What a Prick!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/north_east/8570398.stm

A man who assaulted a female police officer with his penis has been fined. Marium Varinauskas, 28, tried to strike the officer on the head with his penis when she was called out to his flat, but she got out of the way.

What a prick... :pac:

when she was called out to his flat,

lol

epgc3fyqirnbsx

Must have a fair weapon on him

Stark

*envious*. It must be massive if it's usable as an assault weapon.

TheInquisitor

What a legend more like!

OutlawPete

Good job he was wearing a helmet.

MrStuffins

<insert witty response>

SadieSue

Yeah right she probably smelt it before she saw it. That's why she got out of the way.

Micky Dolenz

That will never stand up in court.

fontanalis

I gope she didn't get the sack!

Bonito

The police officer came to the rescue of the Gf but wasn't willing to take one for the team.

Darksaga87

"Its so big i could beat you round the head with it!"

"yeah right!"

*SLAP!!!"

MagicMarker

From now on she'll know to wear a helmut as protection.

orourkeda

He must have some pecker on him.

Big nudger swinging out of him

ronaneire

Sure it wasn't a truncheon he tried to hit her with.

Stinicker

There's something fishy about this one

View Profile

She must have tossed him into the cell after that.

Micky Dolenz

The man in question was the first to admit he cocked up.

PeterIanStaker

I suppose he thought he was a hard man. . .

spider guardian

up she flew and the cock flattened her :pac:

NothingMan

Damn, all the good puns are taken, but i'd like some thanks anyway!

Darksaga87

NothingMan wrote: »

Damn, all the good puns are taken, but i'd like some thanks anyway!

Thats what she said, but she got a micky in the face.... your welcome.

Sir Gallagher

£600 fine!! Looks like it wasn't just the police officer who was shafted! Wahey!!!!!

Fear Uladh

She will get some Stick for that.

Sir Gallagher

Looks like the man in question is no longer a fine upstanding member of society.

rednik

As punishment he should be made stand in the next general erection.

OutlawPete

Sir Gallagher wrote: »

Looks like the man in question is no longer a fine upstanding member of society.

Thanking for the best edit I've ever seen.

"No wait, I can better it.." :pac:

For a change it wasn't a pole with a pole looking for a hole!

Sir Gallagher

OutlawPete wrote: »

Thanking for the best edit I've ever seen.

"No wait, I can better it.." :pac:

Hehe

Demonique

Talk about helicoptering...

landsleaving

What was she doing with her head at waist level?

OutlawPete

landsleaving wrote: »

What was she doing with her head at waist level?

What was he doing with his cock at head level?

"Look, my helmet's bigger than yours.."

/milking this gag

thecornflake

OutlawPete wrote: »

What was he doing with his cock at head level?

must have been a real dickhead

Son Of A Vidic

Assault with a 'deadly' weapon surely.

ScumLord

I wonder how he set that up, was it like the Fr Ted episode when he kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse? And he only got caught when the 10 x 10m print showed up.

bonerm

MrStuffins wrote: »

<insert witty response>

with plenty of lubriant

Sofaspud

He got away with a £600 fine?

That policewoman seriously got shafted . . .

bazmaiden

I bet she saw it cuming

cleremy jarkson

MrStuffins wrote: »

<insert witty response>

This type of response is very unoriginal.

cashback

"but she got out of the way."

Love this line, as though she only narrowly dodged a serious penis-related injury.

Snas

This guy is a threat to pube-lic safety!

Pacing Mule

A man who assaulted a female police officer with his penis has been fined.

Marium Varinauskas, 28, tried to strike the officer on the head with his penis when she was called out to his flat, but she got out of the way. Lithuanian Varinauskas admitted a charge of assault at Aberdeen Sheriff Court and was fined £600. The court heard he had been drinking heavily and could not remember committing the offence at his home in Aberdeen. Police were called to his home by his girlfriend, who had complained about him being drunk last November. They arrived to find the self-employed engineer sitting on the sofa wearing a pair of underpants.

Fiscal depute Elaine Lynch said: "The accused got to his feet and was standing over the police officer exposing his penis and thrusting it in her face, forcing her to take evasive action to avoid getting struck." Defence solicitor John Hardie said: "He was sitting on the couch drunk with his pants on. "He can't remember anything but accepts that if that's what the police say then that's what happened. "He has never been so drunk before that day and accepts he has to take full responsibility. He apologises profusely and is extremely embarrassed." His not guilty plea to committing a breach of the peace by uttering offensive and sexual remarks was accepted by the Crown. Sheriff Annella Cowan was told that the Lithuanian had now quit binge drinking because of the incident.

Source BBC Scotland

I have to say I find it quite funny but that's my childish sense of humour.

OutlawPete

Sloppy seconds on this story I'm afraid

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055856524

Pacing Mule

OutlawPete wrote: »

Sloppy seconds on this story I'm afraid

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055856524

Ah W**K

Sorry Mods !

Bonito

IBTL

http://images.starcraftmazter.net/4chan/for_forums/this_thread_again.jpg

WIZE

Dyr

Pageant Messiah wrote: »

Fiscal depute Elaine Lynch said: "The accused got to his feet and was standing over the police officer exposing his penis and thrusting it in her face, forcing her to take evasive action to avoid getting struck."

Does that mean that she's a mickey dodger?