How many kids question?

Quality

So just looking for views on the whole how many kids.

I have 3 at the moment, I am 30 and not sure whether I should be finished or not, I wouldnt want to leave a big gap for my last child so decisions will need to be made in the not so distant future.

So how did the rest of you decide on how many kids you wanted.

Did you plan on having a certain no?

Did this change due to circumstances? Ie money, tiredness,age, infertitlity, stress, unplanned pregnancy, etc, etc.

I just love when my kids are babies.. Will this longing ever go away?

stovelid

Had planned to have just two. Second now on the way and that will be that.

Have to say I agree with the baby thing. I'd love to keep him at this age (19 months) for a few more years....

Aibreann

I am 30 and I know for sure that in the future I want only one. But most of my friends have 2 and they have stopped. Takes time and patience and lot of work and of course big responsibility when you have them.

My aunt and uncles have 5 and they are around 37..not bad at all, they are a big happy family.

pickarooney

Have two, doubt we could handle any more.

Ludo

Wanted one...a "higher power" decided to give us twins...won't be risking that again so we are done and dusted.

January

Have always wanted two, have one, next one due in three weeks. So finished then!

run_Forrest_run

Ludo wrote: »

Wanted one...a "higher power" decided to give us twins...won't be risking that again so we are done and dusted.

ah Ludo, never say never, sure go out for a nice meal, some vino and see what happens

run_Forrest_run

have two (one girl, one boy) and I'm happy out but Mrs Forrest has mentioned #3:eek: I must tell the postman to watch out.

Quality

adrieanne__x wrote: »

Have always wanted two, have one, next one due in three weeks. So finished then!

Congrats Mrs, Didnt know you were due again... No messing with you!!

Quality

What are your reasons for not wanting more...

Or is it just a set number in your head?:)

January

Quality wrote: »

What are your reasons for not wanting more...

Or is it just a set number in your head?:)

Just a number in my head! Always just wanted two... don't think I could handle more than that!

Ludo

Quality wrote: »

What are your reasons for not wanting more...

Or is it just a set number in your head?:)

To protect my sanity. It is barely hanging in there with 2...3 would tip me over the edge I fear.

run_Forrest_run

Quality wrote: »

What are your reasons for not wanting more...

Or is it just a set number in your head?:)

2 reasons:

1. Illness (our two were ill a lot in the early stages, both in hospital on numerous occasions between the ages of 6 weeks and 20 weeks old). It takes it out of you let me tell ya, especially when we don't have any help from family etc...they live in a different county.

2. Cost...the pricks I work for (wife works for the same pricks) cut our salaries..funny though, childcare costs weren't cut!! Between childcare costs and medical bills I don't think I can go for #3.

gent9662

Have two, girl and boy, wife wants another but I don't. Two is plenty

dlambirl

I was an old child for 8 years and then my sister came along....... I always wanted a big family myself and all the kids not to far apart...

Hoping to have 4/5 please god.

diamondgirl

i have 2 girls, a big age gap in between. it wasnt planed to be that big, but just happened that way.
I suppose its up to each persons family circumstances as to how many they have.
I personally, dont want anymore, i have one girl in secondary school & the other in primary, so its expensive for books, clothing, phone credit, cinema trips, ipods, cds, the list goes on. lol the joys of having a teenager.

run_Forrest_run

diamondgirl wrote: »

its expensive for books, clothing, phone credit, cinema trips, ipods, cds, the list goes on. lol the joys of having a teenager.

yikes, don't freak me out, my 4 year old girl is like a teenager already..based on what she's coming out with at the age of 4 I dread to think of what she'll be like as a teenager.

Nevyn

I've 2, one of each and at with them turning 12 and 10 this year I don't ever want to go back to the nappy stages.

lolly22

I have one, before her i wouldnt have minded not having kid's, it was never a must for me personally, being a mum now, well I love it (most of the time;))!

She's two now, I dont miss her being a baby baby much cause im loving watching the changes in her growing up, so it doesnt make me want more.

Would i want more? Right now id say no (she's everything to me, but she's also enough!!), who know's in the very distant future that could change...

Moonbeam

I think 4 is a nice number:) saying that I only have 1 so no idea what it is like to manage 4 kids!
I think afford ability has to come in as a deciding factor and also manageability:)

cbyrd

I have 2 girls they're 7 and 11(next month) and ben arrived 3 weeks ago .. none of my children were planned and i was done after 2... yeah right!! i have big problems with contraception as in i can't do the hormones so my family is a result of condon failure!!!:eek: hahaha:D so i'm not ruling out a fourth baby unless i can talk the other half into the snip.. i wouldn't mind though it's easier with the girls being older and having that gap... they're a great help. although we did have to sell our house so we could afford for me not to be working but it's worked out to be the best thing ever, it's so much less stress and i get to watch daytime tv!!!!!:D:D:D i said i was never having another baby.. never say never...

Ickle Magoo

I was told by the doc's not to have any more kids so we have the two 15 months apart - tbh, I wouldn't want any more - I really didn't enjoy the baby stage and like motherhood much more now they can converse and sleep through the night!

Redpunto

I have one of each at 9 and 4 and we're thinkin of having 1 more and then be done:D

CathyMoran

I know that I am being very nieve as our son has not been born yet but I would love another 2 babies. Maybe ask me again after he is born. Am almost 36 though so time is against me and I have been very sick for this pregnancy but I adore our baby and his dad.

littlebug

We stopped at 2. There were different reasons for stopping at that. Age was one thing (35 when the second one was born) but that alone wouldn't have been the deciding factor.
Finances were important. I didn't work for a year after the second one was born and we pretty much reached crisis point at that... I need to be working part time for us to keep afloat as things are and another baby would really test us,
I was also "blessed" :rolleyes: with the worst sleepers in the world and I actually think I might die if I had to go through all that again.
As well as being a bad sleeper my first child pretty much screamed non stop through her first year and a half (day and night) ....and really I would die if I had to go through all that again. Seriously... my hair turned grey in that time:eek:. I took the risk with the second one but though he was a bad sleeper he wasn't a screamer.
#1 was premature and #2 was a rapid birth... with risks getting higher as I aged.... they were extra things to be concerned about (ie even more premature and rapid birth!)

I also love the ages they are now... seeing them learn and develop and play together and having proper conversations. I love that we can leave them with a babysitter and not have to wait til they go to sleep and not worry about them waking up and screaming the house down . I love that I get to sleep. I like that at 40 I get to have hobbies again Ya we're done!

smelltheglove

:DGood question. I have 2 girls. First was a surprise from a previous, met my husband when she was 1, she's 7 now, second is 3. We always said we'd have more, 2 of each if possible but not sure now, :osays a lot about our second doesnt it. Really though my kids re quite well behaved, well the first is an angel the second a bit wild but both were extremely tiring at baby age, walking by 9 months and climbing wherever they could just so as to jump.

Right now I am focussing on my career, trying to build a good name for myself in the business so onbviously any consideration has been put aside for the forseeable future and any future kids will have to be planned well in advance if we decide on it seen as I take bookings for a year in advance if not sometimes more, I wouldnt fancy doing my job heavily pregnant.

I think for us though we have time to decide still, I'm 29 and he's 26, I started young so theres a few years left in me yet but my hatred of mornings really doesnt help matters and he's not much better than me either, we're kind of enjoying where we're at now.

deisemum

I've got 2 boys and do not want anymore children. My younger lad is 12 and as I'm 45 I'd be devastated if I were to end up pregnant at this stage. I didn't have a fixed number in mind, just thought I'd try for one and see how it goes. I also knew I didn't want more than 3. I also hated being pregnant as I was so sick for so long.

Being the eldest of 9 I'm so against big families in fact I resent it mainly because I know of so many who are the eldest or second eldest in their large families and the one thing we all agreed on is that we felt we didn't have a childhood. We were left doing so much looking after our younger siblings, in effect partially rearing them as our mothers were too knackered and busy with the younger ones. My mother had a baby per year so she was either pregnant or just getting over a pregnancy so had that to contend with and then trying to manage a family.

Also being the eldest I regularly got the blame whenever my younger siblings misbehaved and the usual "why weren't you watching them".

Vel

I have one 11 month old and another on the way and that will be that. The main reasons would be finances and space in our house (scope for a large extension but can't afford that for a long time)

But another major factor for me is that I absolutely HATE being pregnant and really couldn't put myself through it again after this. The only reason I did it again was that I don't want my son to be an only child

CeNedra

I have two. 2.5 years and almost 1. The last year has been nuts and it is only going to get busier as I'm back to work next week. I won't be going again unless a serious accident occurs and thankfully the other half feels the same. I haven't had a full night sleep in a year, am tired, last night particularly bad. But I have to tell you, my two are the best and I couldn't be happier with what I have been blessed with. I have to go back to work for 6 months or so, but I may be finishing up and focusing on the important job at hand after that. Aren't we all so lucky to have what we have guys!!

embee

I have one girl, she will be 4 in two weeks.

I always thought, before I had kids, that I wanted 4 kids. On reflection though, I think one more would be enough for me. I don't want Rhi to be an only child and that's the reason I'd like another child, but after number 2, whenever he or she may come along, I would imagine that'll be me done. I wouldn't be bothered if I ended up with 2 girls... I know some women would like one of each but I wouldn't feel the need to "go again" for a boy if I had another girl. Everyone is different though... I know that since I was a wee girl myself I always imagined myself as being a Mammy to a girl, but not to a boy... tis strange!

Wee girls are great anyways, as are wee boys, but I can't imagine myself with a son at all!!

run_Forrest_run

CeNedra wrote: »

Aren't we all so lucky to have what we have guys!!

so true.

Dades

Have one. Second due in April.

I'm done so the missis has been told she needs to come up with a large lump sum before even mentioning number three. I'm almost hoping she doesn't win the lottery. :pac:

Sleepy

I've a 17 month old girl of my own and I'm step-dad to her half brother who's 4. As the O/H says, "the kitchen's closed". We just couldn't handle any more at this stage and finances would be a worry too.

I'd only ever pictured myself as a father to a little girl but never fancied having an only child so happy enough as we are. Have thought about the snip a lot recently but the reversal rates don't seem great should we ever change our minds / unforseeable circumstances etc. Seems too permanent...

bazwaldo

Before having a family I thought 3 or 4 was a good number.

Once we started we just went with the flow. Now number 5 is due tomorrow. Never say never, but we are probably done after that. Theres not a spare minute as it is so its going to be mental here for a few months.

ebmma

Well, when I was a kid I wanted 4 kids (two of each). I'm an only child and hated it, I really think it's easier with more than one.
Then I realised that I do not really want kids in general, I just want them with my OH

Have no. 1 on the way and (unless I absolutely hate the experience) I'd like no. 2 to come shortly after.
Then we'll just have to wait and see. If I end up getting a good job then I'll want a big-ish gap, if not - then it'll just depend on when we want another one. I can't imagine liking baby stage, I mostly want grown up kids

My husband is from a family of 7 and all of his siblings are great to be around. I know nothing is guaranteed, but it'll be nice to give my kids some extra relatives. Being from such a small family myself and not on a speaking terms with my parents I pretty much don't have 'my side' of the extended family (my in-laws are lovely though). And it was pretty lonely growing up.

We don't have much money or a house (our boy is a 'recession baby', no point spending another couple of years without a job just to start a family when a good one shows up) but we are resigned to the fact that even when finances are better they won't be great, so no point putting our lives on hold. Kids will just have to share

I'm (thankfully) dealing with the pregnancy really well, so hopefully I'll keep being lucky!:D

gerrycollins

my wife was effectively an only child (14 years between her and her next sibling), we had a honeymoon baby, didnt even discuss kids except that we wanted 3/4

so no 1 comes along and within months of the birth she was talking about no 2 as they would be close together and the other two (possible) another few years apart but that they would be close enough.

however after a very long wait(2 years in total) no 2 arrived and no sooner was he home than no 3 was in the oven.

so now they are all close but no 4 is still on the cards however it can wait 3/4 years. locals make jokes about me sleeping in the shed etc its all good fun and would not give up what Ive gone through in the last 4 years for gold. if we had the time and the money we would have many many more but the oh body wont take it anymore than the purse strings.

itz me

have one she's 6, plans to have 1 more but just not yet...maybe its a big gap but we are really enjoying our 6yr old now

foxy06

I have 3 boys 8, 5 and 3 months and would love another one or maybe two (boy or girl) Always wanted a big family:D