Cant stay motivated.

bellz_x

It seems that no matter what I do, I can never stay motivated.
My intentions are always great and I have everything planned for a few days in advance, food, exercise, food diary. But then it all kinda goes out the window after a few days.

I NEED to lose 70lbs to be at a healthy weight. That sounds so ridiclously huge when i say it but its a reality.

It will probably take me a very long time to do it but I need to.

I just dont know how to stay motivated. I read the topics on here which are great and I love reading them to give me that "I can do it" feeling and to be honest, that feeling sticks with me for around 3 - 4 days then I fall.

I have a takeaway or I snack on bad food, I lose my willpower. I let me cravings take over and I go off track, then I always think "Well, thats that week spoiled".

I really need someone to push me but I need that someone to be me.

I've no idea why I cant do it. I feel like a failure when I dont do it.

I will be 21 in May. I wanted to lose a bit before May, just enough to feel comfortable around my family and friends at my party.

What can I do? - Im a student and Im constantly surrounded by bad food.

It's sickening.

Dolbert

I know how difficult and insurmountable it can seem to lose a large amount of weight. I would say to break everything down into mini-goals and go from there. For example, my next mini goal is too get into the 10 stones, one after that a size 12 etc.

Another thing to remember is that, even when you have lost half of what you need to lose, you will have made huge improvements on your appearance and health. I still have 25 or so pounds to go, but I am getting so many compliments almost daily which is a fantastic boost

Would you consider joining a slimming group such as weight watchers? I personally find low-carb best for me but I know many have had success through the mutual support of ww. The weekly weigh ins might keep you on track, something to consider?

bellz_x

Yeah, It does seem so hard and when I think about it i freak out a little.
I do have a diary which I made myself, It has small goals like, Drink 2 ltrs of water everyday for one week. Do at least 30 mins exercise 3 - 4 times per week.
That kinda stuff but for the last 2 weeks i havent met those goals!
I cant even do small ones like that.

I was in weight watchers before and I lost around 1.5 stone.. But I stopped going as my weight stopped dropping and didnt drop for about a month.
As ya can imagine, that was a huge blow to my confidence and i thought it wasnt working so I stopped.

But in saying that, my boyfriend lost 3 stone through WW. He didnt go to meetings, he just took advice from his mam.

So I cant understand what is wrong with me.

It's upsetting because I feel like I'm failing and people have said to me, "Oh, i thought you were in WW?".. I just want the air to disolve me!

Congrats to you tho, you're doing so well! That must be an amazing feeling!

How do you keep motivated?

Dolbert

Thanks! I do feel great now, I'm even experimenting with clothes a lot more! My asthma's practically gone too, and my bad ankle never gives me grief anymore

I think the hardest stage of weight loss is the start, as it can take a while to see results... I lost almost 2.5 stone before anyone noticed! Now it has become a way of life, and my friends and colleagues are very encouraging which helps! Once you start to see results that is motivation in itself.

They say it takes 21 days to form a habit, so how about you set yourself a three week plan and try your best to stick to it? After that, you'll probably have lost your taste for junk and find yourself wanting healthier choices more.

How about starting a log in the food diary section? I've found mine a massive help and there are lots of people giving great advice and encouragement. Best of luck and I promise it gets easier

bellz_x

Yeh maybe I will. That sounds good!
Thank you so much!!

And that is amazing. I suffer with my joints aswell, maybe cos Im so overweight!

Your so lucky to have lost and your doing so well!

I agree, id love to be trying out new clothes, all the stuff i wanna wear that i cant cos it doesnt fit!

I might try that log in the Diary section, altho Im not on the computer that much! i could try it tho??

Great advice, thank you so much!!

Ciaran500

bellz_x wrote: »

I might try that log in the Diary section, altho Im not on the computer that much! i could try it tho??

You only need to get on every few days. Take down what you eat in your diary then post it up there when you can and people will post advice and encouragement.

Most importantly don't give up, its going to be a slow battle with some weeks with no loss. Just keep at it and you will get your goals.

The Davestator

Dont give up OP - As a personal trainer I'd give you the following advice;

Write down everything you eat AS you eat it - Spark People is a good site. By writing down stuff as you eat it, you are less likely to eat it in the end!

Dont start a mad strict diet on a given day - as others have said, make small changes over a couple of weeks.

Give youself a cheat meal / cheat day so you can have a bit of a blow out. This might sound counter productive, but it actually does motivate you to get 'back on the wagon' (dont overdo it)

Exercise - its essential. Walk every second day hail rain or shine.

Good luck

ya-what-now?

Hi OP, look you've done the hardest part - deciding yourself that you want to make a change. Believe me, I've been where you are. For my 21st birthday I wore a size 22 dress and weighed just under 18stone. Now it's two years later - I am not yet at my goal of 10stone but I'm just over 12stone and am a dress size 10/12.

Everyone here offers great advice and motivation. Once you decide yourself that you ARE going to lose weight nobody will be able to change your mind. I definitely agree with the davestator: tracking what you eat will make a real difference. Before I lost weight, I didn't necessarily think that I ate a HUGE amount more than anyone else, but it was what I ate and how I ate. I'd say I kept Centra in business with the amount of chicken fillet rolls I got through in college - then convenience dinners with very few fresh vegtables. With tracking what I eat I've become just so much more conscious of everything I put into my mouth - it stops me just eating something because it's there!

Also, you have to treat yourself. We all have a life to live - there are going to be meals out, birthdays, drinks to be had. But it's managing how to be able to have nights out/holidays without falling into old habits.

You've done weight watchers before so you probably have a lot of knowledge about healthy eating, so now it's just a matter of deciding now is the time to lose it, and start making little changes. You can and will lose weight!!

Best of luck!

bellz_x

Wow, guys. Thank you so much for this support! Its unbelievable. To be honest, I wasnt expecting any more replies after Dolores. So thank you!!

I think you're right tho, tracking is excellent but Im so lazy! How do I just make myself do it? - I always stop after a few days, or I forget a few days and I have forgotten what I've eaten. Maybe a pocketsize one that i can carry around?? Would that make much of a difference??

ya-what-now? wrote: »

Hi OP, look you've done the hardest part - deciding yourself that you want to make a change. Believe me, I've been where you are. For my 21st birthday I wore a size 22 dress and weighed just under 18stone. Now it's two years later - I am not yet at my goal of 10stone but I'm just over 12stone and am a dress size 10/12.

I am amazed at that. Did you lose your weight on weight watchers??
That is honestly inspirational! - If you can do it, Im sure I can too!
You lost so much over the past 2 years, that is amazing! You must be so happy. Did you do much exercise??

Ciaran - Thank you for the support. I think I will try get on as much as possible to update my diary once I've started it.

The davestator - Thank you! Advice like that is not often given
I havent got much willpower! That's what i really lack

But I dont feel I have enough to look forward to.. altho my 21st is a huge deal, i still feel I can just be as I am. I dunno tho :(

But thank you all so so much!!
You've made me feel so much better about myself

I had a good day today, nice breakfast and lunch.. then an okay-ish dinner! I had a glass of vodka, just one tho, with some 7up free.
Anyone know the points for one small glass of vodka??



Em x

ya-what-now?

Yeah I lost the weight with weight watchers. I've found it's working great for me to be honest. I need the motivation of the weekly weigh-in and have a great leader, and get great tips from people in the class.

I've changed my eating habits big time - cook an awful lot more, but really enjoy it. I also joined a gym at the same time as I started WW, and on average go 3/4 times a week. Without doubt this has made me feel tons healthier and fitter and has definitely sped up my weight loss!

One measure of vodka is 1.5pts, and your 7Up free is, well, FREE!

Micamaca

Firstly, well done for trying so hard to lose weight. As others say, the first step is the hardest, in admitting you want to change something. The next steps are hard too, but you are on your journey to better health. That's the main thing.

I just wanted to say, if diets don't work for you, that's okay. They don't work for a lot of people because they are usually very restrictive and create cravings and so on. People end up having a couple of bad days off the diet and then the guilt swoops in and you feel lousy. Don't. It's not you, it's the whole diet system.

If you want to change how you feel and weigh, then it will take time. It's not rocket science (luckily enough)... reduce the amount of energy you are taking in and increase the energy you are spending. As some wise person said, it takes a some time to put on the weight...accept it will take some time to take it back off and don't try to do it too fast. It is much healthier and will stay off for good if you do it slowly and gently. Try reading books about the benefits of healthy eating... walnuts are full of things that counteract breast cancer for example. Who knew!

Make small changes to your diet to try to bring in healthier and tastier foods to replace the less healthy ones. For example, switch from butter to a healthier low-fat spread...(just an example). When I say diet, I mean what you eat normally every day...which is the real meaning of the word diet. You will be surprised at yourself...once you start eating better and doing that bit of walking everyday, your body will start to crave healthier foods. I crave cheese and onion crisps a lot! But sometimes it's because I haven't eaten a proper meal, so I make a cheese and onion sandwich in the grill with some paprika sprinkled over...and the craving is gone. It tastes much better too and has more nutrition.

Other times hunger is down to being dehydrated. So keep drinking the water. Three meals a day works for some people, other people need to eat six small meals. Find what works for you. What works for a thousand other people might not suit you. That's perfectly normal - you're an individual.

Keep encouraging yourself, set small goals as another poster said and try not to be unkind to yourself and think you're you are doing badly. We all have bad days. Pick yourself up the next day and start again. As Scarlett O'Hara said in Gone with the Wind, "Tomorrow is another day, fresh, with no mistakes in it"

I've gone on a bit long now, so will just finish with the very best of luck and bon courage as the frogs say... you can do it.

m

fatmammycat

Micamaca wrote: »

Make small changes to your diet to try to bring in healthier and tastier foods to replace the less healthy ones. For example, switch from butter to a healthier low-fat spread...(just an example).
m

Funnily enough butter is FAR better for you than low-fat spreads. But I pretty much agree with everything else you said, small managable changes are more doable and sustainable.
OP good luck, you can do it!

Micamaca

fatmammycat wrote: »

Funnily enough butter is FAR better for you than low-fat spreads. But I pretty much agree with everything else you said, small managable changes are more doable and sustainable.
OP good luck, you can do it!

Do you know, I knew as I was typing that someone would come back about the low-fat spreads comment!
I don't know if butter is healthier...I would have to take your word for it...probably less additives in and it etc. But it's ruddy hard to spread! Tends to rip everything to shreds. It was just an example, albeit a bad one.

But glad you agree with most of it. And OP, you most certainly can and will do it. Keep saying that to yourself every day and it will help you succeed.

all_smilz

bellz_x wrote: »

Wow, guys. Thank you so much for this support! Its unbelievable. To be honest, I wasnt expecting any more replies after Dolores. So thank you!!

I think you're right tho, tracking is excellent but Im so lazy! How do I just make myself do it? - I always stop after a few days, or I forget a few days and I have forgotten what I've eaten. Maybe a pocketsize one that i can carry around?? Would that make much of a difference??

Hey!
I have been in your exact funk the last few months gaining weight and punishing myself and then gorging on junk because i just felt like i had failed.... its utterly frustrating and depressing.... i have a wardrobe of clothes that dont fit! I joined weightwatchers today.... i have not lost weight in the last week or so of exercising and mentally being nicer to me- ok- i have still had some chocolate but HEY! i did go to the gym, i drank more water, i cut down on sugar in my tea and I made a lot of my own dinners.... i can find it hard to track my weight and diet- why not use the calendar or organisation function on your mobile phone? or a small notebook in your wallet/handbag.... i also used to set up motivational messages for myself on my phone and post weight losses on facebook so all my friends could egg me on.... Its the little things- just maybe try to focus on the right things you are doing, its not easy! i wish you luck-
*toddles off to start ww food diary on boards!*

littlefriend

Hey there,
when I started ww I figured out the points values of about 5-10 breakfasts, 10 or so lunches and 10 or so dinners. I also made out a list of low point snacks. Then I ate mainly what was on those lists for maybe 6 weeks or so [well during the week anyway]. At the time I was on 20 points so most breakfasts were about 4 points, lunches 6 points, dinners 8, snacks 2.

It saved me having to think about things too much and getting caught out not knowing how much I ate etc. It really, really worked and I found it particularly good Monday to Friday when I had not got much spare time.

You just need to get organised. Once you do that the first few weeks will be grand. After that you will start to feel your clothes looser etc and you will be motivated to continue. You can be fat at your 21st and feel crap or you could have lost the guts of half of what you need to, feel amazing with everybody talking about how fabulous you look. Not much of a choice there really!

I'm sure your boyfriend would be more than happy to help you. It really isn't that hard.

The Davestator

Op - ask for an iphone for your 21st (but you want it now!)and you can track all your food on the 'spark people app' (which is free)

Youve got lots of good advice here, but its hard to motivate someone until they really want to do something.

You want to lose weight for your 21st but its so far away that you tell yourself that a bad meal now wont make any difference - it will

Picture yourself in a LBD at your 21st, looking great, everyone telling you how amazing you look and a line of lads waiting to kiss ya! (i want an invite):D

bellz_x

Hey, I haven't been on for a few days, was the boyfriend's birthday so i spoiled him. I now have some free time to relax as he's gone off to america.

Ive read through all those messages again and I feel so good about this.

Im very pleased to announce that I have lost 5lbs!

Im so happy with myself!

I'm going to London on tuesday for my friends 21st so I'm sure there will be some snacking and a few drinks involved but Im gonna do my best to make the better choices.

As we'll be in London there'll be alot of walking involved so Im sure that will count for some of the walking I'll be missing. Then as soon as I get back, it'll be back to normal.

I was thinking, when I get back I might start a diary on here, I'll see how much time I have though because I will be back at college, but Im very lucky in the sense that my college is right beside a tesco so I can buy food in advance for the week for lunches and stuff. Thankfully!

Also, with knowing that vodka and Diet 7up is only 1.5 points, I can happily have a glass or two knowing I wont go over my points. Im going to save up a few if I can so I can have a nice piece of birthday cake! hehehe!

The Davestator - You're invited! hehe!


The 21st seems to be coming up quicker and quicker though so now I have to concentrate on a dress. Would it be a good motivator if I bought a dress?? Maybe that was a size or so smaller than I am? Or might that be a waste of money?


Thanks again guys, Im so happy I have all of this support. I cant believe it!!


Em

One last thing: Why does everyone call me OP?

Dolbert

OP = Original Poster

Fantastic result with the 5lb! Personally, I would hold off buying a dress just yet, as you don't know exactly how much your body's going to change! I would say have it picked out, maybe online, and have it as an incentive to buy it a dress size or so smaller closer to the time Best of luck!

bellz_x

Ooohh I get ya!

Yeh, I think your right. I havent seen anything I like just yet though.

Gonna have a browse around.

Well im back from london and I've lost another 1lb! I cant believe it.

Saying that though, I only ate when I needed to and I had about 6 alcoholic drinks the whole time I was there.. and also did alot of walking. Ever realise how many STEPS there are in london?

Im pretty pleased though Today, I took some photo's of myself to see how much my body changes over the next while. Here's hoping its good!

Shinners13

Hi Bellz!!
Just want to say that you are doing great and you should definitely continue now and you will really be surprised at how much different you will be by May!!!
There will definitely be a long line of lads for a kiss!!
And everyone will be commenting on how good you look just wait and see!!
You are really doing well now so keep it up!! xxxx

poconnor16

OP - if you have a day where you go off track and go to town on a packet of Hob Nobs, dont let it get you down. We ALL do it from time to time, we're human. The trick is, to tell yourself - ok, thats enough. Tomorrow I am back on track. And I will also go for a walk to make up for it.
Try and find a type of exercise you are interested in. Being part of the group will motivate you. It also means you are not sitting around at home watching TV, picking at food etc. If you are not sporty, take up a hobby. Remember, a person is not defined by their looks - focus on other talents too.
5lbs is loads - well done!! Try to keep posting here, I find boards.ie keeps me very motivated.

Let us know how you are doing, good luck!;)

bellz_x

Thank you! Yeh, I find I'm coming on all the time, see what other people are saying, just little things really really help! Im aiming for another 1lb by friday, so with any luck!

Fingers crossed.

Well I love music but Im a terrible dancer so i was thinking of taking up aerobics or aqua aerobics. See how that does me. Im gonna try a few things. I can get a membership at my gym for a good price because Im a student. So that's great! I might do it!

I'm only getting back on track now with money and stuff since xmas, holidays and birthdays! So i might invest in a membership! Hehe

I'll keep posting though, and guys, seriously, thank you so so much for all the messages of support. Knowing that I can come on here and nobody will judge me, nobody will tell me I'm not doing it right or I'm not good enough is amazing. So thank you.


Em x

Magenta

Hello OP
The hardest thing about losing weight is getting yourself into the routine of it.
Exercise doesn't have to be boring. I personally cannot go on a treadmill at all, I'd fall asleep. I put my iPod on and dance instead. You don't feel the half hour going then and you're a right sweaty betty afterwards!
Also remember how good it feels to lose weight and remember that feeling every time you want a Mars Bar or a bag of crisps. Then when you lose more weight you will be even happier because you know it is from saying "no" to yourself.
Hope that helps

sarah_de_sousa

i dont know if anyone else has suggested any of the following so if the have i appologise

1) put a picture of you when you were at a healthy weight on your fridge and cuboards (if you have always been large try a picture of a healthy weighted celebrity that you admire)

2) get your friends to write one thing the like about you write each one down and when you have those low days read them over to yourself.

3) put positive goals and comments on post-its and stick them around your mirror.

4) take one day at a time and if you have the odd slip up dont give up completely stick at it the next day

5) set small goals like by mid march i want to have dropped 5lb for example rather than i need to loose 70lb now as it is just too large a goal that you wont achieve it as your mind percieves it as unattainable

hope that helps in some way