Reading on the Bog

Aidric

I tend to go in to the jacks, do the business, wash my hands and leave. Why do some people take the paper with 'em and have a read while dropping a log? Never really got this one.

OutlawPete

It relaxes the sphincter

KevinVonSpiel

In before the plop.

Nulty

It takes time to get the mood just right for you to do the business. A book helps to take your mind off the job.

I currently have the QI book in the jacks. Sometimes I end up there longer than I need to be

Abi

In before the Flutter :pac:

The Volt

Abitar wrote: »

In before the Flutter :pac:

girls don't poo :pac:

FearDark

Toilet threads FTW!! We should have a sticky for a toilet thread in AH.

Nulty

Voltwad wrote: »

girls don't poo :pac:

They just talk....

eh, no.....better not

Abi

Voltwad wrote: »

girls don't poo :pac:

True story. We just go da bathrooms to make ourselves all pritties for boys *flutters eyelashes*

davyjose

Wait til your married with kids, OP. You'll have a fcukin PS3 and a beer fridge in there.

The Volt

Abitar wrote: »

True story. We just go da bathrooms to make ourselves all pritties for boys *flutters eyelashes*

That's all I needed to hear All us menly men can sleep soundly now. First I need a poo though.

Abi

Voltwad wrote: »

That's all I needed to hear All us menly men can sleep soundly now. First I need a poo though.

I know we kick up a fuss about the smell you guise have left in the bathroom, but the guilty little secret we have is... we like that you's have warmed up the toilet seat before we get there :pac: (for our wee wees of course!)

Jordan Berbatov

Abitar wrote: »

I know we kick up a fuss about the smell you guise have left in the bathroom, but the guilty little secret we have is... we like that you's have warmed up the toilet seat before we get there :pac: (for our wee wees of course!)

enough talk of women ****eing, it just doesnt happen

snow ghost

Many people bring their laptop nowadays, but unlike The Sun you can't wipe your hole with it, as we type some posters may be plopping away. :eek:

The_Kew_Tour

Looking at Page 3 girl just helps lad relieve himself that much quicker

Calibos

You can't fool us love. We've all seen 2girls1cup. We now know its not just wee wees you do in there and we now know why you always go in pairs too!!

SScope

Its a mere mortals Fortress of Solitude

Abi

Jordan Berbatov wrote: »

enough talk of women ****eing, it just doesnt happen

I said wee weeeeeees!

Gillington

The only time I read a book is when I'm on the bog

Finished two books in the last couple of weeks! I dont even wanna try and think how much time that is...

Luno

I go on Boards when I'm on the bog

*flushes toilet*

MickShamrock

Economical use of time. Might aswell do two things at once if the opportunity presents itself.

Sofaspud

Most of the time when I'm on the bog, I'll either bring my laptop, a guitar, or a mirror to cleverly angle against the door so I can watch TV.

I've a small toilet right beside my room, it's so handy!

snow ghost

Sofaspud wrote: »

Most of the time when I'm on the bog, I'll either bring my laptop, a guitar, or a mirror to cleverly angle against the door so I can watch TV.

I've a small toilet right beside my room, it's so handy!

A Nappy would be even handier!

WalterMitty

You dont have tvs in your jacks? I do read but after ten minutes my legs start going numb due to a trapped nerve of something that gets irritated when im sitting on the bog. Once i stayed too long and could barely get off the seat.

Latchy

I read while on the bog that piles can be attributed to spending to much time while reading on the bog .....oh

thetonynator

reading on the bog is perfectly natural, its boring just sitting there waiting for ages!!!!

Although ''ages '' could mean that i have some dietry problems . . .:D

WalterMitty

Maybe we need to keep the visual part of our brains occupied during a number two. Evolutionarily i can see the disadvantages of not using your visual cortex much while squatting on the savannah! A Lion eats ya while your dropping a chocloate log:pac: MMmm I hope my family got me a lion bar easter egg

landsleaving

I don't have time for reading on the bog.

Bran Flakes ftw.

Podge2k7

I always read when im on the bog, mainly because it gives you something to do while your waiting i suppose.

theboss80

My only problem with it is when you have found something worthwhile reading you end up staying there for ages and then your legs go numb and ya cant stand up so you're there even longer then,

we'llallhavetea_old

constipated people read on the bog. if its not ready to come out, wait awhile ffs. sitting in there with your cheeks spread, praying for gravity to drag it out is ridiculous.
:mad: <-constipated face

OutlawPete

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

constipated people read on the bog.

Nope, not true :mad:

It's just that men can multi-task and why sit there for five minutes reading the back of a shampoo bottle when you could be taking in the football scores or checking which horses be running later that day?

Wimminz .. :rolleyes:

we'llallhavetea_old

OutlawPete wrote: »

Nope, not true :mad:

It's just that men can multi-task and why sit there for five minutes reading the back of a shampoo bottle when you could be taking in the football scores or checking which horses be running later that day?

Wimminz .. :rolleyes:

why does it take five minutes? this is what i can't understand. in and out for me. done.

Overheal

Thats why I have a laptop.

Abi

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

constipated people read on the bog. if its not ready to come out, wait awhile ffs. sitting in there with your cheeks spread, praying for gravity to drag it out is ridiculous.
:mad: <-constipated face

I have to admit, when I copped you'd just posted in here... I was afraid to click

OutlawPete

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

in and out for me. done.

I thought we were talking about .. wait, what?

we'llallhavetea_old

Abitar wrote: »

I have to admit, when I copped you'd just posted in here... I was afraid to click

mwah! i like this newly acquired power FEAR.

gnite all x

Abi

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

mwah! i like this newly acquired power FEAR.

gnite all x

If there was ever a boardsie you had to meet in person, this is her. I'm picking up a Carrie Bradshaw with an inner city Dub accent :pac:



Go forth and dream naughty things

OutlawPete

Abitar wrote: »

If there was ever a boardsie you had to meet in person, this is her. I'm picking up a Carrie Bradshaw with an inner city Dub accent :pac:



Go forth and dream naughty things

I'm off to bed too, to dream of the night you and Tea meet ..

Abi

I can see why... good night now

minidazzler

I bring my iTouch, generally will read something, sometimes boards, sometimes some other stuff just to pass the time TBH.

Xluna

Aidric wrote: »

I tend to go in to the jacks, do the business, wash my hands and leave. Why do some people take the paper with 'em and have a read while dropping a log? Never really got this one.

Because they're beating the bollocks off themselves while looking at page three.:D

OutlawPete

Xluna wrote: »

Because they're beating the bollocks off themselves while looking at page three.:D

Sssshhhhhh!! :mad:

Grassed us all up now and me after convincing the wimminz we were just looking at the horse racing and sports sections

Mint Sauce

the latest edition of Q or 442, the suppliment from the newspaper, or just a quick game on my mobile

have won more races there, less distractions

Forest Master

KevinVonSpiel wrote: »

In before the plop.

I bet you expected lots of "thanks" for that witty reply, didn't you? You fail!

cafecolour

My flat just generally has a crossword in there that everyone just contributes to while they're in there.

Gummy Panda

In America, people are probably using their iPads on the toilet now.

df1985

how long do people be spending on the toilet?? it wouldnt be worth my while tbh. when i need to go, it doesnt hang around. im in and out in a few minutes. never got the whole bringing stuff to the jacks for a read.

Mint Sauce

df1985 wrote: »

how long do people be spending on the toilet?? it wouldnt be worth my while tbh. when i need to go, it doesnt hang around. im in and out in a few minutes. never got the whole bringing stuff to the jacks for a read.

i have a stack of magazines there, i bring one in, and leave it there for next time

jprender

I tend to bring a snack in with me.

Some nice cheese and crackers. Maybe a little bit of pate.

orourkeda

I like to bring in the sunday independent. I can then wipe my buttocks with it after dropping a watery guinness scutter after the Saturday Pints.

I used to cut out the Brendan O'Connor column on the front page though. Imagine letting that touch your rump.