my siblings too, particularly with my sister. I used to fight a lot with my brother when we were younger, but that's probably down to us being close in age more than anything else.

I hear you on the age gap being too close exact same with my bro hes 18 months older and we could not be in the same room as each other when we were younger we would kill each other!! we get on grand now!!! but nothing too close like wouldnt text him or all him during the week to se how he is!

ERR!

Fago! wrote: »

I get on like a house on fire with my mam. We talk, laugh, send each other funny texts, she confides in me and I her, we're practically mates.

Never really clicked with my dad. My dad is kinda disappointed because I'm not like "a lad". I don't play sport, I'm a geek, he's never seen me with a "Bird" or a "mot" pretty sure he thinks I'm gay.... We just never talk or bond. Maybe because he's a sap.

I was always under the impression boys got on better with their mammy, and girls with their dad.

parents expectations are not cool

ERR!

lil'bug wrote: »

i left home at 18 and i've never been back,there was some really bad blood between me my sister and my mam. it was the best thing i ever did

still have nothing to do with them

ugh at least its worked out good 4 you..... do they ever try contact you?

Panthro

i get on really well with my mother, we talk about everything and anything, she rings me a few times a week to "see what the craic is".
dad on the other hand, well the parents split up years ago as dad is fond of the beer, i never had him emotionally growing up and never communicated with him on any level other than "howya".
the other day in fact, after months of refusing to even visit the oul sod i called over and expained in no uncertain tems to him why i find it so difficult to talk to him.i told him he scared the absolute sh!t out of me as a child, he had no respect for my mother, and basically i think hes a thundering cnut.
he apologised for scaring me, then went on a rant of how much a bitch mam is, i stopped him on that note, and said look, you understand now my reasoning, my peace has been made.
i now know i cant go to dad for emotional love or support, so in other words:
dad is like an empty well, and after years of going to that well full of hope that i can fill up my bucket, i now realise that well is empty, and theres not a thing i can do about it.

Acoshla

I'm an only child (well, I have a half sister but she's a little b*tch), so I'm spoiled rotten for a start My parents split up when I was 6 but are good friends. It was just me and Mom in the house until I moved for college at 18, but I was home every weekend, would see Dad then too. My Mom and I are soooo close, I talk to her at least once a day, normally about 3 or 4 though, this is so gay but I'm 25, I live with my boyfriend, and every morning that I'm working she calls me to make sure I'm up

Boyfriends always have had to accept that she is my best friend and is a huge part of my life, I make no major decisions without consulting her. I'm going on holiday with my boyfriend next month and the day he leaves Mom is coming over to meet me for another 5 days. We look pretty much identical, have similar style, humour, everything, I'm even starting a business making cakes, something she always wanted to do and had told me everything I know.

My Dad is brilliant too, well, kinda. He's incredibly selfish but I am his pet, I'm the only person in this world that he will do selfless things for. My half sister is his but she is very disrespectful to him and so he really obviously favours me, she only contacts him when she wants money. A few days ago me and the sister had a minor tiff (her fault) and she has now deleted me from her facebook, oh how I wish I had a real sister! :rolleyes:

Dudess

I had a VERY strained relationship with my dad when I was younger, but we get on fairly well now. I find it hard to get close to him though. My mum - oh amazing woman. Always adored her and feel lucky and privileged to have such a wonderful mother.

Funnily enough, I was visiting them tonight and conversation turned to the fact that my grandad's anniversary is coming up. He died suddenly and quite young - my dad made the comment that something like that makes you realise how you should try to be nice to people as much as possible. I know what he meant by that - he and my grandad weren't on great terms when he died (nothing particularly serious mind - probably worked up by my dad since into something worse than it was). So I just said, in an attempt to make him feel better, "I'm sure your father went to his grave thinking his oldest boy was all right "

My dad said nothing - he just looked so sad...

StandardAngel

Im close to both my parents although i talk to my ma more, we are more like friends sometimes and go shopping when im off work.
Im still a daddys girl though, love my daddy

pearliefan

I'm real close to my mam but I could easily go a week or two without talking to her. If I need advice I'll call her and sometimes we'd have an auld chat on the phone, but otherwise we don't really talk while I'm at college! Whenever I'm home for the weekend then though we have great chats! I can tell her anything, and I generally do as she gives great advice! and loves to hear all the goss anyway :P

My Dad, I'm pretty close to, but not half as close. I'd tell him lotsa stuff, but not loads. We get on pretty well, but it's kinda strange sometimes. He would ring me if I don't come home for the weekend and I'd just tell what I'd been up to during the week, but it's a bit of an awkward chat. I still like that he calls me though! I could easily go a few weeks without talking to him, but I love seeing him when I'm back though, even just for one of those hugs

WanderingSoul

I am quite close to my Mum in that I would talk to her about things I wouldn't talk to my father about. We are very alike when it comes to personality, humor, tolerance, outlook, how emotional we are, need for independence, areas of interest, bluntness/tactfulness etc. so we get on very well and we have no significant conflicting views. The only things we don't really have in common is music and sport. I would feel I could talk to her about a lot and if I was worried about something and wanted to say something about it to one of my parents I would choose her.

My Father travels a lot for business and a lot of the time it seems like he isn't there even when he's home. I wouldn't be that emotionally close to him because he can be away for 3 weeks at a time since I was 2 years old so we never really bonded emotionally. That said, we get on very well even though we aren't that close. Sometimes he pushes me just a bit too hard which I don't appreciate.

So really I get on well enough with both my Mum and Father though I'm closer to the former.


EDIT: Reading back through my post I noticed that I call my Father "Father" as opposed to a more colloquial term like "Dad" which kind of reflects my lack of emotional bond with him.

Ickle Magoo

Hmmm, complicated one. I'm the third of five, adopted (no idea who my bio parents are) and the same couple raised just myself and one older sibling, a sister...

I'm very, very close to my sister...she'd be my best friend and we speak daily. I love my parents to bits and they are really lovely people but they wouldn't be the kind of people I would be friends with, if we were peers. We don't have much in common but we get on well and speak every couple of days. I haven't lived at home for 17yrs and haven't lived within 200miles of them for 8yrs so that probably helps. :pac:

SeekUp

I'm the youngest of three and the only girl. My brothers are both from previous marriages and I'm quite a bit younger -- 10 years younger than my youngest older brother.

I got on great with both of my parents. A couple of years into college I started thinking of them more as people than just as parents, y'know? I'd talk to my mom every day, just to shoot the breeze. I'd catch my dad a couple of times a week - whenever he'd answer the phone or something - and we'd just chit chat as well, although mostly about sports and work and what not.

Things are different now, but I usually talk to my dad once a week or once every couple of weeks. He's also gotten used to email, so we'll email during the workday.

I feel sad sometimes when I hear how harshly my friends talk to their parents or how negatively they think of them. I've been really lucky in that respect, that I actually liked my parents, and I always felt as if they respected me and my choices, and that they supported me in whatever I did.

Contessa Raven

I'm an only child. My parents split up when I was 14. I lived with my mam until I was 16 and then I moved in with my dad.

I have the best relationship with my dad. We're really good friends as well as Father and Daughter. I moved to the U.K for my final year of college this year and I'm always in touch with him. I can literally talk to my dad about anything. I am deffo a Daddy's Girl.

I kinda get on with my mam. She's difficult. Very stubborn and set in her ways and she has an alcohol issue. I had to leave because the fights were constant. Since I've moved out of her house (I'm 22 now so, 6 years!) we've gotten along better but still not fantastically. We get along for weeks sometimes months at a time and then BAM! We'll have a massive falling out. It gets really exhausting.

I do love her. She's my mam. But our personalities definitely clash. Big time! I wish we could get along better.

Pretty_Pistol

Relationship with both is good for the most part. I like to spend time with both even if it's just to go shopping. For important stuff (college, work, travelling) I go to my Mam. I don't talk to her about my friends, dating, boyfriends or have heart to hearts as she can't keep secrets and is very nosey.

I have the same personality as my Dads brother which is very different to my Mam. She's an extrovert while I'm more of an introvert so we approach and think of things very differently which causes conflict. My Dads more of a laugh and we're more alike. Not close to my siblings.