Invent something useless!

landsleaving

Like a de-cooker, for when you change your mind about dinner.

Or swimming caps for fish

Toasty113

I'll invent a machine that destroys itself.

I'll call it the government!

<drummer stays silent>

<Toasty is shamed off the stage>

ocokev

How about indicators on Mercs and BMWs.

landsleaving

You're all very political.

I'm inventing a device that keeps such conspiracies away from my mind. It'll be made of tin foil and I'll wear it on my he..

Oh wait.

Sarky

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bAmF2UT3xE

cyberwolf77

I have invented the vacuum dirtier. Turn it on and it sprays dirt all over the place.

Thomas828

I'm in the process of inventing an exoskeleton with jets and propellers for birds. This magnificent apparatus will enable them to take off vertically like a Harrier Jump jet fighter. They can also fly backwards and sideways.

Cicero

cyberwolf77 wrote: »

I have invented the vacuum dirtier. Turn it on and it sprays dirt all over the place.

I'm afraid it's already invented wolf..it's called a Slurry Spreader::D

Matt Holck

I invented a new social website
I know you're all posting here
but wouldn't it be better if we posted there?

Toasty113

I created the TV remote remote. You point and click then the other remote clicks and then the channel changes. Think of the possibilities!

ARSE BASTARD

Fake tan for persons of African origin.

DylanS09

Wonder why someone hasn't invented eject seats for helicopters!

PFJSplitter

The inventor was too preoccupied with "Lets count to a million" (parts one and two)...:rolleyes:

Matt Holck

I wire frame that holds sliced bread
in a box of electrical heating coils

James T Kirk

A politician that doesn't spin...

potsy86

an under water hair dryer

Green Giant

a guitar with barbed wire strings

sNarah

I'll invent the shower-dryer, it dries you up all nice and warmly after your shower, so you look all cute and fluffy when done.

PFJSplitter

A forum where people can mumble about the things they WISH they could/would do...Oh wait - has that been created already?

MoodeRator

sNarah wrote: »

I'll invent the shower-dryer, it dries you up all nice and warmly after your shower, so you look all cute and fluffy when done.

oops, sorry sNarah, but already on the market! Have used one of these and they are great!

Cicero

A cleaning solution that cleans cleaning solutions

minister poxbottle

a minister for health, bollix i'm to late :rolleyes:

TinyMontgomery

Strap-on forehead muscles

lil'bug

an M&M sorter so you can place a 1000 brown M&Ms in a brandy glass

Deki

the movable hole. handy for planting things-jumping into- falling down.
comes in assorted sizes ranging from celery seed size up to Elephant pit.
(not that I condone making elephants fall into pits- but when they're charging it's every one for their self! :eek:)

Solitaire

Elephant Pit would be great for other uses though - making jerk-off lorry and 4x4 drivers disappear would count as a service to all humanity, so this invention isn't anywhere near useless enough!

James T Kirk

The Pie-Cake-Pie: 'tis a cake - when one wants pie. And a bloody pie - when you hanker for cake! Fucker of a thing tbh...

Deki

How sad I have failed useless:o
Sol, seems to be having driving problems today

StereoLove

lipgloss that you can't see, feel, taste or smell... You put it on and it looks like you have no lipgloss on but you do... it's just invisable!

James T Kirk

Dictionaries - that have the word "dictionary" in them! Like WTF... ?

minister poxbottle

Combs for baldy bastards or a bra for jordan hang on might work,rent a tent tis a fail

komodosp

Hey the remote control remote control is a brilliant invention! You could remotely control around corners!

Breadweld - for when you've sliced bread but changed your mind about eating it... Simply spread breadweld on the slice, and weld it back to the loaf using a blow-torch!

Not my invention but I did see a thing on one of those "scam detecting" programmes, where someone got ripped off when they sent off for a "fly killer" and got in the post two small pieces of wood and instructions:
1) Place fly between pieces of wood
2) Squeeze tightly

Capt'n Midnight

those clever Japanese have a word for it chindogu









cat duster


bath suit that keeps you dry