If YOU ran the country...

Duggy747

How would you sort our problems?

Me? I'd rule this country with an iron fist and turn our prisons into those like the Turkish counterparts, that'll keep ya on the straight and narrow. :pac:

I'd remove the spire and replace it with a giant solid gold statue of me with a look of disapproval.

EDIT: Hmm, thinking of which that wouldn't sort anything out. But it would be nice to be a dictator.

TanG411

No money, no problems

louisa200

Id get some giant scissors, and cut the whole of dublin out, move it a few inches away from the rest of the country, and leave the rest of the country languishing in deep water, watch it drowning, laugh at the culshies trying to feed their cattle and not even offer a tent to those whose houses are four feet deep in water and good ole irish shi*te ...and wave from the edge.. (oh sorry, it seems like someone already thought up this idea minus the scissors and the few inches) xxx

Dartz

I can picture it now...

Troops marching in lockstep down O'Connel Street.
Missile battery's thundering forward.
Tanks roaring
Jets howling.
Everybody happy... because being unhappy and moaning is a capital crime.

PCPhoto

meh .... gather up all the criminals (repeat offenders) .... put them in a burlap sack (Santa's Bag should be big enough),
.......throw in a few bankers (Management), couple of construction moguls and a scattering of politicians.

Tie it up and throw it in the sea....oh and to make sure it sinks - include Mary Harney.

El Weirdo

louisa200 wrote: »

Id get some giant scissors, and cut the whole of dublin out, move it a few inches away from the rest of the country, and leave the rest of the country languishing in deep water, watch it drowning, laugh at the culshies trying to feed their cattle and not even offer a tent to those whose houses are four feet deep in water and good ole irish shi*te ...and wave from the edge.. (oh sorry, it seems like someone already thought up this idea minus the scissors and the few inches) xxx

What are "culshies"?

Duggy747

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

:rolleyes:

Instant death for the use of that shìte, too :P

punchdrunk

I'd drop the VAT to 12.5%...

My name is URL

I'm with you OP :pac:

People wouldn't like how I'd do things but tough biscuits

First off, I'd give everyone 3 months to decide whether they want to live here or not, after that the borders would be closed to immigration and emmigration

those on the dole would be given jobs maintaining roads etc and prisoners would be sent out to do hard labour

Everyone would be expected to keep and care for a plot of land where they can grow veg and raise livestock

Obviously none of it would work, but meh

Jesus Wept

free donuts.

Turd Ferguson

Duggy747 wrote: »

Instant death for the use of that shìte, too :P

:rolleyes:

You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into!!!

CreepingDeath

1. Public / Civil servants get rises/promotions based on merit, not years of service.

2. The dole declines a certain percentage each year you're on it.

3. Banks charged interest on government bailout funds received.

4. Religious orders to pay entire reparations, not a token amount

5. Public sector pension schemes no longer defined benefit. Nobody in the private sector has that luxury.

6. Minimum wage cut to attempt to retain manufacturing jobs.

7. Unemployed to work 2 days a week to help in state services. Eg. builders to help maintain state/council properties. Others to clean up local litter, maintain parks, maintain school computers etc.

8. Zero tolerance to anti-social behaviour

artanevilla

I'd ban places like this.

Make drugs legal and tax the fcuk out of them.

Bye bye recession and bye bye scum bag drug dealers.

Hello massive drug problem.

meh.

blinding

I would spend about 5 seconds deciding whether to shoot some/all of Fianna Fáil. Then I would shoot all of Fianna Fáil.

RonMexico

Turn Thomond Park into a modern day gladiator arena and invite the local gangs to battle it out once and for all. Fence off the pitch and scatter real weapons on the turf - swords, maces, spears and their old reliable...knives (proper ones not stanley knives). The star attraction will be the presentation of the victory prize to whoever "wins" ...it will be a really hungry polar bear looking for a cuddle (maybe we could ask ze Germans for a loan of Knut).

Once the gangs are done cue Sunday Matinee of bankers, property developers, politicians, pedo priests etc

Oh and I'd invite Thierry Henry to officially open the place and have a kick-about on the pitch.*







* We won't mention the landmines dotted about the place.

robbie_998

i would impose a new law that all women must be naked when in ireland,

also brummytom banned from Ireland and anything irish for life.


+1 on the free donuts !

Agent J

Death penality for anyone who uses the phrases

" Going forward"

Or

"It's important to say..."

jenny2hat

Not me, but my dad keeps going on about leaving Europe...and joining America.
O_o

robbie_998

robbie_998 wrote: »

i would impose a new law that all women must be naked when in ireland,

jesus man! surely not ALL women

CreepingDeath

robbie_998 wrote: »

i would impose a new law that all women must be naked when in ireland,

Oh sweet Jesus no... at least have a selection process that that applies too.

jenny2hat

[quote=[Deleted User];63227943]jesus man! surely not ALL women[/quote]

Shouldn't someone get the job of approving them?

robbie_998

[quote=[Deleted User];63227943]jesus man! surely not ALL women[/QUOTE]

we'll leave out anybody under age, ugly or look even remotely old/ugly.

also being a hairy woman would be against the law ! :pac:

Voltex

Id move the Capital to Carlow (what else has it got going for it)
....Id change the National Language to Polish! ( youd then have more chance of meeting someone who can actually speak the National Language).

Id set up the "Bertie Youth" in honour of our former Furher!
Id buy a rake of Nukes and become a rouge state!
Id build aircraft carriers to keep spanish fishermen out...
Id make sure we have a scary accent...like the Germans..or Croats

Id ban Coronation Street...cause its crap!
Id ban X-Factor...cause its gay!
Id ban Fair City...cause its embarrassing!
Id name Jack O Connor an enemy of the State and Public Eneny#1

Risteard

Voltex wrote: »

Id move the Capital to Carlow (what else has it got going for it)
....Id change the National Language to Polish! ( youd then have more chance of meeting someone who can actually speak the National Language).

Id set up the "Bertie Youth" in honour of our former Furher!
Id buy a rake of Nukes and become a rouge state!
Id build aircraft carriers to keep spanish fishermen out...
Id make sure we have a scary accent...like the Germans..or Croats

Id ban Coronation Street...cause its crap!
Id ban X-Factor...cause its gay!
Id ban Fair City...cause its embarrassing!
Id name Jack O Connor an enemy of the State and Public Eneny#1

Would you ban homosexuality as well?

Voltex

Risteard wrote: »

Would you ban homosexuality as well?

No...id set up camps for re-education:cool:

Risteard

Meh, if there was a reason for banning X-Factor, it's that it promotes manufactured, crap music that infects the radio waves every Christmas.

Not because it's gay, that's just silly.

Dudess

I'd eradicate boggerishness from the cabinet.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

:rolleyes:

You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into!!!

Stop posting that everywhere, Turd.

I've deleted the other ones you made as well.

Duggy747

Risteard wrote: »

Would you ban homosexuality as well?

I presume yes cuz it's gay

I'd incur a time limit to how long you can be on the dole.

Put the prisoners into hard labour, make use of the tax money that's used to give you cushy privileges.

Tweak the law so that if you're a paedo / rapist, you have forfited your right as a human and as a citizen of this country. Now, geeeerout!!

Put a limit on how many kids you can give birth to if you're living off the welfare.

Very short time limit on foreigners wishing to come here and live, unless there's proof you plan to work long-term or study.

Get rid of this "Republic Of Dublin" thing that infects our media and makes people think we have to aspire to it's trends. We're not all raw potato-munching muck men out here, y'know?

Dudess

Risteard wrote: »

Meh, if there was a reason for banning X-Factor, it's that it promotes manufactured, crap music that infects the radio waves every Christmas.

Not because it's gay, that's just silly.

Now you're the one who's being silly...

Bandit12

FF disbanded

Dole cut in half for anyone unemployed for 12 months or more.

Public service pay cut by 35%

All TD's pay slashed by 75%

Anyone who is actually convicted of a crime serves the time allocated and not let out after half the sentence.

Garda given gun's.

Three strikes and your out justice system (yes that means life after your third conviction).

An end to rent allowance. We own the banks,the banks own the developers,the developers own the empty houses/apartments,make them give the houses over in the short term instead of the goverment (taxpayer) paying landlords a fortune to house folks who can't afford a place of their own.

jimmycrackcorm

I'd eat ice cream every day.

phasers

I'd take all the money and move to Switzerland

Voltex

phasers wrote: »

I'd take all the money and move to Switzerland

Id declare war on switzerland and take all their money!!

Risteard

Dudess wrote: »

Now you're the one who's being silly...

Well I wasn't serious. I don't like the music, but banning a show for that would be stupid.

Prof.Badass

Decriminalise all recreational drugs.
Legalise safe and effective recreational drugs from each class in pill form.
Research new safer recreational drugs to replace existing ones.
Encourage people to switch from alcohol to a simmilar but safer drug.
Allow nicotine replacement products to be sold in every shop selling tobacco and encourage smokers to switch to them.
Allow pubs/clubs to stay open 24 hours.
Legalise prostitution.
Abolish all sin taxes (a disgustingly self-righteous concept imo).
Abolish all regressive taxes.
In the same vein as the above point, pass a law making it so that income cannot be used as an excuse to deny any group of people their right to avail of the same government services THEY helped pay for.
Make healthcare completely free to all citizens (paid for with the money saved/gained by legalising drugs).
Make 3rd level education completely free to all citizens.
Enforce strict privacy regulations (cctv, internet, mobile phones etc.).
Place strict limits on the power of government i.e no "protecting people from themselves" ect. (because idiots will inevitably come to power).
Be more leniant towards high rise buildings in the dublin area (to avoid a repeat of what happened the housing market over the last 10 years).
Allow drivers more responsibility over their own speed.
Abolish state funding for private schools.
Abolish transition year and make the leaving cert a 3 year course without adding anything new to the curriculum.
For college applications allow relevant aptitude tests and special dispensations for high grades in relevant subjects.
Drastically cut "class hours" for all but those struggling in primary schools and devote more time to fostering independant learning and P.E (studies point towards shorter days being better for most children. I personally think that 95% of primary school was a waste of time for me).
Try and reduce class sizes (obviously I'm not running off an infinite budget here).
Constitutionally seperate church and state.
Constitutionally enshrine absolute gender equality, no exceptions.
Give each citizen the right to refuse to fight in overseas warfare.
Abolish state recognition of marraige, instead giving benifits to cohabiting parents who don't seperate.
Really push recycling and renewable energy (instead of wasting time with carbon taxes).

Finally (and most ambitiously), Try and get the eu/other western nations to ease up on trade barriers/protectionism, thus helping to end the ultimately useless pattern of unidirectional mass immigration (does near to fuck nothing for the home countries of immigrants, giving them jobs at home would be far more benifical to them, their country and the world as a whole).

Voltex

vinylmesh wrote: »

Decriminalise all recreational drugs.
Legalise safe and effective recreational drugs from each class in pill form.
Research new safer recreational drugs to replace existing ones.
Encourage people to switch from alcohol to a simmilar but safer drug.
Allow nicotine replacement products to be sold in every shop selling tobacco and encourage smokers to switch to them.
Allow pubs/clubs to stay open 24 hours.
Legalise prostitution.
Abolish all sin taxes (a disgustingly self-righteous concept imo).
Abolish all regressive taxes.
In the same vein as the above point, pass a law making it so that income cannot be used as an excuse to deny any group of people their right to avail of the same government services THEY helped pay for.
Make healthcare completely free to all citizens (paid for with the money saved/gained by legalising drugs).
Make 3rd level education completely free to all citizens.
Enforce strict privacy regulations (cctv, internet, mobile phones etc.).
Place strict limits on the power of government i.e no "protecting people from themselves" ect. (because idiots will inevitably come to power).
Be more leniant towards high rise buildings in the dublin area (to avoid a repeat of what happened the housing market over the last 10 years).
Allow drivers more responsibility over their own speed.
Abolish state funding for private schools.
Abolish transition year and make the leaving cert a 3 year course without adding anything new to the curriculum.
For college applications allow relevant aptitude tests and special dispensations for high grades in relevant subjects.
Drastically cut "class hours" for all but those struggling in primary schools and devote more time to fostering independant learning and P.E (studies point towards shorter days being better for most children. I personally think that 95% of primary school was a waste of time for me).
Try and reduce class sizes (obviously I'm not running off an infinite budget here).
Constitutionally seperate church and state.
Constitutionally enshrine absolute gender equality, no exceptions.
Give each citizen the right to refuse to fight in overseas warfare.
Abolish state recognition of marraige, instead giving benifits to cohabiting parents who don't seperate.
Really push recycling and renewable energy (instead of wasting time with carbon taxes).

Finally (and most ambitiously), Try and get the eu/other western nations to ease up on trade barriers/protectionism, thus helping to end the ultimately useless pattern of unidirectional mass immigration (does near to fuck nothing for the home countries of immigrants, giving them jobs at home would be far more benifical to them, their country and the world as a whole).

TLDR
Id still invade Switzerland and kick ass and rob them

blinding

vinylmesh wrote: »

Decriminalise all recreational drugs.
Legalise safe and effective recreational drugs from each class in pill form.
Research new safer recreational drugs to replace existing ones.
Encourage people to switch from alcohol to a simmilar but safer drug.
Allow nicotine replacement products to be sold in every shop selling tobacco and encourage smokers to switch to them.
Allow pubs/clubs to stay open 24 hours.
Legalise prostitution.
Abolish all sin taxes (a disgustingly self-righteous concept imo).
Abolish all regressive taxes.
In the same vein as the above point, pass a law making it so that income cannot be used as an excuse to deny any group of people their right to avail of the same government services THEY helped pay for.
Make healthcare completely free to all citizens (paid for with the money saved/gained by legalising drugs).
Make 3rd level education completely free to all citizens.
Enforce strict privacy regulations (cctv, internet, mobile phones etc.).
Place strict limits on the power of government i.e no "protecting people from themselves" ect. (because idiots will inevitably come to power).
Be more leniant towards high rise buildings in the dublin area (to avoid a repeat of what happened the housing market over the last 10 years).
Allow drivers more responsibility over their own speed.
Abolish state funding for private schools.
Abolish transition year and make the leaving cert a 3 year course without adding anything new to the curriculum.
For college applications allow relevant aptitude tests and special dispensations for high grades in relevant subjects.
Drastically cut "class hours" for all but those struggling in primary schools and devote more time to fostering independant learning and P.E (studies point towards shorter days being better for most children. I personally think that 95% of primary school was a waste of time for me).
Try and reduce class sizes (obviously I'm not running off an infinite budget here).
Constitutionally seperate church and state.
Constitutionally enshrine absolute gender equality, no exceptions.
Give each citizen the right to refuse to fight in overseas warfare.
Abolish state recognition of marraige, instead giving benifits to cohabiting parents who don't seperate.
Really push recycling and renewable energy (instead of wasting time with carbon taxes).

Finally (and most ambitiously), Try and get the eu/other western nations to ease up on trade barriers/protectionism, thus helping to end the ultimately useless pattern of unidirectional mass immigration (does near to fuck nothing for the home countries of immigrants, giving them jobs at home would be far more benifical to them, their country and the world as a whole).

I would have to lock you up before you got started !

phantom_lord

This year's government deficit will be approximately €22bn, despite substantial tax increases in last year's budget. Most of these tax increases have been counterproductive as tax receipts have fallen substantially. Savings of €4bn are hopelessly inadequate if this government is to prevent Ireland returning to a spiral of borrowing, excessive national debt, unemployment and emigration, which characterised the 1970s, '80s and early '90s, before the feckless ditherer Bertie Ahern came to power.

If I were finance minister I would try to identify €20bn savings in one year, and ask everyone to share in this short-term pain, for the near-term gain of returning Ireland's economy to budget surpluses and growth. This needs leadership and vision which would start by scrapping the useless social partnership. Here's how I would go about saving €20bn in 2010.

From 1 January 2010, I would close the more than 1,000 government quangos which currently exist, making all of the useless bureaucrats who populate them redundant and saving €8bn per annum.

I would require all public-sector employees (including the Dáil and Seanad) to work a minimum 40 hour week, with a maximum of 20 days annual leave. No public-sector basic pay would be cut, but all other allowances would be withdrawn. Public-sector pensions would all become defined contribution from 1 January 2010 as well. Any public-sector employee who doesn't like it, could resign, effective from 1 January and get a job in the private sector instead, where all of these terms are standard. Since this would improve productivity in the public sector by at least 20%, every fifth public servant would be made redundant and this would save €5bn.

I would implement the McCarthy report in full and save €5bn a year and reduce all social-welfare benefits, including children's allowance, by 20% saving €4bn a year.

I would also scrap the Dublin Airport Metro (saving €5bn), and sell all semi-state monopolies including ESB, Bord Na Mona, DAA, Iarnóid Eireann and Dublin Bus to the highest bidder, making a one-off saving of €10bn.

Since the above €32bn in recurring and one-off savings would eliminate government borrowings within one year, I would then reduce the tax rate for all people earning less than €70,000 per annum by at least 5%, to encourage/enable them to return to work and encourage employers to create more jobs in Ireland, rather than exporting them to lower-cost countries elsewhere.

El Siglo

Here's the kind of leader I would be.

And I would run the country something along the lines of the Socialist Federal Republic of Yugoslavia.

The Pontiac

phantom_lord wrote: »

This year's government deficit will be approximately €22bn, despite substantial tax increases in last year's budget. Most of these tax increases have been counterproductive as tax receipts have fallen substantially. Savings of €4bn are hopelessly inadequate if this government is to prevent Ireland returning to a spiral of borrowing, excessive national debt, unemployment and emigration, which characterised the 1970s, '80s and early '90s, before the feckless ditherer Bertie Ahern came to power.

If I were finance minister I would try to identify €20bn savings in one year, and ask everyone to share in this short-term pain, for the near-term gain of returning Ireland's economy to budget surpluses and growth. This needs leadership and vision which would start by scrapping the useless social partnership. Here's how I would go about saving €20bn in 2010.

From 1 January 2010, I would close the more than 1,000 government quangos which currently exist, making all of the useless bureaucrats who populate them redundant and saving €8bn per annum.

I would require all public-sector employees (including the Dáil and Seanad) to work a minimum 40 hour week, with a maximum of 20 days annual leave. No public-sector basic pay would be cut, but all other allowances would be withdrawn. Public-sector pensions would all become defined contribution from 1 January 2010 as well. Any public-sector employee who doesn't like it, could resign, effective from 1 January and get a job in the private sector instead, where all of these terms are standard. Since this would improve productivity in the public sector by at least 20%, every fifth public servant would be made redundant and this would save €5bn.

I would implement the McCarthy report in full and save €5bn a year and reduce all social-welfare benefits, including children's allowance, by 20% saving €4bn a year.

I would also scrap the Dublin Airport Metro (saving €5bn), and sell all semi-state monopolies including ESB, Bord Na Mona, DAA, Iarnóid Eireann and Dublin Bus to the highest bidder, making a one-off saving of €10bn.

Since the above €32bn in recurring and one-off savings would eliminate government borrowings within one year, I would then reduce the tax rate for all people earning less than €70,000 per annum by at least 5%, to encourage/enable them to return to work and encourage employers to create more jobs in Ireland, rather than exporting them to lower-cost countries elsewhere.

Hi Michael

Biggins

If I ran the country, well to begin with...

Criminality:

* Life would mean life!
* Hard labour would be re-introduced.
* Residents would be notified (without actually naming them and exact location) if a rapist/molester/etc had moved into their area.
* Phone jamming devices would be used in ALL prisons.
* Sniffer dogs would be used at every prison 24 hours a day.
* Serious drug sellers would be treated in the same vein as murderers and similar tougher sentencing would be introduced - with no parole. I don't give a damn if you were an angel while you were inside, you weren't one outside and thats why your there!
* If you want to earn any privileges within the prison system, you will have to earn them by actually doing something, not because you were passive alone!

Political life (huge topic for me - small version below):

* More defined roles for TD's. If they over stretch their role/boundary, they pay for it.
* If they try to abuse the laws of the land, they are as equally FULLY accountable for their actions. Their high position would be held against them rather than for them - They are supposed to lead us all by example, not run over us in contempt.
* Free all attachments of the Roman Catholic organisation from the daily political machines of Ireland that operate.
* Greater accountability to the public. Transparency as to wages, perks, positions (how there were earned), FULL publication of where public TD money is spent where it wouldn't conflict with the interests of the Gardi/Army and intelligence services for example.
* Loads more but like I said, won't bore this section here in AH.

phantom_lord

Biggins wrote: »

* Phone jamming devices would be used in ALL prisons.

do they not eavesdrop on those phones?

Biggins

phantom_lord wrote: »

do they not eavesdrop on those phones?

At times we can assume.
The hardened criminals will however and normally do, have their own way of getting messages out so that they can still run their rackets from inside.
Only in emergency do they use a hidden mobile. They know the walls do have ears.

MickTipp

id kick all the foreigners out!!

jenny2hat

MickTipp wrote: »

id kick all the foreigners out!!

Why?

mikemac

CreepingDeath wrote: »

5. Public sector pension schemes no longer defined benefit. Nobody in the private sector has that luxury.

Bank of Ireland do

blinding

Did I mention that I would shoot all of Fianna Fáil.

Only it felt so good when I said it and when I dream that I am doing it that I just cannot help myself.

mikemac

blinding wrote: »

Did I mention that I would shoot all of Fianna Fáil.

Only it felt so good when I said it and when I dream that I am doing it that I just cannot help myself.

Tens of thousands of members, you do know that?

blinding

mikemac wrote: »

Tens of thousands of members, you do know that?

I would never tire at that type of activity. You could not call that work.

I would actually want to "do" them all myself.